The School Play
Two little boys, both age nine, were set to appear in their first play. The first boy had to say, Ha fair maiden, I've come to snatch a kiss and fill your soul with hope. The second little boy was to say, Hark, a pistol shot.
On the first night, the two boys were very nervous. It was their first time on stage and their parents were in the front row. The first little boy came out and said, Ha fair maiden, I've come to kiss your snatch and fill your hole with soap.
This made the second boy even more nervous. He came on stage and said, Hark, a shistol pot.......a shostile pit.........a pastal shit.......shit pot.......cow shit......bull shit!!!! I didn't want to be in this damn play anyway!!