Who I Am...and What I'm Thinking Today

Who am I? Just an average woman, really. A wife, a "mom" to my pets, an "auntie" three times over, a friend. I'm also an Adult Child, a recovering alcoholic since 1993, and a daily survivor of clinical depression. I'm devoted to my Brother Wolf, who aided me at the time of my spiritual awakening, and who speaks to me still in my visions and meditations. I'm also a student working to learn the Lakota way, to which I have been led. I'm a nut for horror novels, ladies' figure skating, public television and nature shows, really tacky jokes, dark chocolate, and the photos of Jim Brandenburg (who I happen to think is the FOREMOST photographer of wolves in the world). I love listening to the ocean at high tide, and I enjoy a really wide variety of music, from "oldies" to opera and a lot of stuff in between. I'm a photographer and an amateur web graphics designer. Finally, while I view my computer as a fascinating and entertaining tool (obviously, or I wouldn't be here), I'm a writer who still enjoys writing my drafts in longhand first.

I've been thinking a lot recently about humans' lack of tolerance for one another. This was brought home to me recently when I found out that someone close to me has been non-supportive of my spiritual views; he has been asking his spiritual advisor to "pray that she might be saved."

It has also been brought home to me based on the trials suffered by a Sister of mine online, who has been criticized for having the courage of her convictions.

I think it is tremendously short-sighted and sad that we as human beings, who have been gifted with the ability to reason and understand our emotions should have so little acceptance for the beliefs of one another. You see it in many aspects of daily life today. Non-smokers versus smokers; "pro-lifers" versus "pro choicers," pro-gay and anti-gay activists. The list goes on and on, and nowhere is it more virulent than in some religions and spiritual ideologies. In other parts of the world, people kill one another for no other reason than "he says different prayers than me." There is our tendency to believe that someone who has differing spiritual beliefs is a second-class citizen. This is abhorrent to me.

I have understood from the beginning of my spiritual journey that my path is not appropriate for everyone, but my way teaches tolerance. We must respect each man's spiritual life, regardless of the road he walks to his Creator. We owe respect to the person who takes responsibility and who does the right thing, regardless of the proverbial slings and arrows thrown at her by the rest of the world.

Judgement, when used properly, is a valuable tool for humans -- it helps us to delineate proper food to eat, safe places into which to place ourselves, and proper methods for raising our children. Too many in today's society use the tool of judgement to diminish others. People who are "different" are "judged" as lesser individuals. Because we as humans are appallingly resistant to any kind of change, people who take action and change things are judged again as "troublemakers." Perhaps the worst of all is that when they see us in action, individuals who judge us also feel an overwhelming desire to re-mold us into something they consider to be within the current societal norm.

I know that there is a higher law of right and wrong, and I learned early on from one of my animal totems that sometimes, when I do right or say what is honest and true, I will be like a "voice crying in the wilderness" because it is not currently accepted. I will be viewed as wierd; I may be ridiculed or treated with condescension and disrespect; I may be criticized; others may try to sway my faith in the road I walk towards something that suits THEIR belief system or way of life. It can be, and will be, an occasionally lonely road for me.

For others in similar positions, I can only say the spiritual truth I know. My faith came at the right time in my life and brought me peace. I had been searching for inner peace all my life, and when it finally came to me, it was the most precious gift I could receive -- more important than material goods and more important than the opinions of others. My faith today is IRREVOCABLE. No one can take it away from me, no matter what names they call me. I KNOW today that I am valued by my Creator and all other spirits of life in this world. I know today I am a part in everything else, and that all other life is a part of me. Whether I use that knowledge for good or for ill is my choice. I can be part of the solution, physically and spiritually, or I can be part of the problem. Today, I do not have to rely on the good opinions of other people to feel peace. I know I am on the right path, and even if all humanity treats me badly, I know my Creator will be pleased if I do what I KNOW in my heart is right and good.

To all those suffering from the "outsider syndrome," as I call it, I suggest you examine your faith and look honestly at both yourself and the ills of the world. If your spirituality brings you PEACE, that most elusive of treasures, do not let anyone talk you out of giving it up for a so-called "better way." If you are at peace in your soul, you have already found that "better way" that works for you. Hold it close, nurture it, and protect it. Have courage to face the moments when you are alone. Thank the Creator for the friends you are given who support you in the road you walk, and take good care of those friends.

To all those who seek to change us because we are "different," please understand this. We do not seek to change the road you walk -- only through individual choice can YOU do that. I do not force my beliefs down the throats of others. In fact, I rarely publicly speak about them unless I am asked. I do not need to broadcast what I believe in order to keep it strong. Consider walking in the shoes of those you diminish. If you are a Catholic or Baptist, consider how you feel when you walk down the street and, say, a Jehovah's Witness buttonholes you and tries to talk you into his way of thinking. Don't you find it offensive to be told that YOU'RE misguided? That's how someone walking the Red Road feels when you try "saving" him or her. If you're a Jehovah's Witness, would YOU appreciate it if a Baptist followed you home and insisted you had to go to his church to get to heaven? If you're a Jew, how do you feel if you meet a Muslim who tells you that you're going to hell because Allah is the only way to paradise? And I bet a Muslim doesn't feel too great if he meets a Jew who insists that "I'm one of the Chosen people," and you're not gonna get to heaven because they're won't be space for you.

Do you see an experience in the paragraph that rings a bell for you? Consider that the next time YOU judge someone else. True faith does not require an argument. When I meet someone who tells me any of the above, I just smile at them, congratulate them on their happiness, and tell them I am happy and at peace with what I know. Then I walk on.....

Think a little bit about tolerance today. Do you shake your head at the ills of the world, and the uncivility of mankind? How have YOU contributed today to lessening those ills? How have YOU contributed to the intolerance abroad in the world? Think about it for a while...try a little tolerance toward your fellow human....if you run across someone who believes differently from you, but who is a happy soul and not doing harm, STOP judging for a minute. Instead of shaking your head and thinking they're odd, try being grateful that there is one more joyous, smiling soul in the world trying to do their tiny bit of good. Try it for a week.....it might make you feel better yourself!

Mitakuye oyasin (we are all related).....be well and walk in beauty and peace.

Wind Chimes...Aluminum Tubes.....© 1997,Marty Fancher/KeyTrax Productions Inc.