Old Deuteronomy -

You've heard of several kinds of Cat,

And my opinion now is that

You should need no interpreter

To understand our character.

You've learned enough to take the view

That cats are very much like you

You've seen us both at work and games,

And learnt about our proper names,

Our habits and our habitat:

But

HOW WOULD YOU AD-DRESS A CAT?

So first, your memory I'll jog,

And say: A CAT IS NOT A DOG.

All -

So first, your memory I'll jog,

And say: A CAT IS NOT A DOG.

(Old Deuteronomy -

Now Dogs pretend they like to fight;

They often bark, more seldom bite;

But yet a Dog is, on the whole,

What you would call a simple soul.

The usual Dog about the Town

Is much inclined to play the clown,

And far from showing too much pride

Is frequently undignified.

He's such an easy-going lout,

He'll answer any hail or shout.

All -

The usual Dog about the Town

Is much inclined to play the clown

Again I must remind you that

A Dog's a Dog

A CAT'S A CAT)

Old Deuteronomy -

With Cats, some say, one rule is true:

DON'T SPEAK 'TIL YOU ARE SPOKEN TO.

Myself, I do not hold with that -

I say, you should ad-dress a Cat.

But always keep in mind that he

Resents familiarity.

You bow, and taking off your hat,

Ad-dress him in this form: O CAT!

Before a Cat will condescend

To treat you as a trusted friend,

Some little token of esteem

Is needed, like a dish of cream;

And you might now and then supply

Some caviare, or Strassburg Pie,

Some potted grouse or salmon paste-

He's sure to have his personal taste.

And so in time you reach your aim,

And call him by his NAME.

All -

A Cat's entitled to expect

These evidences of respect.

So this is this and that is that

And there's how you AD-DRESS A CAT.

A Cat's entitled to expect

These evidences of respect.

So this is this and that is that

And there's how you AD-DRESS A CAT.