Hey,this journal features topics that you may not care or wanna hear about. Having to do with my boyfriend and My everyday life n' accurances. k? if your a complete n' >(*Total Bytch*). you'd undastand. byee
|kristin|
Complete n' Total Bytch
Saturday.July.23.2001
.ºSleepy Head!^_^.
Hi.I just woke up. I'm still kinda tired. Derek woke me up. I love him. I love waking up to the sound of his voice too. I just wish ehw as next to me. Not all the way at his house. But that will do for now lol.
Today I dont think I'm doing anything special. I'm just gonna hang around here ntil 4 when Derek comes over from skating. I do have to go to his house while he's skating becuz I have to get my bag. When we went to his house lastnight I didn't realize how long it was gonan take so I left my bag there and now I want it and he can't bring it skating. So I have to have my mom drive me there to get it.
I'm kinda hungry. I think I'm gonna add a new section below. Called Right About Now... just tellin u what im doing right about then.. ya know. That sounds good huh? Well I'm gonna go for now. If i wanna get my bag and stuff I'm gonna need to get dressed. Cuz there's a picture of me in my bag that I thought came out wicked good so I'm gonan change my pick below becuz that picture is from like January. I look totally different. lol. it's just the ponly picture i have thats half decent thats not from last summer. So I'll ttyl and look for updates.
Yo!! hehe. I had a fun and tiring day today.I first woke up and got dressed. I was sooo tired. I called Derek but sleepy head was still sleeping so I got myself ready and then he called me cuz his mom woke him up. We talked for a like a half an hour and then I had to head down to work. I worked with Chris a younger brother of a person me and Drek know and then at 2:30 Derek came and we worked together, which I like. It's always fun. Butt agggh!! It was so hott! So we did our thing with some aruing lol. And then John his step father picked us up cuz he wanted me to coem home with him. So we went to the super market and then we went to his house and ate. Then we watched Jackass vidoes that his friend and sisters boyfriend taped. Then we went for a walk with his mom step father and sister. We fought at the begining and then talked it out. Then he look took ema dn his sister out. My white capris are all dirty and grass stained lol. it was so much fun though!. Thats one thing I love about Drek (along with much more) but he can Always make me laugh!!! ^_~ and I can Always have tons-o-fun with him.
So anyways right now im listening to, One Minute Man By Missy and Featurin Ludacris. it's sucha good song. I like the beat and everything. I use to ahve Napster,/b> but it sux so now I haveKazaa which is sooooo good! You can download anything on it. Seriously. Music videos ..movies..songs and its really fast too!! I love it. I can find whatever I want with the right names lol.
I tlaked to Melissa kinda. We talked but we ended up arguing and she either blocked me or got off. She's sucha bitch and she knows that everything Kayla said ws a lie for a fact. Cuz none of it makes sence and these so called things that happened a while ago she wouldve known about.. cuz we use to tell eachother Everything and im not lying. And then shes throws everything in my face. So I emailed her. She cant argue threw and e mail. if she reads it or deletes it whatever, she was even ungrateful ebuff to say I never did shit for her. O ok. thats just when her and her mother fought I was there for her when she called me crying. Whatever. Aggh. Then shes like why are u comin bak to me.. im like wel Im trying to be mature and help you. Cuz I know if she hangs out with someone like her. She'll deff. get screwed over and shw was always better then that ya know? But whatever, I'm tired and I'm gonna go. Byee
Hey.I went to Derek's after he got out of work. He coems in my house and then up to the computer room/guest room and woke me and up. Hes like GET UP!!! lol. Matt's waiting to bring us to my house. lol. I was like ok. half asleep. I like fell asleep on him in the car. Once I woke up. We talked a lot and everything is worked out. it's so much easier talking in person ya know? It gets things sovled better and it's a lot more effective.
I cried to Derek today. Im so upset when it coems to the guys at my moms home. I just can't take thinking that people make fun of them. they are so innocent and so sweet. Why would anyone want to do that.I mean people who say retarded and stuff like that. I use to say it a long time ago. But that was just Ignorance. I neevr thought of it as being bad. Like black people they hate the "N word" and they stand up for it so people know how bad it is. Mentally challenged peopel can't. So know one thinks of it as bad. Some people use it as an everyday word. It's wrong. And I can't stand it. I Love them. They all are like family to me, ya know?
OMG. I just got into a huge fight with like the biggest how from my old school. My "so-called" old friend Melissa. Started it. I warned her about this girl and said shes nasty and shes gonan get into trouble. Melissa has already started changing. But she goes and tells her and the bitch IMs me saying all this UNTRUE stuff, which im really not lying. But there was one thing that was true and it has to do woth me and Derek which is none of her buisness. He's my boyfriend of basically a year. It's not some stupid fling. like ehr all the time. I love him. he's special. So where she coems off callin me names saying things that arent to. it makes her look so smart. LOL I just have a little message for her and Melissa..
Ok listen u bitch. Firstly I'de like to say to Kayla... OK. u r nasty. u r the whore. ur wicked fat too. no one likes u and these i mgith ad r all facts. You probably have some unknown disease. from like screwing around with to many guys. U have a problem with ur won color (white) which is strangley odd. But anwyays. Your nasty. You think your god's gift but all u really are is God's reminder of how much better everyone else is. lol. Wow. thinking of u makes me laugh.
And for Melissa, You were a friend of mine from 5th grade. We had so mcuh fun together. You were my friend before u started slummin for some. How u could throw that all away for that is beyond me. But hey. O well. U started this fight after I was trying to help u realize. And this is what I have to say.. Your a bitch. U think ur the shyt but ur not. All the guys u like and that "like" you. are from On line and they are lik 20 with babys. Ok thats something to be proud about. U pretended to be my friend. I sat on the phone and listened to ur problems and whatever and this is what I get. it' been unfortunate these past months espcially woth ur fathers death. But U cant blame how u r acting on that. I undersdtand it's hard but why u became frinds with her is just wow. U say i dont call u enough if U was a real friend I would. I dotn se u makin an effort to call me. And it's long distance. Plus i tlak to u online. So whatever. u bitch.
Well thats all I have to say. I'm tird and I have to work tomorrow and Im still arguin with them online. cuz they are immature and wont leave me alone. k Byee!
Today I had so much fun. My mom wanted me to go to this picnic/fair thing at this camp fround with the mentally challenged people she takes care of. She's a manager at a house for them. AT first I ddin't want to go but it was so much fun. We went swimming. There's a guy in a chair and his name is TIm he has problems movin his arms and legs. he is such a sweetheart. Well anyways we took him swimming lol it was so much fun. He love sbeing dunkd under water. He calls me his girlfriend lol. He's so cute. I had so much funa dn I got some sun thank god!! I just had a blast.
Me and Derek got into a huge fight lastnight. Like one of the worst ever. He hung up on me and we didn't talk for the rest of the night. But he calle me really early this morning b4 I went which i thought was so sweet that he had the effort to wake up and call me and apologize and I apologized too. he should be here in 45 minutes. After work!!! I'm glad I missed him. We work together tomorrow too. Well I'm gonna go. He's probably gonna skate tomorrow T_T. Byeee!
|kristin||iderek|5:16 pm||xoxo <
Saturday.July.21.2001
.ºFeelin' Goodº.
Today I had so much fun. My mom wanted me to go to this picnic/fair thing at this camp fround with the mentally challenged people she takes care of. She's a manager at a house for them. AT first I ddin't want to go but it was so much fun. We went swimming. There's a guy in a chair and his name is TIm he has problems movin his arms and legs. he is such a sweetheart. Well anyways we took him swimming lol it was so much fun. He love sbeing dunkd under water. He calls me his girlfriend lol. He's so cute. I had so much funa dn I got some sun thank god!! I just had a blast.
Me and Derek got into a huge fight lastnight. Like one of the worst ever. He hung up on me and we didn't talk for the rest of the night. But he calle me really early this morning b4 I went which i thought was so sweet that he had the effort to wake up and call me and apologize and I apologized too. he should be here in 45 minutes. After work!!! I'm glad I missed him. We work together tomorrow too. Well I'm gonna go. He's probably gonna skate tomorrow T_T. Byeee!
|kristin||iderek|5:16 pm||xoxo <
Saturday.July.20.2001
.ºCompletely Pissed º.
Hey. Omg Derek is not being Derek and I dont know why. And when he calls (im on the phone with tamara) he wont really beable to tlak cuz Matt's over.. sleeping over. I wont beable to talk to him in the morning either cuz I'm leaving at 9.
It's really like he doesnt even care anymore. Seriously. I dont know what I did wrong or what his problem is but I'm sick of it. It's such completely fucking bull shit. Aggggggh!!!!!!!!!!!
|kristin||iderek|9:46 pm||xoxo <
Saturday.July.20.2001
.ºAll Betterº.
Hii!. Agggh. Ok. I've like killed myself the past 4 hours being mad and getting upset. I realized that I can't be mad at Derek for more then 4 hours. I love him too much and that pisses me off even more lol.
Even though he lieks his weeners well done LOL. JK.. ::expresion::(obviously) I Love him more then life. and I hate the fact that i love him so much to the extent that I can't be mad lol.
I haven't really done anything today. I made anew page but I'm not posting it untill I figure out what I wanna do with it. But I will give u a hint. it's a hand book me and my fellow bitch Carol made.
I got the sweetest thing in the mail today.It's from one of my older best friends that i had gone threw everywhere and bak with. We were inceprable untillw e did something that got us both into so much trouble and we werent allowed to see eachother anymore. And after that we just kinda drfited. But she gave me Feed bak today that meant so much and I just wanna say thanx too her and that in a way. She's right, we will awlays be best friends.
Hey Kristin...
No matter where we both end up...no matter how far away or close we are to each other...I want you to know that you will always be my best friend in the world and nothing or no one can ever change that...we've been through the best and worst of everything possible and I couldn't imagine one person that could ever take your place...You deffinately are my best friend for life and I am so happy that you found Derek because you needed someone to cheer you up and brighten your days and he deffinately does all that and more for you...so congratulations...especially on your one year" August 1" and I wish you guys the best of luck
Thanx so much Kristi that meant a lot
|kristin||iderek|4:41 pm||xoxo <
Saturday.July.20.2001
.ºFalling Apart.
Hey. Everything is going completely crazy and I cant take it anymore. I'm so tired and depressed.
Like I have told you before my mom is being a complete bitch and I mean BITCH agggh. She said something in the car and gave me a complete attitude when I said Derek was coming over, right in front of his sister, AGGGH!!!! SO his sister I guess said something to his mother and now his mother doesn't want him over here. Which I wouldn't blame him if he didn't wanna be here anyways.
Then I was and still kinda am mad at Derek. It's like he's been ignoring me in a way. But not ignoring cuz he doesn't like me in that way. But like he's too busy. We've barely seen eachother and we tlaked about it and I know he cares and I know that it hurts him. Just by the way he was acting. And I'm really glad he didn't like yell at me about this or whatever. But I'm just so mad. This morning I wanted him to come over and he kinda gave me a hard time and I had to swear at him about it for him to come over becuz he has the game called The Sims and he is making a house for us and everything and he's into it and he wants to finish downloading things and I was like no. Cuz he had to work at 11:30. So I'm like come see me. at 10. So his mom I guess was like not coperating or whatever and they didn't get here until 11. So I saw him for a half an hour and he's like a brang my skateboard. I'm like ok. But I thought u were coming here after to work to be with me cuz I can't see him tomorrow and we have to work together half the time sunday. He has so much fucking time to skate and can't see me? Don't get me wrong Derek is the ebst boyfriend but lately he's slacking and its hurting us as a relationship. I mean he's like o well I saw u b4 work. FOR A HALF AN HOUR!!!!! agghh! He promised to call me and everything tonite. He's having his friend Matt Sleep over. How is he gonna fucking tlak to me? See what I'm saying. Agggh. I know he loves me and he cares but sometiems he just doesnt think before he says and does things and lately he's seemed weird. I dunno. Like I know he loves me and he's showing me but he just seems to busy and he gets ma dwhen I say that cuz he says hes never to busy for me. But, he just kinda has been lately. he says its summer school and now it's over but things were like this the whole time. Only lately. If this keeps happening it's gonan tare me apart. he's just no acting like himself. Even one of his friends said that. about not seing me as much. I dunno but whatever.
So to top things all off. I was crying hard when we were talking about things. and my step father went downstairs and he motioned for me to coem over to him. (we arent suppose 2 be on the same bed, thats why we waited) and he gave me a big hug and we ell backwards and I started like gigly laughing and I think he saw us when he came bak up. Which makes it look like I'm on top of him on a bed. Like we were doing something bad. Which isn't even good. Ya know? AGggh. I swear to god I'm gonna die. Things are just going completely down hill it seems and I cant take it. I dont know what to do! T_T
Hey. I had so much fun today!! We first got my check and I got not even half as much as I thougth I would. I guess the pay roll is permenitly bak a week.O well. I got what I needed, which were..blue army socks hehe and Van Sneakers which deffeinitly needed sneakers. They are pink and white :).
It was funny cuz we were suppose 2 get bak a lot later and we ended up leaving at 9:30 and getting home at 1:30 so Derekwas with his friend thinking that I wouldnt be home till later so it didn't matter. But me and his sister waited until 4. Then we left and I had this feeling that he would be hoem right when we left becuz of course that always. happens lol. Anyways. I got home and he was home so we talked and then his mother picked me and his sis up and I went over there.
I love him so much. We are on a new Relationship Level yup. it's great. Many of you probably wont think this is a big deal but when ur in a long term relationship you'll know what I mean. he said I Love you in front of both our parents like out loud and open. I loved it. it mad eme feel good. like he's not ashamed ya know? I knew before he wasn't ashamed thats not what Im saying but its an extra level like it shows how much more comfortable with me and how he doesn't care who knows it, Even both our parents. I feel so great.
Tomorrow. Me and Tamara,Derek's sister are runnignt he track. I need to lose a bunch of summer weight. Maybe even a lil winter weight. *hehe* shhh. So we are geting up at 6:30 and We are running. Omg Im gonna die. But Derek hs to work tomorrow so while he's working I can catch up on my rest. yayaay! lol. It's not like I dont sleep late everyday anyways.
Ok you are not gonan believe this. I submitted into a clique called [Self Proclaimed Bitch} and the gurl declined my site and that was ok but it was like she completely bitched me out on how I spell my words. Such as Bitch being Bytch and how I wrote shyt instead of shit.. So I e mailed her bak flipping on her saying she was a ride bitch and she has no right to critize me and how Im original. it's quite funny however at the time I ws very offended, I mean who wouldn't be. Se to make a long story short. We made up in a way and started talking about how Sexy my boyfriend is and how we make a good couple and how she thinks ever Derek she has ever met is hott. It was odd. But i guess it worked out in a good way huh? Well I'm gonna go. I'm tired and I'm waking up pretty early. Byeee! ^_^
Hey. Today was pretty fun. I got dressed and then Derek's mom and sister picked me up and we went to get him from summer school. Thank god his last day is tomorrow! Well anyways. We went bak to his house then to the park where we met Danny and Matt. Tamara and Matt really like eachother but Matt's wicked shy so hopefully we can fix that but anyways we talked and they skated and stuff. Then they wanted to go some where that we didn't So we went to Friendly's and i went to the bathroom. Then we walked to the store and got food. Then we went to my house and ate after going to the pool to tell her older sister Jill to coem pick us up at 5. So I hung out at his house until he came home at 8:45 which pissed me off but whatever. So we talked and everything and now I'm home.
I'm so mad!!! I'm not gonna see Derek tomorrow cuz he doesnt wanna go shopping with us. I wont see him friday that long cuz he has o work. I wont see him saturday cuz I have to go to this thing that he doesn't wanna go to and I have to work all day sunday. Agggh. I'm getting sick of this. Well I'm gonna go. I'm excited about the shopping and getting payed tomorrow I just wanna see Derek!! Byee!
Hey. I just woke up not to long ago. Im exhausted. Skool is gonna kill me when we start bak up again!! agggh. hehe. I dont even wanna think about it yet. Anyways
Today I'm kinda confused with the plans. Tamara told me lastnight her mom would let her see Derek's younger friend Matt if I went to the park with them lol. (chaperone) So I said ok. And that Derek should go there and skate and then we could go home or whatever when they were done talking, they could skate, and then derek would come over or whatever after.
Then Derek e mails me this morning cuz he wasnt let in on the plan untill I e mailed him lastnight and told him, he's like I'm getting home at 1:30 Matt's calling me at 2 and we are skating I will be at ur house t 5:30-6 , Ok did my plan go in one ear and out the other cuz how is Matt gonna call him if we are all at the park? lol. OK. Anyways. Maybe the plan changed. I'll find out once Tamara calls me.
I'm so excited though, tomorrow I'm going shopping and I'm gonna have so much fun. lol. I will get a pretty big pay check and I'm gonna buy tons of stuff cuz there is this HUGE sale at Bob's this week and I'm gonna buy whatever I can lol. Then my next paycheck next week which Is gonna be big too I will buy Derek's year anniversary present with. I woulod've bought it with this weeks but theres a huge sale that is never gonna happen again and I need to get there. Plus it wont mater if it's next week or the week b4.well I'm gonna go. Byeee!^_~
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