Illusions
Illusion: a deceptive appearance, false perception or hallucination...
Wednesday
Ranma eyed Shampoo as she ran towards him, then stiffened as she threw her arms around him and glomped him. His brain swirled for a moment. If the Cat Café didn't serve the best ramen in all of Nerima, he might never have gone there again. Shampoo could get really annoying, glomping him constantly, never letting him eat in peace.
Mousse was sweeping the floor, still embarrassed about being conked in front of Shampoo. Suddenly he heard a noise from the door, and turned to see her standing in the doorway. He brightened and reached into his sleeve for a rose. Maybe if he gave her a rose she'd be happier with him.
Ranma walked into the door and Mousse looked up, seeing a vaguely clear image of Shampoo walking towards the door and the pig-tailed martial artist walking in followed by Akane. Despite the constant flirtations he'd been enjoying all day, Mousse expected Shampoo to glomp Ranma and act mean to Akane.
Mousse hummed a Chinese love song softly to himself as he swept up at closing time that day. Shampoo was doing dishes in the kitchen and she was still wearing the rose behind her ear. It had barely wilted over the working day, and she was singing cheerily as she cleaned.
In her own room, Shampoo lay staring up at the rose suspended above her bed, feeling strange and guilty for enjoying that kiss more than she should have.
Thursday
Shampoo woke early the next morning, but not earlier than Mousse. When she woke up the first thing she heard was him singing softly in the next room. She stretched and yawned, preparing herself for the day ahead. Smiling, the violet-haired girl stood and started to get dressed, moving around the room, wondering why Mousse was singing so happily...then...
It was that evening, after school, that she saw Ranma next. Shampoo needed to talk to him. The day and its almost constant contact with Mousse was nearly driving her insane. She needed to do something about this.
Friday
When Shampoo woke up that morning, she didn't have the energy to move. She just lay in bed and stared at the rose hanging from the ceiling.
'I have until closing time, that will be three days.' Shampoo thought to herself. Lunch break. Coffee break. Ranma came in just before closing time and Shampoo avoided him. After the reception she'd recieved last time she wasn't into asking him for anymore help or advice. Yet another one-track-minded man. Shampoo made another frustrated sound.
He sat down in his favorite booth, Cologne brought him a huge bowl of his favorite and he sat ignoring Shampoo as she cheerfully talked at him and he ate ravenously. Pretty soon Akane would be by and then they could walk to school together in peace and....Akane....
That disconnected his brain for a moment, but he still kept eating. Eating didn't involve brain work. Then he felt an ominous shadow over him. A very familiar ominous shadow.
Looking up from his bowl, he saw Mousse towering over him with a scowl on his face under his glasses. Ranma always had to control a shudder when Mousse wore his glasses. It was strange not to see an opponent's eyes, which helped one to know what he was thinking. The tall black-haired boy had his arms crossed on his chest, and the loose sleeves of his robes probably contained lots of weapons he'd love to use on Ranma.
This was the other reason the Cat Café could be a dangerous place to eat.
"Er...hi Mousse." Ranma said, hoping to avoid a battle so he could just walk to school with Akane in peace....Akane....
"I challenge you to a battle for Shampoo's hand, Saotome." Mousse said, lifting his chin.
Ranma tore his mind from Akane and leaped to his feet, meal temporarily forgotten. The only thing he liked as much as eating was fighting, "I accept!" he yelled, pulling up his sleeves. Shampoo just grinned. She usually didn't mind watching Mousse get whipped, even if it wasn't her doing the whipping.
Suddenly Cologne's staff inserted itself between the boys.
"I won't have you two ruin my restaurant in a blockheaded battle for my great-granddaughter." Cologne growled.
"I'll beat him! Let me claim my bride, old bat!" Mousse yelled, shoving at her staff. Ranma wisely kept his mouth shut. Cologne brought her staff up and with a deft, practiced flick of her wrist brought it down hard on top of Mousse's head, knocking him over.
"Old bat, eh?" she said, leaning over his inert form, "Get back to work!" Mousse picked himself up, trying to retain whatever dignity he still had, and went back into the kitchen. Cologne went puttering back to wherever she'd been before and Shampoo and Ranma sat back down.
Ranma's near-Mousse experience didn't dent his appetite, but Shampoo was still annoying him. There had to be something he could do to get peace from both Shampoo and Mousse, and still be able to eat Amazon ramen. He sighed as he finished his meal, and his full stomach made him get an idea. What was the one thing that could distract both Mousse and Shampoo from concentrating on him when he was there? What was the ONE thing? Getting them together, of course.
Obviously, he knew that wouldn't work for real. Mousse would be happier than ever, but Shampoo would never agree...unless....unless....
"Hey, Shampoo." he said casually. She looked deeply into his eyes and smiled cheerfully.
"Yes, Ranma?" she asked.
"I know he'd believe THAT, but I bet you couldn't keep the act up for, say...three days."
"Shampoo have much willpower. Could do so easily."
"Prove it."
"Why?"
"Um...I'll give you something. What do you want?"
She smiled dreamily, "Big date with airen!"
"Done. If you can keep him on a string for three days, you get a big date with me."
"Done. Shampoo will start right now."
"Remember, you can't pay any attention to me at all, or he won't buy it!"
"Shampoo will pretend Ranma is worst enemy!"
"Good." Ranma grinned to himself, then stood and walked outside, meeting Akane.
"Shampoo? Shampoo? I have something for you." he said, "I want to make your day a little brighter!"
He held the rose out to her, half-hoping she'd take it, but mostly expecting her to hit him across the head or something. She looked at him for a moment, reached her hand out and rubbed the tip of her index finger in the soft petals, a small grin closing her eyes. Then she took it from his hand, tenderly stroking her fingers along the edge of his hand as she did so. His heart started pounding like repeated mallet blows in his chest as she moved a little closer to him, tucking the rose behind her ear and smiling. She looked up adorably into his eyes shaking her bangs back.
"Mousse make Shampoo very happy." she said. He swallowed hard and violently.
"R-r-really?" he stuttered, his face going a little red.
"Yes. Shampoo like rose. Is very beautiful."
"R-r-really?" he said again. Shampoo moved just a hint closer and nodded, then put her hand in the middle of his chest, giggling.
"Mousse help Shampoo set tables for morning customers?"
"Y-yes...I'll help."
"Good. Shampoo glad! Like company of Mousse!" she said, gently removing his glasses from his face and staring into his eyes, "Shampoo like Mousse eyes."
"R-r-really?" he just couldn't stop saying that.
She nodded and replaced his glasses, flirtily moving away from him and walking back out the door, swinging her hips. Mousse stumbled along after.
To his utmost surprise, she didn't.
When Ranma sat down in a booth with Akane, Shampoo simply walked over and stood over the table with a menu.
"Nihao! Welcome to Nekohanten! Ranma and Akane want usual?"
Both nodded and Shampoo cheerily went off to get it. Mousse stared in shock, then waited to see what happened.
Shampoo walked over to the table and set a bowl of ramen in front of each teenager at the table.
"Shampoo..." Akane remarked off-handedly, "What's with the rose?"
"Oooh...is gift from airen!"
"Ranma?!"
"Ranma no airen! Mousse is airen!" Shampoo exclaimed, beckoning Mousse over to the table. Akane stared in shock as he moved towards Shampoo and Shampoo, instead of the usual cuff on the head, wrapped her arms around Mousse and kissed his cheek. Mousse blushed and Shampoo hugged harder.
"I think I've lost my appetite." Akane said to Ranma when the couple left the vicinity.
Ranma just kind of grinned.
Finishing in record time, Mousse put away the broom and walked into the kitchen to watch Shampoo work. His mind was at total peace for the first time in his life since that day when the light had broken on his horizon and he'd realized he was in love with Shampoo. Silently he walked up behind her and took a towel in his hands to dry the dishes she was washing. She smiled up at him and handed him a plate, which he dried. There was no need for words. He was sure it had finally happened - she loved him. After the display with Ranma today, there was no doubt. His heart was floating, his head almost spinning with the elation of his fullfilled dream. Mousse was satisfied. He finally had the one thing he had lived for.
Working together, they finished the dishes in half the time, put up the chairs together and went upstairs for the evening.
Almost nervous, Mousse stopped Shampoo at the top of the stairs and took her hands, "Shampoo, would you like to go on a date with me tonight?" he asked softly, then ducked a little, expecting a blow to the head. She just smiled.
"Walk Shampoo to her room, will hang rose from roof to dry and get ready. Then go on date. Have long date with airen and kiss!" she said, clapping her hands together once. Mousse's head swam. AIREN? He wasn't sure he was going get used to hearing her say that. Not that it bothered him.
They walked to Shampoo's room together and he watched her tie a ribbon around the end of the stem of the rose and hang it from the ceiling above her bed with a pin. His heart was swelling again. When she'd hung up the rose, he left her to get ready, and prepared himself, washing his face and brushing his hair out, changing into a clean robe and pants. A few minutes later there was a knock on his door and he opened it to find Shampoo.
He was awe-inspired.
She wore a fuscia kimono that fit her tight in all the right places and was slit to mid-thigh. Her hair was long and lustrous and hung softly like it always did. He stared blankly for a moment, dazed at how beautiful she could be, even outlined in fuzzy blocks of color as he saw her. He wished with all his heart he could look at her with perfect eyes, focus on her and see her beautiful eyes, her hair. Even with his glasses on, he couldn't see her clearly.
"You're beautiful." he said softly.
"Shampoo thanks Mousse." she said, bowing slightly and he smiled back at her, enjoying fully her adorable baby-talk. Carefully he felt in his pocket to make sure he had the money he'd been saving for months to buy a gift for Shampoo. A date was much better.
They walked downtown together, to one of the best restaurants in town. After working all day they were tired and hungry. The date went by in a blur for Mousse, it was just a swirl of eating together and clinking glasses, sitting in a movie and having Shampoo cling to him in all the scary parts. It was a wonder to be able to hold her.
When they got home Mousse walked her to her room and she stopped him from going straight to his. She blinked slowly, moving so close to him that the scent of her perfume was everything, he could actually feel her body heat. Her face moved close to his and then her lips touched his mouth. They were kissing. The touch was like a live wire for Mousse. A shock like electricity ran through him, and then the world faded and he felt his arms go around her, encircling her narrow waist and holding her close to him, his heart thumping so hard he thought it would blast through his chest. Her arms snaked around his neck. When she released him, his face was all flushed and he was breathing strangely. She smiled, caressed his cheek and walked into her room.
Somehow he stumbled to his room and fell back on his narrow bed, fully clothed. He fell asleep remembering the feeling of her mouth against his.
Then she remembered.
The bet, the date...that kiss...
She shuddered, an incoherent and unexplainable guilt washing through her at the memory of that kiss. Shampoo couldn't be sure why, but the unrestrained longing and emptiness she'd felt from Mousse when her lips met his had touched her soul somehow. She was in this deeper than she'd wanted or expected to be, her feelings were involved and she knew instinctively that feelings were going to be irreparably hurt when she finally had to tell him...to break to him that it was all a joke...all an act...
She touched her lips, standing silently in the middle of her room, holding her pink and purple work clothes, blinking softly, twice. Suddenly Mousse had snapped into humanity for her. He was a real person, with feelings and love and hate and emotion...with beautiful eyes that could be a window to his soul when he wanted them to, and a smile that popped up on his face with the slightest sign of her affection. That smile that she'd so rarely seen through all the pain she'd caused him...it was almost an epiphany. She didn't suddenly love him; she just realized that he was a human and not a slave or work horse for the kitchen.
And most of all, that her actions affected him.
Amazing what a token of affection like a kiss could do to a person's mind, opening it up to possibilities it had never considered before. With the realization that Mousse was a person came a world of things she'd never considered before, that she couldn't begin to sort out until she sat and thought for a while. She could no longer dismiss him...and if he was a person, were not Akane and Ryouga and Ukyou, as much as she disliked them, people as well? She shook her head in confusion.
Now that she had realized Mousse's humanity, his feelings...how could she tell him? How could she take away the dream he'd cherished for fifteen years?
She had two days to figure out how, she decided, calming herself. At any rate, the bet wasn't over until Saturday. Silently she slipped into her work clothes, brushed her hair out and sneaked silently into the hallway towards the bathroom, hoping to avoid any contact with Mousse just yet. But, as she was about to open the door to the bathroom, something tapped her shoulder.
"Oh, Shampoo-oo, I brought you breakfast!" came an urgent, nervous voice from behind her, an all-too-familiar voice. After she jumped in startlement, she turned and, without thinking, raised her fist to hit him over the head. She stopped, blinked twice and watched Mousse duck his head, eyes half closed, hands shaking slightly, preparing for the blow. When it didn't come, Mousse found himself opening his tear-filled eyes to see Shampoo blinking at him silently, staring at his face, fist lowered.
"I-I brought you some br-breakfast, airen." he stuttered, "G-Gomen...sorry for startling you..."
She took the tray from his hands and set it on the floor, looking up intently into his eyes. He quivered slightly, nervous and unsure of what she wanted from him, but fully willing to give her whatever that was. He reminded her somehow of a small, hurt animal in the rain, wanting only to please, to get taken home and loved...
Shampoo touched his face with her small, delicate, cold hands and wiped the remnants of some tears from his face. She could feel the almost musical rhythm of his fear through the quivering of his body, and knew that his mental stability hung on how she reacted to him.
And she didn't know what to do.
Shampoo knew she really should tell him, apologize profusely and help him pack when he would probably want to leave......but there was something in his frightened grey-green eyes that made her wrap her arms around his waist and say 'Nihao, airen! Is okay!', the words feeling like they weren't coming from her mouth at all. His tense body relaxed and he almost clutched her to his chest, kissing the top of her head, holding her like she was more precious than all of China and Japan put together.
"Ranma, is bad. Shampoo no do anymore." she said seriously, sitting across from him in his booth as he ate.
"What?" he asked, mouth full of food.
"Bet! Cannot do anymore!"
"Why?" he asked, shovelling another mouthful.
"Is bad, Ranma. Airen! Mousse is person! You no see what happen to Mousse when Shampoo tell him?!"
Ranma chewed thoughtfully for the first time in his life, "I guess that IS a problem." he commented, "When he finds out its my fault he'll probably kill me."
"Heart be broken." Shampoo reminded him mournfully.
"So you're going to tell him?" Ranma asked.
"No have heart." Shampoo said, deadpan.
"Why? You've helped me whip him before in fights."
"Is no fight. Is feelings..." she tried to explain it, but couldn't come up with the proper Japanese words to share with her true love the strange epiphany she'd had the night before. It wasn't right to hurt Mousse just because he was an overbearing, blind jackass. She made a frustrated face, "Is...is unprovoked."
"I see. What do you want ME to do about it?"
"Tell him! Shampoo no have heart to hurt him."
"He won't believe me. You know the big, dumb guy even better than I do...he'll just think I can't bear the thought of being beaten by him...no, you have to tell him."
With that, Ranma finished his ramen and stood.
"What doing, Ranma?" Shampoo asked in a panicked voice.
"I have to get home to the Tendo dojo." he said apologetically, "I have dish duty with Akane today...one of Kasumi's new rules."
He left the building and Shampoo stamped her foot. This was NOT working out at all as she had planned! She felt a gentle touch on her shoulder and turned to see Mousse.
"What did he do to you, Shampoo?" Mousse asked.
"Is nothing Shampoo can explain." she sighed. Mousse rubbed her shoulders gently but firmly.
"Anything I can do?" he asked softly, whispering into her ear. She shivered a little at the touch of his breath.
"Just keep doing that and I'll be fine." she murmured in Chinese, as if through a deep sleep. Once again, she failed to find the courage to tell him.
"What will we do this evening?" he asked, whispering in her ear again, rubbing away all the sore spots on her shoulders as if he could somehow get into her mind and know exactly where it hurt.
"We should start by closing up the restaurant, shouldn't we?" she asked, again in Chinese. She broke his grip on her shoulders and locked the door behind the last parting customers. Mousse laughed softly. He actually laughed. Shampoo looked over at him and smiled. He was so pleasant when he was happy and contented. Silently he collected his mop and started cleaning up.
Shampoo sat at a table, massaging her own forehead and closing her eyes against the glare of the day coming in through the windows.
"Are you sure you're all right, Shampoo?" Mousse asked.
"No. Shampoo is fine. Mousse need look after Mousse for while. Shampoo take care of self."
Mousse looked confused, "But I want to look after you and do things for you and pr-...." he stopped abruptly and bit his lip, staring at the floor. It was unseemly for an Amazon man to think he could protect anyone, especially a woman.
"Is okay." she whispered, waving her hand at him, "Is okay. Shampoo want those things too, is just time...Shampoo want Mousse happy for himself. Not live so much for Shampoo."
"But, Shampoo, if you actually love me...if it actually happened...I'll gladly live my life for you, I'll gladly DIE for you." he said earnestly, his voice soft and husky. She could tell he meant it from the tension in his voice and body, the softness in his eyes, the restrained emotion playing around the corners of his mouth.
She couldn't handle another revelation of how horribly she was treating him.
"No play games!" she said angrily, springing to her feet, "Shampoo need lie down now. Mousse clean up on own? Is okay?"
"Yes. Anything for you Shampoo." he said, voice clouded with a sad confusion.
"Mousse, why you let people play with your heart?" she asked exhaustedly, and walked up the stairs.
Mousse's confused eyes followed her up the stairs, and he wondered what on Earth she was talking about.
"Oh...Mousse..." she whispered, and rolled over. She'd never considered that hurting him might one day hurt her.
There was a soft knock on the door and then his muffled voice came through the door.
"Shampoo...can I come in?" he asked. His voice was timid, and she could tell that he was scared of her again. When he woke up he couldn't be sure she would still love him. She sighed and threw a pillow over her head.
"Yes." she said through it. The door swung open and she could hear his heavy footsteps on her floor.
"Are you all right?" he asked softly, sitting beside her on her bed. She could feel the mattress bend a little with his added weight. His hand slid over hers, which lay limply on the covers. She didn't want to move, didn't want to get up or see him or touch him. In her mind she could see his confused eyes and concerned face.
"No. Mousse...Shampoo sick, she think...heart hurt." she said. He moved and she could feel his head on the bed beside her. He'd settled on the floor by her bed and lay his head beside hers, albeit not under the pillow. She rolled over to look him in the eye, finding his adorable baby face only inches from her own. She pushed a recalcitrant strand of his black hair behind his ear and sighed, counting the days in her head. Wednesday - first day, Thursday - second day, Friday - third day...
She had to tell him.
Shampoo opened her mouth, drawing in air to speak, ready, working the courage inside her, preparing for his anger or tears or despair.
He put his finger on her lips, cupped her face so, so gently in his big, comforting hands and kissed her. It was the kind of kiss she'd always wanted from Ranma. A slow, soft, kind kiss that touched her heart deeply. She could feel the pulling and longing and emotion in him, tempered with his patient gentleness. Mousse needed her, that much she could tell. His fingers softly stroked her cheek like she was so precious, so special. His lips left hers for a moment and he whispered that he loved her so very much...that his dream was to spend the rest of his life with her...
She couldn't tell him.
He kissed her again.
She really couldn't tell him.
"Muu Tsu, stop." she whispered in Chinese, "Don't kiss me right now." He sat back, staring at her face with his barely-functional eyes, smiling.
"Okay." he said softly, rubbing at his nose. She stared at his face for a moment, studying both it and him. His wide grey-green eyes smiled, seeming to shine with a light from inside. That light had only come on since she'd kissed him the first time. His small mouth was curled into that little, almost out-of-place smile he reserved for her. His thick, lustrous hair framed his face, the bangs cut off straight as a ruler at his eyebrows, the two strands that he hadn't pulled behind his ears framing his small, strong jaw and baby cheeks. The rest of his hair hung loose and fluid behind him, all the way to his waist. He smiled at her and stroked his thumb down her cheekbone.
Shampoo lay silent on her side, staring at him and trying to work up inside herself the capacity to love him. If she could just find it in her to love him the whole mess would be over and it could be so much easier than telling him. If she could just love him.
What she found inside was a deep affection. She loved him like...like...like a brother. Like a friend. But only when he was so happy. When he was unsatisfied and unfullfilled, he was depressing and overbearing and overwhelmingly annoying. Worse yet he was so focussed on her he forgot to concentrate on everything else and acted stupid. He could be such a baka duck boy.
Love.
Love.
Love...
Come on! Love!
But there was nothing.
With that grim knowledge, Shampoo sat up and ran a hand through her hair. It was impossible for the moment, maybe in the future that affection might turn into love, if he would only give up and be her friend it could develop, but for now it was stunted by his suffocation like a tree in the desert and she couldn't cultivate it. She restrained the urge to rip her pillow up over the mess Ranma had got her into. The mess she'd got herself into. She didn't want Mousse to change back into a smothering, overbearing geek again, but she couldn't love him, even the way he was.
Mousse got off the side of her bed and she asked him to leave so she could change. He was happy to oblige her, as always. He was always so infuriatingly eager to please. She growled to herself as she changed into work clothes and threw her sleeping clothes under the bed. Then she stalked around the room, grumbling to herself as she did her hair and applied a little makeup.
"Why must men be so one-track minded? Love love love. And if it's not love it's eating or fighting or some other half-wit thing. If I can manage to pull together a halfway decent personality by combining all of the above, why can't a man?" she muttered in Chinese. With a final frustrated sigh she left her room and walked down the stairs to work.
Mousse gave her a bouquet in the kitchen after Ranma left.
Closing time.
'Well, I guess this evening will be three days.' Shampoo thought, 'That's when we had that date.'
"Would you like to do something together tonight, Shampoo?" Mousse asked.
"No...not formal date. Shampoo not up to it."
"Nothing like that, just a walk in the park and some ice cream or something." Mousse suggested, taking her arm as they closed the restaurant together. Shampoo sighed. Love love love.
She helped clean up and took off her apron.
'After the date will be three days. That's when I kissed him.' she thought as she walked through the park with Mousse, giggling at the ice cream he'd somehow managed to get on the tip of his nose and wondering at his laughter. Still, no love offered to bubble up in her to save her the agony of breaking his little heart.
'After the date.' she reassured herself, working up courage as she licked an ice cream cone.
The 'date' ended and he took her home. He wanted a kiss, she could tell from the jangling of his nerves he was too proud to ask, and not confident enough to take it.
'After the kiss.' she thought resignedly, knowing she wasn't going to tell him tonight. She kissed him, he smiled and didn't act like an overbearing jackass like he usually did. She walked into her room, unsuccessful.
"I'm an Amazon woman." she scolded herself, "I should have the courage for this."