Giving
by Liz Griffin
Kathryn Janeway was dreaming. And the funny thing was, she knew she was dreaming. She was dreaming about B’Elanna – another intensely heated fantasy, of the type that had become common on those nights they couldn’t share. When B’Elanna couldn’t be there, Kathryn would go to bed early, treat herself to an hour of sleep that might otherwise be occupied by lovemaking - and every time, her mind made damn sure it was occupied anyway, conjuring up lurid tales of seduction and sex, romance and love-making - absolute bodice-rippers of the type she would never be caught reading.
This time, it was the ready-room.
Leaning against her desk, jacket already hanging loose, her hands roaming over B'Elanna’s back, Kathryn protested half-heartedly through burning kisses, "B'Elanna... wait... we can’t..."
"We are," B'Elanna answered, running her hands roughly over her body, pulling her turtleneck free of her trousers and sliding beneath it, turning her to fire as she captured her mouth again in one of those amazingly deep, toe-curling kisses... Kathryn moaned.
"We don’t have much time," B’Elanna whispered against her lips. "No time... we have to hurry..." her hands slid Kathryn’s trousers over her hips as she knelt, pulling one foot free of her boot to allow her to open her thighs... Kathryn groaned and gripped the edge of the desk.
"Yes," B'Elanna whispered onto her wetness, "yes... so good... so sweet..." she parted Kathryn’s lips with her fingers, holding her open almost painfully as her tongue slithered over her... and then she pressed her mouth to Kathryn’s sex, still holding her open, assaulting her swollen clitoris with hard, fast strokes.
"B'Elanna... God... Yes," Kathryn expelled, her breath already coming in short gasps. Her hands left the desk to come to B'Elanna’s hair, guiding her to the strokes she needed... The desk dug into her hips, her legs were cold, anyone could walk in here... Kathryn pulled B'Elanna to her, bucking into her mouth, moans torn from her by the relentless stroking of B'Elanna’s tongue...
She awoke with a throaty cry, her body pulling her upright in bed as she came, surprised by it, even now... B'Elanna stroked her, B'Elanna pushed her through it, never letting up... Kathryn cried out again in the final contraction, her body slamming backward into the pillows as her lover drew away gently, kissing high inside her thighs lovingly. For several long moments, she stared wide-eyed at the ceiling, panting – then, finally, she slowly lifted her head to meet the eyes of a naked B'Elanna Torres.
"Happy birthday," B'Elanna grinned.
Kathryn glanced at the time – 00:01. She rolled her eyes. "Good... God," she breathed, flopping her head back onto the pillows, one hand moving up over her face and into her hair, palm on her forehead. She smiled, then laughed, that throaty chuckle that drove B'Elanna wild. "Impeccable timing, Lieutenant."
B’Elanna uncurled herself into Kathryn’s welcoming arms. "You are something, you know that?" she said softly, nuzzling Kathryn’s neck.
Kathryn chuckled again. "Well then, you," she kissed her lightly, "are something else entirely." She closed her eyes and rested her head on B'Elanna’s hair. "What a wake-up call," she murmured luxuriously, tightening her arms. Within seconds, B'Elanna felt her breathing even out, deepening... Kathryn stirred, rousing herself.
B'Elanna smiled, kissing Kathryn’s collarbone. "Go back to sleep, Deshoy," she whispered.
"I’m alright," Kathryn whispered. "Just let me get my second wind..."
"You need to sleep," B'Elanna protested, looking up to her and stroking her face.
Kathryn opened her eyes, looking down at her. "Are you going back to work soon?"
B'Elanna grinned. "I pulled a swing shift tonight." She kissed Kathryn lightly. "I’m not going anywhere. But you," she drew Kathryn down, making her comfortable again, "are going to sleep. At least for a little while."
Kathryn sighed, then nodded sleepily, nuzzling against her shoulder. "Aye, Lieutenant... just for a little while..."
"Just a little while," B'Elanna murmured smoothly, hypnotically, stroking Kathryn’s back very lightly. In no time, Kathryn was asleep in her arms, her face relaxed into sweet loveliness, her arms wrapped around B'Elanna in loose embrace. B'Elanna sighed contentedly, perfectly happy to just lie in Kathryn’s arms all night.
And she did. Sleep eluded her, even with Kathryn nearby – and B'Elanna spent the wee hours of the morning watching Kathryn sleep as her lover shifted, as usual, to lie flat on her back. B'Elanna studied her face. Her hair. The rise and fall of her breathing. The perfect shape of her breasts. The sweetness of her mouth – B’Elanna often compared it mentally to that of Khal’MokH, the cup-bearer to the gods, whose mouth was said to be so perfectly formed that Kahless himself had been tempted by it... She traced her fingers lightly over Kathryn’s brow, so smooth and fine, the most delicate porcelain, such a contrast to her own ridges...
B'Elanna contemplated Kathryn’s sleeping form, stared at her lover in the starlight, imagining. Remembering. The quiet breathy sound Kathryn made as she arched, not quite a moan, such soft, gentle pleasure... The sweetness of her lips, a warm, melting softness under hers as they kissed... Kathryn rolling her head back in pleasure, the lovely line of her throat, chin straining toward the ceiling, her mouth open, smiling, sometimes laughing in her joy... Her sweet sounds when they kissed in passion, each exhalation a small sound of helpless pleasure, almost hunger but not quite... Kathryn’s body, so slim, muscular, but not hard, and so slight of frame, graceful... beautiful... The curve of her waist under B'Elanna’s hands, thumbs at her ribcage, holding her up as she knelt above her, arching, her body curved backward in perfect trembling tension, crying out free and clear in inconceivable delight...
You’re all I want, she told Kathryn in her mind as she stroked one finger over her collarbone. Being here, with you, is all I want...
Kathryn awoke slowly, vaguely aware of the aroma that wafted through her quarters... something good... bacon... pancakes... coffee... As she dragged herself to consciousness, she felt a weight on the bed behind her, a warm softness pressing against her back.
"Good morning," B'Elanna whispered, pulling her close and kissing her shoulder.
Kathryn sighed contentedly. "Good morning," she smiled, covering B'Elanna’s arms with her own and snuggling into her. What did I ever do, she thought, to deserve someone so sweet? She turned her head to kiss B'Elanna’s arm. "Tell me that’s coffee I smell," she murmured against the soft cafe-au-lait skin.
"Mm-hm," B'Elanna purred into her hair. "And bacon, and eggs, and pancakes..."
Kathryn groaned in pleasure, slitting her eyes open to look over her shoulder. "Are you trying to kill me?"
B'Elanna grinned wolfishly. "If I were going to kill you, I’d use my hands."
"Oh really..." Kathryn turned in her arms, eyebrows raised. She glanced B'Elanna up and down quickly. "That’s funny," she murmured, running her lips over B'Elanna’s collarbone. "I’d use... other methods." She nipped at the base of B'Elanna’s throat, then ran her tongue upward, stroking over smooth flesh.
B'Elanna drew a shuddering breath. Kathryn? First thing in the morning? It wasn’t possible. She had told B’Elanna before – many times before – that morning was not her best time of day. Kathryn preferred the late afternoon, actually - when it was possible... B'Elanna gasped as Kathryn nipped her again, turning her to her back. This was not like Kathryn at all – she never skipped breakfast unless she was working, and she had to be on the bridge in a little over an hour... This was not a good idea. "I..." she rasped, then swallowed. "I... don’t think..."
"Don’t think," Kathryn murmured, lips lingering in the hollow of her shoulder. Her hands cupped B'Elanna’s breasts, thumbs brushing over her nipples lightly. "Don’t think, don’t talk, and please - don’t stop me." She leaned down and captured B'Elanna’s nipple between her lips, stroking it firmly with her tongue.
B'Elanna arched. Hands in Kathryn’s hair, she pulled her lover close, not knowing if Kathryn would have time to finish what she started, and not caring.
Kathryn finished. Quickly, sweetly, and with every caress her lips and tongue could devise, finally sliding on top of B'Elanna and pressing against her thigh until she reached her own quiet release, wrapped in B'Elanna’s arms. They lay silent for a long moment, panting – and then Kathryn pulled away from her, kissing down her body as she left the bed, on her way to the shower.
"That was... unusual," B'Elanna said later, pleased, as Kathryn wolfed down her eggs, barely coming up for breath.
"Mm. Well," Kathryn murmured, attacking her pancakes, "I’m allowed to surprise you every once in a while, aren’t I?" She grinned briefly before taking another gulp of lukewarm coffee and returning to the scene of destruction that was her breakfast.
B'Elanna grinned back. "Yes, you are." She reached over and ran a hand through Kathryn’s hair. "Not bad for an old lady."
"Ohhhh, I’ll get you for that," Kathryn chuckled.
"It’s oh-seven-fifty-five, by the way," B'Elanna observed, grinning.
Kathryn glanced at the time, then with a sound of distress, lunged for her bureau, across the bed, clearing it in one bounce. She put on underwear and bra at warp speed, rummaged in her dresser hurriedly, pulled out a shirt and slid it over her head quickly. B'Elanna leaned against the wall, watching her in amusement. She sat on the bed, pulling on her socks with equal dispatch. Kathryn made it to the closet in two strides, yanking a pair of trousers from a hanger and pulling them on, then picked up her jacket, shrugging into it as she jammed one foot into a boot. "Aren’t you going to dress," she tossed over her shoulder.
"I think I’ll just stay out of your way," B'Elanna laughed as she got her other foot into its boot and reached for her pips where they lay on the bureau. "You know, I’ve never seen you dress this quickly." She cocked her head to one side. "Undress, maybe..."
"We’ve never made love an hour before my watch," she countered, looking in the mirror as she fastened insignia to her collar. She slid the zipper up, then down to the proper height, and turned to her. "How do I look?"
B'Elanna came to her and took her shoulders in her hands. "Like a Captain," she said softly.
Kathryn tilted her head. "Do you really think I’m old?" she asked equally softly.
B'Elanna smiled. "No." She kissed her tenderly. "I can’t imagine you being more beautiful than you are." Kathryn rewarded her with that perfectly lovely smile. "Tonight," B'Elanna said, wrapping her arms about Kathryn’s waist, "I want to give you something."
"Oh?"
"Your birthday present." Kathryn opened her mouth to speak, and B'Elanna silenced her with a finger at her lips. "I’ve been thinking about it for a while, and I’ve decided..." she drew a breath. "I want you to decide what you want."
"I have everything I want," Kathryn purred, her arms coming to B'Elanna’s shoulders.
B'Elanna smiled again. "I’m giving you myself," she said simply. "Anything you want, for as long as you want – tonight I’ll exist for you, and you alone. Tonight, Kathryn," she kissed her lightly, "I’m yours."
Kathryn’s eyebrows raised, then her eyes softened. She drew B'Elanna close, brushing her cheek against her hair for a long moment. "I’m not sure I deserve such an opulent gift," she finally murmured, sliding her hands over B'Elanna’s body appreciatively.
"You do," B'Elanna answered into her hair. "You do. Just think about it. When you get home, you can tell me what you’ve decided." With great effort, she pulled away. "You’re late for work, Captain."
Kathryn grinned. "I’ll be sure to put myself on report." With one last peck on B'Elanna’s forehead, she disengaged herself and left for the Bridge.
"Good morning, Captain," Chakotay said pleasantly, entering her ready-room not ten seconds after she had seated herself behind her desk.
She smiled and nodded to him, already consumed by the mountain of work that had somehow materialized in the last sixteen hours. "I don’t remember leaving this much at the end of the day," she said as she picked up a padd.
Chakotay grinned. "You didn’t. But I was hoping..." he set another stack of padds on the corner of her desk, "that you might take a look at these evaluations today." She looked up at him, eyebrows on the rise. "We’ve both been putting them off," he reminded her. "Now might be the best time – we’re fairly slow."
Kathryn leaned back in her chair and sighed, glaring balefully at the padds. "It’s my birthday," she said after a silence. "I always make bad decisions on my birthday."
Chakotay grinned again, patting the stack. "Happy birthday, Captain."
"Happy birthday," Kathryn muttered disgustedly ten hours later, finally beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel. She hadn’t had time for lunch – between normal reports and crew evaluations, she had been absolutely swamped. She hadn’t even been on the bridge for more than a few minutes at a time, spending the day behind her desk with a cup of chicken soup at noon and more coffee than she probably should have drunk in one day. Sighing, she leaned back in her chair, a hand coming to her forehead in automatic gesture as the doorchime sounded.
"Come in," she answered, sitting up, grateful for any distraction amid the mountain of administrative minutia that had been the focus of her day.
B'Elanna Torres entered, her face a completely professional mask until the doors swished shut behind her.
Kathryn smiled. "Hello, love." She rose and circled her desk, enfolding B'Elanna in a warm embrace. "What brings you up here?"
"You." Kathryn’s eyebrows raised. "You were late – I wanted to see how you were."
Kathryn glanced at the time. "Oh – I’m sorry," she said easily. "It’s been a bear of a day – I should have called..."
B'Elanna grinned lasciviously. "Well, now that I’m here..." she captured Kathryn’s mouth in a deep lingering kiss.
Kathryn pulled away. "You know the rules," she smiled. "No interrupting each other’s work, no public displays of affection," she stopped B'Elanna’s words with a finger at her lips, "and no making love in the ready-room."
B'Elanna gave her a wolfish smile. "Not even a little?"
Kathryn laughed. "Since when," she grinned, "have we ever had ‘a little’ sex?"
"Good point." B'Elanna ran her hands up Kathryn’s sides. "Did you think about what you want?"
Oh, God... Kathryn’s thoughts raced. She hadn’t had time to think of anything beyond work... not even B'Elanna... "A bit," she said noncommittally, hoping her ambiguity would be taken as an understatement. She flashed what she hoped was her most charming smile and laced her fingers loosely at the small of B'Elanna’s back. "What I want right now," she purred, swaying her lover back and forth, "is a little more time to do what’s on my desk."
"I could get on your desk," B'Elanna purred back, her eyes glinting.
"My work, B'Elanna," Kathryn said, as arousal and annoyance warred for supremacy in her mind.
"Just a little break..." B'Elanna whispered against her throat, sending tingles straight down to her fingertips. Her tongue began to stroke lightly over the spot under her ear that always proved to be her undoing.
"I can’t," Kathryn whispered back, not terribly convincingly, as annoyance began to cave under the pressure. "Not yet..." Oh, mercy, she’s not going to let this drop...
"Tell me you haven’t always wanted to do this," B'Elanna whispered seductively, her hands sliding under Kathryn’s jacket.
With a supreme act of discipline, Kathryn pulled her away, looking into her eyes. "I haven’t always wanted to do this." I never even thought about it before I made Captain, her thoughts continued.
B'Elanna grinned. "You lie." She bent to Kathryn’s throat again. "I know what you want, Kathryn Janeway."
Kathryn felt something flare inside her, a sensation akin to anger – but not quite – something hotter... No. Not here, and not now. But if I don’t get her out of here... Cupping B'Elanna’s jaw, she tilted her head back, moving her hand into her hair to hold her firmly as she gave her best commanding stare. "What I want," she said, her voice very quiet, "is for you to go back to my quarters, and wait for me there. I won’t be much longer, HIqoy – and I want you ready for me when I get there. Understood?"
B'Elanna nodded, her eyes closing slowly. She tilted her head back slightly, offering her lips – Kathryn leaned down to her, bare millimeters from those soft, full lips, exhaling over them.
"Dismissed," she breathed warmly, releasing B'Elanna and stepping back, her hand lingering momentarily at her cheek.
B'Elanna swayed toward her slightly – then opened her eyes to stare at Kathryn in wonder. With a completely sexy smile, she turned and walked out of the ready-room.
Kathryn watched as the doors closed on her back, then leaned onto the edge of her desk. "Oh, good heavens – what did I just get myself into?’
When she arrived home, it became all too apparent what she had gotten herself into. B'Elanna uncurled herself from the couch, walking to her in catlike grace, wearing a red silk kimono that adorned her lithe body far more than it concealed it.
Ohboy, Kathryn thought, swallowing.
"Welcome home, Captain," B'Elanna breathed, sliding her hands up Kathryn’s chest to her shoulders.
Kathryn felt arousal move powerfully within her, and for some reason fought it. Don’t touch her, she warned herself. If you touch her, you’ll both be on the floor inside of two seconds.
And this is a bad thing? her mind countered.
She stared into B'Elanna’s eyes as her lover trailed feather-light fingertips over her shoulders, her hands coming of their own volition to B'Elanna’s waist. For a long moment, she simply stared, feeling the heat pass between them, watching as B'Elanna’s lips parted.
"I know you made me yours a long time ago," B'Elanna murmured slowly, seductively, sliding her palms over Kathryn’s shoulders warmly. "And since then, I've been obsessed with making you mine. Telling you that. Making you say it to me." Her hands slid upward to cup Kathryn’s face. "Tonight, Kathryn," she breathed, her eyes very serious, "I'm yours. "No apologies, no regrets - just yours. I don't have to hear who you belong to," she whispered, then leaned in to exhale the words over Kathryn’s lips. "It's enough that I belong to you."
Moved to passion, Kathryn pulled B'Elanna to her, crushing her against her body in a fierce kiss as B'Elanna made a small sound in her throat. She felt inhibitions stripping away, felt passion take over her body, her mind, her actions... Over and over again, she kissed those rich, full lips, laying claim to her lover in no uncertain terms, her hands rough and insistent on B'Elanna’s beautiful body.
"Mine," Kathryn breathed hotly between kisses, hands roaming over B'Elanna's back. "All mine."
"All yours," B'Elanna answered as Kathryn captured her mouth again, one hand moving into her hair to hold her close. She had never felt as she did now - B'Elanna clinging to her shoulders, nearly passive, responding to her kisses with pure fire... Kathryn groaned and tightened her arms again, forcing the air from her, feeling B'Elanna lean against her in tacit approval of her actions. Never – it had never been like this - she had never been like this... Passionate, yes – she had experienced passion to varying degrees before, certainly – but never this burning desire, this absolute need feel her lover lose control, to see and hear the response of her lover... Passion surged in her as she stroked in B'Elanna’s mouth, bending her backward slightly. She had never felt so powerful, so desirable. Never had she wanted a lover like this... All thought left her as B'Elanna began moving sinuously against her, rubbing up and down on her, straddling Kathryn’s thigh and pressing her heat against her.
Kathryn adjusted her stance slightly, braced her leg up against her lover as B'Elanna undulated so very sweetly, her lips so very responsive, her breathing deepening, quickening – Kathryn moved her hands to B'Elanna’s hips, encouraging her, their lips never parting. B'Elanna pressed against her, moaned into her, ran her hands over and over her shoulders – without thought, Kathryn brought one hand back to her hair, wrenched her head backward roughly, and began kissing over her throat with heated passion.
"Yes..." B'Elanna groaned, pressing against her and tangling her hands in her hair. Kathryn nipped and sucked and licked over her throat, each gasp of pleasure inflaming her even further. She felt in control, but not controlling of her lover, ravenous for her response... She pulled away, watching her lover’s face as she writhed slowly. "Kathryn..." came the almost-pleading whisper. "Please..."
Kathryn felt an astonishing sense of mastery, knowing she could have B'Elanna, or not, please her or not, as she chose... She stared into her eyes for a long moment, letting the tension build even further, feeling her own sense of restraint slip away. She wanted B'Elanna – wanted to please her and take her and enjoy her beautiful body until she screamed for her to stop - and then take her again, and again, until she experienced pleasure beyond her wildest dreams, until she was satisfied beyond any imagining, until there was nothing more left to give...
"This is what you want, isn’t it," Kathryn said, not a question.
"Yes," B'Elanna breathed against her lips, her hips never stopping against Kathryn's thigh.
"You want me to have you, don't you," Kathryn said, not a question.
"Yes."
Kathryn's hands came up to her face, holding her head gently. "Show me," she breathed into her mouth, quietly demanding. "Show me what you want, B'Elanna."
Kathryn closed her eyes as B'Elanna leaned in to kiss her throat hotly. She would have her, she would take her, she would love this woman and discover every last part of her pleasure... She buried one hand in lustrous dark hair as B'Elanna kissed downward over her uniform, lowering her body slowly until she was kneeling on the floor - and then B'Elanna laced her fingers behind Kathryn's knee, bowing her head and lowering herself the final few inches to her boot as Kathryn's eyebrows raised in surprise. Her rhythm never stopped.
For a full minute, Kathryn stood speechless, motionless, as B'Elanna rubbed against her foot slowly. This was not what she had expected - would never have thought of this... This had never occurred to her, never... B'Elanna began to whimper quietly, pressing her forehead to Kathryn’s thigh. Kathryn stood stock-still. B'Elanna was enjoying it – was she giving up control? Did she expect dominance? Was this some Klingon act of significance? Kathryn watched her in stunned silence, not knowing whether to stop her and explain her feelings, or simply let B'Elanna do what she would, as long as she enjoyed it...
"Kathryn... Captain... I want you... so much..." B'Elanna whispered, rubbing her face against the sturdy black fabric of Kathryn's trousers.
In a split second, Kathryn's final inhibition left her. It didn’t matter what the significance might be - B'Elanna wanted her. She was receiving B'Elanna’s pleasure, a gift from her lover, and it really didn’t matter how. One hand coming to her hip, she withdrew her hand from B'Elanna’s hair to stroke over it lovingly. She smiled.
"Yes," she murmured, her voice very pleased. "I can see that."
Kathryn stood, booted feet shoulder-width apart, one hand on her hip while the other moved on B'Elanna's hair slowly... gently... B'Elanna whimpered and thrust against her more insistently, wrapping her arms fully about Kathryn's thigh and calf.
Kathryn smiled. Command is such a convoluted thing... she mused as B'Elanna neared her peak. And so very seductive... She slid her hand into B'Elanna's hair, holding her head firmly as she began to thrust more forcefully, pushing any further musings from her mind as B'Elanna gripped her tightly, moaning against her, pressing her face to her thigh... Kathryn gripped her hair, turning her face upward to watch her as she came.
B'Elanna did not disappoint. With a cry of pleasure, she pressed herself fully against Kathryn, nearly upsetting her balance as she shuddered, coming so sweetly, so hard... Kathryn stared at her, at the upturned face, flushed with her pleasure, eyes closed, the full, soft lips parted in her moans, throat pressed to her thigh, body shuddering... She had never been so beautiful. So alluring.
So mine, Kathryn thought as B'Elanna cried out softly one final time, then relaxed in her hand.
When B'Elanna finally opened her eyes, she found Kathryn just as she had been when she closed them - standing firm, one hand on her hip, stroking her hair and looking at her with gentle authority. Kathryn's hand lifted at the back of her head. "Come to me," she murmured, drawing her up from her shaking knees.
Kathryn held her close, stroking her with proprietary firmness as B'Elanna sighed and relaxed into her. "I want to please you," B'Elanna whispered after a moment.
"I know," Kathryn said with that same quiet authority. B'Elanna shivered in her arms. Kathryn drew away, titled her chin upward. "And you do." She kissed her, gently but firmly, finally drawing away to look into her eyes. "And you will."
B'Elanna shivered again under that burning gray-blue stare. Never would she have dreamed that Kathryn would be like this. Her lover had always seemed equitable - immune to the seduction of power. Every day she held the lives of dozens in her hands - and she always wore her power gracefully, unobtrusively, never making it a visible part of her until it was necessary. She radiated authority, but not control, commanding, but not demanding, even now. B'Elanna could feel Kathryn's authority with every fiber of her being. It was palpable, unmistakable - Kathryn was in complete control of this situation. It was evident even in the way she pulled B'Elanna to her, holding her and stroking her hair. She had expected Kathryn to stop her, to shy away from the appearance of submission, from an act that, for a Human, would be degrading, unheard of... But Kathryn had responded with that same gentle authority, accepting it for what it was – a gift, a letting go. B'Elanna sighed contentedly, surprising herself. She would never have thought she could be satisfied by this type of passion – had never even considered it. By all rights, she should be fighting, growling, screaming – but somehow, she didn’t want to. It was good, letting Kathryn take the lead, letting her decide - even comforting in a way, knowing that she would please Kathryn fully, without question and without thought, knowing that Kathryn would assure her own satisfaction.
Kathryn pulled her back again and kissed her – a gentle, sweet, deep kiss, and yet no less commanding for all its gentleness. She rested in her lover's - her commander's - her Captain's arms, welcoming her kiss, telling her silently how very much she wanted her control... and, as always, Kathryn accepted the gift gracefully, gathering her close and taking her gently.
"Mine," Kathryn breathed again when they parted, cupping her face and sliding the pad of her thumb across her lips. "So very lovely..." her fingertips traced the planes of B'Elanna's face, her brow ridges... B'Elanna trembled.
"I want you," Kathryn murmured.
"You have me," B'Elanna answered softly, amazed at her own compliance.
Kathryn smiled, a completely sexy half-smile... She began to walk B'Elanna backward to the couch. "Not yet," she murmured, their motions almost dancing, moving in perfect synchrony. "Not yet..." she spun them around, sitting on the couch with B'Elanna in her arms. "But I will..." she kissed her again, passionately, and B'Elanna moaned.
Shifting them with effortless strength, Kathryn lay her gently on the couch, her head in her lap, and began stroking her fingernails lightly over B'Elanna's throat. B'Elanna rolled her head back, exposing herself to that maddening touch... She had no idea what Kathryn planned to do to her - and at the moment, she really didn't care. Kathryn's fingers stroked her, teased her... Kathryn parted the folds of her robe, exposing more skin to her touch. B'Elanna arched to her, murmuring her pleasure.
Kathryn smiled. "So beautiful, B'Elanna," she whispered, her fingers straying downward over her breasts. "So very beautiful..." her nails circled first one hard nipple, then the other, as B'Elanna undid her sash, allowing the robe to fall away from her body.
Kathryn's gaze slid over her body appreciatively. "Yes, B'Elanna, so lovely," she whispered, her voice a caress. "I like seeing you like this," she continued, her fingernails sliding over B'Elanna’s body with tantalizing slowness. "So open to me, so willing..." Her fingernails stroked so very lightly, B'Elanna wasn't even sure she was being touched - but they left trails of fire so hot she could have no doubt that Kathryn had. B'Elanna lay under the exquisite torture for what seemed like hours, Kathryn stroking... loving... teasing her with infinite skill... Kathryn's fingers brushed through the curls at the tops of her thighs, combing through them, burning her - B'Elanna arched to her, groaning.
Kathryn slid her hand away. "Not yet," she whispered, coming back to circle her breasts. "I'm not going to touch you there... not yet..." Her free hand stroked B'Elanna's hair as B'Elanna stared up at her, pleading silently.
"You know what I want?" Kathryn purred hypnotically, scratching her nipples lightly.
B’Elanna swallowed. "No..." she managed, fists clenched at her sides.
Kathryn's other hand trailed over the ridges of her forehead. "I want you to touch yourself," she murmured. "For me..." B'Elanna could feel her breath, almost, could smell her desire. "Will you," she whispered, stroking over B'Elanna’s forearm in gentle encouragement. "Will you - for me..."
There could be only one answer.
B'Elanna moved her hand to her wetness, feeling the moisture on her fingers before she even parted her lips. Gods she was hot - so hot for this woman... She slipped a finger between her own lips, gathering up lubrication, then began the familiar, automatic stroking that would bring her to the release she so desperately craved.
Her fingers moved in fast circles, perfect pressure, hard and fast and insistent, just the way she had always loved it - she didn't even have to think about it - mouth open, panting, she focused her attention on Kathryn, on that barely-there touch... Within seconds, she was building toward her climax.
Kathryn's hand slid downward to cover her own, her other hand still stroking over B'Elanna's forehead. "Not so fast," she whispered. "Let me enjoy you..."
"I have to be fast," B'Elanna answered, eyes still closed. "I can't help it..."
Kathryn laughed silently, her hand resting lightly on B'Elanna's. Her fingertips moved over B'Elanna's forehead with maddening precision. "I love this," she whispered, tracing her ridges. "So very lovely... so smooth and elegant... the Quch of a proud house..."
"Captain..."
She felt Kathryn's smile. "Yes?" came the quiet answer.
"I'm gonna... gods..."
"I know," Kathryn breathed warmly. "I can feel it."
"Please... please... yeah..."
"Yes," Kathryn encouraged, her hand never straying from B'Elanna's.
"Gods... Kathryn..." she arched upward, hurtling to the edge... Her wrist was caught in an iron grip, Kathryn pulling her hand away at the last possible instant. B'Elanna roared, "Kathryn!" as her hips bucked uncontrollably, seeking release... She lay panting in Kathryn’s lap, her hand still held firmly - when her breathing had finally slowed somewhat, she opened her eyes to her lover's. "Gods... Kathryn..."
"Captain," Kathryn corrected her softly, lifting her hand and sucking the wetness from her fingers.
"Yes," B'Elanna breathed, still panting, but calmer now. "Captain..."
Kathryn smiled down at her indulgently. "That's my girl," she purred as she replaced B'Elanna's hand, stroking it gently.
B'Elanna groaned, beginning again, the knowledge that Kathryn could - and would - stop her at any moment heightening her pleasure. B'Elanna stroked, circled, lashed herself for Kathryn's pleasure, sometimes staring into her eyes, sometimes rolling her head back and forth on her thigh... And every time she came near her pleasure, Kathryn would stop her, pulling her wrist away with surprising strength, forcing her to hold off. It was Heaven. It was agony. It was the sweetest torment she could ever have imagined.
"Not yet," Kathryn whispered, kissing her hand every time, licking her nectar from her fingertips. "Not yet... you don't want it so fast..." And B'Elanna nodded in agreement, knowing Kathryn was right and wanting it anyway. She knew she could never have held off like this had Kathryn not stopped her – and even as part of her cursed the woman, the larger part, the more overwhelming part loved her for it. Worshipped her for it. Welcomed it and wanted it and gave it willingly, making a display of her pleasure for the woman who held her in such merciless ecstasy.
Again, Kathryn lay her hand back to her mound, directing her fingertip in those very specific strokes... B'Elanna moaned. She stroked hard and fast, her entire arm moving, her body trembling on Kathryn's lap... Kathryn stroked her hair, her forehead, her face - sweet gentle caresses that belied the power behind them. In what seemed like seconds, B'Elanna felt the first stirrings of orgasm deep in her belly. "Captain... oh... Gods... Captain... I'm gonna... come..." she exhaled haltingly, waiting for Kathryn to draw her away, knowing she would and hoping it would be soon. Not wanting to be pulled away from her coming, from the first contractions, she held herself on the edge, Kathryn's hand on her own, waiting... waiting... She had to hold here, Kathryn would stop her... but it was too good, to big, and then she couldn’t breathe and there were lights behind her eyes and her head was spinning and it was strong and perfect and so god damn good good good
"Come to me," Kathryn said silkily.
With an animal groan, B'Elanna arched up, bucking, turning... and she came, crying out in her release as Kathryn watched, smiling hungrily. She stroked herself through it, through it, through it... until it was too much... and she drew her hand away.
Only to have her wrist caught in that same iron grip, holding her hand to her mound, Kathryn's fingers pressing her own in firm circles. "Oh, no," Kathryn breathed hotly, her voice demanding and sweet and passionate all at once. "Oh, no - you're not stopping now... Don’t hold back from me, B'Elanna... Give it to me... all of it..."
B'Elanna cried out, sobbing, writhing as Kathryn pushed her to the limit and beyond... One foot fell to the floor, the other propping on the back of the couch - and she gave her pleasure to Kathryn, all of it, taking the strokes from her and continuing on as Kathryn's fingers slipped downward to slide easily inside her.
"I feel you," Kathryn breathed in wonder, her voice low and deep, "I feel you - so hot - pulsing around me – pulling me in... Yes, B'Elanna," she moaned as she twisted a third finger into B'Elanna. "Yes... so good... I love this... having you... like this..." she lapsed into silence, her eyes closed as B'Elanna stared at her in wonder. Kathryn's face was flushed, her eyes closed, lips parted as she trembled. Her fingers lay motionless within B'Elanna, her free hand gripping her shoulder, as if to hold her still... and then Kathryn's eyes opened to her - and B'Elanna, in that moment, saw her. Saw everything. The power, the pleasure, the confidence, the crushing doubt, the pain of her past, the uncertainty of her future... In that moment, it all became clear, the essence of this woman who held her in such wild passion, who commanded with such grace, who somehow bore burdens no one should be able to shoulder, even in her weakness, her need. Kathryn was hers, she knew – Kathryn had opened to her in a way that B'Elanna instinctively knew she had never done before. And in that moment, B'Elanna gave herself to Kathryn Janeway. Fully. Completely. Joyfully. Without effort and without hesitation. She stared into Kathryn’s eyes, now open and unguarded, letting her into her soul as she pulsed slowly around gentle, motionless fingers that had claimed her so very lovingly... And she hoped that Kathryn could see in her a worthy recipient of such a precious gift.
B’Elanna reached up with her free hand, stroking Kathryn's cheek. "Yours," she said from her very depths, offering the only thing she knew, the only thing she had.
Kathryn continued to stare at her for a long moment, her face softening to an expression of absolute reverence – and then she withdrew from her, pulling her up into her embrace.
"Mine," she answered, kissing her – and B'Elanna could taste her tears as Kathryn possessed her mouth, crushing her body to her. One hand still at her cheek, B'Elanna wound her other arm about Kathryn’s neck, clinging to her as Kathryn kissed her so sweetly, then possessively, then hungrily, their kiss becoming Kathryn’s as she thrust her tongue into B'Elanna’s mouth. And it was exactly the right thing to do, for both of them, B'Elanna realized, filling the need and sealing the promise they had made in their passion, providing a clear demonstration. And Kathryn kissed her again, and again, the kisses gradually slowing, deepening, becoming even more intimate as Kathryn’s lips became melting softness on her own, now soothing her, loving her.
"Mmm," she murmured into Kathryn’s mouth after several long, deep, burning kisses. "I want you..."
"I know," Kathryn answered, her voice heating up again, slipping effortlessly back into that easy authority, this time laced with love and naked desire. B'Elanna shivered. "And I want you," Kathryn said, drawing her up off the couch and taking her wrist, leading her to the bed.
B'Elanna dropped her robe into a puddle at their feet as Kathryn pulled her into another heated embrace, kissing her deeply, almost roughly. B'Elanna brought her hands to the zipper of Kathryn's jacket - immediately her wrists were caught and drawn away.
"Ah-ah-ah," Kathryn warned, looking a bit amused, holding her wrists firmly as she lowered them to B'Elanna’s sides. She captured her mouth again, still holding her wrists, forestalling any attempt of B'Elanna’s to gain any further contact. For some time, Kathryn kissed her that way, possessing her mouth, their bodies barely touching. B'Elanna found it intensely erotic. She longed to press herself into Kathryn, to feel her lover’s strength, her arms – but Kathryn restrained her, forcing her to communicate her passion using only her mouth. And very soon, B'Elanna was burning again, the fire in her belly having no other outlet save for the limited contact of their kisses, only as much as her lover would allow her to give.
It made kissing that much hotter.
After several minutes that felt like hours, Kathryn pulled away from her and took her to bed, lying down beside her. Propping her head on one hand, Kathryn stroked over her body lightly again, eliciting another groan from B'Elanna. Kathryn smiled. Her hand moved smoothly over her body, her belly, her thighs - B'Elanna parted her thighs to Kathryn’s touch, staring at the half-smile that graced her lover’s face, Kathryn’s eyes following the motions of her hand. Gods she was a beautiful woman... Kathryn’s fingers brushed through her hair, combing through it again, pulling very gently... B'Elanna groaned and arched upward.
Kathryn’s eyes came to hers, brows rising. "Be careful what you wish for," she lilted softly.
"Please," B'Elanna answered – and Kathryn’s slim fingers slid into her wetness, circling her lightly, teasing her. B'Elanna groaned again. Kathryn’s smile deepened. Slowly, irresistibly, she led B'Elanna toward release, watching as she arched, smiling when she moaned, her hand the only contact between them as she stroked and stroked and stroked B'Elanna to her pleasure...
"Please," B'Elanna whispered, nearing the edge. "Please... don’t stop me..."
"I won’t," Kathryn answered in that throaty murmur that sent chills down her spine. "No, sweet one," she continued, "I want you to come... I want to see you..."
"Kath - Captain..." B'Elanna whimpered, eyes shut tight against the pleasure.
"Mmmmm?"
"Now..."
"Now," Kathryn encouraged.
"Now – Yes!" B'Elanna cried out as climax overtook her, Kathryn watching her with obvious pleasure. Kathryn did not push her this time, stopped her stroking before it became too much, allowing her to relax into warm contentment. B'Elanna opened her eyes to stare at her lover, Kathryn’s hand warm on her mound.
"Like that?" Kathryn asked warmly.
"Mmmm," B'Elanna nodded, smiling.
"Good," Kathryn breathed, her fingers moving again, gently, but firmly. B'Elanna groaned, the sound more animal than sentient. "Because you’re going to have that until I’ve had enough," Kathryn whispered.
"Gods," B'Elanna breathed, staring at the look of passionate hunger on Kathryn’s face.
"You want it," Kathryn purred, her eyes fixed on the motions of her own hand.
"Yes," B'Elanna answered, already writhing.
"You’ll give it to me, won’t you?"
"Yes," B'Elanna breathed again. "Oh, yes..." she closed her eyes, arms at her sides, somehow knowing she should not touch Kathryn.
"Mine," Kathryn breathed, stroking her firmly now, just the way she loved it...
"Yes – yours – I love it..."
Eyes closed, she did not see Kathryn’s smile deepen. "And so do I," Kathryn breathed – and then sound ceased to exist as her fingers brought B'Elanna to climax again. And again. And again – over and over, until she thought she would fly apart into a million flaming pieces. B'Elanna bucked, B'Elanna writhed, but she did not try to escape those demanding fingers, did not try to stop her lover... her Captain... her friend and mate and mother and tormentor... everything she was, everything Kathryn was, it all became one, merged in consuming pleasure as she gave herself over and over...
Finally, unable to endure any more, she pleaded with Kathryn, her voice a desperate whisper, barely coherent, "No... please... no more..." She swallowed hard in the back of her throat, her head tossed form side to side by the unbearable, torturous, excruciating touch. "It’s too much, I can’t, I’ll die..."
Kathryn’s fingers never stopped as she leaned to breathe across her lips warmly. "No, it’s not," she murmured, lips, nearly touching, but not quite. "Yes, you can," she insisted, pushing B'Elanna further into the drowning pleasure, immersing her in it, filling her with it... "And no," she smiled, her voice at its most dangerous, most alluring, most convincing register, "you won’t."
"Kathryn..."
"Give it to me, B'Elanna," Kathryn breathed over her forehead, still not kissing her. B'Elanna writhed in delicious, unspeakable torment. "Mine," Kathryn reminded her softly. "All mine. I want to see you... see you lose control... for me..."
Writhing, arching, squirming and whimpering, B'Elanna looked up into eyes that were warm, and loving, and completely merciless.
"I love you," she whispered helplessly.
A faint smile played across Kathryn's lips, reducing B'Elanna to nothing but pleasure and fire.
"I know..." Kathryn breathed slowly, absolutely ruthless.
B'Elanna came. Again. Even as she thought Kathryn could wring no more from her, the sound of that voice - so commanding, so confident, so heavy with arousal - sent her spiraling over the edge one last time, writhing under Kathryn's relentless caresses, crying out blindly as Kathryn took her... claimed her... created her...
She lay trembling and sobbing under Kathryn's gaze for some time, Kathryn stroking her hair and her body, not holding her, merely... enjoying her. She heaved a shuddering sigh. If anyone had told her at the beginning of this day that Kathryn would be this way... And even in her exhaustion, there was only one thought – pleasing Kathryn, showing her the ecstasies she had received throughout the night. Kathryn had not allowed her to touch her – but B'Elanna could smell her arousal, could feel it, a palpable tension. She calmed slowly, waiting for Kathryn to give the word, for the second part of the night to begin, sure that Kathryn could not hold out all night... She looked up as Kathryn shifted beside her.
"I want a bath," Kathryn said, the statement coming out as a gentle order.
Before B'Elanna could protest, try to return her pleasure, Kathryn slid out of bed, her hand grasping B'Elanna's wrist, and led her to the bath.
Halfway there, B'Elanna could stand the tension no more and broke away, kneeling in front of her. Kathryn looked down at her, a bemused expression on her face. "Please," B'Elanna whispered, sliding her hand out of Kathryn’s grasp. "I want you so..." She ran her hands up the backs of Kathryn’s thighs, brushing her lips over the front of her uniform. Kathryn’s hand came to her hair as she kissed her, the scent of Kathryn’s arousal reaching her powerfully. Gods, she would have to be so wet... "I want to," B'Elanna breathed, rubbing her face over Kathryn’s crotch, teasing as much as she could through her clothing. Kathryn’s hand rested petal-like on her hip as she stood silent, that maddening half-smile on her lips, watching, as she had when the night had begun. "Please... Captain... let me," she breathed, kissing Kathryn’s hipbone deeply, leaving a wet spot on her trousers. "I can’t stand it... I have to touch you..." She continued to kiss and nuzzle shamelessly at her lover, doing everything but performing oral sex through her uniform, whispering how very much she wanted to, how good she would make it, how she only wanted Kathryn’s pleasure...
After a few long moments, Kathryn's hand in her hair tilted her face upward to meet her gaze. Her eyes were warm, and amused somewhat - she pointed to the bath with her chin. "Step lively," she ordered softly.
B'Elanna groaned against her, sorely tempted to beg, plead, cry -anything that would allow her to touch her lover... Instead she gained her feet and went to the bath. She can’t hold out forever, B'Elanna thought as she filled the tub. She just can’t – or is this what she wants? To deny me this way? Is she really that domineering? She added fragrance to the water, then turned to see Kathryn standing in the door nude, one hand on the frame, smiling at her.
B'Elanna stared at her as she walked the three steps to the tub, then ran a loving hand over her hair, still smiling. She was beautiful, B'Elanna realized for the thousandth time. Always – even when she wasn’t trying to be, Kathryn Janeway was the most exquisite woman she had ever known. In or out of uniform, civvies, nude, in her robe, it didn’t matter. She was always completely lovely.
Kathryn cocked her head to one side. "You’re staring," she said softly.
"You are so beautiful," B'Elanna whispered.
Kathryn’s smile deepened. "And so are you," she answered. She slid into the tub gracefully – How does she do that, B'Elanna wondered – and settled back onto the rest at the foot, sighing contentedly.
B'Elanna stared for another long moment, drinking in the sight, then picked up the washcloth and began to bathe her. She touched Kathryn with slow strokes, long caresses, leaving no part of her untouched, no part of her unloved. I love you, Kathryn Janeway, she thought, caressing the long, slender throat of her lover as Kathryn sighed and rolled her head back. I love you, and I'm going to do everything in my power to make you happy... anything it takes... She gazed down at Kathryn, admiring her body, her face, the beauty of her lover as she caressed her very gently.
Kathryn's lips were curved upward in a blissful smile as she brought the washcloth between her legs... Slowly, carefully, B’Elanna caressed her through the fabric, massaging, stroking... Kathryn began to breathe deeply, releasing her breath in sweet quiet sighs. B'Elanna stroked Kathryn, loved Kathryn, gently bringing her to pleasure... and Kathryn began to arch, very softly, very slowly, her body moving in waves as the pleasure built in her... B'Elanna watched her, watched as she arched up, sighing, smiling... then relaxed... then arched again, chin straining upward, throat exposed... B'Elanna was pierced by her beauty.
Again and again, the waves rolled through her lover... B'Elanna watched in wonder as Kathryn neared her climax, close... close... and then she came, arching and sighing, a quiet cry escaping her only just barely as she came so very quietly...
B'Elanna smiled as Kathryn lay breathing deeply through parted lips. When had she ever loved anyone like this? Trusted anyone like this? Needed anyone like this? When had she ever been so content with a lover, so satisfied... and so sure of her own ability to satisfy? Her hand between Kathryn's thighs, she lay still, simply watching her... Kathryn lay silent, eyes closed, smiling, breathing deeply. Eyes still closed, she whispered softly, "Again."
Surprised, B'Elanna began again. Kathryn had never asked for more – had always insisted once was enough... She stroked more forcefully, bringing her to climax much more quickly, Kathryn arching to her hand and murmuring... As she came, her shoulders lifted from the back of the tub - B'Elanna caught her with an arm about her shoulders and lowered her carefully back down. Kathryn panted for some moments, B'Elanna remaining silent and smiling. Beautiful... so absolutely elegant... Kathryn turned her head, her eyes opening, holding B'Elanna's gaze. She smiled, a very slow, intimate smile.
"Again," she murmured quietly.
Dropping the washcloth, eager to see Kathryn so insistent, B'Elanna slid her fingers over Kathryn, her wetness easily distinguishable from the water... slick... and warm... An arm about her shoulders, she stroked her lover in just the right ways, lavishing all of Kathryn's favorite caresses on every sensitive spot... Kathryn came to her again, arching up to her, crying out quietly, her hand gripping B'Elanna's forearm as she stroked...
She panted for a moment, then opened her eyes to B'Elanna, holding her gaze as she pulled her down for a deep kiss. "Again," she murmured into B'Elanna's mouth, pulling her shoulders to bring her into the tub. B'Elanna slid her body alongside Kathryn's, reaching down between them and stroking her firmly, savoring the gasps and sighs, the moans and cries that fell from her lover's lips. She took Kathryn slowly, savoring her, pleasing her gently, just the way she loved it... and every time she thought Kathryn must surely be satisfied, Kathryn breathed, "Again," the only word spoken between them. "Again..." it became a demand, a supplication, a prayer... "Again..." Until, finally, she lay in B'Elanna's arms, trembling and spent, hands holding her shoulders as she panted.
B'Elanna kissed her tenderly. "I love you," she said from her soul.
Kathryn brought a hand to her face. "And I love you." They lay silent for a moment. "We'd better get out of this water," Kathryn whispered with regret.
Nodding, B'Elanna climbed out of the tub, accepting Kathryn into her arms and wrapping her in a towel. They held one another for a long moment, resting comfortably in one another's arms. Stroking her hand over B'Elanna’s hair, Kathryn murmured into her cheek, "Thank you."
B'Elanna drew away. "What for?" she asked, patting Kathryn dry gently.
"For letting me... for giving me this," Kathryn whispered, eyes closed, her voice sounding on the verge of tears.
B'Elanna took her hand. "Come on," she whispered, leading her to bed and curling up behind her to hold her tightly. They lay in silence for several minutes, replete with exhaustion, satisfied completely... Kathryn’s fingers trailed over her arms as she stared into the darkness.
After a long silence, B'Elanna kissed her shoulder "You... surprised me," she whispered.
She felt Kathryn’s smile. "I surprised me." She shifted to look at B'Elanna over her shoulder. "I’ve never felt that before," she said quietly.
"Mm? What’d it feel like?"
Kathryn turned in her arms to face her, nestling her head in the nook of her shoulder and tracing delicate circles on her back as she mused. "Passionate... and hungry... I felt like I was... commanding you, in a way – but not in control, not as if I were forcing you..."
"You weren’t," B'Elanna murmured, kissing her forehead.
"And loving," Kathryn continued, pulling back to stroke over her cheek. "As if I were giving myself to you as much as you were to me." She sighed, tucking her head back down into the embrace, her voice becoming very small and quiet. "It was frightening, in a way – to let go like that, to take what I wanted rather than ask..."
"I liked it," B'Elanna whispered, pulling her close. "And you were commanding. It’s one of the things I love so much about you," she added to Kathryn’s questioning look. "Your command presence is a large part of who you are," she said softly. "It was the first thing I fell in love with about you, a part of you I love as much as any other." She stroked Kathryn’s hair lightly. "And there are other things – your stubbornness, your background, your passion..." She trailed into an easy silence, content to simply hold her lover for the rest of eternity.
They lay in silence, each in her own thoughts, wrapped in a warm embrace, Kathryn stroking over B'Elanna’s back lightly, soothingly. Very soon, B'Elanna began to drift, her breath warm on Kathryn’s hair, her body going slack in her arms. Nestling herself into B'Elanna’s body, Kathryn closed her eyes tightly against unexplainable tears. For once in her life, it was right. Everything was right. And the sense of contentment and happiness that filled her threatened to overflow completely as she pulled B'Elanna even closer, holding on as tightly as she could, and realized that nothing would ever make her leave this wonderful, sweet, passionate woman.
Nothing in the universe.
Copyright Liz Griffin, 1998. All rights reserved.
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