Kennesis Lake Vacation

Linda was up and half way through a bowl of porridge. I proceeded to make myself a Poptart and accidentally dropped it on the floor, twice. Linda paused with her spoon to her lips, frowning slightly. I knocked a pot on the floor which made her jump. Then I inadvertently slammed the cupboard startling her enough that she dropped her spoon.

“Why don’t you sit down…you’re turning me into a bundle of nerves” she shuddered.

Linda suggested taking a run over to see the Haliburton Wolf Centre before our scheduled bike run.

“I just want to warn you beforehand that there is an admission fee of $8.00…and no, it isn’t a lifetime membership and it doesn’t include a magazine subscription”, said Linda. She continued on, “and while I’m on the subject, we also have to pay $12.00 for a day pass to use the mountain bike trails. This price is EACH and there are no Ginzo knives or any other offers included.”

I started to interrupt but Linda held up her hand and said, “I know what you’re going to say, and no, you can’t barter with them.”

The Wolf compound was excellent and was only about 5 miles from where we were staying. There was an observation area with one way glass. The wolves could observe us but we couldn’t see them…or vice versa. There was a pack of probably 10 wolves who were free to roam around a 17 acre area. Fortunately, they chose to hang around the observation area where they were fed once a week. The guide had many interesting stories and was a good speaker. We stayed about an hour and a half and found it very interesting. To see the pictures we took, click on the link at the bottom of this page.

We left there and drove around the corner to the Haliburton Forest Base Camp to buy our mountain bike tickets. I crossed my arms and legs and purchased a set. Linda neglected to tell me about the $5 refundable fee for a key to the gate. I asked if we could just open it and I would run back with the key. Linda ran out the door in exasperation. There were several levels of colour coded trails with purple being the hardest. Red was second hardest. Since Linda’s knee is still healing from surgery we chose the red for our first trial. It was a near vertical trail strewn with baseball size boulders. Linda pumped her way easily to the top. I noted she hadn’t even broken a sweat. I pulled in behind her panting and wheezing.


*THE RARE, YELLOW-CRESTED HOOT OWL IN* *ITS NATURAL ENVIRONMENT*	*NEAR WHERE DAVE FOUND A DIME*	*LINDA PEDDLING HER WARES*


*LOOK OUT!!*	*KING OF THE CASTLE*	*NOT EVERYONE CAN PULL OFF WEARING* *A TENT-SHIRT*

“I hope you don’t think I’m a wimp for taking the easy trail” she said “Next year my knee should be much better”.

Thoughts of hiring the services of Tonya Harding, long before next year's trip, were dancing through my head.

At one point we took a purple trail up to a lookout. It was an excellent view. As I followed Linda to the edge she yelled, “get away from me – I don’t want you stumbling and knocking me off the cliff.” Sometimes she can be soooo dramatic.


*NOW THAT'S REAL MOUNTAIN BIKING!*	*FORGET THE VIEW...LOOK AT ME!!*


*MY NAME'S CLIFF - DROP OVER SOMETIME*	*MEDITATING AFTER A NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE*

The highlight for me was finding a dime on the trail. We biked over 20 k from 12:00-5:00 which was probably the equivalent of double that amount because of the mountainous terrain. Only a handful of people were encountered on the trails.

As I finished drying Gizmo's bowl, Linda suggested I give her a massage as her back was still sore. But first she explained to me the various muscle groups, their relationships and scientific names. I didn't know there would be a test later.

“Okay”, she said pointing to the sore spot on her back, “tell me what this is called”.

While Linda was in the shower, I stole a glance at the daybook. I opened it at random to discover that I was penciled in for a barn dance in July of 2004. Interesting. I hadn’t recalled agreeing to that. I skipped ahead several pages. March of 2016 caught my eye. Apparently this was a surprise retirement party for me. It was all planned out down to the last detail. I wondered if my co-workers knew what was in store for them. It seems that Percy and his new tools had been relegated to build a stage for Gary and his band. Dan was to set up the sound system. Judith would be asked to landscape the area. Kathy was in charge of the food. Kelly was to keep me entertained while John repaired everything that was wrong with my car. I closed the book. The theme from Twilight Zone was playing in the background as Linda rounded the corner.


*PADDLING KELLY LAKE* *(KELLY WAS NOT AMUSED)*	*LINDA SEES ME THROUGH* *ROSE-COLOURED GLASSES*	*THE PACE KAYAK OF THE* *2001 OLYMPICS*

Today was a slow day…we tanned on the dock and did this and that until 4:00. We decided to go on another 20 k kayak run. First there was a portage over a beaver dam under the road. Then we completely circumnavigated Kelly Lake including a hike/wade up the middle of a creek into Johnson Lake. We stopped for lunch at a small island on Kelly Lake and stayed for a while enjoying the sun.

"Ow! Quit doing that…you got me right in the scallops again," said Linda painfully.

We arrived back at 7:30 after having to line the kayaks through a shallow creek. I offered to carry Linda’s kayak back up to the cottage since her back was still sore.

“Here, let me lighten the load” said Linda removing her map, a foam insert and a small bag of trail mix.


*A REAL SWINGER*	*WHERE'S MY CHIROPRACTOR?*	*FIVE YEAR OLDS AT PLAY*

We rooted through the cottage games but most of them required you to read instructions and think. We weren't up for that.

"I'll go first" said Linda, "I spy something with my little eye that begins with 'N'".

"What…Oh, yes, we each brought one" she replied while turning the page on her Reader's Digest.

"So…you want to play rough" I thought. "I spy something with my little eye that begins with 'P'".

"Are you sure you've played this game before?" she asked then continued in a bored voice, "I spy something with my little eye that begins with 'F'".

Linda looked confused, "There aren't any French fries here…it has to be something you can see."

I yelled after her. "Flying fish? Foreign immigrants? Fried bananas? Flip Wilson?"

The door slammed. I did hear her yell something that started with an 'F', but if that was the answer, I think that was unfair, as it wasn't a person place or thing.

"We have to alternate" said Linda as she sang her usual chant "Upper body, lower body, upper body, lower body…"

There was a pause then she yelled in frustration, "Now you've got me calling it a hat"


*SOME OF THE THINGS I HAD TO DO TO IMPRESS LINDA AND WIN HER OVER (HEY...IT WORKED!!)*


*TRAIL TO HAVELOCK LAKE*	*ANOTHER MODERATE SLOPE*	*WHERE AM I?! WHO AM I?*

We drove the bikes over by car for a 20 k loop which started at the Osprey Trail and ended at Havelock Lake. As usual the hills were killers and we ended up on some of the harder purple trails. We saw no one else the whole time. It’s an amazing and very wild area. After a full day we returned to the car. As I pulled out, something rattled on the roof and clunked onto the road.

BLACK SQUARE = COTTAGE

YELLOW LINE = OUR KAYAK ROUTES

BLUE LINE = OUR BIKE ROUTES

We stopped in at the marina for some cleaning supplies. The clerk looked warily at me possibly hoping I wouldn't inquire about jet ski rentals. Back at the cottage, salad was on the menu for supper along with Perrier water and lemon.

"We could play that cabbage game you always like" I said as I dried the last dish.

As usual, Linda won the game. It seems the rules change every time we play. When Linda has the jack she gets 20 points. When I have the jack, Linda gets 20 points. It's a game I'll never understand.

I found some cottage videos. In between packing and cleaning the cottage, we watched an old Superman cartoon, and 1/4 of "Road to Singapore" with Bob Hope and Bing Crosby. Perhaps the marina orders their videos from the cottage.

Linda was up at 7:00 polishing this and that. By the time I got up she had finished scrubbing someone's bottle cap collection. The dust had been washed and was neatly hanging on a line over the balcony. We had to leave by noon as new recruits were due in. The car was repacked with kayaks and bikes as we left our happy little cottage.


*WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO?*	*VIEW FROM THE COTTAGE*	*RAPUNZEL LET DOWN YOUR HAIR*

As I drove along the winding road, Linda brought out our little sheet of finances.

"We might as well sort out what we owe." She said continuing "What's this you've got on here? You're charging me $7.00 for chocolates your sister gave you?"

"Well…you're charging me $15.00 for used food you brought from home and all I had of it was a shake from the salt shaker, a cup of rice and a spoonful of olive oil." I replied.

"Well…if you're going to be like that then I'm adding in wear and tear on my tea towel" she said scribbling furiously.

"Give me that list" I said snatching it from her hand as Linda took over the steering wheel.

I wrote some things of my own. Linda grabbed the list back, read what I'd written and muttered "All right then…if you're going to bill me for wear and tear on your tires and 1/4 of a litre of oil then you owe me for depreciation on my tea strainer and for the two sips you had of my Gatorade - that stuff is expensive, you know."

It was a fascinating trip into the world of tort laws. Legal books were strewn all over the dashboard and at one point we stopped at a phone booth to make a quick clarification call to Judge Wapner of People's Court. Many precedents were set and eventually it was worked out to the satisfaction of both parties.

Fortunately, our vacation was over as I didn't think my body could take too much more of one of Linda's relaxing holidays. Finally I could get back to work where I could rest and recover. I’m still doing that today. Unpacking back home, Linda discovered some socks that did not belong to either one of us. Perhaps they were Gizmo's.

STOLEN

MERCHANDISE

WANTED

FOR SOCK THEFT


*HANGING BY A THREAD AT THE LOOKOUT ON LOOKOUT TRAIL*


*STRANGER IN PARADISE*	*DITTO*

Tuesday August 14, 2001