The Dark Journey
Chapter 27 - A Phone Call



deep inhalation of breath
shuddering exhale
cold sweats hands shake
mind racing through
old memories, ancient myths
was it real or imagined?
can't even tell anymore
let it flow
tumbling words
falling in cascade
my own voice grows dim
bile spewing forth
wracked with agony
spasms convulsions exhalations
ripping them out heedlessly
casting them on the floor
stains on the carpet
she gasps in ... what?
dismay? disbelief?
no ... disgust
the same disgust i hold myself in
as i lay here on this couch
and she sits
pen in hand floating above
the yellow notepad
and i wonder to myself
after all is said and done
who will clean up this mess?
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Well, without going into the details, I can say that I scraped up $80.00 over the next two days. Both my body and my mind protested this means of money making. I couldn't do it anymore. I had hit the wall and there was no other way to go. I spent most of my time either huddled under the bridge or wandering the stores and restaurants, taking sink baths where I could. I looked ragged in my dirty, worn out jeans, with my hair unbrushed, mostly unwashed. I desperately needed to get together enough money at least to see a doctor. My back and sides weren't quite as painful as they had been, but they were still sore. My left foot badly needed attention. And always there was the child to think about. How much damage had I already done? I was half starved and living in the cold. Those couldn't be good for a pregnancy. I had to do something soon or lose everything I had escaped for.

Passing by the Mini-Mart, I was drawn towards the payphone. I stood in front of it for a long time, minutes? hours? I don't know how long. I thought about my mother. I could call home. What would that mean though? Mark was still there, probably, and I couldn't go back to that. There was one other person I felt I could call. I dialed information and got the number for the second hand shop in Modesto. Then I stood staring at the phone for another long period of time, asking myself if there was any other way out of this mess I had put myself in. The answer, of course, I already knew. I called collect, person to person, to Rachel McGuinnes.

When she finally picked up, after what seemed like an eternity but was probably only 20 seconds or so, I couldn't say anything. I stood staring at the wall of the convenience store with the phone in one hand and the scrap of paper with the number written on it in the other and the tears flowed like a river down my cheeks. My own name echoing in my ears finally pulled me back, and I blurted out "Rachel, God, I need help Rachel. I don't know what to do and I'm stuck here and there's nothing ... no one ... and oh Jesus ... please ... "

I knew I was babbling but I couldn't stop myself. I don't know how long I went on before her voice finally called me back.

"Jenny! You have to tell me where you are, okay? What is going on? Is it your stepfather? Jenny!"

"Rachel? What do I do Rache? I'm lost and I don't know where to go from here and ... I'm pregnant. I think he was going to kill me ... but I got out ... I ran again like I promised I wouldn't ... but he didn't catch me this time. Can you help me? I just need to know what to do, okay? Just tell me what to do ... please ..."

"Where are you? That's first. I can't help unless I know where you are!"

"Colorado ... ummm Grand Junction Colorado ..."

"Okay. Do you have a place to stay there? An address where I can send something to you?"

"No ... "

"Well, I'm sure they have a telegraph office there, Western Union. Can you find the Western Union office? I can wire money to you, but you have to do exactly as I tell you, okay? Can you do that Jenn?"

"Anything ... Rache ... anything ... just ... tell me .. okay?"

"Okay, first, are you okay, physically okay?"

"Ummm ... I ... think I have some broken ribs maybe ... and ... my toe's gone ... "

"First thing you do then is get to the hospital after you get the wire, okay? I'm going to call a friend of mine in Denver. She can help you if you can get over there. Now, tell me who did this to you? Was it Mark?"

"No ... not Mark ... " I began telling her what I could. After I had gotten as much of it out as I could, she told me to look up the address and phone number of the Western Union office and give them to her. I didn't have any Identification, so she said she would call the WU office and give them a description of me and instructions for them to call her when I came in to pick up the wire. She asked how much money I had on me. I told her I had maybe $75 left. She told me to get a motel room, no arguments, if they gave me a hard time I was to have them call her. She gave me her home phone number.

"Jenn? If I do this, you have to do everything I tell you to do, okay? You aren't going to disappear again on me, and I don't think you'll need to worry about Jake or Mark finding you. You can have your life back if you do as I say now. Will you promise?"

"Yes ... I'll do anything you say ... "

"Go the WU office tomorrow morning. Then call me when you get done with the doctors. We are going to have a lot to talk about. Are you going to be okay for tonight?"

"Yes." I said through my sobs and tears. "Rache? I love you Rache ... okay? Thanks for ... for helping me ... I don't know what I would do ... "

"I love you too Jenny. Now go on. You have a long road ahead and this is just the beginning of it. I know you though, I know how strong you really are, Jenn. Even if you don't believe it, you're one of the strongest people I've ever met. I'll talk to you in the morning, okay?"

"Okay ... thank you ... bye."

"Good bye Jenn. God is watching you. You're safe."


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