A Slightly Misplaced Gerbil



A/R: In the process of writing End of the Line – Part 8, I had to take a break (again). Part of this fic actually did happen to me last night. I’m sure you can figure out which parts did. If not, may God have mercy on you. Before reading this, you may want to read Propaganda, my other cliché. There are references to stuff that happened then. Or, if you don’t read it before reading this, at least read it afterwards so you’re not still completely confused.

A Slightly Misplaced Gerbil

I had almost fallen back asleep again, but couldn’t quite manage, considering I had a headache that felt like a sumo wrestler was sitting on my head. After tossing and turning a few hundred more times, I started hearing the voices…

VOICE 1: Shh… don’t wake her up yet.

VOICE 2: Ron, you idiot, she’s probably already awake after what we went through trying to get this gerbil *he indicates the furry little rodent squirming to get away from him* out of its cage!

RON: And after we tripped over all this junk on the floor. Harry, why are we here anyway?

HARRY: *as if he’s said it a million times before* Fanfics.

RON: Oh. *rolls eyes*

*Harry puts the gerbil on my face*

ME: AAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *I see Harry and Ron in my room, stop screaming, and proceed to pluck the gerbil off of the Turkey Suit (that’s my name for my blanket… don’t ask)* What’re YOU doing here?

HARRY: *chuckles* What do you think?

ME: *cringe* Is it about my fanfics?

*Both boys nod solemnly*

RON: Don’t you remember? You said you wouldn’t write them anymore.

ME: *trying to pretend I don’t know what he’s talking about* Huh?

RON: How can you NOT remember? In Diagon Alley… when I –

ME: Oh yes, but don’t YOU remember that I said I was babbling mindlessly? *smirk* I guess you cut me off before I got to finish saying that.

*Ron blushes*

*Harry glares at Ron and elbows him in the ribs*

RON: Ow!

ME: *still holding the gerbil, which is writhing in my grasp* I’ve got to put Swirly back in his cage. *holding head with free hand* And I need to take a Tylenol.

*Ron has a blank look on his face*

ME: Muggle medicine. *Look nervously at the two* Stay quiet. I don’t want to wake my mom up.

RON: What about your dad?

ME: He could sleep through World War 3. *I leave the room, walk through the hallway and think to myself* The first time it was cute, but this time they’re downright annoying. I’m not going to stop writing! At least not until I’m done with End of the Line. *open Swirly’s cage and put him back into it, where he romps around happily* At this rate, that’ll be the last thing I’ll write. *I comb my fingers through my hair like I do when I’m stressed and/or have a headache, and in this case, both apply* Man, this is one killer headache. *I proceed to the bathroom, where I take some Tylenol, then stand in front of my door and take a deep breath before going back in, where I’m greeted by the sight of Harry and Ron getting into my secret candy stash. Little do they know that half of that stuff is left over from New Year’s Eve* HEY!

RON: *talking with a half-chewed Strawberry Cream Puff in his mouth* What? You take away our dignity in your fics, so we can take your candy!

ME: Point well taken. *sigh* At least you haven’t been reading - *I look on top of my TV to see that my notebook isn’t there and promptly panic*

HARRY: *holding my journal and skimming through it* So, what’s going on with you and this Lee guy? One day you like him, the next you don’t…

ME: THAT’S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!

RON: *kinda hurt* What about me?

ME: What about you? You’re not even real!

RON: *simmering in anger* Pffftt!

ME: It’s two o’clock in the morning! Do you expect me to be amiable? Now, OUT! OUT!

RON and HARRY: NO!

ME: MOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!