This section contains the lst diary entries anyone will see. I have decided that this experiment in honesty has gone on far enough! It didn't get me in too much trouble, just a bit here and there.
But I will be moving my newer diary entries to a a site just for myself. So you can all stop worrying now.
You can email me Alastair McGowan, right back there on my name!
Monday 15:20 hours. I was thinking of giving up on this diary for a while. I just have so much crap to deal with at the moment, all this page does is remind me of it when I sit down to write. I guess that is why I have written so little of late.
But things just keep going all over the place. Driving me mad, bit by bit. I have 2 months by the end of which I should know where I am going, and how to get there. If everything goes according to plan, and when does that ever happen?
Writing this page used to help me deal with shit, but there comes a point where it just becomes a burden. I would rather this page didn't turn in to a list of everything that is going wrong in my life, with nothing positive in it. That would piss me off!
So this month I have Stuart enthusing about buying a play station 2, I am trying to explain to him that all the rent money I am getting off of Chris is needed to pay bills, keep the flat ours, and it is barely enough to do that each month. But this might take a while to sink in.
It has been ages since I just went out shopping for clothes, okay that is because I don't have the money to go shopping for anything. But I really want to go shopping! I need new clothes.
I went out at the weekend for dinner with my folks and brother. Had a lovely meal at Antii Pasti, the one just off of Suchiehall street. After we went to see a production of Oliver.
I had a great time that night, it was nice to spend time with my folks. I don't really see much of them these days.
The production was fantastic. It seemed a bit rough in places, but was carried through by a very enthusiastic cast of actors. And they managed to pass that enthusiasm along to the crowd.
I don't go to the theatre often at all, I used to love it, but you need money to these things. A bit like the rest of the stuff I can't do and want to.
Tomorrow I need to find my cheque book and send one off for the gas, go pay the phone bill. See where my balance stands after that. It will be bad though, I can tell these things!
So you see what I mean, this entry has been a weird one. Because I had something good to write about, but the bad is still outweighing the good. By a long shot.
Chin high and deal with it. It has worked for the past year. I feel like I am carrying this great weight around with me all the time. It gets taken off every so often when I get the chance to go out and have fun, but it is right back there in the morning.
So in conclusion, I guess I will stick with doing the page at the rate I am now, about an entry a week should be enough to cover me. I guess if I feel the need I can always write more.
I feel like hitting my head on the wall,
Al
It is Sunday night, I have had a great day all told. I went to see the Scottish Claymores again. Always a great day out.
The match was a tough one for the home team. We were being humped by the end of the first half. We scored first, placing three on the board on the opening drive. Only to be hammered by in to the ground by two touchdowns!
In the end we lost 14-9, thanks to a poor show on part of the offence. However our defence pulled their socks on at half time and went to town. A bit late though.
Thursday was the general election. The day when power gets placed back in the hands of the people. It was just as I predicted, labour in with an easy majority. With Lib dems gaining seats,a nd the concervatives doing quite badly. Their stance on the anti-europe front is not going to do them any good in the future.
They have to realise that it is going to happen, it is just a case of when. If it doesn't happen along with the rest of Europe then our economy will suffer as a result.
Anyway, I have had a great weekend, filled with many movies, lots of drink and some fine company as usual. What more could you ask for? Not too much, maybe some drugs. But I wasn't even that fussed.
It has been weird living an 18 hour day. Weird indeed, just not used to it, the old dope tends to keep me fairly mild and easy to sleep, without it it can be tricky to get to sleep, especially with my fucking over active brain. But on the plus side it means that I am up late enough to write stuff for the diary. Even if it is all pish.
So my Star Wars campaign at gugs is finished. No more gugs for me I think, maybe gugathons and the nationals. And of course the best bit, the bar after. But no more roleplaying at gugs, bored of it. I think I will try and find something else to do with my Tuesday, at least until bar time at 9pm ish.
There must be more to write here, but I guess not. I could go in to more detail about my weekend, but I wont bother. Except to say that I saw the Goonies on video on Friday. Ace, fantastic, despite what anyone else may ever say about it. A true 80's classic. Glad to have it in my video collection, at long last.
Night ya all,
Al
It is almost midnight, and I am just starting to feel human again. Last night was a night of excess. Too much drink, by quite a long shot. Left me sooo drunk I was still in bad shape when I woke up this morning.
But hey never mind, I did have a great time last night. Tomorrow I have to go in to the town and see the mortgage people. I really need to get this sorted now. No more putting it off, or finding excuses for not going to see them.
I was going to run 3d&d this Sunday, but I have just sent off an email to all my players cancelling the game. It had slipped my mind completely, but the Claymores are playing this Sunday. So since I have a standing arrangement with Ewan to go and see them, that is what I shall do. That and I really want to go and see the game, it is always a great day out.
Besides I have to go and cheer for the team and all that. They have never lost a game when I have been to see them. Okay that is because their home record has always been good. But that is not the point. The point is I am going, and nothing can stop me. Just try and see.
I am hoping that with the dawn of a new month shall come a new lease of life for me. I just sent off an open university coupon, so they can send some info and a course prospectus. I need to get back to doing something with my life. And fast.
So here I am writing what will be the first of a full months worth of diary entries. Or so I hope. But no point relying on hope to get things done, I guess I will just have to use a bit of discipline.
I have a few things still to do for 3d&d, I am sure we will be able to play next Sunday. I need to do a cut scene, finish off the scenario, and come up with npc names and do a bit more background work.
How am I feeling? I am no really sure, it is tricky to say. Given that I feel like crap due to all the drinking last night. I guess right now I feel hazy, I will write some more when I can actually think straight.
This is me signing off,
Al
To the archives, not as catchy as, 'to the bat mobile'. But it will do.