BORN BEAUTIFUL

 

She was born beautiful 

I was born to lie 

To look her in the eyes 

And tell her everything's fine 



She could shit flowers 

But I was a piece of crap 

Lung cancer or a heart attack 

I was the reason it didn't last 



Looking through a folder 

I found your picture 

I picked it up and kissed it 

And then I ripped it into bits 



I wish that I was beautiful 

That I had things you have 

But I'm much too bad 

To ever be beautiful like that 





ABANDONED CHILD 



I've got troubles in this mind 

And I've got fire in this fist 

You've got water for your Scotch 

And daddy's razors for your wrists 



I've got notches on the post 

And a bottle for these tears 

You've got flowers for your funeral 

A resting place for your fears 



It's never enough for the one's you love 

And it's never enough for you 

To be an abandoned child 

Having to suffer 

To be an abandoned child 

You've got to suffer 



Don’t go looking for a sweet kid 

Behind my killer eyes 

Babe, I’m a switchblade 

Ready to gut you like a fish 





ANGER DANCE 



When will I ruin you? 

That beautiful head of yours 

I'd hate to scratch it 

The thing is so perfectly empty 

With eyes that lead to nowhere 

I'd love to fuck your smile 

You caught me in the closet 

Searching through garbage bags 

Full of after-breakfast sex 

And now I'm nothing but a cigarette smoking loser 

Full of hate and envy 

I'm like cancer in the air 

Don't you want me gone already? 

I want you dead 



When will I catch on to you? 

That fucked up shit of yours 

It truly stinks 

You're always so perfectly sane 

The way you through up after lunch 

Just to stay sexy 

You kept me in the closet 

With some world class blow-jobs 

And sentiments of love 

And now I'm nothing but the faggot you turned me into 

I'm like cancer in the air 

Don't you want me dead already? 

I want it too 

Give me the barrel 

I'll suck it like a cock 

THE MURDER OF ELEANOR KNOWLES



They found her body

Behind her house

Down by the railroad tracks



In faded jeans

With a frozen face

Holding a Madonna tape



At school we used to laugh

And throw handfuls of gravel

We'd yell, "Eleanor!"

"Eleanor!"



No one missed her

She was hard to look at

The fact is that we all helped kill her





SHE'S GOT HER EYES ON BIGGER MEAT THAN YOU, FRIEND



She's like a baby

She's got to be rocked

Tonight I'll be her daddy

Because it's what she wants

And if I save her

She'll swallow me whole

I'll even call her beautiful

So she'll love me more

She's my mother

A cocksucker

It's what I want

And what she wants too

She's got her eyes on bigger meat than you





WHISKEY DICK



Laying naked in the sweat

Unerrect

In a pool of ourselves

I'm half a man

I was too drunk to fuck

Or too involved

Now there's silence in silence in the silent room

What does this mean

If anything at all

Maybe it's too fast

I don't know

Baby, I'm sorry

I can't look at myself in the bathroom mirror

You may forgive me

But I can't

Please forgive me

Because I don't





REMNANTS (PART II)



What's the point in masturbating?

If all you get is blood

And what's the point in loving?

If all you get is shit

When I drink myself to sleep

I smoke myself to death

It's all for you sweet baby

A destructive tribute

Because I know that you don't love me

The way I want you to

No, I know that you don't love me

The way that I love you

So go to sleep tonight with your man

In your bittersweet madness

And the tenderness you will find

Will somehow comfort you

Because you're the only woman I've ever loved





SONG ABOUT YOUR FATHER



There ain't nothing left to say

I'm bare down to the bone

I'm coming apart at the seams

I'm bleeding from every hole



I'm sucking on my bottle

With bloodshot eyes

As the world passes by

And I try to forget



That baby doesn't love me

Daddy's fall down drunk

He's masturbating in the bathroom

And mommy hates him too



I can't help but think

About the great misfortune spent on me

How I'm so fucked up

And I want you to kill me

Put one in my head

And end my misery





THE SINS OF JESUS



Seeing the error

Of all my ways

And wasted days

They've come to destroy me

Like an angry cancer



Mourning the loss

Of a lover past

My favorite yet

She's something I'll never forget

Tattooed on my ass



And no one believes us

When we say we were as evil

As the sins of Jesus

The sins of Jesus





KNIFE



I wish I were a poet

That I wrote in metaphor

Or that I was brilliant

Or ruggedly handsome

That I might fit inside you

Or wrap around you like skin



He and I are but shapes

Trying to fill the same space

He is brilliantly handsome

Whereas I'm a poetic metaphor

That never gets inside 

Your olive skin



I am a knife

You can cut the ugly flesh enwrapping your beauty 

Or use it to kill the monsters that have tried to devour you

This weapon is protection that will never fail you

But be careful not to drop it or lose it

Because you never know when you might need it







PROSTHETIC SOUL



You make me feel homeless

Like I've got no place left to go

You make me feel helpless 

And you make me feel alone



Something died in me a long time ago

That's when they gave me this prosthetic soul



You make me feel abandoned

Like I'm the one you blame

Like I'm the one that's supposed to suffer

You make me feel ashamed



Something died in me a long time ago

That's when they gave me this prosthetic soul



You make it seem so final

Like there's no corner left to turn

You make me feel like an asshole

Like I'm never going to learn



Something died in me a long time ago

That's when they gave me this prosthetic soul





MYSTERIOUS HAND



The mysterious hand

That grapples my throat

Squeezes out my tongue

And all the air from my lungs



My brain was loaded with information

On what to do in case of emergency

But I buckled under pressure

And could not escape



All of a sudden alone

With only my death to keep me company

I cried out to the mysterious hand

To grant me but one last request



Have me stuffed and put the hearth

In the house of my last girlfriend

To always remind her

Of the shitty way that she dumped me





LETTER TO JESUS



I wrote a letter to Jesus

With my big giant blue magic marker

On the back of my parent's copy of the Beatles' 'Let It Be'

I sent it UPS



In the letter I said how I loved Him

How I thought He looked sexy in church

His beautiful dancer body posing

Hung for us all on that cross



"Jesus", I said, "Come see me.

I live in Sioux City, Iowa.

I work at the Piggily Wiggily

And my name is Jerome Saint Gerard.



We could hang out or go see a movie

Or watch the airplanes land at the airport.

Or if you want we could go to the beach

And do that thing with the footprints where you carry me"







FLESH



I lost it the moment I began to care

And talked about it

I fucked the love right out of her

Like some flesh



It tasted good and we ate it

She told me it was beautiful

She fucked the love right out of me

I was just flesh



There's nothing like a moment alone

With Nina Simone

To help put things into perspective 

The way I should

But still I couldn't stop crying

If I tried to

These tears on my flesh

Feel too good



We came together to a conclusion

But soon it got forgotten

When we fucked the love right out of it

We became flesh







TELEVISION BLUE



Amen, there is no Heaven

Amen, there is no Hell

Amen, take a look around

Couldn't you tell, couldn't you tell



We live our lives in television blue

Our hearts some Marlboro red

Just you and me girlfriend

In that same old familiar bed, familiar bed



Sometimes it's beautiful

Sometimes it's mean

Sometimes it's dirty

Sometimes it's clean



And sometimes I wonder

What goes on in that pretty little head

What goes on behind those pretty blue eyes

When I kiss those pretty red lips

And tell you great big lies

What goes on

In television blue







GOD AWFUL



As lonely as God

Sitting in my high house

Staring down at you



At all you doubters

And pathetic self-abusers

What right do you have to judge me?



Who gave you MTV?

I did

Who gave you Hustler magazine?

I did

Who gave you semi-automatic rifles?

I did

Who gave you crack cocaine?

I did, I did



Its lonely being God

Sitting in this high house

Looking down on you





I'M YOUR WHORE



I keep coming back

For more and more

Give it to me, give it to me

I'm your whore



Let me have it

On the lips

I'm crazy, babe

I'll never quit



Whip me, chain me,

Beat me, kill

Bedposts, handcuffs

You know I will



Love's a gun

That I'm under

Pain is fun

When you're younger



Love's a toy

In twisted in hands

You want a boy

And I'm your man



I'll keep coming back

For more and more

Give it to me, give it to me

I'm your whore