“All hail the king of fools
This boy’s been bad
Best keep him after school
Send me to the blackboard
And write a hundred times
I am a dunce.”
~Voltaire, Dunce

     “You picked the wrong day to mess with me, Malfoy!” yelled Harry as he retrieved the wand from his pocket. “You brat!”
     “Go ahead, Potter. Show me what you’ve got!” Malfoy yelled back, wand ready.
     Harry was about to pull out his most powerful anti-vanity spell when Professor McGonagall intervened. “Stop!” she said, firmly. “Now.” The boys put away their wands and stormed off in opposite directions.
     “I guess I should be glad for people like you,” Harry mumbled. “Otherwise, people like Hermione wouldn’t have above average I.Q.s.”
     Malfoy spun around quickly. “What was that, Potter?”
     Begin the death stares.
     “You heard me.”
     “You are a million years under-evolved!”
     “That’s a big word for such a small wizard, Malfoy!”
     “Harry Potter!” interrupted McGonagall. “I said that was enough! You are better than this.” She nudged Harry onward. “Now move along.”
     Harry managed to get in one last shot of the evil eye out toward Malfoy as he walked away, smirking. Suddenly, Malfoy turned around and shot a spell toward Harry. “Primitive monkey!!!!” Malfoy’s blast missed Harry, who had ducked and instead struck Professor McGonagall.
     Within three seconds, Malfoy’s spell turned McGonagall’s hair to fur which spread over her whole body. Her entire mouth dropped about 4 inches, her nose became a stub, wet and cold. Her eyebrows weighed downward. Her arms gained length which made her large hands drag on the floor when her back slouched about 45 degrees. All while the boys stood side by side in awe while multiple faces of shock took turns spreading across their faces with each piece of the transformation.
     When the transformation was finished, the McGonagall Ape stepped toward the boys, flailing her arms above her head and screeching something incomprehensible. The boys looked at each other. “I think that means ‘go to your quarters.’” said Harry.
     “That’s what I heard,” replied Malfoy as each boy darted in opposite directions, leaving their professor behind.
     Later, in Professor Sprout’s class, Harry and Malfoy continued their battle by shooting each other evil looks from across the room. Suddenly, without warning, Professor McGonagall, fully restored to her normal shape, stormed in the room. Standing at the door, she shouted, “You two! Minus 100 points each! Detention with Mr. Filch!”
     Both students slapped their hands to their foreheads as McGonagall stormed back out of the room.
     “That was interesting,” said Professor Sprout.

~~~
     “Guess who’s goin’ on another trip through the Dark Forest,” teased Filch as he held Mrs. Norris.
     Yes, we know, thought the boys. Very clever, Filch.
     Drawing closer and closer to the Forest, Harry began to fear for his life. “He” could be out there, and most likely, he was out there.
     At the foot of the dreaded wood, Filch stopped dead in his tracks and just stared out into the darkness. The boys expected him to say something fiendish before entering. But he just stared without motion. It wasn’t until Malfoy tried to move that they all realized they couldn’t budge from where they were. They couldn’t move, none of them. They couldn’t speak.
     They all stared into the darkness and the forest stirred suddenly, and Harry felt an awful thrill tickle his scar. Something was coming. Something unspeakable. Some event. Whatever it was soon passed by, but not before he caught a glimpse of a figure completely in white trailing a small flame behind it. And as soon as he could move again, Harry huddled on the ground shivered uncontrollably for just a moment. Filch looked terrified, as did Malfoy, as if they both saw it, too.
     “That’s enough for tonight,” said Filch, quietly, without his usual attitude. “On to your quarters, the two of ya, come on.” The boys scurried off ahead of Filch, whom Harry caught looking back out of the corner of his eye.
~~~
     I know he’s got Daisy and Elora, thought Mr. Malfoy. I fucking know it! Oh, he’ll pay dearly for this. Mr. Malfoy was preparing himself for the battle of a lifetime. The battle Harry has fought many a time in the past.
     I can’t believe I’ve been his puppet from the start! How thick could I get?! He always knew that age-old cat and mouse relationship. Sometimes you’re the cat, sometimes you’re the mouse.
     After grabbing the last item, his wand, he was on the road to Hogwarts. Where else would he strike? “Meow...” he whispered darkly with an evil grin.
~~~
      “Hagrid,” started Harry as Hermione and Ron followed him into Hagrid’s hut. “What do you know about fire demons?”
     “Can’t I go one month without talkin’ to you about some daft topic?” he replied with a bit of a sigh. “I suppose you’ll be askin’ about the dreams, right? Ev’ryone’s havin’ ‘em. Have yerselves a seat, then.”
     The children took a seat on the wooden chairs set around a table. And Hagrid prepared himself to tell the tale of the fire demon.
     “We magic folk’ve been around a long time now. Some are bad, like Mr. Malfoy. Some are worse.”
     “Like Voldemort!” interrupted Ron.
     “Hush now, I’ll be tellin’ the story. And no, I’m not talkin’ about ‘im. I’m talkin’ about the wizard who specialized in the fire element. Ol’ Hyperius Vertex.
     “Long time ago, he set fire to a house belonging to a family of respected wizards. Killed every one of ‘em, poor things. But it wasn’t ‘is fault, it was an accident. Well, the townspeople got so mad at ‘im, they each put their own curse on ‘im and banished ‘im to the Dark Forest. One of the main reasons students aren’t allowed.”
     That must be what I saw last night, thought Harry.
     “Hundreds of years go by and to this very day he’s still lurkin’ about out there. Ev’ry once in a while, ye hear about these house fires burnin’ down some estate down where ‘e use t’ live. That’d be Hyperius’s doin’.
     “The legend of Hyperius Vertex even lives on in some Muggle towns in East London. ‘E’s the one they always warn their children about. They’d tell ‘em to be’ave or else old Hyperius Vertex’ll get ‘em.
     “When ‘e wants blood, there’s nothin’ can stop ‘im. No spell, no curse, no magic, however powerful can protect ye from ‘im. An if ‘e wants ye, ‘e’ll ‘ave ye. Oh, that ye can be sure.
     “’Is arms is so long, ‘e can reach into the furthest hidin’ places. ‘Is fingers can reach up drainpipes. But the funniest thing ‘bout ‘im, even though ‘e’s a great huge bugger, is ‘e can fit ‘isself into the smallest spaces.
     “No one’s ever escaped ol’ Hyperius. No one. Not once ‘e’d made ‘is mind up t’ ‘ave ‘em.
     “’E stays in the Forest now. But thing about ol’ Hyperius, sometimes you don’t need to go near the Dark Forest to find ‘im. Sometimes ‘e comes out. But that’s only when ‘e’s summoned by evil wizards, the most evil. But ev’ryone, even the bad wizards, they know better.
     “Then there’s Voldemort.
     “I ‘spect all you kids’re ‘avin dreams about ‘im ‘cause of the ten year anniversary of Professor Snape’s family’s death when ‘is ‘ouse burned down.
     “I shouldn’a told ye that.”
     “Snape had a family?” asked the three teenagers, sitting up in their chairs.
     “I am not tellin’ ye about Snape’s family. ‘S not my place to tell.” he said simply as he rose to open the door. “Now off with ye, I’ve no more time to be entertain’ you three all day long. And don’t go tellin’ anyone what I told you, ye hear?”
     “Yes, Hagrid,” they answered, walking out the door.
~~~

On to chapter 4