Everything I am, is yours:
In loyalty I will lay down my life,
Surrender my soul,
Barter my immortality for yours.
You have my sword, my heart, my honour
You, who deserve nothing less.
Once it was so easy:
In loyalty I lay down my life,
Gave up all that I was to die by your side
And found a noble ending.
You had my sword, my heart, my honour:
Would that I could have given you more!
Now I know not what to give you:
Take my life, for without you it has no meaning
Take my love, for without you it grows numb
Take my heart, for without you it beats not.
With my pen I would do honour to you
As once my sword fought valiantly for you.
But words will not come:
I am so stirred by your presence
That I cannot speak when you are near
I cannot breathe when you are absent
My soul cries out for you
And I ache to have you near me once more.
The reality breaks through:
You are so far from me, yet seeming so close
You do not know me as once you did
Another lifetime has passed between us
And there is such a chasm to be forged
That no pen, no sword alone can bridge it.
I long to make you see:
To feel as I do the certainty of it all
The longing and the ache that burns the soul
The torment and the rapture that sweep through me
Each day without you is an agony of waiting
Waiting always, my lord, for you.
Time, random and splintered:
Opening up again slowly, letting me in
Letting the past come through
Creating this moment when all things seem possible
While I live in dreams, I incarnate a reality
That brings us back together.
I need to be with you:
Like twin sparks of a flame we burn apart
Unsustained, unknown, unborn
Together we could rule worlds
Together we could forge a destiny so great
That the gods themselves would weep.
Everything I am, is yours:
Then, now and always I have wanted this.
I surrender, and you exalt my life to divinity
With one flash of your eyes I am reborn;
One breath of love between us
And the centuries of waiting would all be worthwhile.
This evanescent moment, this glimpse
This sparkling dream, this longing hope
Lost in aspiration and desire
Found in honour and loyalty
An honour that lives only to serve you;
A loyalty that binds me eternally to you.
Richard, you are the life I have never known
The happiness I have craved for centuries
In your eyes alone is the gift of light
And you burn in my soul
Engraving your memory in my heart
With the arcane power of the phoenix.
Rise, rise again, rise up and come!
Undying spirit in the body of this beautiful man
I worship thee in all humility
Yet proudly take my place at your side
Knowing full well I deserve it:
I have waited more than long enough.
[31st January 2009]
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