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Red's Crap Cooler (Eski) - Stories Of the Home Front

A TRUE STORY - You will be shocked!

'THE WORDS'
"I don't have the words..." Yep, that's right, I don't have the words, nor the ideas. This poses as a bit of a problem as I'm required to right a stroy about words. Does the story have to feature words? If so, then I could pretty much write anything. Yep, anything.
My fridge. I can use words to write about my fridge. Actually, my fridge is a pretty scary subject, there would be far to many disgusting adjectives. So I think I may ponder the subject of words.
Words can sometimes mean a lot. Sometimes they can mean nothing, like when someone saye "Sorry", but they don't mean it. People do that a lot, apologise when they're not sincere about it. It's just become second nature that when you stuff up, you say "Sorry", or when you burp during a meeting and say "Sorry", when really, you're not sorry at all and actually feel quite good about burping in the middle of someone's speech.
The meanings of lots of words have changed over the years. "Gay" used to mean happy and vibrant, now it means homosexuality. "Cool" used to mean that the temperature was low, now it means "sick", which now means "cool". Whatever happened to "Oh, that's nice"? Proper use of language has gone down the toilet. Is 'got' a word? How many 'k's are on the end of 'something'? Does 'i' come before 'e' except after 'c'? Becuase my dad told me that and I still have trouble spelling 'their' correctly.
I used to have a really big vocabulary, now it seems as though I have digressed to the vocabulary of a 10 year old. I suppose it's because I don't read as much as I used to. Books are greatm, they have words in them. Alright, this is going nowhere slowly, I'm going to talk about my fridge now...
My fridge has food in it. Apparently, that's what fridges are used for. At the moment, we have a large assortment of semi-rotten or rotting vegetables. Mum seems to think that buying perishable foods in bulk is a good thing, so we always end up with 4 kilos of celery etc dying in the vegie crisper. We actually have lots of dodgy food in there. Last week mum cooked up 5 serves of pasta for my dinner, so I could "take some to school in the week". On the first night, the pasta was alright (mum's not the best cook) by Friday lunch it was tasting a little strange. The sauce had absorbed into the pasta and made it all gluggy and gross. By Saturday, it was a no-go, yet come Monday night, and it's still in the fridge and she's planning to bake it for my lunch tomorrow. She also made today's lunch for me, last night. It apparently consisted of vegetables and rice (well, that's what she told me). All I can say is thank goodness LC didn't want the rest of her sandwich.
We made a video of the contents of my fridge a couple of years ago. We found a pumpkin, but we only knew that because that's what the sticker on the plastic said. It was purple, blue, green and yellow and had the consistency of snot. I don't know how our fridge manages to kill food, but it does.
Well, that was a lot of words about nothing. I can't think of anything to say and becoming a Tibetan monk and taking a vow of silence is looking like a pretty good option at the moment. This is really pathetic because the other night I practically wrote an entire story in my head for this topic, and it was really good too. The problem was that I wrote it whilst I was trying to get to sleep and I counldn't have been bothered getting up and writing it down. I thought "Don't worry Red, you'll remember it in the morning." That always happens, I think of something really profound, and then I forget it. I've probably invented the cure for something and forgotten it. I can start a sentence and then get to the middle of it, and then forget what I was on about in the beginning. This is particularly sad because I can still remember heaps of unimportant stuff from when I was 1 year old, including what I was wearing on the day and what I had for breakfast.
Words are really just verbal expressions of thought, which would make sense because I have no words, therefore I have no thoughts. My brother is whinging to use the computer. Now there's an animal that has never been short of words, he never shuts up. He didn't start talking until he was 3, and my parents started to believe he was Einstein reincarnated, because he apparently didn't speak until that age as well. Well, weren't they in for a rude shock! He hasn't shut up since and so far he hasn't made any contributions in science (because I do his homework). Just a note of interest here: if 'brother' is spelt wrong, spellchecker offers the replacement of 'brothel' before 'brother'. I found it amusing, don't know if you did. If you do, write me a response featuring words. It should be at least 7 pages in length and have absolutely no relevance to anything.
This is Red, all worded out.

Ok, that was a writing task I did for English. I apologise, but my page was becoming really boring compared to every one elses (oohhh, giving in to peer-pressure and conforming).