Now, you may ass-ume that we meant
the proturberance of flesh in small circular or irregular shapes. Herein, we observe and simplify the award winning personality of ourselves....ass-imilated by the great and wise (Dr.)Bonzie Chimp.Esq.... WE have developed a new
name for this and it is Anal Wart(i.e. meaning a backsided selfish person with many flaws that ingratiates us to no end,therefore translated to asshole.)
Assholes often report having had "personality conflicts" with others, especially their superiors at work. After years of hearing about this, one concludes that the personality conflict is simply that theirs happens to suck.
Assholes lack self-insight, a key trait for personal development. You can lecture them all you want and they'll never change. They never saw those rolled eyes and hand gestures indicating the displeasure of others at their antics. Yet they are masters at projecting their own interpersonal definciencies onto others. Hence the "personality conflicts."
I once handled a case for a client who was a clinical asshole. You could call up her permanent record and see a litany of evidence of her assholery. She'd been bounced from several schools. When she landed a job at a ritzy hotel they kept having to move her around the departments because she couldn't get along with others. She'd had a series of failed relationships. She'd been reprimanded for getting drunk at a company Christmas party and dancing on tables and bearing her ample boobs. Her employer suspected her of running a side racket with the rich Arabs who frequented the hotel, bringing new meaning to the word hospitality.
Handling her case was a nightmare. She was constantly adding new medical complaints and dreaming up excuses why she couldn't work. But I'm used to that. What I wasn't prepared for were her hour long complaint messages left overnight on my boss's voice mail. If you ever have a claim, a word to the wise: never do that.
Naturally the situation deterioriated into one of those chicken and egg scenarios: Were we taking every opportunity to undermine her claim for being such an asshole? Or was she being such an asshole in response? See the permanent record above.
Finally she confided to me that she felt convinced that we were singling her out for mistreatment solely because of her asshole status. Of course I told her that wasn't true, this is just standard operating procedure for claims. But she wasn't buying it and went on to repeat her scurrilous allegations to the Big Boss. Bad idea.
I guess it comes down to who is entitled to protection in our hypersensitive, politically correct environment. Do assholes join ditzy blondes, hillbillies and lawyers as the only groups upon whom it is still okay to heap scorn and ridicule
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