True To Life Meanderings Of A Tortured Soul (Part 4)
Previously
In another alleyway
In a different town
Dusk closing in on another day
I walk along looking for discarded clothing
Peering into dumpsters and trash cans
A new shirt and some shoes would help a lot
So I continue my search
Someone is yelling at her husband
A door slams somewhere ahead of me
Off in the distance a siren sings its mournful song
The light is fading fast now
and the rain has begun to fall
I will have to give up my search and go 'home'
I start back down the alley toward the street
But something is wrong
I don't know what it might be
But my nerves are all standing on end
Becoming jittery
I pause by a gate in a fence and look back the way I came
Nothing but gathering darkness and deep shadows
I peer ahead into the gloom of oncoming night
And see nothing
Senses shouting to run, I try to shake it off and
Make up my mind to start walking again
But before I can make that first step I hear it:
Footsteps
Slow and quiet
I can't tell if they are behind or ahead so I stay put
Hoping the gloom will hide me from view
Hair raising on the back of my neck
Muscles tensed to make a mad dash for the street
Silence
Waiting
I hear a small sound to my right, turn
He is there, not 5 feet from me
I see his shape outlined against the dim glow of a porch light
Fear grips my heart with an icy hand and I run
But he is ready for that and quickly catches me
One arm around my neck and the other holding my arms
Tight against my body
Hot sour breath on my cheek
I try to kick out with my feet
And he tightens the grip on my neck
Whispers in my ear
'Do ya wanna to die?'
I shake my head quickly, gasping for breath
'Then cut the shit or I'll stick ya,
make ya suffer before ya die, got it?'
Nod
Fear turns into terror as he moves me between
A parked car and a fence
Pushes me down to the ground
Making sure I see the knife in his right hand
He puts the tip against my throat
With the other hand he begins to remove my jeans
Roughly cuts through my panties
Digging a long shallow gouge in my left thigh
I tell myself to just let him get it done with
And I will be ok
Just get it over as quickly as possible
And everything will be ok
He roughly shoves my legs apart and
Positions himself between
He cuts through my shirt
From collar to waist
Slicing my chest and stomach as he does so
And he begins to take what he wants from me
One hand covering my mouth
The other holding the knife against me
The knife is digging into my left cheek
Just below my eye
He holds it there firmly
Steadily pushing it across my cheek and
Up to my forehead
Then he brings it down to my left breast and
Slices across to the right one
His rhythm picks up speed and with it
The knife moves faster across various parts of my flesh
I try to move away and he pushes the knife
Into my side, below the ribcage
Searing hot agony courses through my body
I scream against his hand as again he pushes the knife in
He stabs a third time and shudders as his orgasm takes him
Then he is gone and I lie there, bleeding
Rain falling in my face
In a patch of bloody weeds
Between a car and a fence
In a grimy alley
Behind a row of ill-kept houses
Alone
Bakersfield, CA 1994
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