April 20 2002 The Guardian New Delhi: A videotape smuggled across the Himalayas by two Tibetan monks has revealed how Chinese officials demolished one of Tibet's most important centres of Buddhist learning last year, reducing most of the building to rubble. The footage, screened for the first time on Thursday, shows the systematic destruction of the Serthar Buddhist Institute in Tibet. It makes a mockery of Beijing's frequent claim that Tibetans enjoy religious freedom, Tibetan human rights campaigners said. The institute was home to almost 9000 students of Buddhism, many of whom were ethnically Chinese. But Chinese authorities became suspicious of it after its charismatic founder, Khenpo Jigme Phuntsok, met the Dalai Lama, Tibet's exiled spiritual leader. Last July, more than 1000 security officials turned up at the hillside institute in 50 trucks and jeeps. They ordered local workmen to demolish the students' living quarters. An elite army commando unit camped in a valley nearby to prevent resistance. The video shows grim-faced Tibetan nuns trying to retrieve a few possessions from the remains of their homes. Others, dressed in maroon and orange robes, lie sobbing on the ground. In the distance, Chinese soldiers can be seen goose-stepping across a parade ground. "We wanted to make sure the world sees the atrocities which are going on inside Tibet," said Kembo Tenkyong, one of the two monks who smuggled out the video. The Tibetan Centre for Human Rights and Democracy says it is deeply concerned about the fate of Jigme Phuntsok, the institute's abbot. After the demolition, Chinese officials took him to a hospital. He is now believed to be under house arrest in Chengdu, Sichuan province. Internal Chinese documents, it is claimed, show that the authorities decided to close the institute after concluding that many of its students were "anti-Chinese" and members of the "Dalai Lama clique". Officially, China has justified its action on the grounds that the centre was overcrowded and unhygienic.

In the present (UN) Convention, genocide means any of the following acts committed with intent to destroy, in whole or in part, a national, ethnical, racial or religious group, as such:

(a) Killing members of the group;

(c) Deliberately inflicting on the group conditions of life calculated to bring about its physical destruction in whole or in part;

(e) Forcibly transferring children of the group to another group.

Here are some of my meditative writings based off of Shantideva's style of verse. The purpose of these is just for me to try to formulate whatever droplets of learning i may have aquired into one mass. If you're not interested in buddhism or philosophy, it'd be best to skip over this.

            


            Introductory de-conceptualization 

So much pain and struggle for sustenance
when there is so little sustenance needed!
we create for ourselves more work than possible with our ignorance
perhaps our struggle shall be directed to mindfulness

Upon the realization of the humility and embarrassment of living, 
all restraining walls begin to thin and thin, like a large bubble on the verge of popping

Once the walls have dissolved,
and we are no longer locking up
we are free to wander amongst the ever growing trees and ever flowing rivers of mind
without a single opposition or stress

For the very things that we believe to be necessary 
And the very things that we work to maintain
Are the very things that restrain us from mindfulness
We build and keep watch over our own prison

It is not that I have more important vision or perception
It is that I have a desire for others to obtain vision and perception
and in that sense, i will try to create a knowledge for others
of my own little vision and perception, as to set an example

Of all the countless pairs of eyes, what other pair do I have than my own?
And, what sets mine apart from the rest?
Who is to say what sets mine apart, as a being above humanity?
it is nonexistent, therefore, without the vision to declare it,
distinction may as well not be.

All voices and opinions are like a golden field of wheat swaying in the winds,
full of stems of different lengths and thicknesses, 
giving different yields,
but all in the same, they are all stems of wheat
and thus, 
no matter what judgment applied, will always remain only stems of wheat

To declare yourself the receiver of all good will attain you no good,
for this simple reason-

What could we possibly have without the compassion of another?
if you were to count your knowledge and possessions,
your learned wisdom and comfort,
much of it would not exist without even the smallest help from another

and what could we possibly learn without others to provide the circumstances?
what trials could we overcome without the trials themselves arising?
though all problems arise from ignorance and selfishness,
it is that very foolishness of our lives that spawns our wisdom

our selfish acts provide negativity for ourselves,
but give others opportunities to learn,
and likewise, if the other is fortunate to be knowledgeable,
may they provide us with learning as well,
as we are desperately destitute of it

although another can powerfully attack me with his ignorance,
i do not flinch. because i have offered my body to all to interact, as a gift.
it is their wish what to make of it, and therefore i place any damage to myself 
as the loss of the attacker

for my body is nothing other than my physical reality
and it is a reality that can and will be disposed of
only to renew itself unceasingly
in as many forms that exist

therefore, I may as well use my body fearlessly
to help educate those that know no solution other than violence
by allowing myself to endure beatings and torture
to prove to them that under their only resource, they are failing

For why attach to this body for my own purposes? 
Does one get attached to a lit fuse?
One day this body will be no more, a rotting carcass
what happiness can i derive from a temporary vehicle?

upon a close look, even a bubble can be beautiful
one can be lost in the swirling sea of green and red
yet it is not to be focused upon or loved
it will burst, and if i am too near, leave me with soap in my eyes

however, I do wish to make use of this particular form,
as the chance to attain enlightenment is fleeting from my grasp,
as my life is a bucket of sand over a bottomless pit, 
with each grain leaking out a moment lost,
never to be recovered 

it is a reality that I and all beings are single droplets
in a rapid river of samsara, forever plunging down falls and crashing
due to the currents that we all have actually generated ourselves in the past
what other goal could I have but to resist the current?

what other is there to make of myself? and what other could provide such a boundless flow of happiness?

what other path could provide the ability to become the teacher and student of myself
for my own feeble vision is lost without direction
however, my own vision is not capable of seeing much importance;
it is then that I teach myself that vision is not what I need for sight

I have pledged to undertake the suffering of all beings as my own,
for how could i hope to banish suffering
without suffering myself as well?
for if suffering does not exist within my sight, how can it exist elsewhere?
for if I do not know what suffering I hope to end, where will I begin?

there are two boundless oceans of the mind,
that of compassion, and that of samsara

the ocean of compassion is an overflowing sea of goodness,
rich with the purest waters and clearest depths,
a liquid crystal plain
for the purpose of cleansing all of my ignorance

the ocean of samsara is a boundless, depthless body
filled with suffering and pain that has no end
black and thick oil slams across in waves, tearing the entire sea with torrents and pulls
for all of the perpetuated ignorance and selfishness
has filled it in this way, as the oceans of compassion 
were filled with the Buddha intent of all

it is possible to categorize all acts into two categories based from these,
those acts of selfishness, and those of compassion
what choice is there in such a matter, when deciding what decision to make?

for each choice yields opposite effects,
one with positive results for all,
the first with negativity for all

what good can anger do, beside deepening the sorrow of myself and all in contact?
for the more time I spend wallowing in impatience and foolishness, 
the more time I have wasted

and the more business I have advocated
of adding to the heads of others things that don't exist

however, by making a compassionate alternative your path,
there is the chance of knowledge falling upon both the ignorant and compassionate,
and nothing but positives can be a result

others may laugh at this truth;
and how funny it is,
that those destitute of knowledge are humorously intrigued by mindfulness
and how those that are mindful do not care of the laughter


            Detachment

Just as when I brush across a velvet cloth,
My perception is a delusion;

The cloth does not set forth any effort 
To create the sensation that I detect,
Nor does it have any capacity to do so
And nor does the cloth set forth any type of sensation for me to behold

So where is it that this sensation has it’s root?
Though my body may tell me of it,
What has my body, also, done to cause this sensation?
It is simply detecting, as is my mind

It is based on this that I throw away the belief that 
‘this cloth is soft to touch’
as the cloth is not associated with softness nor touch in any way
it is merely a cloth, that sets forth no sensation, nor anything else for me to know

the sensation is a delusion of my own mind,
my own mirage that I myself created,
not the cloth
why is it that I should believe, then, that the cloth has anything to do with it?

Likewise, although another can make remarks or display attributes of his mind,
Has his mind given off anything for me to detect about it?
Or has his action done the same?
Like associating sensation to material, I cannot connect my perceptions to his mind

For whatever I have gathered about another has all been created by my delusion,
Not gathered from another source
What other source could have put out this belief for me to accept?
And if a source has generated this belief, what other source could it be than the other’s mind or actions?

I have already thrown out the belief that his mind or actions are putting out a perception for me
Therefore, whatever statements or judgments, attitudes, likes, or dislikes that I have associated to another
Are all my own mirages, having nothing to do with the other at all
That is why whatever I belief I have about another has no connection to the other at all, and is entirely invalid and useless

And when I brush against a thorn, where is the source of the pain I have received?
Did the thorn create this pain, hold it, and plan to pass it onto me?
The thorn is simply there, not providing nor creating any painful sensations for others to endure

So, why should I be angry when I am caught on the thorn and cause myself to bleed?
After all, it is myself, not the thorn, that is generating this pain
My own body and mind have teamed together against me to create this pain

This pain is only inside my body, never leaving my body or entering it
Since it is only within myself, I can stop it
I can ignore my own delusions
if only I can see that they are delusions

In the same way, others can frustrate and depress me
But is it really their actions, or my mind
that is causing me to suffer?
It is all a dream, spurning delusion upon delusion to me, placing blame on outside dream elements
when it is all isolated to myself, not from outside, but occurring within my own head

You must realize that you, yourself, are your greatest threat
your body causing you the delusions of pain and pleasure
your mind creating the delusions of desire and selfishness
both delusions creating the illusion of reality

Take it as a valuable source of learning,
the mouth of a great river churning a powerful flow of water

I myself can cause me more harm than anyone else possibly could;
it is my mind that tricks me and persuades me
into doing what I hate most
it is my mind that provides the means for confusion 
and clouds myself from awareness

It is my mind that fabricates lies upon lies,
empty traps and cages
all for the sake of keeping me under control
and easy to maintain

Yet is my mind truly an enemy, or my friend?
after all, after an extent of cleansing
the blurs and distortions of mind can be wiped away
never existing as a part of my mind, but put there by unavoidable occurances

Do I have the greatest potential for causing my pain? yes.
but am I the greatest nemesis of myself? No.

I have good points and bad points,
an equal amount of each
so why spend my time worrying about either?
it will not resolve its cause

It will rob me of my most valuable wealth,
stealing my time and existence
and squandering it, leaving me hopeless
a beaten gambler bawling on the floor

Why is there not enough time to waste?
or, you may wonder, don't I have time enough for myself?

All that it takes for destruction is passed time
and over time, look and see
what has not decayed?
even the rocks and mountains crumble in years
over years every breath of air will be left poisoned
poison itself runs its course and ends
what makes you think that you will not die as well?


             Perception

what have you ever seen 
that your mind has not pieced together
and what have you ever felt
that your mind has not created

what have you ever thought or judged
that was not in your mind?
after all, if it is not in your mind,
how is it possible that you are envisioning it?

your mind is not a center for thought,
but a center for data processing

the senses are nothing more than the data
the mind is nothing more than a code breaker

it presents you with the results of its endeavor
a variety of colors and sights
a kaleidoscope of feelings and sensations
all of them having been assembled

none of them have ever existed
to your knowledge
what you perceive to be reality
i perceive to be no different than a dream
for they could not have been put to your attention and made
without imagination and construction, by only your mind and your mind alone

what you are reading now is a simple text
your eyes crossing about it
your mind pondering it
but what makes you so sure that you are reading truly?

how can you trust your eyes? how can you trust your vision?
how can you trust your sense of touch, to know what feels like what?
for these visions and these feelings are all so much like my pain
never entering my body, never leaving it
but instead fabricated here

you have not lived a life, but only a single instant,
this instant at this exact moment
you are given the illusion of past memories,
visions that your mind created just as anything else
yet there is only this instant,
which transforms and manifests into the next instant

you believe this to be your reality
one based off of 5 streams of code alone
what does such a delusion warrant? 
so much lavishing and frantic grasping, all for a dream
when a dream is corrupted by attachment, 
it is no longer imaginative and cerebral

I hear music
I see horizons and clouds
I taste fruit
I smell grass and flowers
I feel wind and rain
Yet I do not detect truth with these things,
Nor can I find a truth holding reality

a reality is present but indefinite
a brain is a puppet
a sense is a pinprick in a dream
a truth is an unreachable plane

do not attach to these senses,
do not attach to what they tell you
this pain you feel, what of it?
is it so different than a pleasant sensation?

you may dislike it, you may like it
it is another character in wonderland
devoid of definition and classification
but evidently present

these senses, you believe they collect this data
but from where? 
is this stream detected, or channeled?
you have enough time to wonder
where this stream of data has its source

I can glimpse, but not collect truth with my eyes
they do not provide sight


            Existence and time

When the light of attention is cast upon itself,
thought is certain to arise and swell
for when prompted to provide and explanation of itself,
the mind has no choice but to become active
and figure itself out

this awareness, this ability of thought
the gift of attention, this act of scrutiny
how is it possible?

as all beings possess the ability to think,
all beings are channels for the same forces
we are all linked together in the same way
by time and consciousness

time itself is difficult to comprehend;
this current thought, this concentration
depends on time very much to take place
when we look into this, the mind will be forced to activate
and generate an explanation of itself in a new way
this takes much thought and reflection to accomplish

this moment, as you are reading
your mind is pondering, computing, consciously active
your current thought is very much intertwined
with this current instant
that is the simplified, abridged version
of time and existence itself

this very moment is a form of energy itself,
never ending, never beginning
birth less and without death
for if this current instant had a beginning, or if it did end
it would soon fall into the past, being over with, or belong in the future, not yet within grasp

if this current instant were existent in the past or future
we would not have the gift of thought; 
thought would be existent in the past or future, never the present
consciousness would be impossible if it were not applicable in this instant
thought is not existent in the past or future.

if this very instant belonged to the past,
how would time progress, or flow?
for if this very instant could be marked with a beginning, it would surely also have an end
and would become or already be past tense
if that were true, how would the past ever evolve forward into future, without motivation or energy to do so?

if this very instant belonged to the future,
how would the present be existent? 
for if our thoughts were existent in the future,
how could awareness exist presently, and how would time progress to create that future?

this very instant is the driving force
that creates future and present
it draws time along with it, creating a trail
through all dimensions, through all previously nonexistent items

but it can never remain in the past,
nor can it exist in future;
it only blazes throughout time, 
leaving embers as the past
burning the current instant into the future of the past

this very instant is indeed an energy or force
a property of time, perhaps even time itself
it does not leave anything to fall into the past
it does not jump forward to the future

it only flows and manifests 

thought must be present to exist,
for awareness and attention are current actions
not possible without current instants
there is a bond between the two forces

consciousness is very much existent within this current instant
but never in the past, nor future
for consciousness, much like the current time, cannot exist in the past or future
for the very same reasons; it is a present action
and, for the very same reasons, cannot die or have birth

consciousness and time must merge 
to provide the grounds on which thought is possible
this merge takes place not physically,
not within our perception;
it happens within dimensions,
the fabrics of physics and the universe

the purpose of sentient beings
is to withhold these energy forms
the current instant cannot exist, after all,
without time possessing a method to channel itself
and consciousness cannot exist
without the current instant being able to flow and manifest 

life is the carrier of time and existence
life is the channel for the waters of the universe
life is consciousness and time itself


            War of unconsciousness

In our everyday life
we face bombardment
propaganda rains upon us without end
mindlessness is a medium for our living

we live in societies
that do not have any mental existence left
so wrapped in impulses rather than thought
so aimless due to subconscious aiming

what we pursue and lust for with our time
is convenience and satisfaction
these things cannot provide what we truly need in life
they do not have the possibility of providing happiness

beyond all desire, there is the same goal
to possess happiness,
a state of peace and emotional wealth

even desires for self destruction or misery
are with this goal of obtaining happiness
if one desires satisfaction from their own decay,
what is that satisfaction, when followed to its final root, but a frantic grasp for happiness?

all of our actions will have different outcomes, different motives
that is why our actions themselves are irrelevant to what we wish for;
each person pursues different things in different ways, 
but each person pursues the same ultimate item with these actions

if only we had the clarity of knowing what our actions were attempting to gain for us
if only we could commit actions of our own conduction, rather than following what our mind tells us
if only we did not follow impulses, but instead, directed ourselves towards happiness
the actions that we all took would be so much simpler to control

in our lives, many of us have no regard for anything
some will crush thousands, slaughtering entire civilizations
all for the sake of completing their desires
surely, if we knew the route towards our own happiness, being the happiness of a single being, these actions would not be necessary!

unfortunately, our own mindlessness blocks us from knowledge
we do not all have capacity to trace our actions, and to find out what they were pursuing
even more unfortunate are the masses of humans
whom are unable to even have a single true thought
so brought to the border of unconsciousness by their own lifestyles and loved ones
that they do not believe the purpose of their actions, nor life itself, has any relevance!

the more aware we become, the more we will be able to withhold in our minds
capacity can be increased, at the same rate as mental autonomy
if we can learn to follow our impulses less and less,
until we break free of them entirely
and self actualize ourselves in order to become truly independent beings,
then what possibilities we have!

society is a force acting against this,
heavy handedly attempting to drive the possibility of mindfulness out of existence
those who are wise may develop a disgust with the world of popularity and impulse that we have created
and abandon it, soon after on their way to attain enlightenment

following what is believed to be correct will always lead you to a fate
that is terrible and tormenting, but believed to be the goal
formulating what you believe to be correct, on the other hand
will lead you to your own goal, whatever it may be

how can you possibly reach happiness,
through the combined methods of hundreds of millions of people?
for if each person differs so much, 
how could one path provide for all of them?

there is no other being in existence
that can give to you the path of emancipation
nor is there any scripture, from any mythical religion nor any present figure,
that can expound the way to happiness for you

this is because the path to your happiness
does not exist yet
it must be blazed, created, manifested, by yourself
after all, the path must serve you, and how could a path made by another 
show you the way to your own happiness, which is unknown to even yourself?

the hope for humanity to accomplish happiness is fading as time goes by
societies grow larger, more intricate, more reaching
more controlling and more capable of creating idiots than ever before
it is this time, right now, that it is most important to attain self actualization
this time now is more relying on the cultivation of mindfulness than any time in history

this travel to happiness is so difficult, so time consuming, 
so depending on thought and understanding
yet how many believe 
that it can be achieved through television! 

the land of the material and trivial lives
cannot provide a single mind with satisfaction;
how sad and terrible it is,
how dark and gloomy are the lives that so many have been pressed to live

one who attains enlightenment, actualization, or even casual wisdom
will be left alone
having climbed over a mountain to find no one awaiting on the other side
but there is no turning back after this; there can be no regression

there is only one thing for those lucky few, who reach happiness and surpass all desire,
to attempt accomplishing;
the destruction of ignorance, 
the freeing of the caged minds,
the awakening of the unconscious

in the past, all positive figures who we have followed,
all influences that lead us to happiness and wisdom
have all been those enlightened ones that attained their own happiness
without the blind motivations of society and the ignorant notions of the insecure

without their actions, without their terrible labor, 
how would we have the chance for our own happiness and wisdom?
in order to continue the flow of knowledge and the maintenance of happiness
it is necessary to devote yourself to doing so

it may seem bleak and strenuous to you, to devote your life selflessly
but if you have already attained happiness and actualization, it is not so hard!
strong happiness may never fade once grasped, no matter what obstacles or torments endured
to all that have steeped themselves in this devotion for our sake, let their actions carry into the future

there may be no mainstream path to happiness
there may be no existent minds in stereotypical society
there may be no way to provide others with the means for their own happiness
but, there is a way to direct people to happiness
by echoing the helpful wisdom of others that stirred our own awareness
by destroying the ignorant ramblings that stole happiness from people in the first place

with our actions, we have generated so much pain, so much suffering, so much evil, so many slaughters
we have even summoned our own extinction and the death of our entire earth
but in our intentions, all that we have ever desired is happiness; 
consider what has been said, and you may find the reason for this


            Framework

Some become led so astray
that they have no mind left whatsoever
dragged through a rough and bumpy path
by an unstopping vehicle
they have been harmed too long to feel anything

a mind devoid of sustenance and emotion
is a mind that cannot survive;
but a mind will frantically do anything possible  to remain present
and so framework begins as a system to bypass the blockage of ignorance

insecurities become cemented with material
for in your emotions, you are weak
but in your surroundings, you appear strong!
faith is put into the delusion that a chair can make you complete
the material is loved and used as a base for emotion,
when there is no other base to be used

and for the blame of all your problems,
anything can become the wrongdoer!
the imperfections of one race undergo a metamorphosis 
into the cause of your anger
a channel is built, a river of impatient rage can now flow
and empty into the abyss of society

your social standing may become an issue,
if it has potential to feed you the security that you lack so deeply inside
one may crusade and slaughter to reach the top
when they are so mentally at the bottom, and may grasp so fearfully
just to receive a taste of imaginary stableness,
having pressed so many others to misfortune just to observe a brief dream of satisfaction

and religion in times of mental framework is disastrous
a tool to be used by the security mongering mind
an aid to mentality, but sometimes a further harm to personality
this religious belief may blossom into a deep attachment for the sake of sanity
and cause death, hate and turmoil, all because we do not know what we are doing

desire to stand out amongst surroundings may be a desire to be an idol,
a wish for attention and admiration 
from legions of those who do not have a true reason to give this attention and admiration
a wish for love from those who do not know you; a thirst for gold for a work that was never labored
if we could only have enough importance to be worshipped,
we believe that we would be completed

destructive behavior will lead to massacre and tragedy
if it catches the mind’s eye for completeness
explosions and death will supercede reason and thought,
when reason and thought have been pressed to the point of nonexistence
perhaps if we were happy ourselves,
we would not want to send a ripple through society, and dislodge others to make them adrift as we are

when this mind, so precious, so powerful, and so vulnerable
loses itself in the deserts of unconsciousness
it must find a way to survive in this new environment, by whatever methods possible
people become like donkeys led by carrots,
pursuing what they need in order to live
and doing whatever necessary to remain people


           Fools

Perhaps our most mindless moments
and our most laughably childish thoughts
exist not in the midst of the mind’s impulses,
but during the times that we pursue bodily impulses

what a waste of time
what a waste of life
what a pointless and merit less pursuit;
yet it is what we build lives upon!

some spend nearly half their life working, 
over half their life sleeping
and the few precious moments of time they gain in between
are spent on the lust for flesh that will soon be decaying
as their own bodies, too, will;
why engulf yourself on the impermanent?

for these bodies are only vehicles
we must use them to make permanent change
if you spend your life focusing on an impermanent object, 
what permanent good can you possible achieve for anyone or anything?
or, for yourself?

this life has been gained from the consequences
of many past lives; perhaps millions, perhaps infinite lives
this life, if wasted, will not return again
perhaps not for another million lifetimes; perhaps never again.

this life, it is a shining sun
found in an infinite ocean of blackness;
how rare and cherished it must be!
how much work it has taken to achieve this bodily vehicle

and yet look at yourself; 
how much time have you spent
pursuing satisfaction for this vehicle, 
and not what houses this vehicle?

as many have expounded before,
this flesh, so precious to so many
is nothing but a slowly rotting corpse
the only thing keeping it from decay are regenerating cells;
a butcher seasoning meat to prevent it from spoil
yet you feel that it is so sacred and pure; 
how little is keeping flies from buzzing around it,
and animals from tearing scraps from it!

this skin is not a beautiful thing;
it is a veil over pulsating veins and gas filled organs
a sac for the workings of this vehicle

this face is nothing more than sensory organs;
beautifully arranged, it may seem, 
but only a mass of detectors, it’s insides full with digestive acids 

whatever it may be, this face is like a work of art, you believe?
then why not treat it like one?
why does one not lick and caress paintings and sculptures
if they are also beautiful works of art?

this body, full of shapes and curves
hypnotizing to many
is filled with foul excrement

how unsanitary and avoided defecate is
yet how admired and lusted for the housing of it is
respect the figure of others, if you wish
but know what is packed just under the surface; how attractive is this thought?

your lust still exists, these thoughts possibly denied?
it will be to your disadvantage exponentially more than your advantage
those who abuse and enslave us with our own minds
are given such a powerful and controlling tool 

while being bombarded with lies and mind numbing misinformation
you are always effected more than you can detect
advertisement for a product used to shave your face
is aimed to sexually stimulate you

an automobile is a terrible invention
polluting the earth, poisoning the very air we breathe, crippling plants and blackening habitats 
causing our own extinction, even ruining our patience and sharpness with simple concepts;
it is glamorized with the images of sex and phallic drives, aimed to be cleansed in male eyes

how often it works

many are put into shackles in this way, 
forced to accept the belief 
that everything can be and is a sex object
how obediently they obey what is told to them

even those with the highest consciousness, the most beautiful thoughts
have their heads turned without effort
at the sight of this body
the most valuable thoughts, lost;
arisen during a period of inconsolability, they are turned away, ignored
and fade back into the abyss, perhaps never to return again

if that is what happens to the mindful, 
imagine what the mindless undergo
how needless it is to say
how very controlled and hopeless they are

if you ever hope to lose impulses, 
you must hope to lose this drive
some call it love, 
when they feel an inexplicable desire for flesh
how can that be mistaken as something other than an impulse?

if you wish to love, love the mind and energy
the flesh is nothing more than a sputtering robotic vessel
assembled from junk parts, sometimes it does not even function
I plead that you do not waste your time leering at it

for the time of negative consequences comes not while these desires are being fulfilled,
but after you have died
having your chance at living through high frequency energies gone,
your sun collapsed into blackness

and your consciousness forever attaching through lower frequencies
and more miserable forms
if you do not achieve higher frequencies and experience them,
how can you hope for your mind to know them, and travel towards them?

do not sink into samsara
for the sake of enjoying a soon to be carcass
and do not allow yourself to be sold into slavery
for the sake of chasing a worthless sensation



           Compassion


The ever important roles of interaction and expression
May be seen as the substances of existence itself
Through the course of our lives, what do we not do but change our surroundings
And when we travel, what do we do but change positions and contexts? 

Since all existence is changing, and interaction is a philosophy
It is very important to control interactions 
If you wish to control your own life
As the consequences of exchanges create all futures

Compassion is the most valuable entity in life
Bringing positive results to all beings involved
As often as possible
And never causing more harm than necessary

There is never a valid excuse to turn away from kindness
Nor is there any situation where understanding cannot help
And there is not a person, time, nor predicament
To which compassion is not of the best use

Beings who endure suffering for others
For far too long without rest
May allow hardships to overcome their minds
And they may continue on working for the benefit of all beings, while bitter and overwhelmed with disgust for them

It is important to recover compassion when stress buries it
For you may believe your life to be blighted, 
And you may see others to live a life without a thought, 
Thereby a life without a single hardship to come into mind

But do not be blind to the waste and pain that they are enduring
And will endure as a result of their unconsciousness
There is always some conscious thought even in the thoughtless,
And although it may be enslaved and disoriented, suffering is still familiar to them

You believe your life to be the one which is blighted, 
But if you have worked your entire existence
To lessen all negativity and suffering for others 
Then in return have possibly lessened your own suffering infinitely
Through the compassion and awareness gained

But in the lives of many others,
There is no awareness or control, nor is there any progress to be made
How miserably and disappointingly they will fall and sink
After building so long towards the chance of having happiness

They are the ones who lead an existence of torment
And although their bodies and brains may act indifferently
Their bodies and brains are items unrelated to the energy of thoughts
And will remain so until they no longer exist

In times when you pity yourself and feel others are lazy,
How ironic it could be
If you were the one complaining with a lightened burden
And they were the ones silently falling with the weight of consequences

If you believe that others should disregard their suffering,
Then you should disregard your own an infinite amount more
As the contrast between their troubles and yours
Is indeed an infinite gap

If others are wished to be more compassionate,
With their locked and disadvantaged lives,
Then you should control your own meager disadvantages infinitely more,
As this is an equal effort

In the sense that your tension and troubles are robbing you from abundant kindness,
This described disregard is of that tension
If you wish to interact in the most compassionate way possible
Your own troubles must not stop you from doing so

If it is at all possible to control suffering,
Then surely those with any awareness are the ones capable
So do not become bitter with the misery of life
It can only serve to add more misery for all

And if it is misery that you object to
Then there is no path to take other than that of the utmost compassion.


           Color

there is no such concept as location
in a universe of infinite existence
as without having a single boundary, 
how can one draw a line or point
recognizable in terms of relationship 
to an anchored frame when there is no frame present?

it is as if to say that a drop of water
in an infinitely large ocean
holds a differentiation from the others, 
and can be labeled as a place independent
when there is no limit or boundary to be independent of

there is only the essence and illusion of location;
a transparent blur floating within nothingness
devoid of any true position or anchor,
and only measurable in terms of its own sprawl

as that is the nature of the universe,
and as the universe is the ultimate collection of physical matter,
so is the nature of energy,
and all elements of reality

confronted with what can be perceived, 
one cannot possibly find any truth 
in terms of meaning or a connection 
to anything else

as the physical universe has only emptiness and no distinguishable points,
so the mind has nothing to itself but voidness

this life, these images, these emotions;
all of which are consisting of energies
which have no anchoring nor status
and are devoid of acknowledgement of being anything at all.

as the universe is expanding,
all things are sprawling;
the waves and cycles of all things
grow more contrasting and broader

all of these items cannot be named in accordance
to anything but themselves;
and the meaning of this 
is that the very nature of life itself
is perfect and impossibly right 

if this life does not appeal to you,
how can you say a more pleasant one exists?
remembering that there is only infinite voidness,
it is impossible to say that there is any location of thought or life

how great it would be if only things were this way or that way,
you may think
but that way is not possible; 
it is through this present life that those imagined lives exist

and it is only through this life
that you have known suffering enough
to imagine a new life without it.
that life is indeed this life itself, and not existing separately
it was dreamed of in this sleep, 
and to wish for it is to say ‘I wish I were sleeping in that way!’, 
but one cannot sleep in more ways than one at once

an element in a dream is a fabrication of itself.
a single entity cannot be isolated and beheld as being of another dream
when it was this dream that created it.

and so is the sprawl of life and existence
present only in the presence of itself
perceivable only through the transparent perception of itself
and entirely lacking any points secured to anything but itself

through these eyes it is possible to see the malleability of this life
and the true lack of form that is inherent to reality

if this thought is comprehendible, 
all desire vanishes
as life is life
and there is nothing else


             .the rest is being worked on... it'll be up later

__STUPID PICTURES____________

you can look at all of my paintings  right here. I had to move it because they slowed the damn site down. there's no link back... so if you want to come back here... shut up




__Music______________________________


i'm a real musician now


my songs are here

__About the master of all creation_____________

I've got many problems, such as looking too damn young, having one eye that doesn't work, and a stupid ass face configuration. judge for youself. as a child i had fears that weren't right for my age, or maybe just weren't right; i was afraid of being lonely my entire life, i had an intense fear of routines and repetitivity, and i had a fear of operating appliances like dishwashers. when i was 12 years old, i contracted mild insomnia. i do not know why. i began to become interested in philosophy and space, and by the time that i was 13 i had formed my own theories on the universe. Then i read physics books and found out that i was right, and i felt all special. people kept thinking that i was smart, which got on my nerves eventually, so i began acting like fool. i've been that way ever since. at 15 my mild insomnia turned into chronic insomnia, meaning that instead of sleeping a little, i usually did not sleep at all. i've been a buddhist student for 1 year. i try my best to love everyone and i've dedicated my life to compassion and the good of all beings. sometimes my leg goes numb and i don't know why.

and that's it. i'm still lonely and afraid of dishwashers, dammit

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a Goldenfro production

all material on this site is the original work and owned right of myself. Except the few quotes, of course. all of the artwork found stemming from https://www.angelfire.com/jazz/bsgalleryoffunk is also all my own work. if you want, feel free to save the pictures to your computer, so that you can stare at them when you're high. i'll definitely kindly let you use or put any of my material on your site, so long as you ask first and provide a link to the site that it will be on. please do not steal, you greedy fucks

EMAIL- send me things that i won't read at- newjackbrownies@hotmail.com

Or, talk to me about things that i don't care about on AIM, the name is Deependsamsara