Molko let LC lean on him as they walked down the corridor towards wherever the after party was.
"Wow, there's lots of people here." Gaby said, surveying the classy room where drinks were flowing freely. She zeroed in on a certain Robbie Williams and left the group in search of her first ever shag of the story (right? she hasn't been shagged by any pop stars yet, has she?)
"So Rob. Can I...buy you a drink?" She said, making eyes at Robbo, who was already holding two bottles of heineken.
"Well..." he said, looking at his hands.
"Oh, ha...I didn't realise" Gaby said, feeling like an ass.
"Oh it's no problem, I'll buy you one. Or get you one, they're free." he replied.
Gaby's eyes lit up at the mention of free drinks. Robbie left and returned with a bottle of Foster's which Gaby chugged down (while making a distasteful face).
"So. Liked Angels." Gaby commented.
"Yeah, thats cool. Listen, do you think you could get me that girl's phone number...the one who plays the drums in Rukaland?" he asked.
"I *AM* the girl who plays the drums in Rukaland!" Gaby screamed and stomped off (and ran into Ricky Martin who was in town for the International Latino Music Awards or something)
"Rrricky! I love you!" Gaby shouted.
"Sshh, I'm trrrying to keep a low prrrofile." Ricky said (rolling his R's of course).
"Ah" Gaby nodded, quieting herself.
"Excuse me but isn't it a bit egotistical for Ricky to say a thing like that when no one here even cares who he is?" Jess butted in.
Everyone in the room nodded and the story continued.
"Oh Molko darling, hold me" LC said, slumping onto a loveseat.
Molko obediently sat down beside her and began to pat her head. 12 hours together and she's already got him whipped, nice job LC.
Kali milled about casually having conversations with various rock stars and pissing off various super models. Jess had found someone who had connections with Radiohead.
"So, is Thom REALLY an alien abductee?"
Red grew tired of the party atmopshere and decided to go out into the empty tour bus to cleanse her aura. But instead she started playing Kali's video games. By now LC and Molko were in an advanced state of foreplay on the loveseat (apparently the mercyndol had kicked in).
"We need to go somewhere" Molko whispered, all hot and all wonderful into LC's ear as he madly groped. (how's this for a shag scene, LCers? ;) So yeah they ran off to the bathroom and got it on several times in their own private stall.
"You know Molko baby we really need to time things better" LC said as she straightened out her clothing and touched up her make up in the mirror.
Molko nodded.
"I really need sleep." LC said, examining the circles underneath her eyes.
"Your wish is my command" Molko said, sweeping LC off her feet and carrying her out to the tour bus, where they both slept in bliss in LC's lovely bunk.
Meanwhile Gaby was actually making it with Ricky Martin. He was fairly drunk and they were having quite a good time.
"So I've got a hotel room just next door" Ricky said.
"So take me there." Gaby said, intrigued.
Ricky unlocked the door to his room and sat down on the bed. Gabs could hardly contain her excitement. The first official shag of the story. Then Ricky turned on the TV to watch Later With Jools Holland.
"What are you doing?" Gabs asked, trying to compose herself.
"Well I thought you wanted to chill out." Ricky said. "I mean I know how hectic it gets on tour and stuff."
"Yeah" Gaby nodded, obviously pissed off.
She began to raid the mini-bar.
"What? You thought I brrrought you up herrre to...to, you know?" Ricky asked.
Gaby nodded, trying to contain her apparent rage.
"I thought you knew I was gay!!" Ricky shouted.
And here's where the south american temper comes in and all hell breaks loose. Jools finds himself flying out the window as Gaby beats Ricky over the head with a chair and leaves him soaking in the shower as the cold water runs.
"Well, that was interesting." Gaby said, stepping back into the party and looking quite pleased with herself. Kali had spotted Liam's friend Richard and was keeping a lookout for the others.
"Well hi there! Fancy meeting you here!" Some Welsh guy shouted, making Kali spill half of her drink down Helena Christensens back.
"Wow, small world." Kals said, trying to get away.
"Yeah, really! Hey, I'm sure Liam would love to see you, why don't you come on over? The whole gang's over there." said Chris (Liam's mate) pointing to a table.
Kali looked over and actually smiled seeing the whole lot of 'em having a good time. So she worked up the nerve to go over and say hi.
"Hi." said Kali.
"Kali? Is that you?" Liam said, pushing his chair back.
Kali nodded, trying not to turn bright red.
"Well, shit, mate!" he got up and gave Kals a big hug which made her feel loads better.
"You remember everyone, right? Everyone, remember Kals? My bestest pal in the whole world." He winked.
Kali forced herself to smile.
And now for the totally mediocre turn of events.
"You remember Jenny, right?" Liam said, putting his arm around a totally snotty looking blonde chick.
"Oh, yeah" Kali said, giving Jenny a little wave.
"We're back together" Liam whispered.
"Oh" Kali mouthed.
"Well you know wot I really have got to go now 'cos I dont' see any of my other band mates around anymore..." Kali said making up a quick excuse.
"But isn't that the bass player right over there?" Liam asked, pointing.
"Nope never seen her in my life see ya" Kali said, running off back to the tour bus.
(LC's bit) LC felt herself being shaken awake. She looked up into Kali's face and thought 'no, this can't be right. i swear i'm with molko'. She closed her eyes again but Kali began to hit her awake.
"Ow! Stop it you bitch!" She sat up, relieved to see that Molko was wrapped around her. Phew. The mercyndol hadn't knocked her completely sideways.
"What are you looking so happy about?" Kali fumed.
"I thought the mercyndol had screwed me over and that I'd shagged you but then i realised I hadn't so I'm ok now. What's up?" LC asked.
"What's up?!? What's up is the fact that *Liam* has gotten back together with *Jenny*!" Kali shrieked.
LC seemed to recall a chat she'd had with Kali about the 'bitch ex girlf'. She nodded.
"Right, well that isn't very good is it?" LC concluded.
Molko woke up. "Liam Gallagher is having it off with Jenny McCarthy?"
"No!!!" Kali exploded, scrambling into the bunk. "My Liam is back together with his ex girlfriend!" She grabbed Molko's shoulders and began to shake him. "Do you have *any* idea how hurt I am? Do you have *any* idea how shitty things have become? Do you? Do you?"
LC ripped her off Molky. "Ok Kals. Just relax. They aren't married yet so-"
Kali gave her a glare.
"So there's still room for improvement. I guess we've come to the part in the story where you'll have to think of a plan to win him back, while I go and create a funny situation for Jess and Red. Oh and Gaby." LC thought.
At that moment, Gaby stumbled into the tour bus. "This sux! I was so close, and he turned out to be gay."
Red blinked. "Robbie's gay?"
"No!" Gaby sobbed as she slumped onto a seat. "Ricky is. Gay as they come."
Lc restrained Molko who tried to scramble out of the bunk. "You're with *me* ok?"
"Oh well... it's not like you're never going to see him again. He is your cousin after all." Red shrugged.
"Shhh!!!" Gaby said. "I don't want everyone knowing that I have contacts with him, as well as a crush on him."
LC pinned Molko to the corner of the bunk who was trying desperately to get out.
Meanwhile, a rather smug looking Jess wandered in.
"Oi! Why are you so fucking chipper?" Kali asked.
"Oh you know." Jess grinned.
"Er... no I don't." Kali said. "That's why I'm asking."
Lc looked over at Kali. She was still in her bunk. Sitting on her legs. Stopping the blood circulation.
"Kali, could you get out of my bunk now? Please?"
Gaby exploded. "What if I killed him?!?"
Jess looked at Gaby. "Oh this sounds good."
Kali scrambled over to Jess. "Answer my question! You never look chipper. Except now you are."
Red groaned. "Oh let me guess. You got talking to that dude who knows Radiohead and he told you about some organisation charity thing in which if you get enough sponsors you are eligible to have Thom's babies."
Jess frowned. "How the hell did you know that? You weren't even in the room!"
LC and Molko looked at each other. "Wow, that's pretty dodgy."
Molko nodded. "That's more dodgy than the fact that I'm here with you in a tourbus after an after show party and shall be here for a while seeing as we're on tour together and your friend has killed Ricky Martin while your other one is on love with a Welsh boy she can't have and your other one is playing video games while she cleanses her aura."
LC kind of nodded. "I suppose." And pulled Molko ontop of her.
Red's mobile phone rang. She answered it.
LC pushed Molko off her so that she could scream "Look everyone! Contradiction moment!"
Everyone looked at the resident Indian hippy dressed in paisley with a bowl of tofu in front of her chatting miles away onto her brand new Nokia mobile phone with yellow casing.
Kali shook her head. "Imagine that. Spirituality and technology." And she dragged Jess to the back of the bus.