im too lazy to write a title
"God will never take away something without giving you something better in it's place."
Tuesday, April 8, 2003 8:33 PM
Did dan die or something? where is he? he has not been in school for the past 2 days! i guess that's hypocritical for me to say though, cuz i went a whole 8 weeks at the beggining of the year not being here 5 days in a row. still. ugh!
okay ANYWAYS...Aloha mes copains, i have not written in a while i see. i actually had an entry from last thursday, but when i read it it didn't make any sense and was all whiny anyway, so i decided to delete it. maybe i should learn to better-phrase what im trying to say.
hey! spring break is at the end of the week! yay! i cannot wait for easter. =) but i guess i should fill you guys in a little about the past instead of jumping to the future, i mean, my last entry was when LES MIS was going on! heehee. anyway.
after les mis, i auditioned for the hobbit and steel magnolias. i got the part of Kili in the hobbit along with my twin, bria,(she was fili,) which my sister claims was a cast made in heaven. lol. so true. i didn't get into steel but i got callbacks, which made me very happy anyway. i also came to a lot of their workparties after hobbit was over and ushered on sat. the 29 and fri. the 4th. they even had a little insert saying they forgot to put mine and ali's name in the program! i was so thrilled. lol that sounds really dorky, but oh well. now i am involved in the talent show with my buddies bria, laura C, julia F, lizzie B, and laura K(who keeps calling me loopy six crackers and it's really annoying!! >=|. we are going to preform cell block tango from chicago. =), which makes me happy. DO COME SEE IT ON APRIL 25TH, YES? heehee. also, my situtation with dan seems to have much improved, which makes me very VERY happy. now that i reflect on it, it IS a lot different... for a while i couldn't talk to him because i liked someone else and i didn't know what to do and i was all stressed out, etc, but im sure i like him that much anymore (the other person i mean, dan's the best! =]) now dan and i talk a lot more, it seems, and.. i dunno. we seem closer i guess. works for me! i also am better friends w/ caroline than at the beggining of the year (whoopee!!) except i can't really talk on the phone with anyone anymore. and kara and i don't have any real dividers any longer (i dunno if i mentioned that...) now charlie's a lot nicer too, except for the fact that he disses drama people every chance he gets. maybe he'll get over it though. i think i covered most of it.... oh yeah, the whole caroline going out with sam thing but he's kinda clingy and she didn't really like him so she dumped him. then he started going out with kara t. god, does sam have a goal to go out with every freshman girl in the school? that's kinda creepy. oh yeah, kara t dumped him too, which i can understand why but i guess i do feel a little bad... i mean, he IS a nice guy and all.
now on to the future. im trying out for the one- acts on april 28+29! whoo-hoo!! yay. and i really wish i could go out with dan this year.... but even if i got up the nerve to ask him, would he even say yes? meh. tommorrow will be 2 months 'till his birthday. (the sad part about that is that i know it, not him). hehe. stalker kathleen >=). lol. also, in case i use this or in case u read caroline's journal too. lately, dan's been dong this "O-M-G" thing... *sigh* he likes to write it in the air (with two explanation points!)... ANYway. also, you know what was wierd? the other day, when we were walking out side for lunch, i said that i was poor and HE said that that wasn't something you would normally say, and after i said that i wasn't a normal person, he said "That's true.... that's cuz ur my bestest friend kathleen!" and he put his arm around me. it was so strange and un-dan! (but at the same time, the greatest feeling in the world =])but it was wierd! i know he's never remember it though.... meh! i don't think it REALLY means anything, but i wish it did.....*sigh* ugh dan! come back to school! =(
speaking of school.... it's not that fun anymore. i guess it wouldn't be fun if i didn't have school at all, because i wouldn't see my friends or have anything to do, but still. i miss the days when i didn't make myself do homework. i got 5 A's and 2 B's last quarter!! yay! 3rd quarter i got 5 B's, 2 A's and a C EH. oh well. im going for straight A's 4th quarter (i hope i hope i hope!!). damnit, grayson wants her calculator bck tommorrow too, and i have a test. ee!! sorry that was kinda random. oh yeah! and i forgot to mention- grayson and i were on really bad terms for a while back in the day (like in feb) which was kinda my fault cuz i was mad but i had good reason to be! we're all good now though. i hate oz.
sorry, had to get that out. well.... i don't really HATE him, i'd just rather not be around him, i hate what he did to grayson though. (long story don't ask). .....ugh let's get off the subject of Oz (yes... lets, schizophrenic kathleen...) i guess i should talk a little about rehearsal.... well, it's going okay. we have all of the dance done, and it's awesome, but im afraid that we might end up cutting some of it for the talent show since there are 29 acts and it's 7 minutes and 30 secs. long. *sigh* also, someone keeps missing rehearsal (i.e. laura koran). she came to the last one though, so it's all good for now. we're going costume shopping on monday!! whoo hoo!! =) wow. i haven't been to the mall in FOREVER! last year i used to go 2x a month! yeah.... those were the days. i wish they would have let me make the costumes though. i don't see what the problem would have been. i CAN do it. maybe they just don't believe in me. oh well, at least i get to make tali and ali's!! =) that'll be fun. speaking of them... ugh! i want a voice trainer so badly! not ali's though, because i want to take it from the same guy my sister takes it from, cuz my church chior director knows him =). and cuz he knows my sister, duh. and tali takes an acting class i wish i could take (wich i need to - i mean, look at my acting skills!) but i simply don't have the money. it bothers me that some people can just do whatever tey want.. meh! i want ot be like that. i might get a job over the summer though, so that would help a lot. I'm going to australia this summmer!! yay!!! they moved my delegation to july 24, which means i might be able to work at a summer camp maybe... i hope!! .... ugh. i have to go do homework, but i shall continue writing through the month, or at least try. sorry this entrey was so boring, but i DID mostly have to fill you in on stuff. *sigh* ugh! i hate homework!!
Wednesday, April 9, 2003 6:42 PM
Where the f*ck is dan? ugh!!!!
sorry bout that, but he wasn't here AGAIN today! *sigh* i wish i could say something incredibly amazing happened today, but it really didn't. hmm.... i had a talent show comittee meeting.... that i went to... yeah. that's about it. i probably shouldn't even be bothering to type now either considering i have to go to chior in 10 minutes, but that's okay. i guess the only thing that really happened today, other than the meeting, was in theatre. You see, we have to do these wierd...er... things where you find contrasting words in one of your lines from the scenes we're all doing. for example, bria's line was: he's wise enough to play the fool. and so on and so forth. then, we had to act out those words. but not act them out by saying them with our lines, oh no, we had to act as if we WERE the word. As if the word had a shape, and we had to portray it. It's actually a lot harder than it seems. I swear, i probably spent the most time up there. im not sure why, either. i mean, i just couldn't get it, and mr.boswell asked me why i wasn't "taking his advice," and not thinking about my actions and doing them, but i just can't do that. I can't NOT THINK about something before i do it. I have an intuition, but only in the sense of ideas that suddenly pop into my head, and then i act on those ideas. mr. boswell also said i was tense and "needed to let go, man."then he started dancing. yes.... And when i started moving around to get ideas he said i looked like i needed to go to the bathroom.
Ha. ha. ha.
then, i don't know why, but i got really upset about it. i have no idea why though! but i was almost about to cry, and i was biting my lip in frustration, and part of the reason i didn't want to say my words was because i was afraid i would burst into tears, but i had no idea why!! ugh. mr boswell said i was too tense. "...such concentration.." he said, when i was just standing there having no idea what to do.
i think he's picked up on the idea that i think too much.
oh well, no matter. im getting upset just writing about it, and that's pretty sad.. also i have to go to chior. *sigh* au revior!!
Thursday, April 10, 11:32 PM
Ugh! why is dan not here? meh. he's either pretty damn sick or he's taking an early spring break. i think i'll go with the latter. *sigh*
I find it interesting how on the nights in which i have no homework and don't HAVE to stay up late, i do anyway. oh well. tommorrow's the last day before spring break!!! whoo-hoo!! i have to do so much work over spring break though. oh, the irony.
ooh my mum's home! heehee. sorry that was kinda random. but the reason im up is that i have to finish these costume designs and because charlotte's in the shower, so i can't take one. i also just talked to sheila for about an hour AND watched ER, for the first time in..... a few weeks actually. a big fear i have is that that'll be the only time i get to again because my teacher's will all go crazy after break about studying for finals. eeeee!! not that they weren't crazy b4. like today, when mrs. jones wouldn't let us finish our tests- and over half the class hadn't finished! when i told her that it was unfair, because that's simply only testing how fast we can answer questions rather than how much we know, she said that if we took that long than we obviously didn't know them. i then said that i probably got almost all of them right, i just take a long time to do tests, and she had the weakest argument EVER she said "How many timed tests do you take in a lifetime?" or at school, im not sure because by then i was so upset i wasn't really into listening. literally, about 5 or 6 people actually finished the test. it was so unfair! i lost over 16 points because there was a chart in the back that i DIDN'T GET TO! ugh! i finally broke down crying outside my locker, grayson was there to console me. what's wrong with me this year? i hate crying! hmm....
maybe i have a lot of built up anger
err... uh... sadness i mean. yes. im sure.
talking with sheila helped a lot today too.... ya know. that "get everything out" sorta thing. i do plan to change the rules so that there's one about how long test-taking times can be. that's just not fair at all.
besides, if everyone in mrs. jones' class fails, she's the one who gets fired. also, if kids don't know anything on the test and can't finish it in time, which she "claims" happened, then she's the one who taught us badly. that would make sense too, because while ms. jones does explain some things, she leaves a lot left out that we end up being confused on because she's not really that great of a teacher. she's just a person who gives us a lot of homework and reading. seriously, she makes us learn from the book, she can't bother to teach us herself.
well mes amis, i would continue complaining about my boring life, but i really do have to go. i sahll see you...er... write you later!
Friday, June 27, 2003 12:57 PM
haven't written in a while, have i? hehe. sorry bout that. grrr im bored. there's really nothing to do. usually i eat when im bored but for the first time in a while i'm really not that hungry. everything's really uninteresting because i don't have any health homework to procrastinate against. *sigh* this is sad. my journal is either really crazy and depressing or just... kinda boring. hmm... well, i SHOULD be cleaning my room, which is precisely the reason why im sitting here, writing. lol, my motivation is so pathetic.
i really want to be hanging out with some of my friends now (i.e. dan) or going ice skating tonight ( which i hope would mostly be spent talking to dan) but i must attend the MTC production of les mis. don't get me wrong, i do wanna see it, but i would have rather been IN it really. and im proud of and happy for ali and all, but it'll be kinda hard watching her play the role i wanted so badly. meh.I AM SO BORED!!!! at least health gives me something to do (or rather many things, because everything other than homework is more fun when you have homework to do). and all im doing is surfing the web. there's gotta be SOMETHING to do in this house (that isn't watching jenny jones with alice)! argh! well im not going to bore you with my own boredom, and describing the past wouldn't even be make sense if i wrote it, so c ya laterz. i'll probably catch you up when i have time. (ha....ha...)