"Fuck! Goddamnit. Fucking stop that shit already!" Marshall yelled, yanking his hand away from AJ's.

AJ clenched his jaw and grabbed a hold of his wrist again, pulling him back into position over the sink. "Shut your whiny ass mouth up already and let me do this will you?"

"What the fuck did you just say to me?" Marshall snarled, staring at AJ's profile as the younger man held his hand firmly over the sink, bent over it in concentration.

AJ ignored him. Marshall had flung every threat in the book at him in the last ten minutes while he'd treated and bandaged his other hand. He decided he was long past being scared of him. Either Marshall would take out a hit on him or beat his ass or God forbid, actually be grateful come morning for his help or not.

Whatever happened, it was out of AJ's control. He still wasn't even entirely sure why he was helping him in the first place. He'd have to think on that later when Marshall wasn't hurling threats in his ear.

When he didn't get a response, Marshall clamped his mouth shut and glared at AJ's back. He wasn't really pissed at him anyway, he was pissed at himself for doing something so asinine as beating the shit out of over a ton of metal with his bare fists and then sticking one of those fists through a window.

He winced as AJ poured more alcohol over his cuts and bruises. First thing he was going to do once his hands got better was go to the fucking store and buy some of that non-pain inducing antiseptic cleaner shit.

After another minute of torturing Marshall, AJ finally declared his cuts cleaned out, and let him pull his hand away again. "It's about time for fuck's sake. Shit that hurt."

AJ shook his head. "Maybe you should invest in a punching bag to carry around in your trunk so you have something a little less destructive to your hands to beat on."

Marshall rolled his eyes like it was the stupidest idea he'd ever heard. When AJ turned to him with salve and bandages ready to go though, Marshall's gut clenched, knowing a whole new round of pain was about to start and mumbled, "Maybe."

As AJ gingerly applied the salve, he commented, "I don't know why you just didn't let me take you to the hospital. They probably could have given you something stronger than Advil for the pain."

Marshall grunted as AJ finished applying the salve and started wrapping his hand in gauze. "Yeah well, number one, if I'd went to the fucking hospital, there would have been questions. No one would have believed my stupidity and they would have assumed I'd been in a fight. I don't need or want any more damn press about me fighting, especially since I'm still on probation."

Both of them were surprised that Marshall had actually answered AJ's question straight up instead of coming out with something sarcastic. AJ wasn't going to dwell on it though. He was too curious about number two.

"And number two?"

"What?" Marshall had been staring at AJ's hand that was cradling his wrist as his other hand wrapped the gauze carefully around his bruised and cut up flesh and had lost his train of thought.

"You said that was number one. What's number two?"

"Oh. Don't want no prescription painkillers." When AJ shot him a curious glance, Marshall impulsively elaborated, "I like pills a little too much."

"Oh. Yeah, I can understand that one." AJ said, turning his concentration back to the matter at hand, slightly uncomfortable with Marshall letting him into his head that way.

"Figured you could." Marshall said, equally uncomfortable and wondering what had possessed him to tell him that.

They were quiet the rest of the time AJ wrapped his hands up.

Ten minutes later, AJ was on the phone with Kevin. "Listen. I told you I'm sorry about earlier. Just get over here and pick me up, will ya?"

Marshall tried to pretend he wasn't listening while AJ talked, but he was. After a short pause AJ continued.

"Yeah, sure, whatever. We can talk at my place after you get me." AJ turned to Marshall and asked, "Hey, what's the address here?"

Marshall rattled it off and listened while AJ relayed the information to Kevin.

"Kevin, stop it. Stop. It."

Pause.

"It is."

Pause.

"No I haven't lost my mind."

Pause.

"What? Fuck you, I am not using again, or drinking. Do I sound drunk or high?"

Pause.

"I don't need a fucking shrink. Just get over here and get me before I change my mind and call a cab, ok?"

AJ slammed down the phone without waiting for an answer and started pacing.

"You guys have a fight or something?" Marshall asked as he watched AJ wear a whole in his carpet, referring to the apology AJ had given Kevin over the phone.

AJ paused, shooting Marshall a strange look like he was contemplating telling him something. Finally he said, "Yeah, at the party earlier. That was why I was on that balcony in the shadows. I was hiding out from him."

Marshall had the distinct impression that there was more to it than AJ was letting on, but he'd be damned if he pressed him on it. It wasn't like he cared anyway. AJ was just a guy who had helped him out. Didn't mean he wanted to know all the little details of his life. Before he could stop himself though, he asked another question.

"Why did he think you were high or drunk just now? You fall off the wagon or something?"

AJ stopped pacing and flopped down on Marshall's couch, wondering fleetingly why he was playing twenty questions with him. "No. Contrary to tabloids nationwide, I've been clean and sober since I stepped foot into rehab last summer."

After a short pause, he added, "He heard your voice when you gave me the address and recognized it. He's convinced I'm either on something or I've lost my mind."

Marshall snorted. "Yeah, well, at least he asked you. If my guys knew you were here, or that I let you grope me twice and wash my face and shit, they'd send the guys with the straight jackets over and ask questions later."

AJ laughed. "You know, I was serious, man. You've got issues. I did not grope you. If I had, you sure as hell would have known it. As for the guys with the straight jackets…I'm not entirely sure they won't show up here for me. Kevin wasn't completely convinced of my sanity when I hung up on him."

They were silent for a moment, and then AJ commented. "Fuck. I should have just called a cab and met it down the block. No one at the cab company would have thought I was here in a million years if I'd done that. Kevin is going to ream my ass for this."

Unknown to Marshall, AJ meant that literally. Now that he was sitting there thinking about it, he realized Kevin was going to pick him up and take him home, then hold him to that little "talk" he'd promised in exchange for the ride. Knowing their track record, Kevin would go on and on about him helping Marshall out and AJ would end up letting him fuck him just to get him to back off on the Marshall angle. Then he'd be back at square one with him in his quest to try to get Kevin to see that they were actually over.

Marshall shook his head. "You mean all that bullshit about him being the 'daddy' of the group was actually the truth?"

AJ shot him a surprised look. "Didn't know you kept up on Backstreet trivia."

Marshall shifted in his chair. "Yeah well, couldn't write lyrics bashing you pansies if I didn't."

AJ smirked at him. "You don't write lyrics bashing us."

"What? Fuck if I don't, I mentioned you guys once in a song." Marshall said defensively.

"Yeah, you mentioned us, but that was it. You write lyrics bashing Nsync. Not us." AJ insisted.

Marshall rolled his eyes as if that was a small technicality. "You're all fucking the same anyway." After a short pause, something hit him. "Hey, wait. How the hell would you know?"

It was AJ's turn to shift uncomfortably. "Uh, lucky guess?"

"Right." Marshall said, sarcasm dripping from his voice. He continued to stare at AJ until he finally broke.

"Ok, ok. So I buy your CD's. You've got a lot of talent. I like the way you rap, even if I don't like all your lyrics. That's not a crime, is it?"

Marshall wasn't sure why that admission made him want to smile, so he resisted the urge and said, "No, just a surprise."

AJ wasn't going to ask him. He wasn't. He'd probably get his ass beat for even suggesting it. Oh, wait, he wasn't scared of him anymore. "Do you have any of ours?"

Marshall nearly fell off the chair, shocked he'd asked that, and even more shocked he was about to answer. "Uh, well, you know, I get them for free and shit. I just haven't gotten around to tossing them in the trash yet."

AJ's jaw dropped and he started to wonder if he wasn't on some bad acid trip or something. Maybe that bartender back at the party had slipped something in his drink and now he was delusional. There was no fucking way Marshall had just told him he had their CDs.

"Excuse me?"

"Fuck you. Fans send them to me. They can't figure out why I don't bash you guys like I do Nshit and they figure I just don't have enough material to do it with. So I get CD's, articles, first hand accounts of times they've met you, shit like that."

"Damn. That's just…fuck, that's funny shit." AJ said, loosing his battle not to crack up.

"What the fuck is so funny, bitch?" Marshall asked, having a hard time keeping the smirk off his own face. He liked hearing him laugh, and refused to analyze why that might be.

"I'm just picturing you opening your fan mail and finding shit about us there. Must be the highlight of your day." AJ said as he continued to crack up.

Marshall lost his battle to keep a straight face and chuckled. "Yeah, well, makes for interesting reading and listening…you know, when I'm so bored I want to slit my damn wrists just for something to do."

Just as AJ was about to say something else, there was a knock on the door. They both looked at each other and without a word, AJ got up and went to another room out of sight. Just in case it wasn't Kevin.

Marshall got up and started for the door, before realizing he couldn't open it with his hands in their current condition. Half way there, he yelled out, "It's fucking open!"

Kevin stepped inside, completely convinced he was in the twilight zone. After he'd gotten over the initial shock of realizing AJ was at Eminem's house, and after AJ had convinced him he wasn't stoned or drunk, Kevin had started to wonder if it was some sort of practical joke. AJ was known for those. But now there was no denying it was real as he stood there in the entryway staring at the bleached blond rapper.

Marshall sized him up for a second, then called out to AJ. "It's all right, it's just your bitch!"

AJ stepped into view, shaking his head slightly at the questioning look in Kevin's eyes, knowing the older man was wondering if Marshall knew about their past because of that last comment about him being his bitch.

"Are you ready?" Kevin asked.

"Yeah, just a sec." AJ said, turning to Marshall, he asked, "You sure you don't want me to call anyone?"

Marshall rolled his eyes. "Yeah I'm fucking sure. I told you, everyone's in goddamn Detroit and New York right now. Well, except for Pete, but he's probably out getting laid, and who the fuck knows where Dre is by now."

"Still, I mean, you can't do shit with those hands. You need someone to stay with you."

"Alex…" Kevin said impatiently.

He had noticed Marshall's bandaged hands, but he could have cared less. He just wanted to get out of there and get AJ back home so they could talk…and maybe a little more.

"Kevin, shut up."

Marshall blinked at the venom in AJ's voice, realizing whatever they argued about earlier must have really pissed AJ off. Even when he and AJ had that confrontation in the bathroom and AJ had been on top of him nearly choking him, AJ hadn't sounded like that.

Deciding he didn't care to be there when and if AJ and Kevin's fight blew back up, he said, "Listen. Just fucking go. I've gotta go piss. See you around."

AJ watched him leave the room, his eyes involuntarily dropping to his ass to check him out. He had a damn nice ass, even through baggy jeans. Turning back around, he noticed Kevin watching him. The hard glint in Kevin's eyes told him in no uncertain terms that he'd noticed what he'd just done.

Before AJ could say anything though, they both heard Marshall shout out, "FUCK!" and then a series of loud bangs could be heard.

AJ rolled his eyes and sighed. "Here we go again."

Kevin's brows knit in confusion. "Here we…" He trailed off as AJ suddenly turned on his heel and headed down the hall in the direction Marshall had went. "Alex, where are you…"

"Be right back." AJ called over his shoulder before disappearing through a doorway.

Marshall was busy kicking the wall and cursing when AJ found him in the bathroom.

"Trying to fuck up your feet now?"

Marshall jumped, having thought he'd left already. Stopping his ranting and kicking, he turned to see AJ braced by his shoulder in the doorway, arms crossed, a bored expression on his face.

"Fuck off."

AJ was undaunted. "Not until you tell me what's wrong."

"None of your goddamn business." Marshall snapped.

"I've got all night." AJ said not budging an inch.

Marshall sighed, unable to believe he was about to say what he was going to say, but knowing it beat the hell out of telling AJ what was wrong. "Listen, AJ. I appreciate everything you did for me tonight, but just go, ok? I'm fine. I'll be fine."

AJ was shocked silent for a moment. Finally he found his voice and said, "Thanks."

Marshall shrugged and looked away. "Yeah, well. You did a lot for me tonight. I still don't know what the hell your reasons were, but there ain't a hell of a lot of people who would have went out of their way for me that way."

"Alex."

"What?"

"You want me to call you Marshall, well then call me Alex. That's what people call me when I'm not out in public." That wasn't the complete truth. Only Kevin, his family and Brian on occasion, called him Alex, but for some reason he didn't want to think too much about, he wanted Marshall to call him that too.

"Oh."

"So tell me what's wrong."

Marshall cleared his throat and mumbled under his breath, "Can'tgetunzipped."

"Huh?" AJ said, unable to make out his words.

Marshall sighed. "I said, I can't get unzipped. Or unbuttoned. Or even fucking unbuckled for that matter."

AJ's eyes dropped to Marshall's pants and he swallowed, not sure if he wanted to offer what he was about to offer or not. Lifting his eyes back up to his face, he asked, "Need some help?"

Marshall stiffened. Did he? The thought of having a guy unbuckle and unzip him made him want to run from the room screaming, but he had to piss so bad his bladder was about to explode.

"Well?" AJ prompted.

"I don't know, ok? I mean…you're a guy, and one I barely know for fuck's sake."

"Want me to call Pete? Can you even wait however long it'll take him to get here?"

Marshall looked appalled. "Fuck no I don't want you to call Pete. I sure as hell don't need him doing that for me. He'd never let me live it down."

"Well then, unless you want me to get Kevin in here to do it for you, I'm about your only option."

Marshall turned away from him and leaned his forehead against the wall, his arms hanging at his side as he studied his feet, contemplating his options. "This is so fucked up."

"I'm not going to make a pass at you, you know." AJ said, crossing the room to stand near Marshall, but not too close.

Marshall jumped at how close his voice suddenly was. Turning back around, he muttered, "Yeah, I know."

"You do?" That hadn't been the response he'd been expecting. He'd thought Marshall would come out with a smart ass remark.

"Yeah, you didn't really grope me when you had your hands down my pants earlier. I suppose I can trust you not to grope me now." Marshall admitted grudgingly.

AJ was floored. "Damn. Why do I get the feeling that's a huge thing for you? The trust thing."

Marshall shrugged, a little floored himself with the concept. "Maybe because it is. Now shut the fuck up. I don't want to go getting into any deep personal discussions with you here and now. Can you just get it over with already? This shit's humiliating enough."

"Sure," AJ said, licking his suddenly dry lips as he stepped closer, having no idea how he was going to manage it without wanting to jump him.


Chapter Four
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