Doing Josh Lyman - August 2001 State of the Union Challenge
MelWil
Rating - N17
Pairing - Josh/Ainsley
Summary - Too much alcohol, and not much else.
Disclaimer - Rochelle’s mine, no one else is.
Archive: Place it where you like - just let me know.
~*~
Ainsley looked around the crowded Georgetown eatery until she spotted her friend, Rochelle, next to a window. She moved quickly across the room until she reached the table and sat down across from Rochelle with a loud sigh.
“Hi Ainsley.” Rochelle said, without looking up from the large pile of papers she was marking.
“I have a problem, Rochelle.” Ainsley declared.
“So I gathered from the three am phone message you left me.” Rochelle noted dryly. “What’s up?”
“I did the most stupid thing last night. . . .”
“Who did you shag?” Rochelle asked, tucking her hair primly behind her ear.
“Rochelle!” Ainsley exclaimed. “What makes you think . . . I mean . . . I’m just not that kind of . . . “ She screwed her face up in frustration. “Josh Lyman.”
Rochelle closed her marking book and stacked it on the side of the table. “*You* shagged Josh Lyman?” She asked. “You had that specimen of a man in bed with you last night? What on earth could be bad about that?”
Ainsley threw up her hands. “It was terrible! It was quite possibly the worst sex I have ever had in my entire life.” She slammed her hands down on the table. “Let me tell you about it from the beginning. You know how we had that freak snow storm last night?”
“Yeah”
“Well, I had been working down stairs and I hadn’t even heard about it. Everyone who had to drive home had left as soon as they could so they wouldn’t get caught. So by the time I realised that there was a snow storm, there was only one other person left in the building.”
“Josh Lyman.” Rochelle guessed.
Ainsley nodded. “He only lives a walk away from the White House, so he hadn’t been as worried as everyone else about the snow. So when he found out that I hadn’t known about the snow, he offered for me to come and stay at his place. Of course I protested, I said that I could find somewhere to sleep in the West Wing. But he really is kind of persuasive when he wants to be. So I went home with him.”
“So what happened next?” Rochelle asked.
“When we got to his place it was kind of awkward. I mean, we haven’t spent too much time with each other at work, let alone outside of work. So I was wandering around his apartment, trying desperately to think of something to say. And then I commented on his liquor cabinet. And he made some joke about trying to empty the contents. And then I joked that it sounded like a good idea. And suddenly it wasn’t a joke anymore and the two of us were trying to out drink each other and empty the cabinet at the same time.”’
“Wait a minute.” Rochelle had a confused look on her face. “I thought you were a one drink wonder?”
“Two or three drinks actually.” Ainsley correct. “And Josh isn’t much better. Apparently he has a very sensitive system.”
“Ok.”
“Anyway, we’d finished a bottle of something or another and we were pretty happy. Then suddenly Josh puts his hand on my knee and starts kissing me. And I was thinking that I should pull away and slap him or something. But he was a really good kisser and I was actually enjoying myself. So we kept kissing. And then he put his hand under my skirt and it started getting bad.”
“Ape man?”
“Yep. All paws and no fingers. Anyway, he managed to work his way into my underpants and have some kind of effect, even though I think it was mostly because of the alcohol. Then he suggested that we move to the kitchen. And for some reason I thought that was a fantastic idea. So we moved to the kitchen and he started to take my blouse off. And of course I had been at the gym earlier that day, so I still had my sports bra on. And he’s fumbling around madly trying to find a clasp and I was just laughing too much to help him at all. So he gave up trying to get it off and just started kissing me again. And I started to relax a bit more and suggested that we move down to the bedroom. And then the worst thing was revealed. Josh took off his shirt and his pants, and let me tell you it was a question of this.” Ainsley held up her pinkie finger and gave it a little wiggle.
Rochelle bust into laughter. “You’re kidding me. That man is really that little?”
“Well it might have been the alcohol, but I definitely think that he uses his ego to over compensate for other things.” Ainsley shrugged. “But I remembered the old story about it’s not the size that counts. Let me tell you, that if you have no size and you’re drunk, you can’t use it very well either.”
“It was that bad?”
“I have a carrot at home that does a better job.” Ainsley confirmed. “Anyway, I moved myself out the the living room couch and actually managed to get some sleep thinking that I should be able to leave before he woke up in the morning.”
“It didn’t happen?”
“Not a chance. Instead he shook me awake at five am in a huge panic. I was half hung over so I had no idea what he was going on about. Then he pointed to his neck and started swearing and I noticed that I had left a nice collection on hickies.”
“You gave him hickies?” Rochelle asked, trying not to burst into laughter.
“I like to bite. Anyway, I managed to convince him that no one would see them under his shirt and then I realised how awkward the whole situation was. So I collected my stuff and left. What on earth am I going to do?”
Rochelle laughed and opened her marking. “I’m sorry Ains, I’m leaving you totally alone on this one.”
“Thanks Rochelle.” Ainsley said standing to go.
“Just one thing.” Rochelle said suddenly. “You could always submit the story to Cosmopolitan. It sounds like just their type of story.”