I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: 'O Lord, 
make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it. 
	- Voltaire

I'm still waiting for someone to credibly explain the difference 
between an action figure and a doll. 
	- Don Device

The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the 
lightning ain't distributed right.
	- Mark Twain

If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the 
people he gave it to. 
	- Dorothy Parker

If you want a kinder world, then behave with kindness; if you want 
a peaceful world, make peace within.
	- Dan Millman

Lightning strikes indiscriminately, but it should strike fools 
predominately.
	- Jack Haydon

Nothing you can't spell will ever work. 
	- Will Rogers

"Try not.  Do, or do not.  There is no try."
	- Yoda, "Star Wars: Episode V, The Empire Strikes Back"

Many people lose their tempers merely from seeing you keep yours.
      - Frank Moore Colby

Nothing baffles the schemes of evil people so much as the calm 
composure of great souls.
	- Gabriel Riqueti Mirabeau

Great minds distinguish themselves not simply with a grasp of the 
extraordinary, but also with an extraordinary grasp of the simple. 
	-M. Fergusson

It wasn't easier said than done if you did it faster than it took 
you to explain what you needed to do.
	- Brian G. Jett

Draw a crazy picture, write a nutty poem, sing a mumble-gumble 
song, whistle through your comb. Do a loony-goony dance 'cross 
the kitchen floor, Put something silly in the world that ain't been
there before. 
	- Shel Silverstien

Believe in miracles but don't depend on them.
	- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics. 
	- Benjamin Disraeli

A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the word you first
thought of. 
	- Burt Bacharach

The sound of tireless voices is the price we pay for the right to 
hear the music of our own opinions.
	- Adlai Stevenson

Trust, like the soul, never returns once it is gone.
	- Publilius Syrus

If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next
to me. 
	- Alice Roosevelt Longworth

I think, therefore I am dangerous.
	- Unknown

Rise above the storm and you will find the sunshine.
	- Mario Fernandez

I'm not overweight. I'm just nine inches too short.
	- Shelley Winters

Tenderness and kindness are not signs of weakness and despair, but 
manifestations of strength and resolutions.
      - Kahlil Gibran

The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it's 
unfamiliar territory.
	- Paul Fix

Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege.
	- Unknown

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance.
	- King George V

If someone offers you a breath mint, accept it.
	- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
	- Anonymous

The two most beautiful words in the English language are 
"check enclosed."
	- Dorothy Parker

Consider the postage stamp; its usefulness consists in the 
ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.
	- Josh Billings

The only thing on this earth that will never die...is a memory.
	- Anonymous

To look up elevates the soul; to watch a falcon take flight 
from the cornice of a building is to envy its freedom, to 
consider the world from a loftier perspective. We need altitude
as much as we need oxygen. To be surrounded by things of 
great height — mountain peaks or skyscrapers — reminds us of 
our fragility but also inspires us to reach for the clouds,
to take our measure and to stretch it.
	- Philippe Petit

Doobee doobee doo...
	- Frank Sinatra

Kindness Comes deep within the heart So, try spreading some 
around.
	- Karen S.Magee

There's a fine line between Clever and Stupid.
	- This is Spinal Tap

Associate with those who help you believe in yourself. 
	– Brooks Robinson

You've got to be original, because if you're like someone 
else, What do they need you for?
	- Bernadette Peters

Don't knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn't 
start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while.
	- Kin Hubbard

To err is human, but when the eraser wears out ahead of the 
pencil, you're overdoing it.
	- Josh Jenkins

The first person who says anything unpleasant will get a swift 
kick in the ass.
	- Phineas, "A Separate Piece"

The absolutely greatest shoes come only in colors you wouldn't 
be caught dead in.  
	-  Unknown

Never eat more than you can lift.
            - Miss Piggy

There ain't no rules around here! We're trying to accomplish 
something!
      - Thomas A. Edison

One doesn't have a sense of humor. It has you.
      - Larry Gelbart

The two most abundant things in the universe are Hydrogren 
and stupidity.
      - Harlan Ellison

There are times when even the best manager is like the little 
boy with the big dog waiting to see where the dog wants to 
go so he can take him there.
        - Lee Iacocca

Where is home? Home is where the heart can laugh without 
shyness. Home is where the heart's tears can dry at their 
own pace.
     - Vernon G. Baker

You ought never to sass old people- unless they sass you first.
        - Mark Twain

Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish 
the rest.
        - Mark Twain

Trust yourself.  You know more than you think you do.
	  - Benjamin Spock, MD

We are cups, constantly and quietly being filled. The trick is 
knowing how to tip ourselves over and let the Beautiful 
Stuff out.
	  - Ray Bradbury

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth 
part of the face.
	- Jack Handey

Everyone has talent.  What is rare is the courage to follow the 
talent into the dark place where it leads.
        - Erica Jong

Sometimes I wish I were a little kid again, skinned knees are 
easier to fix than broken hearts.
        - Unknown

I destroy my enemies when I make them my friends.
        - Abraham Lincoln

Faith in oneself .. is the best and safest course.
        - Michelangelo

To be nobody-but-yourself - in a world which is doing its best 
night and day to make you everybody else - means to fight 
the hardest battle any human being can fight; and never 
stop fighting.
	- E.E. Cummings

I don't even butter my bread. I consider that cooking.
	- Katherine Cebrian

When you find yourself the victim of other people's bitterness, 
ignorance, smallness or insecurities, remember, things could be 
worse - you could be them. 
	- Unknown

Start by doing what's necessary, then do what's 
possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible.
        - Saint Francis of Assisi

If we listened to our intellect, we'd never have a love affair.
We'd never have a friendship. We'd never go into business,
because we'd be cynical. Well, that's nonsense. You've got to
jump off cliffs all the time and build your wings on the way down.
        - Ray Bradbury

The greatest masterpieces were once only pigments on a palette.
        - Henry S. Haskins

I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much 
as a week sometimes to make it up.
        - Mark Twain

Minds are like parachutes: most people use them only as a last 
resort.
        - Ben Ostrowsky
 
When you get to the end of all the light you know and it's time 
to step into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing 
that one of two things shall happen: either you will be given 
something solid to stand on,or you will be taught how to fly. 
        - Edward Teller Hungarian-US nuclear physicist

There is no such thing as darkness; only a failure to see.
        - Malcolm Muggeridge (1903-1990) US writer, critic, educator

Some people stay away from the door for the chance of it opening up.
	- Billy Joel, An Innocent Man

Behold the turtle. He only makes progress when he sticks his 
neck out. 
	- James Bryant Conant, former president of Harvard

Whatever you vividly imagine, ardently desire, sincerely believe 
and enthusiastically act upon... must inevitably come to pass.
	- Paul J. Meyer

Don't let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy.
	- Eagles, from the song, Take it Easy

People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. 
I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this 
world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances 
they want, and if they can't find them make them.
	- George Bernard Shaw

Our moral responsibility is not to stop the future, but to 
shape it... to channel our destiny in humane directions 
and to try to ease the trauma of transition.
	- Alvin Toffler

What is honored in a country will be cultivated there
        - Plato (427?-347? B.C.)

Statistics are no substitute for judgement.
        - Henry Clay

A common mistake that people make when trying to design 
something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity 
of complete fools.
        - Douglas Adams

Do not follow where the path may lead.  Go instead where there 
is no path and leave a trail.
  	- Muriel Strode

The world is very different now. For man holds in his mortal 
hands the power to abolish all forms of human poverty, and all 
forms of human life. 
        - John Fitzgerald Kennedy Inaugural Address

I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds. 
        - J. Robert Oppenheimer On the invention of
           the atom bomb


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