Today it was as struggle to even move. i so wanted to crawl into bed somewhere, was so tempted to bow out of taking my daughter to school, to skip class this morning. But i pulled it together and went on. i had to appologize twice this morning to my family for being short with them. i am so tired, tired from the lack of sleep, tired from this whole new overhaul of my life. Today, though i have pressed on the best i can, i so want to quit.or at least call for a time out. In my focus on the progrm i forgot important things yesterday.a meeting i was supposed to go to, my son's appointment, to make time to do my research during the day. i tend to hyper foucus on one thing,to the detriment of everything else. this lack of ability to manage my time, really lack of ability to keep track of time was a big part of hy i ended up having to quit my other job. Now, everything in my life is such a mess, its hard for me to know how to start cleaning it up. It seems not only overwheoming.but impossible to ever put all of my life in order. i have never really been able to achomplish this. i muddle through, force myself to to keep going even though it seems hopeless,pointless becaue where ever i go my life seems to come back to the same place. sorry this seems so morose, i guess that is what lack of sleep can lead to.