You know you're from Chicago when:

You don't pronounce the "s" at the end of Illinois.
You become irritated at people who do.
You know it really doesn't matter because, of course,
       you're from Chicago, not Illinois
You measure distance in minutes.
You have no problem spelling or pronouncing "Des Plaines."
Your school classes were canceled because of cold.
Your school classes were canceled because of heat.
Stores don't have sacks, they have bags.
You end your sentences with an unnecessary preposition.
     Example: "Where's my coat at?" or "I wanna go with."
Your idea of a great tenderloin is when the meat is twice
     as big as the bun and accompanied only by ketchup
     and a dill pickle slice.
You carry jumper cables in your car.
You drink "pop."
You know the names of the interstates: Stevenson, Kennedy, Eisenhower.
You refer to anything South of I-80 as "Southern Illinois".
You refer to everything outside of Cook County as
     "downstate".
You refer to the state of Wisconsin as "the suburbs".
You refer to Lake Michigan as "The Lake".
You refer to Chicago as "The City".
You refer to the Museum of Science and Industry as
     "The Museum".
You have two favorite football teams: The Bears, and
     anyone who beats the Packers!
You buy "The Trib", but it makes you nervous because you
     know the name " Col. McCormack."
You think 30 degrees is great weather to wash your car!
You know what goes on a Chicago Style Hot Dog.
You know what Chicago Style Pizza REALLY is.
You know why they call Chicago "The Windy City".
You understand what "lake-effect" means.
You know the difference between Amtrak and Metra, and
     which station they end up at.
You have ridden the "L".
You have used your furniture to guard your parking spot.
You respond to the question "Where are you from" with a
     "side",
          i.e. I'm from the South Side.
You know what the phone number is to Empire Carpet.
You know how to pronounce this name:
       "John M. Smyth"