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Pure?

Disclaimer: I don’t own them. If I did I wouldn’t place this under ‘fanfiction’, now would I?

Ship(s):implied Colin/Harry, you can probably draw some sort of Hermione/Ginny out of this because that is what it was intended to be at first but it is no longer pointing to that pairing.

Summery: Hermione writes to her diary about her current obsession. Has a Innocence Obsessed!Hermione and a Whore!Ginny.

AN: I refuse to believe that any of the main characters in Harry Potter are sane. After all they have gone through, one of them is going to crack sometime. That is the idea I based this story on. Hermione becomes obsessed with things easily (research, homework, being the best), so I chose her. I know the type of insanity I gave her(obsession with innocence) probably doesn’t fit how a lot of people see her, but I can see it happening. Hermione loves perfection. Innocence is pure. Purity is perfect. It can have no flaws.

AN: I just read through my fic. Perhaps she is out of character, but I still like my story, even if it doesn’t make sense. ^_^;

 

Hermione’s POV

 

Dear Diary, what have I to say today? I saw Ginny reading alone in the library today. I wonder why she didn’t sit by me? She always does. It’s our table, no one else ever sits there. Why isn’t she sitting there? I wanted to ask her, but I can’t trust myself today. No, I’m out of sorts, but it will pass. I should just wait. Perhaps there is a reason?

 

~

 

Ginny is always so happy. She never seems to frown any more. Strange isn’t it? She has gone through all sorts of things, but she still smiles every day. It is a Saturday so I followed her around and counted her smiles.

She smiled only 5 times. I always thought there would be more but most of hers just seem to be one, long, never-ending, smile.

I saw her frown a bit. She bites her lip when she frowns, did you know? She sticks it out just a little and then pulls a bit back in to bite.

I don’t know which I adore more, her smiles or her frowns.

 

Innocence looks so cute when it is troubled.

 

~

 

Red hair, red hair. Beautiful, beautiful, flaming red hair.

That is what she has. Lovely, darling red hair like that of a china doll.

China dolls break so easily, if I pushed her would she break too?

Such a fragile girl. I could fix her up again with magic.

McGonagall says that my transfiguration skills are advancing far past that of her own when she was my age.

Perhaps if Ginny breaks I could turn her into a dolly? A lovely china dolly, with pretty red hair and sparkling glass eyes.

I could sit her on a little shelf and she could watch the people pass by the window and we could have tea every afternoon at 1 o’ clock,

Ginny and I.

 

~

 

I’m worrying now. Ginny doesn’t speak to me as much as she used to. Perhaps she is sick.

I offered her some medicine but she refused. She said that she was find, ‘nothing to be worried about, really.’

I remember when I used to play with my dollies and whenever one of them got ‘sick’ I would play doctor and nurse them back to health.

They always smiled their strange little smiles, even when they were sick.

Ginny does too.

But she will never admit it.

Bashful is my dolly

 

~

 

Virginia.

Virginia Weasley.

Virginia is a state in America. It was named after the Virgin Queen.

Virginity is such a fragile thing.

Once it’s broken, it can’t be fixed.

If you lose it, you can’t have it back.

If Virginia lost hers, would she exist?

No, she couldn’t. It would be a sin against her name.

Virginia must never be broken.

Otherwise, she simply can not be allowed to exist.

 

~

 

I brushed my dolly’s hair today.

She was getting extra pretty, perhaps she was going to a tea party.

I helped my darling doll put on her blush and bonnet.

I fear she may still be ill, though. She kicked up a fuss over wearing a bonnet.

She said it wasn’t normal.

‘All ladies and dollies wear, bonnets, Ginny. You know that.’

My dolly seems angry at me now.

I wonder why?

 

~

 

I spoke to Remus today. I told her all about how Ginny was and how she was the most perfect little lady, though she seemed out of sorts lately.

Remus smiled at my story, he told me it was sweet.

He said that I my feelings for Ginny must be growing.

I’m like a little puppy, he said.

I follow Ginny just as Colin follows Harry.

Naughty boys, they are. Always scurrying off together without a word, hiding from teachers and no doubt doing things that they ought not be doing.

Little boys are always getting up to some sort of mischief aren’t they?

Little ladies are much better behaved.

Little ladies and their dollies.

 

~

 

I fear for my dolly.

She seems to be getting worse.

She’s always secretive and seldom speaks with me anymore.

Avoiding me now.

I locked her in her room today, she didn’t like it, she yelled and screamed and kicked up a big fuss.

Horribly unladylike.

But fevers make a bad soul of all of us.

Poor darling, trapped in her room with that horrid fire in her mind.

Anger will never help.

I stunned her and tipped her into bed.

She may not enjoy it, but once the fire of her mind is gone, she will not hate me.

 

~

 

I saw her, today.

My doll is breaking.

Her fire is not of the mind but of the heart.

Love is too sweet, too much for my dolly.

I can’t have this, I can not.

She shouldn’t be kissing boys, she is far too young.

Hands do not belong in those places, Virginia, do you wish to keep your name?

I shall bring it up tonight.

I can’t have my dolly broken, her pieces will be too small for me to put back together.

 

~

 

My darling Virginia, what have you done?

You let anger get the best of you dear.

My face still stings from your slap, why must you hate me, dear?

Anger and hate have stolen your soul, how shall I ever pull you back?

I shall save you dear, if I can. I won’t let you fall.

You can never fall from tripping in this world.

Someone must push you.

 

~

 

Broken?

Dolly. My beautiful dolly is broken.

I saw her destroyed in the Herbology gardens this evening.

Her hair was dirt laden and her dress was all out of order, but that could be fixed.

Her name can not.

I couldn’t let it continue.

If my dolly was broken she shall die pure and free, no quick magical fix.

Tears and blood.

The purest things in the world.

My dolly needed them.

I have a knife, a most lovely knife.

It has a shiny handle and the blade is oh so sharp, Mother would never deign to let me near such a thing.

But I am not being a bad girl, I assure you. I am not like the boys who flick away rules without a care.

I only used to knife to save another.

Surely there is no purer act then that?

She was still in the dirt, my dolly, I saw her dirty gown and skin and knew that while those could be cleaned,

Her soul could not.

A small cut was all I needed.

I couldn’t do much more, or her tears would never come.

Her body was weak and exhausted from the corruption so she could put up no fight.

Her tears cleaned her face, little rivers of purity running down her cheeks.

I knew that I couldn’t let her remain this way much longer.

Tears were just to ease the pain.

Blood purifies all.

I drew the knife across her thought, a thin cut at first but the majestic red soon seeped through.

It bathed her skin and her eyes widened.

I knew that she was seeing her wrongs.

Her hand clutched at mine, she needed help, she said.

‘Help me, Hermione, why?’

I don’t know why, dear.

Darkness took your soul at some point.

That must be why you did it.

Aren’t you lucky to have me, I saved you.

You needn’t leave in this horrible state.

I last cut.

Down to her heart.

Gone, she is now.

Safe, her soul rests.

My darling dolly.

I am sorry to lose you.

And I am sorry that I could not save you before you were lost.

But I am happy to have saved you at least, from the horrid sin that would be sure to haunt you.

My darling, darling,

Dolly.

 

~

 

/end Hermione’s POV

 

~

 

And with that last word written, Hermione lit the match and threw it down onto the book. A simple sweep of her wand would be quicker, but this was more satisfying; watching the flames, red as her Ginny's lovely hair, leap up and dance in the air, curling the pages of the diary into little ashes.

Smiling to herself, Hermione turned and left the room. It might burn down, it might not. It didn't really matter to her either way, Ginny was broken and gone and the room could be fixed. Right now all she cared about was finding Pansy; Virginia was no longer a virgin, corrupt and disgusting, a sin against her name, but Pansies are always pure, no matter what you do to them.

"Lovely Pansies....'a pretty little crown on a pretty little girl'" Hermione thought, twirling her hair between her fingers, "I wonder where the keep the Slytherin dorms...."