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My Bio and Other Random Things...

okie dokie...welcome! ur stay will probably be brief...

Name: Mary C. 'something or other'
Nicknames: Maria, Mare, lambchop, intergalactic hussy (hehe...that one's an inside joke...)
Age: 18
Birthdate: 12-25-81
Eyes: dark brown
Hair: black...jet black ;)

Random Favorite Things:

Color: black, of course. what else would it be? "i'm a creature of the night..." ;)
Coffee: Mocha, definitely.
Author: Dickens. I still cry when I read "A Tale of Two Cities".
(I would put "Book:" here, but I don't think I could choose just one...then u'd be stuck wading through every book I'd ever read...)
Play: Rent, I think. The front row tickets might have been a factor though.
Mag: Marie Claire
Writing Utensil: Pen...preferably a Uniball--any color.

OK. Enough of that crap. I'm tired, but I don't really want to go to bed just yet. And plus, I'm not quite done yet. Here's some other random things I have to say:

sigh. all my life, i've been searching for this unknown thing or person. something, i guess, to make me feel, finally, that i belong.

ever feel like there's a part of your soul missing? that there is someone out there who knows a part of you that you don't? i call them kindred spirits. most people wouldn't know what i'm talking about. but then, most people aren't like me.

i love to dance. it's so freeing. it's one of the few times i can let everything go and just be.

i used to believe that when i found what i was looking for, that i'd just KNOW. that something inside of me would click and that one look would seal our fates.

To Jeremy: Thanks for the inspiration, even if you were an ass. I'm glad we never met. Have a nice life-and I meant that sincerely.

i draw fire. with color pencils usually. and i draw trees. the dead kind. with chalk pastels. today (12-20-99) i molded them together into a tree of fire. i love it. i have to do the final though. i can't wait. :)

i'm not crazy. well, perhaps i am. but i know that i'm not suicidal. and i'm not completely and utterly idealistic. i don't have my head up in the clouds all the time. i don't think i have my head up in the clouds anymore at all actually. life does that to you, i guess. and people too. people who hurt you...they ruin who you are. but i'm not completely and utterly cynical either. because i still believe that someone out there was meant for me. someone was meant to understand me, to love me, to care about me. and i'm determined to find that person.

i was born on dec. 25th, 1981 in sheboygan, wi. i was 3 months late but only weighed the regular 7 lbs., so many ounces. my childhood was spent moving from house to house; i've never lived in the same house for over 2 years. even now, my parents have finally "settled down" and i will have only lived in this house for a year and a half. this instability led me to where i am today, i guess. the only thing i could do was sit in my room and read and imagine places far away. and so here i am today, ready to kill the imagination i loved as a child.

when i was 11, i asked god for a best friend. someone to listen to me. for years, i didn't get one. and so i stopped believing in Him. and just last year, i realized that my prayer was answered. i don't have one best friend though; i have too many to count or name. and i love them. and i realize just how lucky i am...unlike most people.

i have secrets inside me that you might never know. there are scars that run deep into my heart. if you listen closely though, if you perhaps read between the lines, if you close your eyes and can feel what i am saying...then you might be able to see them--to see me.

i'm happy. right here, in this moment. i'm happy. writing the words of my soul. and life is finally good. if it is only in this moment.

that is all for now. enjoy...i just really rambled on. i would say i'm sorry, but you didn't have to read through all of it if you didn't want to. enjoy reading my things...and please please please don't let this page (of all pages) discourage you from looking in i say, "you never know..."


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