drank

again.

...

to that point
of oblivion

dialed his number

hung up

dialed it again

'hello' he said
'hello, hello'
(looking all the while at his caller id?)
i said,
(ready?)

'i can't stop loving you, you asshole!'
and hung up.

and called again.

got his machine. said:
'i'm sorry i called you an asshole.
but the rest
still stands.
and..will.'

that's what i did
last night.

.

.

.

.

i come from a long line of
hard-drinking, hard-living, moonshine-making alcoholic
redneck bigamists from somewhere beyond
godforsaken, two wrong turns off
the appalachian trail.
bad shit in my blood.
and so.
i

must stop drinking. started again.

now must stop again.

must.

.

.