6th June
Aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! I'm so indescribably orgasmic-ally happy right now....Adele's gonna join the band. I'm also really nervous, now that I think of it. I have no idea what the hell we're doing, but I guess we'll figure something out. It's like, everything is coming true, only really slowly and with a lot of work needed...sort of...erm, yeah...
On the downside, Tim is still being a prick and I still have my suspicions about the "other woman" (god, what a cliche term...). But I'm really past caring right now, what with the band finally starting up. I'm sure he'll be disapproving when I tell him *my* good news but...well I always found his stupid gallery openings to be incredibly boring. Maybe I'll trash one someday.
I think I'm going to ask Adele to come down over the weekend to practice and maybe write, seeing as Tim will be away for some artist thing...I don't know what the hell it is, its probably actually a secret rendezvous with his bit of stuff...!
Well, thats all. Nighty Night....Kali
Oh Lord oh Lord ohlordohlordohlord. Oh my god. I haven't even been to sleep yet. God know's what hour- it's 3:17am. Katy stormed out during the gig and pretty much left the band. Which was coming. My blowing up at her probably didn't help but I can't worry about that. In all my anger and spite and revenge, I told Kali I'd join her band. Am I not the most stupid person to walk the earth?
What have I gotten myself into? I'm in this huge state of freaking out. Alright, let's think- if it doesn't work out, and if there is no band and she has no idea of anything- then i'll find somehwere else to go. Easy. And if it works out then it works out. I wish I wasn't obsessed with money. And paying debts. And rent. But that's me. To busy freaking out to enjoy anything. God I'm awful.
But Kali's such a nice chic. She's really sweet. I don't doubt her that much. I'm just scared.
And very very alone. It's weird how much emptier 3:30am sounds compared to 3:30pm. I can hear the blood rushing in my ears. Sensible people are asleep. Not slouched over their desk scribbling away under a desk light. I have to call Pete tomorrow- er, today- and tell him to find a new regular act, cos God knows I'm not singing acapella for... for anyone. Trust Katy to just walk away.
My eyes are burning from keeping them open. Good, maybe I can squeeze in a few hours kip before I go insane.
Delly xox
8th June
Alright...I've just had a realisation. I've made so many promises to Adele and most of them probably aren't gonna work out. I mean *I* don't even know where I'm going with this enough to tell her all about the details.
Pour example...there are no other band members. We have a drummer/singer/guitarist and a pianist/singer/guitarist/jazz stylist. I guess we could be a faceless band and work from a basement somewhere in the south of France but realistically speaking...
It's all doubtful. Adele has a ton of talent but we don't even have anywhere to jump off of, we're gonna have to work from the ground up, that's how its looking now. Although I suppose Tim may have some friends in the music business....but he's being a shit now so I don't even want to think about it.
Anyway, I'm afraid to even bring this up with Adele after she basically put her life into my hands. I don't want her to doubt me as much as I doubt myself...
-kali
And the bomb drops. I just spent all of yesterday at Kali's place. Well 'Tim's' place. Who'd vanished for the weekend for some exhibition or other. Anyway, in between improvising and messing about for a while, Kali went off to get a jumper (you think in Camden they could afford heating of some sort but apparently not) and she shrieked and started freaking out.
So yknow, I scramble out from behind the dodgy keyboard I was tinkling on and find her in her room scrambling thru Tim's dirty laundry, all teary eyed. Me being myself and stupid and all that made some dicky comment about 'what's up? is there a missing sock?' and she threw the shirt she was holding at me and began yelling about the collar and how she knew and and how she hated him. Lipstick stains. She was positive they weren't her colour.
So we appear to have a bit of 'a bit on the side' happening here. Is that even a proper sentence? Ah well, things look scary. She's so ripped up about it even though she thought something like that was going on. And she has no idea who it could be. But wishes her dead anyway. And then has no idea why cos she only want's Tim for money and shelter and all that. And the occasional shag I'm sure.
I made her some tea and then left after that. I wonder if she'll blow up at him or keep hush-hush. Depends on how much she wants a roof over her head I guess. God, being single is so much sweeter.
The moment is screaming for some Tori Amos. Yum.
Del.