Sessions

"Sessions--Part Two: Buffy"

TITLE: Sessions

AUTHOR: Ragna (Obsessive-Compulsive Spike)

RATING: PG

DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just keep my name on it and let me know.

ARCHIVED AT: Welcome to Hellmouth Fan-Fiction

DISCLAIMER: I own only the plot and the characters not on BtVS. Everything else is Joss Whedon's and Mutant Enemy's.

FEEDBACK: Y'all know I thrive on it!

AUTHOR'S NOTES: This is part 2, Buffy's part. Not much else to say on this...oh, BTW, I'm following Ashley (Peroxide Spike)'s theory on Angel's obsession with Buffy in the first part of this story.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"He said I was his? Bastard."

"Angel? I thought you loved him."

"I did...a while ago. But...well...things change."

"I can see that."

"Can you?"

"Well, not entirely. Let's move on."

"To what?"

"How about to your current situation."

"All right."

***

I didn't want to, I really didn't. After I plunged the sword into Angel, I didn't want to fall in love again. Especially with another vampire. So I ran away from the demons. But even when I ran, they followed me.

So, I resigned myself to fate and came back. And then, so did the others. Angel, he was the hardest to deal with. I still loved him, I really did. And when Spike came back, even if it was only for a short time, I felt...uncomfortable.

I wanted to be with Spike, the entire time I was with Angel. And I guess that was when I knew. Spike went on and on about Drusilla, and I got annoyed. Not with him because he was annoying, but because after all the crap she put him through, he still wanted to be with her. Same sitch with me and Angel. And so, I hoped Spike would come back. Alone.

Not so, I found out. Angel had left, to go to Los Angeles. I had my friends, and my Watcher back, but I needed something else. And the lack of it was driving me crazy. So, one night, I decided to get drunk and maybe get hit by a car. Okay, so I was suicidal, so what? That's past now. Anyway, I got some alcohol, drank a little bit, then dropped the bottle and started sobbing.

When I quieted down, I heard someone else pick up. Not mocking, not at all. Just almost like a counterpoint. So I crept over to the other side of the bush, and there he was. In all his miserable glory. Crying over the fact Dru left him again. I startled him, and he got pissed. Almost started a fight. But he couldn't do it.

So we sat down, and just talked. And we decided to meet the next day, just to talk. And soon, it became a habit, the only bright part of my whole miserable existence. I couldn't believe how much we had in common, how much we learned from each other. I felt, for once, I had a true friend.

And to think, it was my mortal enemy.

And then, out of the blue, he kissed me. I didn't stop him, I just enjoyed it. Something as simple as a kiss, once again, flipped my world upside down. Again. I mean, it's my job, my sacred duty, to kill demons like him. But...I can't. I love him too much.

Oh my God. Did I just say I loved him?

Part Three--Spike