Rose's Valentine

Rose felt refreshed as she slipped into her work uniform on Valentine's evening. She was glad she had taken the night shift at the tavern; her and her friends had gone out to lunch and spent some time at the carnival down by the pier. The carnival was always so much fun. It brought back memories of when she first arrived in Santa Monica about nine months ago. She was scared of this new town at first; partly because she didn't know anyone. It was the same when Carpathia had docked in New York, leaving her lost and alone. She had gotten on a train as soon as she could, sleeping on the hard ground of the station while she waited for the next train. Of course, she was still grieving for Jack, and some days she felt like she couldn't go on, but with each passing day she grew stronger. She had learned so many thins from the events and people on Titanic. From Cal she had learned not to trust anyone, and from her mother she learned that money and social position doesn't matter. Most importantly, she learned how to live from Jack. She'll never forget that.

When she had arrived in Santa Monica, it was late in the evening, and the streets were dimly lit by small street lamps. Walking along a small road off Main Street, she came upon a two story house with a sign hanging out by the mailbox that read: "Sally's Inn and Boarding House ~ VACANCY". Rose laughed at her sudden luck, and carefully climbed the wooden front steps. There were two windows on either side of the front door which were glowing with light. After she knocked, a slim elderly woman answered with a smile, which relaxed Rose some. The woman welcomed her in warmly and introduced herself as Mrs. Sally Radison. Rose was lucky, ther ewas only one room left, the small one at the end of the hall. Rose loved it- it was painted light blue with lace curtains, and a flower print comforter. Its two windows were in the corner on different walls, and had a lovely view of the pier.

A cool breeze blew in and sent chills all through Rose as she finished getting ready for work. She shivered and ran over to close the window, but stopped, mezmorized by the lights of the rollercoaster far off on the pier. She still didn't have the nerve to ride that rollercoaster, she wasn't ready for the flow of emotions that she had just learned to control not long ago. Everytime she saw it, she promised herself she would soon. Sighing, she closed the window and grabbed her jackets and left for the tavern.

The tavern, or Papa Joe's Tavern, was set off of Main Street on a corner. It was close to the train station, which was the only mode of transportation in or out of Santa Monica, unless you owned an automobile. Rose came across the tavern in her job search, which began the first morning that she awoke and saw the opulence of her fancy room. She had money from Cal, left in his coat pocket, but she knew that wouldn't last long without a job.

The staff and regular costumers of the tavern were like Rose's second family, especially Papa Joe. He reminded her of her father, and she treasured him so much. Maggie and Dana, her fellow waitresses, were like the sisters she never had. They were the ones that had taken her out to lunch and to the carnival that day. They were older than her, but they still knew how to have fun. Rose knew most of the costumers by name: Bob, Harry, Marvin, and Ted. All single men who had come from families that had emigrated here during the gold rush back in 1849, and they just never left. The tavern was never quiet during the day, or night, for that matter. Papa Joe could always be heard telling jokes or laughing himself.

Rose walked in the back way of the tavern and slipped her apron on with a content sigh. Tonight shouldn't be too busy- just your usual travelers, and a few single depressed men. Ben surely wouldn't be here tonight, she thought to herself. Ben was a dark haired man who came in often for a drink or two after work, but he had ale instead of beer. He and Rose usually got into deep conversations, and he knew just how to make her smile. She knew she was falling for him, but something was holding her back. Plus, she's seen him swoon a few ladies in the tavern from time to time. How would she know if he was just playing around or if he really liked her? He probably has a date tonight, she silently thought.

She walked through the kitchen door and out into the bar/dinning area, smoothing her apron on her skirt, and surveyed the room. Almost everything was made of mahagony wood: the floors, the doors, the walls, the chairs and tables, and the bar. It gave it a dark glow, including the smoke from cigars and cigarrettes. A few couples were seated by the big window, and two elderly men sat in a dark corner playing chess, as they did every night, The bar was nearly full, all men with a few empty mugs in front of each of them. Geez, it's only seven o'clock, and they've downed that much already? Rose smiled to herself as she went behind the bar.

Papa Joe saw her come in and greeted her with a big smile. "Why, hello, Rose! How has your Valentine's Day been?"

"Good," Rose smiled, "Maggie and Dana took me to lunch, and to the carnival down at the pier."

"Ahh, your favorite place," Papa Joe laughed, filling up another mug.

"What do you need me to do?" Rose asked, not looking at any of the men seated at the bar. Papa handed the mug to a man, when she felt someone staring at her. Rose looked at all of the men at the bar, and almost instantly, her eyes locked with Ben's brown eyes. Her heart skipped a beat in surprise; she had not expected him to be there.

"Well, Rose, you can start taking orders for those two couples by the window. Perfect timing, they just walked in a few moments before you did," Papa Joe said, wiping his hands on a towel. Rose just sat in a trance, locked in Ben's eyes.

"Rose?" Papa asked after she didn't make a move to go take orders.

"Oh, right," Rose said, prying her eyes away. The room immediately began to fill with electricity, and her heart wouldn't settle down. It took all her might to move her legs to walk over and take orders.

After Rose had crossed the room and began her task, Papa looked at Ben, who had his head down, watching his ale swirl in his mug.

"What was that all about?" he asked Ben.

"What was what about?" Ben asked him, trying to look confused.

Papa Joe laughed. "You like her don'tcha?"

"Who? Rose? Oh..." Ben stammered.

"Come on, admit it!"

"Yeah, I do. But I don't know how to tell her. She seems so distant, like she's way out of my league," Ben confessed, taking a swig of his ale.

"Hmmm, she's a wild one, catch her while you can," Papa Joe winked with a smile and went to the other end of the bar.

"Catch her while I can," Ben mumbled, staring at the bubbles in his ale. He then turned and watched her walk to the kitchen to fill an order, brushing loose curls from her face. Why can't I just ask her out? Why am I so nervous? And why do I feel like she's holding back on me somehow? These questions floated through his mind.

The kitchen doors wooshed open and Rose walked back through into the dinning room holding a big tray of food. She kept her eyes on the table where she was headed, and faught the urge to look at the bar, to look at Ben. She gave the people their food and walked away, trying not to notice how lovey-dovey they looked. She set the tray behind the bar and started to fill mugs as men asked her, still not looking at Ben.

"Well, Rose, I'm off. I promised my wife I'd be home tonight for Valentine's Day," Papa Joe said, padding Rose's back gently, "The cook's going to stay as late as you, and the sheriff is right down the street if you need anything."

"All right, Papa, have fun," Rose smiled, wiping up the bar. It was about nine o'clock, and the old men in the back were still playing a serious game of chess, and a few men still sat at the bar, including Ben. Why am I trying to avoid him? Because I don't want to let go and fall for him... Rose thought to herself, glancing his way every once in a while. She started to wipe off the bar, trying to look busy, too busy to talk to Ben. She stayed down on the other side of the bar, avoiding him and the weird feelings she gets around him.

Suddenly, Ben cleared his throat. "Um, Rose?"

Rose stood up straight and tried to compose herself. "Yes?" she asked, still wiping down the bar.

"Could I possibly have another ale, please?" he asked, sounding completely under control.

"Oh, yes, of course," Rose smiled, a little relieved for some reason. He sounds so collected, maybe it's just me, maybe it's all in my head. He doesn't like me, she silently thought as she filled another mug for Ben. She then handed it to him with a smile.

"Thanks," he smiled back and took a sip. "So how has your Valentine's Day been?"

Rose smiled inside. He was trying to make small talk with her, as usual.

"Fun, actually," Rose replied, now wiping down some cleaned mugs.

"Oh, so you have a Valentine, then?" Ben asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Oh, not at all!" Rose laughed, all tenseness disappearing. "Dana and Maggie took me out to lunch and to the carnival today. It was a lot of fun."

"The carnival is always fun," Ben smiled, "Have you gone on the rollercoaster?"

"No, I haven't got the nerve to," Rose said shyly, smiling.

"Me neither," Ben confesed. "But I bet if we both went together, it wouldn't be so bad."

"Maybe," Rose tensed up again and turned away from him, her smile fading.

"Whatdya say, Rose? Tomorrow night, you and me can over come our fear together," Ben said, trying to persuade her.

"Um, I..." Rose wrang the rag in her hands nervously. I can't do this, she thought. "Excuse me."

She then went into the kitchen and leaned up against the wall, closing her eyes. Jack, why can't I do this? Why am I so afraid? If I say yes, it'll be like betraying you... wouldn't it? she thought to herself. As if on que, a warmth came over her and she opened her eyes. "No, it wouldn't be. We always have eternity, and this is what I promised him," she said out loud to herself. She took a deep breath and walked back out to the bar, prepared to accept his invitation, but Ben was no where to be found. Just a small rose sat on the shiny, dark wood, with a small red card attatched. Rose picked it up and read the card: