Locked Up


I found myself sitting in this jail cell now, somewhere in the middle of Southern California. It was a bit humiliating to say the least, thrown down by police officers in the middle of my great celebratory speech and then tossed into this jail cell. For what? For some unknown fucking reason Alice wants to continue to act like a supreme bitch worthy of actually being smacked around by myself. To think that this all started from a little promo, stupid fucking idea!

I won't sit here and describe the cell, it was cold and hard, that's what you expect. I dropped my head down, grasping my forehead with my hands and trying to make sense of everything, but I couldn't... How could I? It all made no sense, this was all a grand scheme of some little bitch who I shouldn't have even hooked up with in the first place. I know I once thought I loved her, but now I'm just starting to see the person she truly is... Nothing more than a gold digging skank. I should've seen the signs. I get this contract with another wrestling federation and all of a sudden here comes pretty little Alice in her short little dress. The signs, they smacked me right in the face, but I brushed them off like an annoying fly on a summer day.

I looked up now, the guard was staring at me. I shrugged it off and looked back at the ground again, only a second later I would look up again and still see the guard eyeballing me. This infuriated me, I wasn't a circus freak so this motherfucker had no reason to be staring at me so hard. Unless of course he was a little butt chaser... This made me even more irate.

I flung my hands out and shouted, "What? What the hell are you looking at?"

The guard smiled, not at all taking offense to what I said. He chuckled a bit before responding.

"Looky here, big bad Kenny Turner tryin' to be a hard ass in his little cage," he said admidst laughter. "It's not at all a surprise to me that someone like you would beat on women."

The whole situation caused me to lose my anger and instead, I gave it a little laugh myself.

"This is what you think, huh? You think I actually hit her? That's just retarded."

"Oh is it?" he replied, not looking too amused now. "You think hitting women is funny boy? We all know you did it, and even if you didn't, it ain't gonna matter. She's got the leverage here, so you just sit there and wait because when that court date comes, you'll be finding yourself in a bigger jail, we like to call it prison. You know the one where the real big guys walk around and have their way with pathetic little weaklings like you? And by have their way... I mean they really get their way."

"You think I'm weak? Funny that you would say that while I'm sitting behind steel bars. How about you open up that door and show me just how weak I really am."

He ignored me, instead he pretended to turn his attention away from me.

I laughed now, "I thought so tough guy. You see the thing is, I make a living out of beating the shit out of useless garbage like you. It's called professional wrestling and there's a reason that I'm the best."

"You mean that ballot dancing you and another grown man do inside of a ring. Choreographed bullshit, then you dance around and act like you can fight. Try real wrestling," he said with a smirk on his face.

"That's called sports entertainment, that's not the business that I'm a part of buddy. I'm just waiting for you to actually come and try me, why haven't you stepped into the cell yet?" I questioned him, I knew that he would never actually do it. "That's right you fucking pig, no balls!"

He still had a little smile on his face as he slowly turned his head to me.

"It's all good Kenny, you get all nice and cute up in there, I'll be having a little chat with some of the boys that will be on your block in prison... make sure they fix you up all nice and pretty," he said before coming to a brief laugh. "Oh looky here, that whale of a mother you got has come to bail you out. I feel bad that she had to mortgage the trailer."

He stood up now and put a fake smile on his face as I saw my parents enter the room. The guard greeted them, but they paid little attention to me. They made their way over to the cell instead and began to express their worries about me.

"Kenny, are you all right?" my mother asked.

My father chimed in, "They didn't put their hands on you did they? I'll sue these cops all the way to hell."

I began to calm them down, but then the guard chipped in.

"He's fine, I've taken good care of him."

My father turned the guard and raised an eyebrow while staring coldly in his direction, "Is that so?"

"Sure is," the guard responded. "I was just telling your boy how nice it is to actually meet him. It's not everyday that you get to watch after a celebrity after all. I told Kenny how good of a service he's done for this town, he's really put us on the map."

"Can we just get him out of here and go?" my mom asked.

The guard quickly nodded his head and grabbed his set of keys, he made his way over to the door in front of me and put the key into the lock. He made sure he was out of everyone else's sight except mine as he stared at me as if to give me some sort of warning. He then opened the door and let me out. My mother grabbed me first, embracing me in a huge bear hug. My father just gave me a little pat on the shoulder. Then I stood toe to toe with the guard, he was smiling like he just won the lottery. I knew that he wasn't scared, he knew that I wouldn't make a move. He knew I wasn't stupid, if I hit him then I would be going to jail for assaulting an officer.

"Let's go," I told my parents.

We headed out the door and out of the police precent. My father had his old truck waiting outside. I don't know if it was a bad memory of the foul smell inside the truck or the fact that I really just had too much on my mind, but I told my parents that I would just be walking to the trailer park now.

"Are you sure?" my father asked.

"Yep," I replied.

I gave them a little wave as they jumped in the truch and then drove off. I began my walk now, it wasn't that far to the trailer park and I could use the fresh air since being locked up in that cell. After I got back to the trailer park and got my luggage, I would get a taxi to take my to the airport and then fly back to Japan. It was a rough week for sure, but then again that's how most weeks have been for me recently.


To put it plain and simple Jenova, I've fought better. I could also say that I've probably fought worse, but I'm not one hundred percent sure about that one. I'll give you a tip for future reference, stay as far away from me if you can. You're on my bad side right now, it's not a happy side for you or anyone else. I've been on a bit of a rampage as of late and anyone that has crossed paths with me has only seen the light in their eyes dim. You say this is what you want, the Legacy Championship, everyone says this is what they want... but they don't understand.

Does anyone actually see who's hands grasp this title? Is that not a big enough of a deterrent for anyone in PBW? You would think it would be, you would think the feeble minded would have maybe just a bit of sense in them, but I guess that doesn't exactly come with the job does it? You have a reputation of losing, you have a reputation of losing to me, why not stay home this time? Get yourself a good rest, let it all sink in... the fact that you will never ever hold what's wrapped around my waist.

And this is a warning to not only Joey Jenova, but to all of the PBW roster. It's getting a little tiresome trying to kick everyone's ass and give you all a reason to stay away from me, so please just give up. This goes to everyone, from Clauson to Pestilence... Hell, Speed and Silkk sit down next to the Rock and Roll Express rip-offs and take some notes. Kenny Turner is done with all of you talentless fucks. I've proven myself and honestly, there is nothing more I can do. I've given you all a fair warning, now when you don't abide by that warning and in turn choose to step in the ring with me, you'll just have to take the pain as it comes.

I'm not one to toot my own horn, okay I am, but I'm still a modest human being if I do say so myself. So when I am able to seriously look at everyone on this roster and see no true competitors then you know something has gone horribly wrong. Joey Jenova will get what's coming to him tomorrow night and I'm sure Pestilence will get what's coming to her somewhere down the line. Who's after that? I'm not really sure anymore and I don't think I really care. After tomorrow night Jenova, all you will have left is memories of what could have been.