Hola and good night.
Silly Story 60
A Day with Guy the Nature Guy
Look. Here come the happy prancing deer now. See them leap. See them prance. See the drink from the fresh stream. Oh no! Look out little deer there is hunter hiding in that bush! What is the matter with you! Run Run RUUUUUUUUUUUUN! You damn deaf stupid little deer!!! Now look they shot your friend Susie. Oh now what. Are you going to just sit there and cry like a pansy? Oh your not? I see.
See the deer march his way across the highway. See the dear get hit by a truck. Look at the damage done to that truck. Hear the man behind the wheel curse. See the deer steal the truck. Good buck. See the deer drive to a hunting store and purchase a gun. What deer? You have no cash? Oh. See the deer steal the gun. See the deer drive back to the woods. See the deer double park. Deer what are you doing? Oh you are hiding? But why in the back of that truck? Oh I see, you're going to pretend to be dead dear. Yes yes the smashed berries look like a wound....
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Oh I'm sorry I fell a sleep waiting- What is this?? Deer why are you getting drunk and partying with those hunters? Oh they didn't really shoot Susie? Where is she? Oh yes I see her, she's throwing up behind the trash can? Too much whisky you say? I see. But why would a deer party with hunters?
Why should I look at he calendar? Oh I see hunting season is over! So your friends till next time. Yes I'm well aware you are keeping the gun. No no I don't drink. Nah really, I'm fine. Well I guess things are going good here.
Oh what is this? Two happy little rabbits hopping through the weeds...wait...what are they? Why is he mounting her? Oh I see, let's zoom in kiddies to get a better look at this act of nature. Wait. Did he just flick me off? Get a room you filthy little beast! Yeah yeah shake your cotton fluff else were you little-
Oh what's that Bob the camera man?Oh we're out of time. What a shame. Well until next time kiddies have fun and remember nature is your friend.
The End
Moral: Hump in the weeds and everyone will see, steal a gun and run and no one cares.
Responses:
Hola, So here I am sitting in computer class waiting for my teacher to hopefully NOT show up...teehee! Anyway, I LOVED this story it was high rate! We need more stories with commentary like this. Maybe with Susie...I was very amused, Meggy you may have a gold star AND a cookie for this one. This ranks number two only behind that one story...what was it...ahhh, too earlier to think, you know what I'm talking about...*kisses* byeeee Courtney the hopefully not in class soon
hahaha filthy little beast. I think guy the nature guy should be telling this story while naked! I think it would be realllly funny!!! This story is very amusing meggy! I agree with courtney, but ill add another gold star, and a chocolate chip cookie! Marla the magnificent
Honey don't ever become in charge of programing for any station. Promise me right now that was a very scary show although funny very funny still scary!!!! Jason
Hello All- I'm chilling in the computer lab. I hope everyone is having a good day. I'm doing alright. About this story...hmmm...interesting. I'm not sure what to think. Good job none the less Meagan. Have a lovely day all!! Love Always, Lisa :)
61 ah ha ha ah
sorry, I've been buried under a term paper.... still am + 3 Media papers... and a speech... It's very stuffy up in here. OH! Guess what every one My family is moving!. Since I still live with them and am so completely broke I get to go with them! :) We close next month, but won't be moving until this summer. yay. Any way, The basement is set up quite nicely for parties and what not, not to mention my huge yard. So yay again. Anyway see you all
Silly story 61
See BIll Run
See the invisible grave yard -->
See Bill (who is invisible) peek out from behind that invisible grave stone -->
Hear Bill snicker, everyone thinks he is dead
See Bill burn his escape plans-->
See Bill run-->
Bill is a fugitive.
See invisible police eating dounuts -->
See Bill run very fast -->
See police see Bill. -->
See police run after Bill -->
See Bill run into invisible Jill -->
See invisible little red hearts form over Bill and Jill -->
See Bill and Jill run -->
See Bill and Jill strip off their clothing to distract cops -->
See nearby old woman faint -->
See Jill trip on fainted woman -->
See Bill turn around to save Jill -->
See police get closer-->
See Bill and Jill streak through the open weeds-->
See police get confused and trip over fainted lady -->
See invisible lady wake up and feel offended -->
See invisible lady beat cops with purse-->
See Bill and Jill hop invisible plane to Italy-->
See Bill tell Jill his past -->
See Jill tell Bill her past -->
See Bill faint -->
See Jill wake up Bill -->
See Bill and Jill- Wait no look away look away don't see that!!!
See Bill and Jill begin life of crime in Italy-->
See that Bill and Jill will have more stories -->
See The End
Moral: If your ever in trouble, take your clothes off and steal a plane.
Responses:
Hola, I'm such a fan of these stories!! I want more on Bill and Jill! woohoo And yeah I'm also anti-papers *kisses* byeeee Courtney who is actually started on her english paper before the day it is due
I will have to remember tha moral I'm not in trouble that often, but it is good to be ready in an emergency Danny
Hi All- Interesting story Meagan!! I remember the "streaking through the open weeds" from days gone by. Good job on bringing back old memories. I'll remember the moral if I ever turn to a life of crime. (Yeah right) Oh well. I finally got my grade for the History midterm that I took back at the beginning of the month. I got a 96%!!! Since there are only two tests in that class, the next being the final, I'm pretty proud. I will soon be buried underneath two term papers. One will be for history and the other for my english class. It's hard to believe that there are only 6 weeks of classes left before the end of school. On the roommate front: Nothing to report on Gretchen. I never see her- not that I'm complaing about that!!! :) Karlene and I are getting along better than we have in the past. Janelle is well, just Janelle. She left last Saturday to go home for the weekend, and came back after about an hour after she left to pick up a forgotten "Days of Our Lives" tape. I thought that was a little ridiculous. Oh well. She's just odd, nothing more, nothing less. Talk to you all later!!! I'm looking forward to coming home and seeing everybody again. Love Always, Lisa :)
YAY for bill and jill!! I really like stories that are in this format, they are fun! and as for streaking through open weeds,, its definetly a must! meggy, where ya moving too?? :*:* Marla the wonderful
Okay so I have a math quiz in a few minutes. I studied but i still think I may be in trouble so I should take of my close and hop on a plane got you thanks I'll send everyone a postcard! Love yeah Jay
I've always supported the invisible streaker movement in America. There's no harm in it. Besides, he got the girl. What's not to like? -Kyla
62 stories ah ha ha
he he he he There's a new picture up finally... yea I know I know I left pinky's ass up there for a while, give a break.. Courtney don't worry, it's not too bad... http://www.angelfire.com/la3/nightengale8402/index.html
Silly Story 62
The Term Paper Revolt
There once were little term papers that had to be done.
They required a lot more work and time than they were worth or should.
Many people were mad at the little term papers. The term papers would cry that it wasn't their fault. But it was.
One day while many students were huddled in the library all working on different versions of their paper for English and history and foot fungus all the little term papers stood up and popped out of screen and declared they were going on strike.
"We are tired of being despised!" they said.
At first the students were happy, but then it hit them without this term paper they would fail! Again they began attacking the papers.
one of the paper bravely stood up amongt the whole mess and shouted that it was their teachers fault that they were complicated and required!
The students thought about this, decided the paper was right, but they couldn't beat up their teachers...so they continued to take it out on the term papers.
This went on for quite some time until the term papers, flew out of the room and began paper cutting teachers until they all decided not to assign term papers any longer.
It was a joyous joyous day on college campuses everywhere.
To make up the grade, student ate chocolate instead and wrote a short and sweet one paragraph about how good it taste.
The End
The Moral: When a Term Paper starts talking to you, listen. You never know what may come.
REsponses: Hi Everyone-
Meagan, I LOVE THIS STORY!!! It was awesome. Good job. It would be nice if
students could unite with term papers and stage a revolt. What a wonderful
world.
Later everyone!!!
Love Always,
Lisa :)
dont know about everyone else (since none of you respond!!) but I liked this story! I think it has a good moral, and its definetly "in season" with the whole term paper fling at school. I have this hideous subject that i can find nothing on. I hate english, I always have, I always will. I really dont find term papers that hard or annoying, but when you cant find sources, thats a pain in the ass, especially when you need 5 books and 5 internet. UGH. Well i need to go now. Good luck to all.
Marla the Wonderful
Hola,
I HATE PAPERS. I think ours need to go on strike! And that picture is way bad! What you were thinking. It looks like there's something in my mouth, or there could be, or it could be my computer. Anywho, more typeing to do for the evil paper...*kisses*
Courtney the I should be working on my paper right now
Meagan,
You need, very baddly, to get out from in front of the term paper. Go out side the...well i i skind'a sunny right now, well...being out side will do you some good. ok, i just noticed that it went to italix, anywho, take a break huh?!?
Danny if my term paper starts talking to me I think I will shit a brick but beyond that I think you get some crunches form when you wrote Jason
63 is in the house "The Term Paper Revolt" is a beacon of hope for me. I love literature, but I hate having to write papers about it. Instead of giving up my firstborn child to the devil in exchange for no more papers, I now hope and pray for a term paper revolt at Bradley.
-Kyla
hello hello
I enjoyed myself this weekend. Yes for me. Well I gotta hit the books again tomorrow. Lets see I have a story to plan and an interview to get OH yes! I have to think of an informative speech for Tuesday (someone please strike me down!) Let's see let's see...two paragraphs about my paper, the paper wasn't enough now I have to tell him what I think of it! I haven't even read it! let's think let's think Jason needs to help me with tutorial 3... I need to get a job... hmmm I need to shop for a few things... Damn, and I spent my day off doing end of year filing...
Silly Story 63
Turtle Luck
Timmy is a little sea turtle who likes to swim and play in the ocean with all of his little sea turtle friends. Timmy always listens to his mommy and never goes out too far.
This wasn't always true of Timmy however...
One day about a year ago, Timmy went out farther than his mommy told him to. All his friends told him it was a bad idea, but Timmy didn't listen. His friends promised not to tell on him, but only if he returned before sunset. SO off Timmy swam into the dark dank ocean, farter away from the island his clan circled than he had ever been before. A little deeper to. It was getting a little dark and despite himself, Timmy was getting frightened.
Then suddenly something grabbed Timmy from behind and pulled him waaaaaaaaaay deeper and waaaaaaaaaaaaaay farther than he had ever intended on going. He saw a bright light ahead of him and was sure that he was doomed. But as he felt himself get closer he realized it was a glowing city. A city full of mermaids! Timmy almost passed out in the arms of his capturer. He finally got the gall to look at who was holding him. It was a mermaid! (Surprise surprise) Te mermaid was paying no attention and swam down to a group of mermaids waiting for her.
All of the awaiting mermaids gasped. "That's not out Finnball!" one shouted. The mermaid carrying Timmy looked down and gasped also and then dropped him. Timmy flapped his little flippers. For a moment everyone was frantic. Then a Timmy spoke. "Mermaids don't exist!" he shouted. They all shirked. Then one replied "Turtles can't talk!" They spent the next hour explaining how wrong everyone was.
Over the hour of shouting and accusing, and inspecting Timmy's shell to make sure he wasn't magical (this consisted of using him as a Finnball and Timmy wasn't sure that it was procedure for testing magical shells) They found they actually quite liked eachother. So Timmy spent the rest of his time playing with the mermaids (and later mermen) and sharing information. As Timmy was leaving he even found the mermaid's lost Finnball.
So why is it that Timmy is so obedient now and never strays? Well, quite simply mermaids don't want anyone to know they exist. so Timmy cut a deal, he wouldn't tell anyone of their existence and they would give him any treasure they found in sunken ships. It was a healthy relationship. Timmy eventual had enough treasure to open a little turtle casino and was the richest turtle around (since all the other turtles had to take out loans to play).
Many were suspicious of Timmy's sudden wealth and the sudden need for a currency system among turtles... but shrugged it off. They all thought it was lucky.
Of course the first day Timmy got back all his friends wanted to know what happened. Timmy said he was attacked by sharks, but that he beat them off. his friends spread the story so Timmy was a hero also. Everyone ignored the fact that he was first disobedient and had to be a hero for his own hide. Then again no one payed attention to the fact that the story was a lie...
Did I mention Timmy leads a very happy life?
The End
Moral: Swim farther than any, get kicked around real good, make a few bribes, and you will be set for life.
REsponses: got swim far kick you in the ass and bribe you with sex and I'll be rich okay now I'll see you in 1hr and 55 mins still loving you jason!! Greetings All-
I really enjoyed this story Meagan!!!! It's nice to know the secrets of
success. Good job!!!
I hope that you all have a lovely day!! The weather here in Macomb is beautiful
today!!! That means that the dorms are going to be hotter than heck for the
next couple of days. Oh well.
Good luck with any papers, tests, assignments that you all have!!!
Love Always,
Lisa :)
lol! I liked the moral, it was fun! I thought that this story was very amusing and its different than anything youve written about before meggy, magnificent! I think in the future we should have more stories about mermaids and magical things :) maybe a deserted tropical island that i get stranded on with about 3 hot guys,,,,,yes!! lets have a marla fantasy story! get to work meggy! I think we should have fantasy stories about everyone,, but lets keep them pg13 people,, and in these stories, nudity is NOT rated PG13. Jerks.
Marla the glorious, magnificent, wonderful, and damn fun
Excellent idea, Marla. More magical creatures, especially mermaids. I also
think that we need to have more stories written about all of us. These stories
should all be very flattering of course. We should all end up with hot guys. ha.
Love Always,
Lisa :)
I Do believe I speak for the whole community of guys who read meagan's silly stories when i say Not all of us want to end up with hot guys!!!!!!!!
Sincerly
Jason the very confused
Hola,
LOL, Jason stop lieing to yourself you know you want a hot guy, and so do all the other guys....maybe you all should get together!!! aww so cute
Courtney the matchmaker Courtney I am hot guy enough for myself I don't need any one else damn it!!!!!
Jason the one who doesn't need a matchmaker!
:( knock it off you losers!
Marla the disgusted
Yes Master Marla Jason will be good slave and do as he's told master Marla. I am much sorrys master marla. Jason
Good job pinky - Jason I'm glad you figured out where you stand in the world! :)
Courtney the pinky supporter Get it right it is masta....not master...masta sir..:D
six footer..:D I find this all very amusing. Kudos to Marla, Courtney, and Jason who made me
laugh today.
Love Always,
Lisa :)
64?? yeah that's right
well I meant to write this story a little while ago, but it got cold. I got the idea in crit thinking class and was inspired by a card I made for Sarah.
SS64
72 Degrees With the afternoon sun high in the sky the earth reached the mystical temperature of 72 degrees. What is so mystical about 72 degrees you ask? Well, that;s right you wouldn't know. After all you are only human. When it is 72 degrees out side (and everywhere that it is 72 degrees) little flying cows come out and play. At any other temperature they feel the need to sleep. Tiny flying cows hibernate in flower beds at any other temperature (okay okay they are generally awake between the degrees of 70 to 75) However 72 degrees are when they are their lively-est.
Most likely you have seen a tiny flying cow. They look like big cows only they have light transparent wings. You probably mistook them for a fly or a bee.
Tiny flying cows love to sniff pretty flowers and play around all day. They eat very little (seeing as how they sleep a lot around here) But when they do eat, they enjoy fruits. Watermelon is their favorite, but they seldom get to enjoy it. So they usually eat grass, as so not to strand too far away from the flowers. you see they can never really tell when the temp will change. When it does they get sleepy and fall from the sky. Don't worry, they bounce. They are safest sleeping in the flowers. So they often eat grass.
Tiny flying cows just happen to be lucky, sure they waste all their awake time nibbling grass, joking around, having short and tantalizing love affairs and sniffing flowers But they do have other purposes. They occasionally and accidentally help bees pollinate. And they are lucky. If a flock of tiny flying cows is living in your flowers out side your living area you will be lucky. It is Tiny luck of course (they can only do so much!) You may find a penny on the ground or a $50 dollar bill at the gas station. (Yes, Jason your mom has tiny flying cows. They like her. This is why she finds money all the time.) You may also just find your shoe or walk into a tree. Tiny cows do have a sense of humor.
Last but not least. Do not try to trap tiny flying cows in a temperature controlled cage and suck up their luck. While they don't fly far from the flowers they like knowing they can. So they will get made is contained in any way. Also they like all the sleep they get and you would probably keep them up to long. They would only love you for your fruit for so long. In fact, they will get so mad they will die just to spite you.Which will inturn make you very unlucky.
So the next time you hear a buzzing in your ear, don't be so quick to show it away (especially if you are by flowers) It may not be a "buzzzzz" but a "mooo" and a tiny flying cow wishing you a pleasant 72 degrees.
The End
Moral: Cows only love you for your fruit so long, and then you will run into a tree. responses: LOVE COWS!!!!! yay for little flying cows, and yay for 72 degrees! I thought the moral was very cute :) i got to see baby cows a few summers ago,, they are SO cute, but not very smart :( awww poor babies.
Well, i must go now, but keep up the darn good work on these stories.
Marla the joyous wow that explains so much like why my mom likes cows so damn much!! Good story not bad it was diffrent Jason
"72 Degree" is another fun story. I wish I would have read it sooner though. I've been having horrible luck lately. I guess those weren't droves of ladybugs I was killing in my room after all. Damn.
-Kyla Will you get me a little cow for x-mas!! I promise to take care of it! Good job
CDR
65 65 65 65 65 65 65
YAY! Okay, now 3 cds are done. Everyone say "yay" good. They are the sexy, tropical, and sad. So next I need you all to send me songs that make you happy and that make you want to laugh. Please specify which is which.
Thanks
Silly Sotyre afadsfs 65
Apral Full
April Fool's Day is named for the biggest fool of all but no one would know it. They all think it is just time to make fun of friends and the great fools in the world, like Bobby Shitcomb who tried to cure blindness by locking people in closets. But this story is about the one who started it all Apral Full.
Apral Full was a great fool who did many stupid things. But the biggest thing was when she tried to start her own country. She floated out to sea on April first in a cardboard box and holding a flag. She declared her box her country and April First, Apral Full's Day.
Of course her box sank. And of course she died. Her body, box, and flag floated onto a small unclaimed island. The natives thought she was a very important person who had died at sea. They built her a big tomb and renamed themselves Apral Full's Tribe (They got the name from the flag).
Unfortunately the tribe took on Apral's bad sense of judgment. They were very stupid and did very stupid things. They lost over 50 tribe members to the "Tame the Sharks" project.They spent years trying to peal coconuts by hitting themselves in the heads with them.
Years and years later the island and the tribe was discovered. The captain who found them was Irish. On April first he had gotten permission to claim the island. It was also the day he feel over board. He couldn't swim. He was saved by a Full who was trying to race the boat. The captain was so grateful he named the day (April 1st) Apral Full's day. Years later the name of the island and the islanders changed.
However, Someone who use live on the island found their self in the new founded country of America. He became good friends with the president of the time and told him of the Holiday. The president was able to declare April First Apral Full's day in America. A year later the president went to visit the island. He found the natives were very very foolish. He was ashamed for naming a day after such stupid people that he began using the holiday to make fun of foolish and gullible people. And as if it mattered he changed the name from "Apral Full's Day" to "April Fool's Day."
Hence then tradition has been carried on for ages and ages. It gives us a reason to be rude.
The End
Moral: He who believes this story should move to the island, Apral Fulls. Responses: very good I like the moral of this one alot!!! But just so you know april fools day is not a fedral holiday or else you'd get school of for it! as far as the songs are conserened yay!!! I want copies!!!!! I also would like to suggest for the happy cd-Bang on the drum all day-I don't know, don't worry be happy -I don''t know,i got my mind set on you-George Harrison. For the funny song I have a question is rondney carrington okay or do you want real songs? If you want real songs I recommened-Ol red, you can call me al, were you born an asshole, and your ass and a hole in the ground. Love you dear bye Jason
Yeah so I had a trick for yesterday all planned but me and my sneaky friend couldn't get together so there was no apral full for us
CDR Hola!
Geez everyone got sooooo caught up in the Turtle Luck War they forgot to reply to the other stories. Marla even forgot to reply to Apral Full. *faint* But a good thing happened Peter came out of dormant and replied!!! Yay. He's up to ten now. Trust me there are other much much worse off. Well, let's see what my brain comes up with today. Oh yeah the pic is also changed.
http://www.angelfire.com/la3/nightengale8402/index.html
It's of me so I'm not going to make a big deal about it...
Anyway on with the show
Silly story 66
Nature Guy's Safari
Hello everyone, I'm Guy the Nature guy. Today we are going on an African safari. Aren't you excited? I know I am. Me and camera man Bob will be surveying the land and looking at all sorts of interesting creatures. So come along with us while we enjoy this beautiful - Oh look! Here some elephants now. What's that Bob? Oh you are right, those are Rhinos. Well come along let;s see if we can get a closer look at those wonderful creatures...
(whispering) I must be very quiet. We are only feet away from that immensely large Rhino. watch as he grazes peacefully in the Savanna (or what ever you call this). Isn't he a beautiful creature? Oh would you look he's heard something. Wonder why he;s looking over here... No Mr.Rhino there's no one spying on you in this bush... What's that? Oh! I'm so sorry that's MRS. Rhino... Why are you scuffing your feet? Oh my dear heavens!!! Run Bob Run!!!
We are now- huff huff- running-huff huff- from a very fast rhino--huff huff huff-- God I didn't know a creature that Fat could run so--- WHAT! No MRS. Rhino I didn't mean Fat I meant uh uh PHat you know AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
.
I am sorry gentle viewers for the disconnection. Camera man Bob was almost trampled by that Rhino. But it's okay he fooled her. He jumped off that cliff I am very sure he saw...Bob had to be flown to the hospital. So while we were flying Bob out, I flew in his twin brother and temporary replacement Bub. So off we go.
We're going to start off with some more smaller creatures. So me and Bub have found a tree full of friendly little monkeys. Look how they chatter amongst one another. Look was the cute little fellas swing from branch to branch. Watch how they... pick their little butts... Ok umm right. Well they are interesting little (PLOP) What the!!! What is this disgusting substance that that monkey just flung at me? what is that monkey? It's your what!!! No I do not think that flinging poop at me is humorous. I find it disgust-(PLOP) Ewww. Bub! Stop laughing. You're taking the monkey's side. Are too! That's it I have had quite enough of this (PLOP) WE are leaving. I'll show you little monkeys. There went your chance for 15 minutes of fame! Hey! Why are you all running? You can't run from me, I'm suppose to leave you? Hey Bub where are YOU going? What do you mean the Rhino found....me?!?!?!?! (turns slowly) Oh dear balls of monkey poop she's back for more!!!!
Good viewers I am afraid that we must cut today's program a little short. huff hufff- Oh wait Bub? Where are you going? Bub! Oh I see you're doing what Bob did good idea! I'm right behind you huff huff Good day gentle viewers huff huff huff... Until next time this is Guy huff huff The Nature Guy saying AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH...........
The End
The Moral: It is wise for he who is covered in monkey poop to jump off cliffs.
Responses: this is the funniest damn thing ever. I laughed myself to bits, which isnt good because I have a headache from laughing too hard ealier!!! I swear everyone should have been at lunch today. good times!!!!! UGH! Well, i need to go, but this story reminded me of that one dude, the austrailan guy,, im having issues thinking right now! Good job meggypoo :*
Marla the damn impressed Hello All-
I would just like to say for the record that I did respond back to the April
Fools story, Meagan. Anyway...Wow, what an funny story. I would not like to be
in that fearless reporter's shoes. Gross. Very well written, good job.
Four weeks and counting until the semester is over!!! Hooray!!!
Love Always,
Lisa :)
all i have to say about that moral is AMEN!
danny the nearly sleeping where he is
okay so guy the nature guy is at it again. I don't know about you but I difently though of the crocidle hunter when i read this story!!!!
--JAson all I have to say is, who flung poo?
-Kyla Don't call people phat they think you're calling them fat and will run after you
CDR
SIXTY SEVEN SIXTY SEVEN
hello every one. Are you, like me, trudging threw those last hefty homework assignments? Looking at the long list you've written down and finding that after hours of work you've only managed to mark off 3. And that one of those 3 isn't really done, you're just saying it is so that you can stop? So you;ll finish it in class before you turn it in. It's his fault anyway that you didn't ask questions while you were deeply enthralled in your game of solitaire that you purposely sat in the back of class so you could play. He should have explained better, I mean you were listening! Who cares that you don;t understand the assignment and you really need to get a good grade on your next few things to try and strive for a helpless B by the skin of your teeth. your GPA depends on it! I mean you had better things to do like clean Spunky's cage, and change your buddy icon to a box of chocolates and stare at the "loading" sign for 10 min before realizing your fav game just isn't going to load!!! And then you had to worry that you had a banana and a zinger for breakfast and that that can't be that healthy... but at least you didn't burn the pizza to night, that's a plus. And you didn't have to go anywhere so you could stay home and work... but it doesn't matter because you are sore from doing three reps of bridges last night for the first time! Are you also frustrated because you can't find the vacuum and really need to? Did you not study for that test you said you would because quite frankly you don;t want to and your brain has had enough?
Yeah me to.
Silly Story 67
A Walk in the Park I then told my butler that he too should come with me. After all I would need someone to deliver me my beverages of fine wines and water. I also told my gardener to come along. I can not walk on grass longer than 3 1/2 inches. So he would trim it for me if the need should come across.
I then decided to order my cook to come along. After all, what if I got hungry? I'm sure one of those nice hotdog men would let him barrow there stove. I also requested that my driver come along. After all I am afraid I know where nothing is and would need him to steer me through the park.
I was getting ready to leave and it occurred to me to call my physical instructor. After all a walk was physical and he would need to monitor my breathing and heart rate. Then I thought about my heart rate indeed and decided to have my personal doctor come along incase anything should go array. Then I thought that maybe I should have my lawyer present incase the thing that went array was not my fault. (Which it wouldn't be, he would make sure of that).
Then I remembered that you should never go through the park alone. Well maybe I just decided that one should never go through the park without someone to make decent commentary with. So I called my elder brother. He and I always had the most joyous conversations. I was about to go, then it occurred to me I did not know what to wear to the park, being as I had not ever been in my fine adult years. So I called my fashion consultant. He helped me pick out an outfit and out of courtesy I had him come along. He carried a spare outfit just incase I had over or under dressed.
So the lot of us headed out of the house down the block to the park. To my utmost disgust there was one little old couple sitting under a tree there.
I had to turn around right then, and everyone with me. I just hate when there are crowds on a personal outing.
I was told the park always had people in it. So I had my own park built in my back yard. I never walk through it though. It is too much a bother.
The End
The moral: 11 is company, 2's a crowd. responses:
Hola all,
Why don't I have that many servants! I should! Damnit that's just not cool, and I'm all for walks in the park but it's just too cold out there...I think the guy also needed a personal weather controller...*kisses* byeeeee
Courtney the fabulous
what a schmuck! I think if i take a walk through the park, i should have everything i need right at my fingertips as well! you know,, speaking of wanting things,, i was thinking about getting some little torpedos built on to the front of my car. You know? So when im going through an area that 50, and people are going like 43,, i can just launch a torpedo, and the prolem is solved! Ive been thinking about this for quite some time now, and ive come to the conclusion, that the new car of the future should be able to hover, shoot torpedo, and should have a flashing neon sign that tells the drive next to you *SAME TO YOU BUDDY!*.
Marla the damn clever wow okay that is the first time that I know of the the commentary was almost as long as the story!!!!! but it was very cute. Nice story I liked it a lot!!!!
-- Jaosn Hello All-
Wow, is there anything or anyone that that guy didn't forget to bring? Funny
story, Meagan. I enjoyed it.
Courtney, someday you will have more servants than the guy in the story.
Don't worry. Marla, cars with torpedos- you will be the head of Ford Motor
Company someday with that idea. You will make millions of dollars and have your
super car with torpedos, neon signs, and hovering capabilities. When you both
are that rich and famous, don't forget about me.
Good luck with classes everyone!!
Talk to you all later!!!
Love Always,
Lisa :)
Three more weeks until the end of classes!!! I will be home on May 9, after
finals.
I Like It!!!
'nough said!
Danny
SIXTY EIGHT????? SANTA HAS BEEN REMOVED!!!!
Siilllyy ssttoorryy 68
Santa's Escape
April 11th 2003 Santa sat atop the worlds largest ketchup bottle and sighed heavily. He was way out of season. He was annoyed the weather had actually decided to warm up a bit and he was getting rather warm. He had been waiting precisely 107 days to be removed by the people of Collinsville. The first week he didn't worry too much. Lots of people kept Christmas decorations up until NewYears Eve. A few weeks after New Years he still didn't worry. Christmas trees were still up in some of the lazier people's homes and he did not find it uncommon for them to leave decorations up until the end of January.
When February rolled around Santa began to worry. Soon people would be exchanging hearts and candy and he would be dreadfully out of place. Alas Valentines day came and passed and Santa felt very uncomfortable with the strange looks he received. February was a short month but not for Santa. He thought maybe they were all on a vacation, the people who were suppose to take him down.
March came and Santa began to get mad. He heard rumors of people leavening him up all year round. But he stayed. The rumors couldn't be true! That would be so tacky.
Alas the end of March and the beginning of April and Santa began to wonder if the rumors were true!
So there he sat on April 11th distraught, forgotten, sweaty and tacky. At exactly 3:20ish he began his climb down. It was dangerous and difficult (him only being kinda 2D). Alas he made it and fled from the tacky little town of Collinsville. He hopped a plane and headed north. He is now his happy jolly self and even sent an incriminating picture to the people of Collinsville in charge of his removal.
The End
Moral: IT may cost to get a fat man up, and it may cost to get him down, but neither is worth the incriminating pictures you'll receive for letting him be. Responses: Ok, let me be the first to say,,, THAT IS FUCKING TACKY AS ALL HELL.
you just dont leave holiday decorations up that long. That made that part of collinsville look trashier than it already does (not that it looks THAT bad, but it didnt help!) whoever is in charge of making sure collinsvlle doesnt go to shit has done a TERRIBLE job. first with the santa,, and now with the aldis going in where national used to be. What? is this town supposed to be "East St Louis: Part dos" ??? Not cool.
Thanks meggy for bringing this tragic realization to mind. It was a good story, very entertaining!
We should all sit and think about what this town is going to be in 10 years.
Marla the not trashy, and definetly not amused Hola
I agree fully with pinky poo...I'm anti-x-mas stuff all year around...and let's not think about c-ville in ten years, I don't like to think about things that trashy and el wrongo....*kisses* byeeeee
Courtney the anti-trashy HI Everyone!!!
I just spent some time outside enjoying the sunshine. It was great!!!
Ok, so hopefully, none of us will be in Collinsville in ten years. We will all
be in other less tacky places.
I'm so glad that Santa has finally gone back to the North Pole where he
belongs. He can stay there until next Christmas. Hopefully, he won't make his
next stay as long as this one.
Talk to you all soon!!!
Love Always,
Lisa :)
did they really finally bring him down or was that a joke cause I not sure could this be explained please? I love the story though down with lazy ass collinsville people!
--Jason dear gods on Olympus, why are people in Collinsville so lazy? If the city actually takes Santa down at a reasonable time this next holiday season, I will throw them a big drunken party in my library. I'll even let them exchange the hot cowboys with strippers for a night.....I'll just hide in my office with the cowboys.-Kyla
WOO 69 ARE YOU A HERO? I should go to bed.... hmmmm... yes I should...on the other hand delusion can be creative....
it's naughty 69
Sixty Nine
(Gentle viewers, this was going to be about streaking through the weeds... but who can pass up an opportunity such as the number 69)
The number 69 has been used to symbolize a sexual act among to persons. (Lisa, Marla keep reading) Usually a mutual arrangement of simultaneous oral favor. However the number sixty nine was never asked if it should like to be displayed as such a naughty number.
Sure it enjoyed the attention. Let's face it after the number ten people lose count. They don't care about those other numbers. 1-10 get all the main glory. All the little children must learn them. They are the base of the whole number system. Then there are the multiples of ten. Tweedy, Thirty, Forty, Seventy. They're so easy, so high, so used. Then there are the increments of five. Everyone loves a multiple of five. 25, 75. Using five can also inroute one to multiples of ten 50. 50 is a favorite of both 5 and 10.
Then there are the lucky numbers, 3, 7...11. And the unlucky numbers...13. They get attention for many reasons. Then there are the numbers that protain to a certain date, like the 15th, it's pay day. But 69 is too high to be a date, to complicated to be a multiple that is simply and commonly used, too awkward to be lucky or unlucky. As for special ages... not every one makes it to 69, and it;s nothing extremely special when they do. It's not a 16, 18, 21 or 50, so who cares?
Sixty nine got it's calling as a sexual symbol worn by the naive and the horny. Sixty nine has been exploited as naughty and provocative. But Sixty nine, while lusting in the pleasures of being known, did not want such a meaning. If anyone had stopped to ask 69 what it wanted to stand for it would have told you about it's spiritual calling, and it;s need to be pure. For this reason it could never be a priest, but perhaps a nun or a saint.
Sixty nine would have asked to be a number or the church. Sixty nine would have wanted to work with children, not whores. Sixty nine would have wanted to work with God, not pimps. Sixty nine would have wanted to be displayed on some pure pamphlet, not the hat of a horny teenager.
Alas, no one asked sixty nine what it wanted to stand for. So it is tainted. It can not be pure while so many see it as naughty. But it must float along and hope to be forgotten as no great number is.
It is doomed to forever stand for... well 69ing. What exactly is that called? no no no not 69 but uh...isn't there another term? Well, any way you get the point.
Sixty nine has possibly earned it's title by it's provocative shape. As it appears that the numbers six and nine are enjoying eachother. That is another thing.
Sixty nine can stand being a sex symbol, but is not sure it can take being seen as two numbers. Since most people perceive it as 6 and 9 being naughty together....Wait 69 you are free to be pure. You are not dirty dear sixty nine, but 6 and 9 are dirty together. You are free! Free to be forgotten... Let 6 and 9 take the shame they have mistakenly befallen upon you! Run free 69, go with God and frolic and- Oh it appears sixty nine would rather have shameful fame than no fame at all...
Well... Sixty nine truly is a dirty number. Let me tell you the story about how the pure number sixty nine was corrupted by the evil horny numbers 6 and 9... it all started...Ah gag gag
(gentle viewers, we have gagged the long winded narrator so that this story may end. For else he would go on forever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever. And he would tell you more stories that would go on and on and on and on and on and GAG)
((gentle viewers we have gagged the special informer of outer story needs. We are proud to bring you the end))
The End
The moral: It is corrupt to 69, but dirty to 6 and 9. Responses: Hello All-
Thank you for keeping the story clean Meagan. It's nice to know that you were
thinking of me and Marla when you wrote this. I found the story to be very
informative. Thanks.
Talk to you all later!!!
Love Always,
Lisa :)
this was very informational! I thought this story was very entertaining. It just isnt fair that this poor number gets viewed in such a bad light. I think 68 is a more evil number, because then you owe one,, ya know??? Ugh
Marla the tormented
I believe your are the single strangest indidual on the planet dear
Jason
Speaking of which, "Sixty Nine" was....interesting. So, we've been wrong all along, haven't we? 69 isn't dirty; just 6 and 9. Hm. Interesting. I must now ponder the meaning of life for a while........
Bye! kyla Poor 69 I never knew of it's pain and sorrow...I think we should start a campgain trying to clean up it's repuation
CDR
LEft or Right?