The thug found himself thrust into a wall. "The hell you just do that?" He shook his head clear and stared hard at the maniac who'd done nothing but stand there and smile at him. "Just relax, and I won't have to be rough. You see, you're just the sort I'm looking for. If you're good, and hold still, everything will soon become clear." The psychotic grin never left the man's face. "Or, you'll soon be dead. Either way, you won't be left wondering much longer." "The hell I will!" The tough loomed forward. "I already got somebody I'm working for! You can get your magic tricks out of here!" "I think I won't." The man continued to smile. Suddenly, the thug found himself immobile. He could feel impossibly strong arms around him; feel the pressure of being crushed into his captor with a bear hug. But, no matter how he flailed and struggled, he struck nothing, nor so much as brushed against another man's clothing. And there was also the issue of whether his eyes could be believed: as they told the story, he was suspended by nothing in mid air. "As you may need your strength, I suggest you not waste it. You are held fast by my Stand. As, at the present, you don't have one, you'll find you're unable to see or even touch it. It, however, can touch you." The thug felt his ribs squeezed, seeming emphasis to this mysterious antagonist's words. "What the hell are you talking about! What the hell is going on!" The thug still felt struggling would be in his best interest. His expression ever unchanging, the man continued. "If all goes well, you'll know in a moment." With a nod from his likely employer, what appeared to be the psychotic's henchman stepped from the shadows of the dingy alley and notched an arrow in some sort of ornate bow. As the tough's eyes gaped wide, he let fly, the arrow striking a glancing blow to the tough's shoulder. Still, the thug convulsed. He was allowed to fall to the ground, where he shook and spasmed, and even attempted to rise a few times. But, eventually, he simply lay upon the ground, limp and dead. "Ah, well." The evil smile remained. "It seems he could not develop the Stand. I guess he wasn't just the sort I was looking for. Come along, Mr. Van." He turned and walked off, his henchman following close behind him. Elsewhere... "Hide if you like! My Stand's power will find you! No Doubt!" In front of a man with an immaculate white suit, a white and black checkered figure appeared, apparently No Doubt. Raising a cloud of dust, the being caused the dirt particles to spin together at high speed, forming buzz-saw like discs that then arced off in all directions and sliced anything in their paths. "There! How do you like No Doubt's attack, Return of Saturn?" A voice rang out in answer. "It's pretty straightforward. I see how it works already. But, it looks like it could be pretty useful! Let me try! Return of Saturn!" "Wha...what?" the man in the suit choked out, as discs of dust just like the ones his Stand had just used raced toward him. Twisting and dodging to avoid the razor-sharp projectiles, he slipped and fell on his face in the dirt. Scrambling to his feet and waving dust away from his eyes, he searched the area frantically for his enemy or his enemy's Stand. However, all he caught sight of was his own stand, coming towards him. Then, he caught sight of his Stand again, floating in place a few feet away. Realizing too late his predicament, he lacked even the time to guard his chest as the Stand he had first seen plunged its hand into it. Gargling blood for a second, he then collapsed in death, the true No Doubt fading away as he did so. The false No Doubt's features melted away into a blank, steel-gray body as a man in sunglasses with slicked-back hair emerged from some nearby brush. "A villain like you had no chance against my Stand! Karma Chameleon upholds justice!" he stated emphatically. He froze as another Stand rose up and prepared to bludgeon him from behind. "Emperor!" The very image of a cowboy jumped out from behind another bit of brush and fired a shot from the odd looking gun in his hand. Flying straight toward the wielder of Karma Chameleon, the bullet bent its path around him and struck the attacking Stand squarely in the forehead. Its user jumped out of his own hiding place just long enough to display the bullet wound in his forehead, before joining his Stand in oblivion. "Whew! Looks like we've taken care of the Stephani Brothers," spoke the cowboy. "That's $30,000 U.S. for each of us, right Mr. Hammer?" Michael Christian Hammer smiled. "Call me Mike, Mr. Horse. You've proven yourself to be quite reformed." "Well," the cowboy smiled in return, "if being a bad guy has taught me anything, it's that the good guys always win. I figure I ain't got no reason not to be one of the good guys. Plus, it's a real hoot to have law enforcement agencies writing checks for me instead of warrants! Oh, and Hol's fine." "Now that you're reformed, Hol, I think my next job is to get you into it for the justice instead of the money." Improfanfic and Gaijin Dan Mastriani present A JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Side Story: And Justice For All Chapter 1: "Another Bow and Arrow" This chapter by Gaijin Dan Mastriani. JoJo's Bizarre Adventure and the characters from said story used herein created by Hirohiko Araki. As the knife suddenly appeared and flew towards the old man's throat, he barely had the time to scream. "OH MY GOD!" Joseph Joestar jerked to a sitting position in bed. He felt his neck, even though he knew that what had happened had happened years ago. Dio was dead; he was not. Even so, being so close to death isn't something one easily forgets, as the occasional nightmare reminded Joseph. And, there were still evil Stand Users in the world. Knowing he'd have no more sleep tonight, Joseph left his wife Suzie Q's side and decided to try doing something productive. But what? Perhaps he'd check his e-mail, though he was still less than enamoured with the computer revolution. He flipped the switch and waited. Why didn't these things just turn on, anyway? You didn't have to go through all this rigmarole to read real mail. Finally, it was on. Now, his grandson Jotaro had shown him how to do this. He needed only to remember how. A click here. A little typing there. He allowed the purple energy vines of his Stand, Hermit Purple, to grow from his hand for a moment. It might be possible to use Hermit Purple's powers to control the computer, but then he'd likely destroy it like he had to to use Polaroid cameras as a medium for Hermit Purple's limited clairvoyance. Looked like he had something. "To: JJoestar67@aol.com From: BHansen@speedwagon.com Dear Mr. Joestar, Evidence has come to my attention that suggests that a Bow and Arrow similar to the one Dio used to give his henchmen Stands may have surfaced in New York. I will contact you when I know more. Sincerely, Beck Hansen" "This," reflected Joseph, "could be trouble." "Eddie." Mr. Van nodded to the dapper gentleman coming in the door. Eddie Halen returned the nod. "Alex." He followed his associate down the hall of the Manhattan townhouse. The two men ascended to the penthouse, where Halen waited as Van ventured inside. Encountering the man with the permanent grin sitting with the paper in a room full of disparate antique lamps, Van cleared his throat. "Mr. Jacko?" Mr. Jacko turned the page. "Mr. Halen is here." Jacko folded the paper neatly and placed it upon the table. Without turning his head, he spoke. "Do bring him in, Mr. Van." "Certainly, sir." Van retraced his steps to the door and admitted Halen. Halen made a polite bow to Jacko. "Sir." Jacko's eyes slid toward him. "I trust you've found the next subject." Halen bowed again. "I humbly apologize for the previous failure. However, data indicates that this next subject may develop a very unique Stand." "This is, after all," Jacko resumed his paper, "a business of trial and error. Mistakes are inevitable at this point. However, thanks to the current method that you have provided, we are at the present time largely safe from the attentions of the Speedwagon Foundation and its incessant cataloguing of Stand Users. Therefore, patience can be afforded. I find your level of effort satisfactory, Mr. Halen." "I'm pleased that you feel so, Sir." "Mr. Van. Mr. Halen. Make the needed preparations. After all, we never know when we may encounter the Stand that matches the Unrivaled Stand I have been seeking." Mr. Jacko's smile became the scant few centimeters wider it could become. "There you are, Mr. Horse." The girl behind the counter smiled winningly. "$60,000 for bringing to justice Glen and Eric Stephani. I must say, it's quite impressive, Mr. Horse. The Stephani Brothers killed all the bounty hunters that attempted to collect the reward on their heads previously." Hol leaned forward onto the counter. "That isn't all that's impressive about me, baby. You know, I might be in town a few more days, and I could use someone to help me spend all this money." The clerk looked over Hol Horse for a few seconds, then looked past him to the next man in line. "Next, please." Hol walked away and shrugged. "No accounting for taste." Finding his partner Hammer amongst the wanted posters, he clapped him firmly on the shoulder. "So, found our next job?" "Yeah." M. C.'s eyes bored into the paper he held. "We're definitely taking this one." Hol lit up a cigarette. "You look real interested. What's the job?" "We've got a target, but we've also got escort duty. Apparently, somebody'll be coming along to make sure we get the job done." Hammer's frown deepened. "But we'll be sure to get this guy." "Sure." Hol smiled, "Between my gun Emperor and your copied Stand Abilities, we ought to be able to handle it. Say, who's the guy who's back we have to watch?" "Some old guy by the name of Joseph Joestar." Hol's eyes went wide. "Joseph Joestar! You're kidding! No way, man! That's one of the guys Dio hired me to go after! He'll kill me if he sees me!" Mike began to walk for the door. "Stay behind if you like. I'm not passing up this mark." "Hey, hey! Hold on!" Hol rushed into stride with his partner. "You're really that gung-ho about this? What's it paying?" "One million. Each of us." Hol nearly fell over before getting back in step with Hammer. "You know, when I think about it, there's no harm in going. I suppose I can always run away if Joestar isn't in a forgiving mood. I mean, he's pretty old by now. Probably not as fast as he used to be. For that kind of money, I'll risk it." "I don't care about the money." Michael shoved the doors open and stepped out into the sun. "I just want a shot at him." "Him who?" Hammer passed Hol the blurry photo that had been in information packet detailing the job. Though his features were difficult to make out, a sadistic smile was clearly visible. "This man. He's the man that killed my best friend." Hol worked his cigarette to the other side of his mouth. "Sure?" "I'll never forget his face. That smile is enough for me to recognize him. He didn't stop smiling the whole time." "So, what happened, exactly?" Michael looked out into the sky. "It was three years ago..." Three years ago... "Freeze!" Michael Hammer aimed his gun at the young punk who he had chased into an alley. "Police! You're under arrest!" Seeing himself literally backed into a corner, the punk turned and shakily put his hands into the air. "Hey, I give! I give! This ain't worth gettin' shot!" Mike moved closer, then put away his gun and slapped handcuffs around the perpetrator's wrists. "Okay, talk. Where's your buddy? I saw him go in this direction, too." The kid's quick glance to his left gave him away. Twisting his body and reaching for his sidearm, Hammer found himself too slow, a most likely illegal handgun already trained on him and a fraction of a second away from firing. "Pose!" The gunman found himself frozen in place as a pink-haired officer in John Lennon sunglasses casually unwrapped his fingers from the gun and slipped handcuffs around his wrists. "Police. You're under arrest for robbery and resisting arrest. Mirandize 'em, Mike." Able to move again, the perp's eyes darted between Mike and the cop that had cuffed him. "The hell...the hell you just do! How the hell did you just do that!" The pink-haired man just smiled. "Do what? I told you to freeze, you did what you were told." "You did something, man! You did something!" The kid tried to back away, but fell on his rear. Mike hauled him up. "He did something, alright. He arrested you. You have the right to remain silent. And by that, I mean shut up. Anything you say and do can be used against you in a court of law." As Hammer continued to detail the crooks' Miranda Rights, his partner strolled back to the patrol car. Taking a second to polish the "H. Matsumoto" name plate on his uniform, he leaned into the car to radio in the arrest. Something stopped him. An odd feeling in the pit of his stomach, he stood up straight and surveyed the surrounding area. "Hide?" Mike led the two boys in custody towards the car. "What's up?" "Not sure." Hide's eyes never left a certain alley that had caught his interest. Faking a smile, he turned back to his partner. "Hey, I'm just going to go check out that alley over there. Show these fine gentlemen to their seats and call it in, would you?" Mike frowned a little. "You're going alone?" Hide shrugged. "Just got a weird feeling, is all. It's probably nothing, but catch up if I'm not back before you're done." Hide walked off. "Yeah, sure." Mike watched him go, then saw to it that the arrested were shoved securely in the back seat. Walking around the door as he closed it, he leaned into the front and lifted the receiver from its cradle. "Hammer here. Calling in an arrest." "Read you, Hammer," crackled the reply. "What's your location?" "I'm at..." began Hammer, before a shout from the alley caught his ears. A shout that sounded a lot like: "Pose!" "Was that...Hide using his Stand Ability?" "Hammer, repeat. I didn't copy," voiced the radio. "I'll get back to you!" Hammer tossed to dispatch, then dropping the handset and dashing pell-mell for the alley. Hammer ran in to see Hide laid out on the pavement, hyperventilating and with the color slowly disappearing from him complexion. Hammer dropped to his knees before him and quickly checked him over, but could find no sign of injury. "Hide! Hide, what happened!" "S...Stand! My...Stand!" Hide gasped out. "Your Stand?" Mike shook his friend. "What happened to your Stand?" "I did." Moriarty Jacko stepped out from the shadows. "Stand wielding police officers. How novel." "Karma Chameleon!" Having summoned his Stand, Hammer laid his friend back down gently before jumping to his feet to face Hide's assailant. "Who the hell are you, and what did you do to Hide!" The sadistic smile on Jacko's face remained unchanged. "What an interesting Stand. But unlike your friend's, it's of no use to me." "Damn you, tell me what you've done!" Karma Chameleon took on a fighting stance. Jacko turned away. "You're lucky. I'm in a good mood, so I won't bother killing you." He moved his eyes to a corner of the alley and nodded his head. Hammer felt a sharp blow to the back of his head, and then everything was black. Hammer parked the rental car back at the terminal, and exited through the driver's side door. "And that's what happened. By the time I woke up, Hide was gone. Forensics turned up nothing, but I wasn't surprised. After that, I quit the force and became a bounty hunter, all so I could look for him." "Whew." Hol Horse stepped out of the passenger side, and slammed the door. "This guy sounds like real trouble. What's his Stand Ability?" Mike walked off to sign in the card, Hol following behind him. "No idea. Even when I've had leads on him, no one knew his Stand Ability, or even his name. Seems everyone who's seen him and lived has had pretty much the same experience as me. I still wish I knew how he beat Pose. I didn't think anything could stop Hide's Stand Ability." Hol shrugged. "From your story, sounds like he had another guy with him. The other guy probably distracted your buddy while the psycho put the moves on him. This time, you'll have me backing you up. You know Pose, too, so we ought to have him dead to rights." Michael shook his head. "Karma Chameleon can't just steal other Stands' Abilities. It has to learn them. Stuff like Return of Saturn is easy, so Karma Chameleon can start using it right after it sees it. As for Pose, it still can't do it, even three years later." "Anyhow," Hol scratched his head just under his ten-gallon hat, "you even sure the guy we're after killed your buddy. Might have been his stooge." The smiling face of Hide's killer flashed through Hammer's mind. "No, it was him. Remember, his friend had to bash me in the back of the head. Hide didn't have a mark on him." The two bounty hunters walked into the rental building, where Mike headed to the desk and fished around for his credit card. Hol tipped his hat and lit up a cigarette. "Must be a tough customer. Guess it's a good thing Joseph Joestar will be with us. The old coot is tougher than leather, steel, and ten-cent steak put together." "Excuse me, sir, but smoking isn't allowed in here," an attendant reminded Hol. He ignored him. Hammer finally finished paying for the use of the car. "I'm a lot stronger now than I was then. The three of us won't fail to finish him off." He started off towards the airport terminal. "C'mon, Hol. We don't want to miss our flight." Hol fell into step with him. "Right behind you, pal." The airplane's PA system dinged. "We have now reached cruising altitude. You are now free to use cell phones and other electronic devices." Joseph Joestar did just that. "I'm on my way," he told Beck Hansen at the other end of the line. "I wish you'd reconsider," Beck replied. "Are you even taking anyone with you?" "Like who? Jotaro's just gone out to see on a research trip; he won't be back for months, and who knows where he is in the meantime. I have no idea what the hell that weird-haired freak Polnareff is doing or where's he's gotten off to, and nobody seems to be able to find out. Abdul, Iggi and Kakyoin are dead, like the rest of us would have been if not for them. And Josuke and his friends are still just kids. Sure, they did a good job, but I'm not getting them involved in anything else if I can help it. Hell, I saved the world before, I'll do it again." "Joseph, that was seventy years ago. I'll admit you're still in good shape, thanks to that obscure martial arts style you use, but you can't possibly do this alone." The old man rolled his eyes. "Who've I got to help me?" "Well," Beck began, "I didn't think you'd listen to me, so I took the liberty of contracting you some help." Joseph looked out the window. "Yeah?" "A couple of bounty hunters that have been making real names for themselves recently. They've been taking out a lot of tough criminals that used Stands to keep ahead of the law. Their flight is arriving a little earlier than yours, so they should be waiting for you in the lobby. I've given them a picture of you, so they should be able to pick you out." "I suppose I ought to ask their names." "Michael Christian Hammer and Hol Horse." Mr. Joestar nearly dropped his phone. "HOL HORSE! Are you stupid? That jackass was one of the assassins Dio sent to kill us! If I ever see that gutless cowboy wannabe again, I'm going to kill him!" "Mr. Joestar, please, relax! You're going to scare the other passengers!" "And you're going to get me killed! What were you thinking!" "I swear, Mr. Joestar, he's cleaned up his act! Ever since he got out of the hospital in Egypt, he's stayed well within the bounds of the law. Anyway, it's Hol Horse. The worst he'd do, considering what I'm paying him, is run away." "Yeah, I suppose he doesn't have the grapes to doublecross me, but I still don't like him." "We can try and find Jotaro, if you really want." "No. Even if you could, and he virtually disappears when he's at sea, I don't think you should bother him. He's got a family now. He's away from them enough as it is. I'll take care of this, even if I have to do it with Hol Horse tagging along. At least tell me the other guy's somebody competent." "He's an ex-cop who quit the force after his partner died mysteriously. He was very insistent about doing this job. He's got an excellent record, though." "He insisted, huh? Sounds like this is personal. I like that. Anyway, I'm taking a nap. I'll catch you later, Beck." Joseph Joestar flipped his cell phone closed and slid his fedora over his face in preparation for getting some sleep. The young girl struggled desperately against nothing, her mouth muffled from screaming by an invisible hand. "Really, my dear," spoke the maniacally grinning Moriarty Jacko, "you shouldn't struggle so. Do you want my associate's shot to hit you in some place...damaging?" She closed her eyes, determined to die with dignity at least. Thus, you could imagine her surprise when an arrow merely nicked the side of her head, and she was allowed to fall to the ground. The cut stung a little, and she had an odd feeling, but otherwise she seemed fine. Well, if this guy simply intended to cut her a little and let her go, she wasn't about to argue he should do more. She was about to run, when she was frightened to see that where before there had been only a vague pressure on her shoulder, there was now a hand. Jacko seemed to find her fear amusing as he spoke again. "Now, in all likelihood, you won't be alive much longer, but I feel I should explain to you the situation a bit. That, my dear, is my Stand: Smooth Criminal." He indicated the vague form that was gradually becoming clearer in the girl's eyes. "You can now see it because you now have a Stand as well. Attempt to manifest it, if you would, so that we might proceed with things." The girl didn't really understand it. It was bizarre. It didn't make any sense. But, she had to do something. She had to try and fight back. She had to fight. A vague shape nearly formed in front of her, struggling to become visible. Jacko's eyes seemed to sparkle. "Ah. That's very good for a first try. As Mr. Halen promised, your Stand looks to be ripe with potential. It could have some very useful abilities if properly developed. I think I'll take it." The girl stared at Jacko. "Wha...what?" "You see, my dear, several years ago there was a man named Dio. His Stand was said to be invincible. However, he died and no one seems to know just what his invincible Stand Ability was. As I also want to be invincible, I have been forced to search for this invincible Stand Ability, even though I don't know what it is. But, eventually, I too will have an invincible Stand. And you're going to help me." Smooth Criminal moved towards the girl's newly born Stand. The next day, the girl's dead body was found in the alley. A cause of death could not be determined. TO BE CONTINUED... Author's Notes: Hi, all five people bothering to read this. ^_^ If you didn't know, I love JoJo. That's why, no matter how little I thought of the starter's prospects, I had to write this. However, I've done what I could to make the world of JoJo's Bizarre Adventure make sense to those unacquainted with it. I hope I've succeeded, at least somewhat. JoJo is a very unique story, and with any luck I've captured some of it here. If anyone was interested enough to read this far, but is still unclear on things, head on over to http://www.sonic.net/~jason/jojo.html where just about any question you could have will be answered by the suitably comprehensive JoJo FAQ. A character guide, with pictures, for all six series is available at http://www.geocities.com/noriaki_kakyouin/index.htm, which also has a great links section and info on Stands and Hamon. And series three is being fan-translated and can be read at http://nine.cx/jojo/. Still, if people ask, I'm well prepared to write up character profiles to more solidly define any and all characters and their Stand Abilities. I'd like to thank my pre-readers Steven Scougall, Aaron Peori, and Eric Terao. I appreciate all three of you taking the time out of your busy schedules to sit though my fanfic. Honorable mention goes to Jason Heavensrun for offering to pre-read, even though he ended up not having the time. It's the thought that counts, and this isn't any more important than the other things in your life. In closing, I just hope that people enjoyed this, and will consider signing up for it. Nothing would make me happier than a JoJo's Bizarre Adventure impro with a strong following.