The Signs of the Black Zodiac
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The Juggernaut
You have no scruples, and no remorse. You'll do whatever it takes to get
what you want, inside or outside the law. Take care not to stray too far
out of the lines; they're there for a reason.
"His M.O. was towing stranded motorists back to the junkyard, where
he would meticulously break every bone in their bodies. But his luck ran
out the night he picked up an undercover cop. Five officers pumped nearly
fifty rounds of ammo into him, and then another clip into his lifeless corpse
just to be sure."
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The Jackal
Something in your past is eating away at you, and rather than deal with
it, you have chosen to withdraw. Not interacting with others, though, is only
making the guilt fester more. Come out of your shell and face your past.
"He gnawed through his straitjacket until the doctors locked his head
in a metal cage and sealed him away in the dark basement cell. There, he
grew to hate any kind of human contact, screaming madly whenever approached.
When a fire broke out in the asylum, he chose to stay behind and meet his
fate."
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The Hammer
You are generally a quiet, hard-working, respectable family man. But you
have your limits, and when you are pushed too far, you can become as fierce
and enraged as a firestorm. Try to control your temper and you'll do fine.
"He tracked down the gang of thugs who had killed his family and beat
them to a pulp with his massive blacksmith's hammer. The local townspeople
captured him and dragged him back to his shop, where he received a brutal
form of frontier justice. Tied to a tree, nails were driven deep into his
body with his own hammer."
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The Bound Woman
Just because you have everything doesn't mean you're better. You've grown
so used to your life of luxury that you've lost touch with the rest of the
world. Your conceit is holding you back... dump it.
"Her friends warned that she'd live to regret her ways, and they were
half right. Two weeks later, her body was found, buried below the football
field's fifty yard line."
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The Torn Prince
You're the star of your own life, and you know it -- maybe too well. Any
affront to your pride can send you off the deep end and cause you to stop
thinking rationally. Don't take it personally if you are beaten at something.
"He held his own for the first half mile and then suddenly lost control
of his little sweetheart. The hot rod flipped three times before bursting
into flames."
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The Angry Princess
You are so preoccupied with outer beauty that you have let your inner self
deteriorate and rot. Unfortunately, no amount of surgery or makeup can cover
that kind of scarring. Be comfortable with you are *now* before changing
anything.
"Alone one night, she tried to perform surgery on herself, but the unorthodox
procedure went horribly wrong, and she was left blinded in one eye. She
finally gave up on achieving perfection, and mutilated herself in a bathtub
until her veins ran dry."
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The Pilgrimess
Maybe you just have one of those faces, but people just don't trust you.
Whether or not you are what people say you are is irrelevant. It's just
your lot in life. Sorry.
"The town rallied in a frenzy, cornering her in a farmhouse which they
lit on fire, but moments later, she miraculously crawled out, still alive
and without a single burn upon her skin. The astounded townsfolk sentenced
her to a slow death in the stocks. There she stayed for weeks while children
stoned her, women cursed her, and men spat on her."
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The Torso
You take chances in life, whether literally, through gambling, or figuratively,
through so-called 'extreme' sports. Lady Luck is a fickle mistress, though,
and will leave you sooner or later. Don't be skydiving when she does.
"The bookie made an example out of him. Actually, several small examples.
He chopped him in little pieces, wrapping them in cellophane and then dumping
them into the ocean."
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The First Born Son
You're an obsessive person, holding tightly to your view of how the world
should be. Anyone who tries to alter that perception is fair game for your
rage. You can't always have it your way; sometimes you have to take what
you can get.
"His parents thought it all a harmless phase, until the day a neighbor
boy discovered a real bow and arrow in his father's closet and taunted the
notorious 'cowboy' into a duel."
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The Dire Mother
You thrive on attention, whether it is good, bad, or perverse. So, you
subject yourself to more and more dangerous acts to hold your audience's
interest. Before long, everyone will be talking about how natural you looked
at your funeral.
"A carnival barker put her on display in his freak show. She didn't
care, as long as she found some perverse form of acceptance. One night while
sweeping up a donkey pen, though, she was raped by the Tall Man and, as
a result, spawned a beastly offspring of her own."
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The Great Child
A perpetual momma's boy, you are overly dependant on others to provide
and care for you. Without that guidance, you would be lost. Don't you think
it's time you started thinking for yourself?
"When he finally found his mother, she had died of suffocation. Filled
with hatred, he grabbed an axe and had his revenge on the circus freaks,
displaying what was left of them in the carnival for every paying customer.
When the owner found out what had happened, he had the boy mutilated beyond
what you and I can comprehend... well, maybe you."
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And I am represented
by...
The Withered Lover
You're an unfortunate victim of circumstance.
You've lived your life tossed about by the whims of fate. Be careful that
you don't lose touch with your true identity.
"As a wife and mother, she was loving and devoted. But her happiness
came to a fiery end one fateful night. Her husband rushed down the hall to
save his children, assuming his wife would make her way outside. He soon realized
that he assumed wrong."
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