The Dark Journey
Chapter 22 - Another Birthday
Total darkness
too dark even for shadows
pitch blackness surrounds
palpable, alive in its own existence
full of fear and hate and loathing
for creatures of the light
suddenly, a flame
flares up through the blackness
burns for only a few seconds
and then is extinguished
but it leaves behind
an orange/red glow
that flares and diminishes, rhythmically
but still the darkness hates the glow
and turns it in upon itself
through its force of will
scathes its owner with searing agony
and leaves me in a shaking huddled mass
of torn and broken emotion
lying on the floor
in total darkness
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One day in mid August Jaker loaded me up in his Dodge 4x4 pickup and we went to what he called a 'rip-snortin pig roast bar-b-que extravaganza'. It was just the guys and me. I remember that the rancher had saved the pig?s blood in a large bucket and while they waited for the pig to roast, and after they had all had me at least once, I was tied to a table and forced to drink the blood. They covered my body with it and then took a cow inseminator and filled me with it several times. Then they left me there while they drank beer and bullshitted outside.
Sometime later Jaker and the rancher came back in. Jaker asked me if I would like to clean up a bit, maybe a shower? I did, I really did, so I said so. They untied me and took me outside. The other 6 or 7 guys were all standing there in a kind of loose semi-circle, and Jaker pushed me down to the ground in the middle and they all urinated on me. I recall just wanting to die and have this all over with. When they were done they left me lying there in the muck and went to eat their dinner.
I laid there for a long time, not daring to move, until Jaker came over with a plate of food and set it on the ground in front of me. I reached out for the plate and he stepped down on my hand and said 'Not yet, I forgot the gravy.' He urinated on the food and then stood over me telling me to 'Eat up'. I made to move away and he kicked me in the side and told me if I didn't eat I'd get a lot more of the same. I ate.
They hosed me off and scrubbed me with some kind of animal soap I think. It stank. I was taken back into the barn where they all had their fun with me again. Then the rancher led a horse over ....
I was 19.
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