September 12, 2000
Lance,I wanted to thank you love, for the beach house. It has been a wonderful place to heal. I am back in Orlando after three months there total. The boys stayed with me after they finished the tour. They aren’t going to continue as a group. They don’t want to do it without you and they couldn’t replace you.
Chris is going to marry Dani next week; the whole world seems to know about it. Josh and Justin are thinking about doing solo careers, you know, I think they will be fine. Joey, he was the biggest surprise. Josh told me that you all knew it was going to end eventually and that everybody thought Joey would, well that you had no idea what Joey would do. He is going to help Jim and I with FreeLance Entertainment.
That brings me to the other major news. I invested a lot of what you left me, so with money taken care of for a really long time, I quit at Laguna Programming. Jim, Joey, and I are going to work with FreeLance almost full time now, at least until the baby is born then I will take some time off.
I also got a new car this week, that was perhaps more painful than facing the apartment again. I went through most of your things in the apartment. I am keeping most of the things that I can wear like the shirts and boxer, I think I will let the boys have a go at what I don’t want.
I sleep in the middle of the bed now, it did take a lot of careful planing and thinking and remembering before I could get into our bed without you. Sometimes I think I can hear your voice call out to me.
Rene