HI I'M STUMPY! Welcome to my webpage

(If you're wondering why the background is pink, it is because it's Stumpy's favorite Halo color)

"Not all Mexican's are minorities"

--Stumpy

COMING SOON: DOWNLOADS OF STUMPY LYING ON THE PHONE! TO GET A COPY EARLY, E-MAIL THE "SITE ADMINISTRATORS" WHOSE NAMES CAN NOT BE MENTIONED; ALSO COMING SOON!----STUMPY PHOTOS THROUGHOUT THE YEARS. PHOTOS OF STUMPY FROM 1998-2000, NOTICE HOW HE HAS CHANGED

-->Please Visit Visit the Stumpy Message Board!<--

-->Voice your opinion in the Stumpy Poll<--

-->Stumpy Photo Gallery<--

Welcome to Stumpy's page. Below Stumpy's famous quotes, you will find even more fun Stumpy info and facts. Thanks for visiting and enjoy! 

SPREAD THE STUMPY WORD! TELL YOUR FRIENDS TO VISIT THE S.I.D.

NOTE: We have removed Stumpy's e-mail address for security purposes. Stumpy is not interested in any sort of online dating, etc. Please respect his wishes and do not bother him.

If you're wondering who the hell Stumpy is, he's a cool cat we all know and love from Freehold Township, NJ, Wynnefield to be exact, good old Big Bill. Note that if you ever come across any sort of newsletter e-mail or directly to your mailbox, sign up Stumpy for it. He loves getting things in the mail.

Why do we call him Stumpy? That's a good question, who the hell knows!!

-->Please Visit Visit the Stumpy Message Board!<--

-->Voice your opinion in the Stumpy Poll<--

-->Stumpy Photo Gallery<--

Features

Stumpy Message Board

Stumpy Poll

Stumpy Photos

Stumpy's message to Atnan

These are Stumpy's "CLASSIC" quotes. Quotes from the summer of 2003 can be found by clicking here

• "Because that's who I am and that's who I care about"
  

• "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!? I NEVER SAID THAT!"
  

• "Good ol' Stumparoo"
  

• "WHOA!"
  

• "Ok I quit"
  

• "I'm gonna lose anyway"
  

• "Ok, I lied"
  

• "Oh yeah, ok, why don't everyone just team up and get Stumpy"
  

• "Oh no, we're losing" (while his team is winning 9-6)
  

• "YES! I got him!" (while he killed a member of his own team)
  

• "YO!!!!"
  

• "OH YEAH!!!"
  

• "Yeah, I lied"
  

• "What English class are you in?"
  --"Honors English 4"
  

• "Oh you are"
  --"no, I lied"

• "Yeah it's hilarious just laugh it up"

• "I can see you changed my color again."

• "My dad hits me with a belt, wanna see the scars?" (note: Stumpy's dad does not abuse him. He just used this quote once for who knows what reason.)

• "uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

• "Yeah, Stump Stumpity Stump"

• "Haha you like that!"

• "Stop calling me a polar bear"

-"we didn't we called you bi-polar"

Stumpy [7:29 PM]:  i cant come out til i pass the permit test  
**************** [7:29 PM]:  are you kidding me
Stumpy [7:29 PM]:  im grounded  
Stumpy [7:29 PM]:  no   
****************  [7:29 PM]:  hahahahaha......why does your mom ground you if you fail a driving test
****************  [7:29 PM]:  thats ridiculous
Stumpy [7:30 PM]:  she grounds me 4 everything  

CLASSIC STUMPY QUOTES

There are tons of great Stumpy quotes and new ones come out each week. Just give us some time and this list may require its own webpage.

Auto response from Stumpy [5:00 PM]: ever have ur asshole licked out by a fat man in an overcoat?

Auto response from Stumpy [5:00 PM]: 
Splintered piece of glass falls in the seat of gets caught 
These broken windows, open locks, reminders of the youth we lost 
In trying so hard to look away from you 
we followed white lines to the sunset 
I crash my car everyday the same way 

Time to let this pass 
(the time it takes, the time it takes to let go) 
Time runs through our veins. 
(it starts and stops and starts and stops again) 
We don't stand a chance in this threadbare time 
(to take time to break the cycle)

Auto response from Stumpy [5:02 PM]: Go, go, go, go
Go, go, go shawty
It's your birthday
We gon' party like it's yo birthday
We gon' sip Bacardi like it's your birthday
And you know we don't give a fuck
It's not your birthday!

You can find me in the club, bottle full of bub
Look mami I got the X if you into taking drugs 
I'm into having sex, I ain't into making love 
So come give me a hug if you into to getting rubbed

Auto response from Stumpy [7:55 PM]: Has he lost his mind?
Can he see or is he Blind?
Can he walk at all,
Or if he moves will he fall?
Is he alive or dead?
Has he thoughts within his head?
We'll just pass him there
why should we even care?

He was turned to steel
in the great magnetic field
Where he traveled time
for the future of mankind

Nobody wants him
he just stares at the world
Planning his vengeance
that he will soon unfold 

Now the time is here
for Iron Man to spread fear
Vengeance from the grave
Kills the people he once saved!!!

Auto response from Stumpy [2:01 PM]: busy doin something 

call if you need me 732-***-****      (hahaha, who the hell is gonna call Stumpy!)

<NEW> Auto response from Stumpy [2:01 PM]: I hate the way you talk to me. And the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car. I hate it when you stare I hate your big dumb combat boots. And the way you read my mind. I hate you so much it makes me sick-- it even makes me rhyme. I hate the way you're always right. I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh -- even worse when you make me cry. I hate it that you're not around. And the fact that you didnt call. But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you - - not even close, not even a little bit, not any at all.

STUMPY AWAY MESSAGES

These are just a few of our favorites, more to be added soon

Stumpy's Life, from Stumpy's AOL homepage:

hang out with friends KT, JS, MF, NP, KC, AC, BM, RM, SG, SG, PS, and chill around.

When asked to describe himself, Stumpy responded with this~

IM white, blond hair, blue eyes, I like CKY RULES !!!! slipknot, Ozzy, slayer, Machinehead, Korn, Mushroomhead, The Used, 36crazyfits, Taproot, Thursday, Iron Maiden, Rob Zombie, Quiet Riot, Disturbed, ACDC, The Outfield, and Linkin Park

You've gotta love those first two words!

Stumpy's Hobbies, from Stumpy's AOL homepage:

I like to go to the mall and concerts at the birch hill. I also go to the movies and hang with friends, and chillin' in keiths basement.

YO MEAGAN !!!! LOL

 **Stumpy also has a tendency to lie. He actually lies very often but he forgot to mention this on his AOL homepage so I thought I would include it myself**

Stumpy's Life: as per his AOL homepage & public opinion

"I'm baby-sitting I can't come out" --"What is the girl doing right now Bill" -- "She is sitting right next to me doing her homework"...1 HR later at Stumpy's place..."Bill where's the girl?" -- "Uhh, she's not here, I lied"

"Bill do you seriously think your x-girlfriend chrissy is hot?"---"yes, I do. I think she's hot"

1 week later---"Bill you said she was hot." "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, SHE'S UGLY I NEVER SAID THAT!"

"Bill, I'm here with this girl Nicole Parker do you know her?"..."Nicole Parker, uhhhhh yeah yeah i know her"    (Nicole Parker was made up she doesn't exist)

WHEN ASKED HOW HE MET HIS FORMER UGLY GIRLFRIEND CHRISSY, HE RESPONDED WITH...

"We were in English class and she said, 'anyone here get high?' and this kid said 'that kid gets high' and she said 'you get high?' and i said 'yeah i get high' and she said you wanna get high with me?' and i said yeah so she gave me  her number and so i called her.

WHEN ASKED ABOUT "RUSTPOTS" STUMPY SAID THIS...

"yeah so I was at my hockey game tonight and these kids were selling these things I've never heard of called rustpots or something, you ever hear of it Billy?"--"oh yeah yeah I've heard of that before"--"have you ever smoked it?"--"no no no but my friends do my friend Sean sells it, he's a senior, they its good shit"--"oh yeah, whats it look like?"--"uhhhh it looks kinda like this (makes odd movements with his hands that symbolize nothing)"

ALSO ASK ABOUT THE FAMOUS "CLOSET INCIDENT"

MORE LIES COMING SOON

Famous Stumpy Lies