'a.little.faith'
do you take pride in making me cry?
you feed my need for something unclear.

"but when i think of it, my fingers turn to fists."
and i want to be gone without a trace.
everytime you leave though, i search for you.
i cry that you'll come back.
but those tears dry quickly.
i'd spend the days sleeping and the nights drinking.
i daydream of the love you surround me with.
but now wonder if it's all real.

the last news story makes me seem like
a blind fool yet i want you so badly.

you got away with it all and now you've got your cake.
your hatred for me was so convincing that its only natural to fall into your love.
what more can i do?

do you need me?
because all i need is a little faith.
6.19.02

'the.victim'
Seems like we're stuck here forever.
In this hell, will it ever get better?
My mind spins like crazy but I always think...
At least we have each other.
I have no doubt that you don't think that though.
You're too busy always being right and 'taking cover.'
"Sweetheart, but I swear," he says
as I nod again and pretend to believe
that what he has for me is true love.
Because his eyes tell me how confused he is.
And his anger finalizes it for me.

But what answer do I have for this?
Only the consoling of my own love that I know is true.
And it'll just have to be enough.
10.1.02

'went.for.a.walk'
you went for a walk.
you said you'd be right back.
but you lost your way.
and left me with just enough to miss.
i tried looking for you.
but i think you'd rather stay lost.

you tripped and fell into a deep dark hole.
i kept looking for you.
but i didn't see you in the deep dark hole.
and i walked right over you in your hole.

you're still stuck in the deep dark hole.
and i walked right past you.
but i'm still searching for you.

stay.
stay in your drug hole.

and i'll just keep looking for you.
11.28.02

'the.feeling'
the feel of the skin on your shoulder against the side of my face.
the safety of your arms and the love in your eyes.
the sadness and the tears everytime it happens.
but oh i miss that feel.
that feeling.
that love.
your love.
11.29.02