The News Story of the century!!?

Splag,Nz.--It is a cloudy, warm day-here in New Zealand. The air is clear and clean. The feeling is like that after a quite summer rain. All is calm and relaxed.It does not hint to the disasterous event; that occurred less than twenty-four hours ago. This small warehousing district, in southern New Zealand, a quaint village of family and friends has now become the center of the world.

According to the local papers, a young warehouse workman had accidently backed his forklift into some old lead-covered crates. The collision caused the lead to break open and it's contents to be spilled onto the warehouse floor. Not an unusual circumstance for a warehouse; however, this time it has put the whole planet on alert and possibly cause the end of civization as we know it. Amongst various objects, he noticed what looked like human remains. Alarming, only because it had the smell of the recent dead. This could not be possible in crate that had not been opened in over 50 years!!

There was also a green ooze smeared over all the objects and within the crate. Naturally, the young man called his foreman, who notified the local constabulary. The coroner called in the forensics lab, and they called in a special team of scientists and experts; when it was found that the crate had held radioactive contents of the worst kind. And at the highest levels. There are several people, who came in close contact with the materials and even now suffering greatly from radiation sickness and burns. There has only been one death so far...

A local informant has revealed that these crates had been in storage since the establishment of the village; in World War 2. The village was established shortly after WW2, by a few russian and german immigrants seeking refuge from tyranny. According to local records an entire warehouse was consigned for a Wilhelm LonStat Von Kleist a few years after the establishment of the new warehousing districts. Our informant tells us that not only was there 4 lead sealed crates shipped and stored, but over 1,500 lead crates were brought by a russian freighter. These crates were then placed and stored/sealed in this large warehouse. Von Kleist never appeared to sign papers or to oversee the transfer. A yearly check was drawn and signed at a local bank. This bank having a trust fund set up for the payment of storage. This trust fund was one of the main money funds that helped this warehouse district to grow and prosper until now. The warehouse was renovated 20 years later and the lead crates were supposed to be stored in an underground storage vault for security; at the time it was believed that the crates held historical and valuable material. They knew that no insurance could cover that cost. It was only a clerical error that 4 crates marked in german 1, 2, 3,& 4 were moved and placed in the active areas of the warehouses.

A colleague of mine reports that there was a Von Kleist living in a Germany before the war. Von Kleist was an aristocrat and very well off; he also was known to invest in amusing little projects that usually dealt in the sciences or the occult. Von Kleist never married and lived alone after he moved to Russia. An old news article tells of Von Kleist disappearing after having an argument with a long time girlfriend. It was assumed that he had returned to Germany after the war.

It was about 2 pm yesterday when the warehouse district was closed and HASMAT personnel was stationed at various points around the area. At 4 pm, It was annonced that the possible source of the radation was from uranium. Within minutes the puzzle fell together and the panic arose; people are even now boarding planes and boats to leave this beautful island. For it has been speculated that the ony source it could be is U-235; the fuel for the big bomb. At 6 pm a special broadcast link through CNN told the story of the lost Von Kleist, the evil mystery man or men who used him, and the hofforrific device that is now ticking down to it's own destruction.

92 hours and counting-- The human remains was finally identified as Von Kleist; by a record of a lost thumb in a gambling party he had held. As, to the green ooze and freshness of his death there is one speculation at this time; except that if he were alive he would be 187 years old. It is believed that the circumstantial materials encased with him and the radiation caused a reaction that resulted in the green ooze and later preservation of his body. He had been encased and sealed within the crate while he was still alive. It is believed he was caught trying to escape to the Allied forces.

What is the reason for this mass exodus from just a small radiation accident? read on.

At 8 pm the CNN news link opened again with the blinding news flash of the century. The opening of the no.1 crate; which held Von Kleists remains, and subsequenced opening of the other crates by scientists has set a device into motion. The bad news was imparted to the scientists by a local german translator. The personal journal that Von Kleist had in his coat pocket had been painstakingly cleaned and translated. The strange objects were as a whole or in separate parts the mechanisms for the " DoomsDay Device " which apparently was to have been set off by the Germany Military leaders upon Hitlers death. The scientists scoffed at this and soon found that they could not determine how it works or even how to stop it.

When asked, Proffessor Brach N. Brane had this to say

"The journal found in the pocket presumably recorded and documented the construction of a device that effectively turned the world into it's own "bomb". the journal describes the construction of 2 shafts, one near the vicinity of the warehouse reaching to the center of the earth and the other on the other side of the world.

The 1500 barrels contained the uranium 238. 750 on a rocket sled near the vicinity and the other half at the opening of the other tunnel on the other side of the world. These 2 massive amounts of radioactive meterial were poised to race towards one another at high velocity and meet in the center of the earth, turning the 1500 barrels into pure unadulterated "earth-shattering" energy.The initial nuclear fission of the uranium into lighter elements would cause the 300,000,000 degrees needed to start the cobalt fusion of the earth's core making a bomb of the whole earth powerful enough to destroy the moon."

Day Three--- The scientists have tried ultrasonic bombardment, X-rays, employed mathematicians, astrologers, and even hammers to open the strange objects and to no avail. Researchers from all over the globe are digging into old tomes and records for any information that may help. The end is near folks; do what you must and prepare. This reporter has an appointment with his family.... This is Paul Umleaggs reporting for The Daily Star News..God Bless....and Goodbye...