Timeline

Early 1996: The phrase "Ass Full Of Dick" is coined by Justin Hebert, who is listed in our thanks section

October 1996: The idea of forming a band is thrown around. Suggested band names are: The Jesus Nutsack, The Abandoned Nutsack, Biblical Gonorrhea, Urine Sample, Jesus Libido, Three Mexicans and Andy, Shit Stain. Soon after, The Abandoned Nutsack is decided upon.

December 1996: At this point, the members, which at one point was 7, decide on stage names, none of which stuck. The only things certain then were that the album's name was Turn Your Head And Cough, and we were going to cover MTV's "Buzzkill"'s theme song, but that never followed through.

January 1997: The Chorus to "Ass Full Of Dick" is written spontaneously while mocking a country song. Later that month, the rest of the lyrics were written. It was also rehearsed, but not recorded.

February 1997: The Abandoned Nutsack finally records!! "Ass Full Of Dick" is layed down in 90 seconds, with No-Name Maddox on guitar and vocals, and Jim Shitter on keyboards. Parts of the verses as well as the riffs were ad-libbed. This version appears on Turn Your Head And Cough. Shortly the song was heard by James Butler, Billy Varner, and Brent, and won lukewarm reviews. February was also the month where many new songs were written. The February song-writing spree yielded "Crotch Crickets", "I Fucked The Virgin Mary", and "Semen Gumbo" on Turn Your Head and Cough. Many songs have yet to be recorded.

March 1997: Maddox and Shitter put together an intentionally-bad comedy routine. The name "The Shit Stain Duo" was later decided upon for the duo, and appears on Turn Your Head And Cough. "Kill The Pope" is recorded solo but later discarded. "Crotch Crickets" was rehearsed but never recorded. It was around this time that 2 members, Brandon Braud and Jay Richardson, were kicked out for lack of support.

April 1997: "I Fucked The Virgin Mary" and "Rock & Roll Raper" is recorded by Maddox alone. The latter is discarded. A few cover songs were also done.This would be the last recording for a long time. Russell Williams leaves the band.

Summer 1997: Some new songs were written but never rehearsed. The band mainly rides high on the fluke success of "Ass Full Of Dick".

November 1997: "I Ain't No Redneck" is written. This is the only song on TYHAC with a definite riff. A demo is planned.

December 1997: The band is too lazy to do much work. A few versions of songs may have been done solo. The title "Shitcakes and Redbeans", an old saying around here is given to a song with no lyrics or music. Ground work for the track listing is done.

January 3, 1998: The first ever recording of an entire demo was done by Maddox alone, again. The track listing follows the original plan. "Shitcakes and Redbeans" is recorded and proves to be the most raw material on the demo. With nonsenical words and an undefined riff, this song shows TANS in rare form."I Fucked..." and "Crotch Crickets" are given an improvised second verse "I Wanna Be Your Midget" is tentatively a jam scheduled for the next day.

January 4, 1998: "I Wanna Be Your Midget" is given a verse and is recorded. Later that month a few covers were done, but not taken too seriously. "Lick and Like" is attempted, with unsatisfactory results.

February 1998: "I Aint..." is attempted several times as well as "Semen Gumbo".

March 1998: An instrumental weird song is recorded.
-The Band names an untitled tune recorded on March 13, 1998. The name "Half-Breed" is given to the first of two songs improvised that day.

-The band decides that "Ass Full Of Dick" will be the album's first single. They are also trying to arrange a video for the song. Turn Your Head And Cough's scheduled release is Summer 98.

-The Abandoned Nutsack rehearsed on March 13, 1998. Johnny Skidmarks and No Name Maddox played guitar on Ass Full Of Dick, Crotch Crickets, I Fucked The Virgin Mary, I Aint No Redneck, Semen Gumbo, Shitcakes and Redbeans, as well as two untitled tunes. Skidmarks cut a solo demo consisting of 5 songs: No Name Song, an aforementioned untitled song, instrumental, Lick And Like, and Cumwad. The final two are considered possible future material. Since then, songs tentatively titled "Last Time I Vomited" "I'm Gonna Get All Fat And Shit" have been worked on as a demo for the next album "Gubment Cheese". "Swallowed My Tongue" is another song possibility that is being organized as this is written.

April:

-4-3-98: "Kill The Pope", "Lick and Like", "I'm Not Stalking You", "Forbidden Planet" and "Fucked By An Angel" are layed down in a brief solo session by Maddox. "Forbidden Planet" and "Kill The Pope" are in very rough form. FP may be discarded. The other songs, most notably "I'm Not Stalking You", more than likely will find their way onto an album.

-Work begins on Gubment Cheese. In late March a few songs were put together for the album. So far this is the tentative tracks:

1. Last Time I Vomited (recorded few times in March)
2. I'm Gonna Get All Fat And Shit (same as above)
3. Half-Breed(recorded with Skidmarks on 3-13-98 session
4. Kill The Pope (old song attempted since early 97)
5. Untitled Song* (same as Half-Breed)
6. Lick And Like (recorded solo by both Maddox and Skidmarks during Feb-March)
7. Cumwad (Skidmarks solo demo)
8. Scruffie's Dead (computer cut-ups recorded in early 98)
9. I'm Not Stalking You(unrecorded but rehearsed of late)
10. Swallowed My Tongue (recorded twice in March)
11. Another Untitled Song (recorded Feb. 98)

4-5-98: Website plans include adding a FAQ section (frequently asked questions) and a rarities section. Stay tuned!

4-16-98: FAQ pushed back due to laziness and computer problems. A 2-and-a-half minute instrumental tentatively titled "Waste Of Tape" was recorded on 4-8-98 featuring James Butler, Prickboy, and No Name Maddox each on guitar, keyboard, and maracas. "I'm Gonna Get All Fat And Shit", another stab at "Ass Full Of Dick", and the Leadbelly cover "In The Pines" was attempted for the second time. Turn Your Head And Cough goes through editing, expect a late 1998 release.

4-17-98: Big news! Recording with the entire band begins on Gubment Cheese. Several songs are put together, including songs "I'm Gonna Get All Fat And Shit", "I'm Not Stalking You", "Last Time I Vomited", "Lick and Like", and an unfinished version of "God Bless Incest", as well as Turn Your Head..classics "Semen Gumbo" (6 times!), "Ass Full Of Dick (Till You Bleed)", "I Wanna Be Your Midget", "I Fucked The Virgin Mary", "Shitcakes and Redbeans". Session was over a span of 5 hours and culminated in the forceful removal of keyboardist Prickboy. He is now out of The Abandoned Nutsack.

4-24-98: Untitled Song at the 3-13 session is now named "Plethora." Added several new sections to the website

4-25-98: Jim Shitter, one of the original members of The Abandoned Nutsack, leaves the band. A replacement may be used at some point, but for now, the band consists of Maddox and Skidmarks.

May:

5-15-98: Short recording session, played "Ass Full Of Dick", "I'm Not Stalking You", and The Sesame Street Theme Song. The latter will more than likely appear on the 3rd album.

With the absence of Jim Shitter, The Abandoned Nutsack will more than likely be a duo from now on. Big news for the website: The Quest To Kill The Pope Webring is in the works. This webring will focus on websites of similar interest. We are looking forward to linking to some of the great sites on the web. If you would like to participate, and you have a web page, please let us know. More information will be available will time provides.

5-23-98: Last Recording session for Turn Your Head And Cough. No outstanding renditions, but did manage to rid the rust of the long break from extensive recording.

5-28-98: Brief solo session for Maddox for a new song "Tommy Girl". Recorded 3 times and is in rough form.

June:

3rd: solo practices of "Burning Down The Chuch", "Fucked By An Angel", and "Tommy Girl"

Mid-June: began writing more new songs, recorded a song called "Some Guy's Ass". Practice briefly. Prepare for the July 4, 1998 release of Turn Your Head And Cough. The album will be sent to various record companies, as well as friends and fans. To everyone else the album will be available for $2. Early copies will include demo versions of the songs off TYHAC. More information on the availability will be available after the official release.

28th: held an afternoon session yielding TYHAC's "Shitcakes and Redbeans", and "I Fucked The Virgin Mary". The session also included takes of "Some Guy's Ass", "I'm Not Stalking You", as well as a take of "Kill The Pope", and a new song called "Public Masturbation".

July:

2nd: Well, it's almost here! Turn Your Head And Cough is being polished right now and will be made available on the 4th. If you want the album here's what you do. Send an email to abandonednutsack@hotmail.com and include your name and home address. For the month of July, the album will be sent to you for free! After July 31, though, they are 2 dollars apiece.

4th: IT'S HERE!!!!! TIME TO TURN YOUR HEAD AND COUGH CHILDREN. E-MAIL THE BAND AND WE'LL SEND YOU A FREE COPY FOR A LIMITED TIME!!!!!

17th: BIG NEWS!!!! Several new songs done for first time. A session with one guitar and maracas held today. The Band rehearsed the songs "Swallowed My Tongue", "Tommy Girl", "Vaginal Secretion", "Sesame Street", and two brand new songs, "Busted Bladder", and J. Skidmarks solo song "Fuck That Shit Up". Skidmarks song and "Busted Bladder" proved to be the most comical of the session. "Swallowed My Tongue" shows promise for being one of the band's best songs. A version of that song was done with fake drums and no guitar also, could wind up being a remix.

NOTE: ALL INFORMATION GIVEN TO THE ABANDONED NUTSACK REMAINS CONFIDENTIAL. YOU WILL NOT BE SUBJECTED TO JUNK MAIL AS A RESULT OF CONTACTING THE ABANDONED NUTSACK.

23th: MORE SONGS DONE!!!! This recording session saw the debut of songs like "Julio", "Fucked By An Angel", "Gluesniffer", "Burning Down The Church"(by the whole band), as well as songs "Swallowed My Tongue", "Busted Bladder", "Fuck That Shit Up" (with Maddox also), "Sesame Street", "I'm Gonna Get All Fat And Shit". This session also included a harmonica, and a microphone. The session also featured parodies of songs for the very first time "Big Ass Fucking Smile Upon My Face", a version of "Champagne Supernova" by Oasis, and parodies of "About A Girl" by Nirvana, and "Wild Thing" by Tone Loc. More covers practiced, but not recorded, were "Summertime Blues", "Louie Louie", "Tom Dooley".

29th: A bit of odd news to report. A tape of pop group "Merek And Derissa" was uncovered last night. The tape features Merek solo singing a capella songs like "You Ain't Funny In The Least Bit", "Dudelikamanity", "Where The Heck Is Angela?", and "Rad, Dude Dude". These songs were at one time forgotten until this discovery. There is another tape that exists of Merek And Derissa, a live concert taped sometime in 1993 or 1994. This tape is believed to be recorded around the same time. "You Ain't Funny......" is the only M&D song ever attempted by The Abandoned Nutsack, in February 1998.

August:

5th: held a brief solo session, recorded "Yellow Snow", "Suck My Own Dick", "Fucking The Blowdoll", and "Wiping My Ass". All of the songs are in very rough form. SMOD seems to be the most complicated to play. The complete band will eventually work on these songs.

8th: A full blown night time session spawned an improvised song, "On Your Chin Motherfucker", which will appear on Gubment Cheese. Also done were "I'm Gonna Get All Fat And Shit", "Tommy Girl", "Some Guy's Ass", "Swallowed My Tongue". Also done were covers by Aerosmith, Sam And Dave, and the Beatles. "Sweet Emotion", "Hold On, I'm Comin'", and "Come Together", respectively.

23rd: Sad news to report: At approximately 9 p.m. on the night of August 23, 1998, The Abandoned Nutsack was involved in a car wreck leaving No Name Maddox, lead singer and guitarist, and Johnny Skidmarks, guitar, as well as friend Holyman injured. Maddox suffered severe cuts and lacerations to his right arm. He is not expected to practice any time soon. Maddox also suffered temporary blindness for 2-3 minutes in the back seat of a 1988 Corsica that Skidmarks was driving. Skidmarks received a ticket for reckless driving. Maddox, immobile for several days, received up to 30 stitches in his right arm and 5-7 on the right side of his head. Johnny Skidmarks, made a sharp left turn on Hwy 73 of Louisiana when Holyman jerked the wheel causing the Corsica to strike a culvert in the back, where Maddox was seated. Skidmarks also received a cut on his head as well as a strained left arm. Holyman's only injury was a minor cut on his head as well as some soreness. The Abandoned Nutsack appreciates the help and concern from all of their fans who were affected by the crash. The band made a demo version of Gubment Cheese and were listening to it moments before the crash. It was later retrieved at the scene of the accident.

September:

The Abandoned Nutsack are now recovering from their injuries. It won't be long before they are able to record. Promotional copies of Gubment Cheese have been given out to local fans. A new song which has yet to be recorded but will eventually is "Corn In My Shit".

October:

The band has confirmed that a demo recordings have been done, but do not wish to divulge the songs played, the dates or what, if any album those songs will appear on. Keep checking back on more info on these new songs.

Maddox says in a recent interview that the songs that have been recorded recently have a "mellow, but serious tone" to them. But Maddox reminds us "the songs, though serious are something that are not going to be part of our future plans. After we do these songs, I plan on never acknowledging them again. It's just something we want to do as a side project, without the huge promotion and whatnot. You won't see any advertising about it, the demo will be given to fans and friends. We just want to do something on our own, without any hassle." We'll keep you posted on the demo.

17th: Maddox puts together a few songs including "Corn In My Shit", "Whacking Off While Taking a Dump", and a few others. These are in rough form, will eventually be worked on at a later date.

22nd: First recording session in 2 months and 8 days. Rusty performances of "Corn In My Shit", "Big-Ass Fucking Smile Upon My Face", "Some Guy's Ass", "On Your Chin Motherfucker", "Lick + Like", and "Swallowed My Tongue". This session featured friend Sammy Sackless on backup vocals. He may be used in later session. Sackless, as well as several locals, is a member of The Fat Fucks, a side project by The Abandoned Nutsack.

23rd: A bit of old news, but never reported until now. The Fat Fucks is a name given to the fans of The Abandoned Nutsack. Anyone who helps out the band by either promoting or just being a fan, is a Fat Fuck. Some of you out there now can consider yourself one.

Turn Your Head And Cough is now nearing its goal of 100 copies. As of October 23, 1998, 63 copies of the album have been distributed, as well as 24 advanced copies of Gubment Cheese. But don't fret folks, Gubment Cheese will soon be available to all that want it.

29th: The website will be experiencing additions in the next week. Original lyric sheets from numerous songs will be scanned, as well as artwork by The Fat Fucks. A new interview is in the works of being put online so keep checking in for the updates.

November:

6th: Turn Your Head And Cough now at 82 copies distributed. Maddox recorded a few songs today, "I Caught Jesus Masturbating," "God Is On Sale"(recorded over), "Negative Attitude." These songs will more than likely find their way on the next release by the band.
A survey has been given out to some fans. Their answers will be posted here before long. A remix of "Strawberry Urinal Cake" was put together, featuring background vocals by Fat Fuck Liza Gunness.

12th: Early grounds for a possible Christmas album discussed. In possible their first "performance", Maddox and Skidmarks tore pages out of a bible in front of an audience of approximately 100. The reaction was understandably mixed. Special thanks goes to Fat Fucks Liza Gunness, Michael Marchand for daring the band, and Halayna Lessard for supporting it. Maddox felt it was "necessary to shake up their lives, to have something so sacred destroyed. It gave me a rush I've never felt before. I was literally shaking."

13th: Release date for Gubment Cheese set for January 1, 1999. Get your copies reserved!!!

23rd: Holyman and Maddox participated in a really strange song called "Got Your I.D. Tag?" They made two takes. The song will be on the Christmas single. It served as the first time Holyman participated in a recording.

24th: New single to be released!! For the Christmas season, the Nutsack is releasing a collection of oddball songs like "Strawberry Urinal Cake (remix)" and "Yellow Snow." The latter is going to be the title of the E.P. It will serve as a pre-cursor to the next album. The Yellow Snow single will be limited to 25. Release date will be in late December.

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Email: abandonednutsack@hotmail.com