Note: I started writing this story almost a year and a half ago. Even though that’s not such a long time, I really have changed since I started it. If I were to do it again now, it would probably be different. Not necessarily better, just different. I was almost a little afraid to re-read it because I knew I wouldn’t feel the same way about it as when I started. This may not mean anything to you, but I’m just trying to say that if it seems sort of fantastical and immature, that’s why.

A Lesson in Something That’s Not Quite Love

Chapter 1

“God, what the hell was I thinking?” wondered Hermione. “Why wasn’t I just paying attention today? Now I’m stuck in detention… with Malfoy? Ugh, I know what I was thinking about. Ron. Yep, Ron. And how we almost had sex last night but I ran away scared from him. And then he broke up with me. Why did he break up with me?” Hermione adjusted the strap of her white tank top. God, this room was so insanely hot. Couldn’t Snape just have opened a window? She’d already removed her uniform shirt and was just in a tank top, but she still had on her navy skirt and socks and shoes.



Hermione continued to wash out the bottle she was currently working on. Her and Malfoy’s detention had been to clean every one of Snape’s empty potion bottles. Something like two hundred of them, if her calculations had been correct. Some of her frizzy hair slid out of her bun and into her eyes. God, it was so hot in here.

“How did I get stuck in a four hour detention with him?” Hermione thought miserably. As if this hadn’t been the worst weekend of her life. Failing that transfiguration exam, that whole thing with Ron, and now this? She closed her eyes, thinking back. Ron had been so sweet, so nice and understanding with her. And she had been all ready to sleep with him, but somewhere along the way she just realized that she knew absolutely nothing about what she was going to do. She had no idea how to please a guy.

“Despite all my Cosmopolitan reading, it’s not much help unless you’ve tried it out on someone.” She thought. Hermione closed her eyes. The strap of her bra slid down her shoulder and she quickly swept it back under her shirt. She closed her eyes and tried to remember all the details of her misadventure with Ron, wondering if she’d made the right decision.

“Of course it’s not the right idea to run out on a guy when you’re both naked in his bed.” Hermione leaned her head on her knees. “I just need some rest.” Hermione closed her eyes for just a minute….

SPLOSH- “OW!” she cried. Draco had thrown his sponge at her, and it hit her right in the stomach.

“Asshole.” She said, throwing it back. “What the fuck is your problem, Malfoy?”

“You were slacking, Granger. I really need to get out of here. I’ve got more pressing things waiting in my bedroom for me.” Draco replied.

“Jackass.” She mumbled. Hermione continued to wash her bottles, scrubbing them to get her frustrations out.

“God.” Draco said. “I didn’t realize what a bitch you were.” Hermione ignored him, and once more picked up her falling bra strap. “What the hell is wrong with you today?” he asked.

“What the hell do you care?” she asked.

“See, this is what I’m talking about. Total bitch.” He said.

“Why would you care what’s wrong with me?” she asked.

“Because I’m genuinely concerned about your overall well-being.” He said sarcastically. “I just figured if you’re not in a pissy mood we’ll get out of here faster.” Instead of replying, Hermione chose to head over to the wall and open the window.

“I don’t like being stuck here with you. You don’t like being stuck here with me.” Hermione said. “Let’s just clean these stupid bottles and get out of here.” She said, heading back to the table she’d been working on. “OW!” she cried again as she felt Malfoy’s hand strike her butt.

“What the fuck was that?” she asked.

“Just what I thought.” He said.

“Just what you thought what?” Hermione demanded. “Why are you such an idiot?” she yelled at him. Malfoy just smiled and shook his head. Hermione sat down, her back to Malfoy. She suddenly started as she felt a hand on the bare part of her back.

“Problems in the bedroom with that sweet little boyfriend of yours?”

“Like I’d ever share any detail of my personal life with you.” Hermione said.

“Oh, but you might want to.” He said.

“Malfoy, just please go back to cleaning your bottles. I really just want to get out of here.” He walked around her and sat across the table from her.

“Did you and Ron have sex?” he asked. Hermione started at him.

“You’re disgusting.” She said. “Please just get back to work.” He picked up her bucket and moved it to the side.

“Because I don’t think you slept with him.” He said.

“Did I ask for your opinion?” she asked. “You are such a fucking idiot.”

“I think I know exactly what your problem is, Granger.” He said.

“I’m sure you do, Malfoy. Could you wash some fucking bottles? We’ve got a lot of work to do.”

“You’re so angry… Could it be sexual frustration?” he leaned over the table to whisper in her ear. She looked up and glared at him.

“No, it’s not actually.” She replied.

“Really?” he asked. “By the way you reacted to me touching your ass, I’d say you’re pretty afraid of sex, actually.”

“Why do you even care about my problems?” she asked. “Besides, I’m just angry that I have detention. It’s been a bad weekend, and I’d like to forget it, okay? So let’s just finish this, and I can get back to my room and go to sleep and try to put almost sleeping with Ron out of my mind-” Hermione realized what had just slipped from her mouth and groaned. “Shit!” she thought.

“So I was right?” Draco asked. “Everything not storybook perfect with you and Mr. Weasley?”

“Bite me.” She said.

“So you almost slept with him, huh?” Draco asked.

“How long will it take you to realize I’m not going to respond to your immature comments?” she asked, pulling her bucket back and reaching for her bottles again. Draco immediately pushed it aside.

“I don’t really take no for an answer.” He said.

“Okay, Malfoy. Yes, I almost slept with Ron. But it didn’t happen. I don’t know if you’re familiar with this, but some people like to wait for the right moment to have sex. It’s not something I’m expecting you to understand, but I hope you’ll shut up now.” She made an attempt to return to her work, but Malfoy grabbed her arm.

“So, why didn’t you sleep with him?” he asked.

“Um, like I’d tell you. We’re not exactly close friends or anything.” She said.

“Come on, Granger. There might be some way I can help you out.”

“It’s not a problem. Ron broke up with me because he knew I wasn’t ready to sleep with him and he didn’t trust himself to stay away from me. He didn’t want me to feel pressured, so he said we should take a break. That’s what’s on my mind, that’s the big problem. That’s why I can’t concentrate. So know that you know, please leave me alone and get back to cleaning.” She said to Draco.

“So you and Weasley aren’t dating anymore?” he asked.

“No, not right now.” She said. “Why? Were you thinking of asking me out?” she asked sarcastically. Malfoy stifled a laugh.

“No, I was just thinking about something.”

“I’ll alert the media.” She replied.

“No, I mean… Granger, you know I really kind of hate you. I know you really kind of hate me. But I think we could help each other out here.”

“What are you talking about?” she asked.

“Look. Just listen to me.” He said, pulling her hands away from her work. “My father told me I had to start learning how to make my own money. So I have to pay for all my expenses for the next couple of months.”

“Malfoy, I cannot tell you how special that is, but how does it concern me?”

“It concerns you…” he said, “because I know how I can make the money I need.”

“I’m not paying you anything, Malfoy, so you can just forget that idea.” She said.

“You might just want to hear this idea.” He said. “Despite all the crap you just fed me about it not being the right moment or whatever, I know what you really need.” He said.

“Oh, and what’s that?” she asked.

“And education.” He replied.

“And what does it look like I’m getting at this school?” she asked.

“No, I was thinking of a different type of education.”

“And…” Hermione said.

“More like, sex education.” He said.

“What?” she asked, her eyes growing wide.

“It’s obvious, Granger, that while you may just not have been ready to have sex with Ron, you were also worried that you wouldn’t know what the hell you were doing.”

“What makes you think that?” she asked.

“Jesus, you’re Hermione Granger, studious, virtuous.”

“And you’re Draco Malfoy, you slack off and sleep around. What the hell does it matter?”

“It matters because we can solve each others problems.” He said.

“What?” she asked.

“I need money. My father’s cutting me off as a life experience or some shit like that. You need help learning how to please a guy. You pay me, I’ll show you what to do.”

“Malfoy, I am not going to make you my whore!” Hermione cried.

“Don’t think of it that way. I wouldn’t be your whore. Come on, Granger. I know what guys like, obviously. You have no clue what guys like. I need money. You have money. We can help each other.”

“I don’t know about this.” She said.

“Come on, it’s not like I’d tell anyone. We’ll just try it out, okay?” he said.

“Malfoy, why are you doing this? I know it’s for your personal gain, but it almost seems like you care about me.”

“Not exactly.” He said. “Just think of it as us doing each other a mutual favor. I don’t want you sexually or anything. I really just need money, and hey, it’s doing something I’m good at.” He leaned over and slid her fallen bra strap inside her shirt once more.

Hermione shivered slightly at his touch. She was hesitant for a moment. “Okay. We’ll try it out.” She said finally. “But you cannot tell anyone, ever. And let’s make sure that no matter what happens, we always hate each other. I’m just helping you, you’re just helping me. They cancel each other out. We don’t owe each other anything. Nothing between us changes, okay?”

“Deal.” Draco said. How about we meet in the empty classroom on the third floor, past the picture of the mermaid and the horses, say, next Saturday?”

“Sounds good.” Hermione said. “Should I uh, bring anything?’ she asked.

“Just your money.” Draco replied.

“Okay, I’ll see you next week, then.” Hermione said.

“Next week.” Said Draco.

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Well, that’s it. I have 12 other chapters so far, but I’ll see if anyone reads this one first.