i leave this friday. september 1st, 2000. the beginning of the end of my world as i know it.
i packed this weekend. it felt...wrong. packing away four years of my life. throwing things away that seemed so important then, but are absolutely worthless now.
how can i possibly feel two of the most different emotions at the same time???? i cannot wait to leave. i crave it. and yet...if i could, i would stay a senior in high school forever. where is that damn magic wand of mine? this is what my heart desires...to be young forever. why will no one bless me with this??
sigh. i do not write well. do not argue. i do not know how to write. after 12 years of believing i could write, i have learned that i cannot. can you imagine someone telling you that your talent is worthless? that all the energy you have put into it is...nothing? i put pen to paper and...nothing. absolutely nothing. pure drivel and crap. measured by my writing ability, i am nothing. i am pure drivel and crap.
