Can Tab


"Drinking soda in an alley...," Reno sighed. "It should be beer."

"No drinking on duty," Rude replied flatly, taking a sip from his can of Dr. Mog.

"If you ask me, I think I perform better drunk."

"I beg to differ..."

Reno answered this by sticking out his tongue. He then noticed that Rude was twisting the tab on his soda can over and over. "So you're playing that game huh? Aren't you a little old for that?"

Rude was caught off guard by this, as if he hadn't actually realised what he was doing. "Hmm? I-"

"You don't have to say it partner. I know what you're doin'. Tryin' to get it to snap off at "T". Heheheh..."

Rude nearly choked on air, his cheeks feeling flushed. He was tongue-tied by this, unable to say a word.

"See," Reno began, "The trick is to give the chick you like a buncha nicknames. That way you up your chances of the tab coming off on the right letter."

Rude thought that was cheating. But then again this was coming from Reno so he shouldn't be surprised.

"Now I'm not saying you need 25 nicknames. A guy like you would probably get the tab off long before you hit the middle. Skip "A" to make it a little more fair. So you could maybe nickname her "Boobs".

Again, Rude was speechless, unable to make more than a small choking sound.

Reno felt bad. "Aww, hey man, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to dis your girl like that. You know that right?"

Rude nodded a reply. It was just Reno being Reno after all. He said stupid things all the time. Wait, did Reno just call Tifa 'his' girl? Rude just downed the rest of his soda. He suddenly felt very hot and the cool liquid was a welcome remedy. But it was rather difficult because there was still half a can left and he wasn't accustomed to gulping things down so quickly. He wasn't Reno after all.

Reno however didn't notice this. He was too busy gulping down his own soda before letting out a satisfying burp. "Ahh! That hit the spot! Next time let's get a six pack."

"I think we should be heading back," Rude said quietly.

"Yeah yeah. Time flies when you're having fun."

Rude tossed his can in the trash as they headed through the alley. Reno was behind him, walking slower than usual. When Rude didn't hear him close behind he turned his head to see what was going on. The red head was fiddling with his empty can, deep in concentration.

"What are you doing?"

"Heh, well whaddaya know..."

"What?"

"Guess what, partner?" Reno beamed.

Rude raised an eyebrow in response.

The red head held up the can tab. "It came off on 'R'! It's too bad you don't have boobs man. Too damn bad."

Rude didn't reply. He just picked up his pace a little. Reno caught up to him quickly as usual.

"Heheheh... I was just imagining you with boobs. I bet they'd be huge. You know, since you're a pretty big guy. Probably bigger than Ti- Oh, sorry man. Really I-"

Rude shook his head. "Don't worry about it."

"So you're not all flustered anymore?"

Rude shrugged. He really just wanted to get off the subject already. So he moved on to something else. "Flustered? Since when do you say flustered?"

"I heard it on some TV show. Sounded like a cool word. Thought I'd try it. You know, spice up my vocabulary. Chicks dig that sort of thing."

Rude shrugged. He really didn't think women cared how many fancy words you knew. But if it made Reno happy, then good for him. "Maybe I should get you a dictionary."

"Nah. Too many pages and not enough pictures."

"Then I'll get you 'Fun With Dick and Jane'."

"What's that? Some kinda porno book?"

Rude smirked. "I thought you were supposed to be smart now?"

"Look, if you're buyin' porn I want videos."

Rude didn't know whether to laugh at this or not. Reno was joking right? He couldn't really think that kiddie book was pornographic literature. "How about if I just buy you a drink later?"

"How about a pizza too?"

"Deal."

~Fin~

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