Intimacy-Animosity
"I'm sorry, baby...I just couldn't do it."
Lance angrily pushed open the door of their new home. He stormed into the living room placing his keys on the counter. "I really don't want to talk about this right now."
"Lance, I--" JC trailed slowly into the living room behind Lance, stopping when he neared his irrate lover.
"Fuck, JC! I can't believe you! We had this planned for weeks! Your mother is here!"
"I got scared."
"Yeah, whatever." Anger, hurt, and frustration flashed across Lance's face. If JC truly loved Lance and believed in the love that the two of them felt for each other, then there was reason for his to be scared of his mother's reaction. They would have each other if anything happened and they already had Lance's parents for support.
"You still mad?"
"Of course."
"I love you." JC hoped Lance believed that he loved him. He really and truly did, but it was such a change from the love he had felt before with other lovers. This love was so much more potent. JC hoped this wouldn't cause too big of a strain on that love, he didn't think he could live without it.
"You don't even want to know how I feel right now." Hate might have been too strong of a word to apply to his current feelings, but love was not in the front of his mind when Lance thought about JC's actions that evening.
"Next time. I promise." JC promised himself that he would tell her, next time and that next time wouldn't result in yet another 'next time' like it had tonight. He just didn't believe that his mother would take the news nearly as well as Diane and Jim had. They had planned to use Karen's reaction to test the waters, JC was even more worried about Roy's reaction to his and Lance's 'relationship'.
"Heard that before."
"You know what I said back there didn't mean anything."
"Still hurts."
"People had to see how close we were sitting." They had always sat that close and Lance knew that he didn't have to point that out to JC. There had always been 'closeness' even before there had truly been 'relationship'.
"I'm going to bed."
"Can we cuddle?"
"You can sleep on the sofa."
"I still love you."
"I'm still angry at you." There was no true anger in his voice, only the light tones of defeat.
"You'll get over it."
"I know."
Lance unceremoniously stalked to the bedroom , shutting the door harshly. JC's body relaxed in defeat as he slumped to the hall closet to retrieve the extra pillow and comforter the couple used whenever one of the guys would stay the night.
He grimaced as he pulled it down from the upper shelf. He couldn?t remember when they had last done any laundry. Catching the scent of Downy dryerr sheets, he smiled, remembering how thoughtful the cleaning service was for always doing the small, forgotten things.
He opened the door to the bedroom cautiously. He was so glad he'd gotten this house. The two level bedroom suite was perfect in situations like this. He could be close to Lance, even if it meant sleeping on the sofa-bed on the lower level. He tread carefully around the 'sitting area' of the bedroom to the sofa-bed. He heard water running in the bathroom and sighed heavily. JC hated nights like this.
JC damned himself for being such a wimp with his mother, but he knew that he wanted to do this. Just not today. As he opened up the sofa bed, he made a silent vow that he would definitely tell her tomorrow. He owed Lance that much. Hopefully she would be able to see just how perfect Lance was for him. Hopefully.
He looked up towards the bathroom door and watched his lover from the shadows. Lance had apparently noticed him because he paused for a moment, as if considering something, then headed towards the four poster bed. JC rolled his eyes and adjusted himself on the sofa-bed.
"Goodnight!" He yelled, almost pleadingly.
" Night!"
"I love you!" It never hurt to throw that in.
"Love you, too!"
JC smiled, partially satisfied that things were OK. He was so going to make this up to Lance later.
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