NERD TEST 2

1. A friend opens a magazine full of scantily-clad members of your preferred sex.  Do you:
A. Openly Ogle
B. Act Non-Chalant
C. Comment "Gee, that's got to be at least 400 dpi, colour!"
D. Slip the hand down the pants for a bit of good, old-fashioned executive relief.

2. You're at a party.  Someone comes over and asks you your star sign. You:
A. Tell them to bugger off
B. Lay them one in the groin, then tell them to bugger off.
C. I don't go to parties.
D. I don't get invited to parties.

3. You're at the head of a large queue in front of a cash-register in a large department store.
   The register gives a beep and stops dead. You:
A. Wait patiently
B. Plant all the stuff you were going to buy in a nearby baby carriage and call the store detective.
C. Break out your ever-present Pentium notebook and try to debug the thing
D. I don't know
 
4. You're shopping for some personal hygiene equipment when the chemist runs up saying the 
   prescription database on his 386 is corrupt. You:
A. What's a prescription database?
B. What's a 386?
C. What's personal hygenie?
D. What was the question again?
 
5. A friend wants to borrow a record off you.  You
A. Lend it out, and tell them it's a boomerang.
B. Tell them to go buy it.
C. Consult the database to see that status of the record concerned
D. Sell it to them for a beer.
 
6. You'd most like to meet:
A. The person who wrote "Gulag Acapeligo"
B. The person who wrote "War and Peace"
C. The person who wrote MSDOS
D. A person who can write
 
7. You win a "Grocery-Grab" at a local supermarket.  
   You've got one minute to pack a cart with as much stuff as you can.  You start:
A. In the Liquor Section
B. In the Confectionary Lane
C. At the Pencil Bar
D. At the cash register
 
8. You've been hit by a car and your life flashes before your eyes. 
   The thing you remember most vividly is:
A. Your Mother's voice as a child
B. Your first Love
C. The Ascii table.
D. The tire pressure was maybe a little too high
 
9. You get to compete on blind date.  
   You have one statement to change the choosers mind about you.  You say:
A. I've got a 12 inch tounge
B. I can go all night
C. I'VE GOT A 500 Mhz Alpha station with 128 megs of ram
D. I've killed 5 people
 
10. You feel naked without your:
A. Electric Guitar
B. Wallet
C. VT100 reference guide
D. Axe
 
11. You see someone standing on a ledge, about to jump. 
    You can save them if you say the right thing.  You say:
A. I know things are bad, but do you want to talk about it?
B. I feel you just need someone to talk to
C. Want to come and play on my notebook, I have Myst?
D. I bet you haven't got the guts.... . . .  Oh, I see you did...
 
12. You told your best friend the first time you:
A. Had Sex
B. Had Oral Sex
C. Got a Ram expansion
D. Killed a cat.
 
13. No-one understands you like:
A. Your Mother
B. Your Father
C. Your PC
D. Your Parole Officer
 
14. For your 18th birthday you wanted:
A. A Car
B. A Shaver
C. Another 4.6 Gig SCSI hard drive
D. Some Piano Wire, and the Neigbours Cat
 

Scoring
Mostly A's:
You're normal.  Boring Boring Boring.  
You're the sort of person who'll justly fritter their way thru life enjoying themselves and having a good time. 
Shame on you!
 
Mostly B's:
You're mostly normal.  
Nothing a little ECT can't clear away in any case.  
You mostly come into the "Mostly A's" above.
 
Mostly C's:
Geek Alert!  
Break out the pocket protector!  With a set of horn rims and a pocket calculator, you're ready for Revenge Part #72.  
You can be the person that gets beat up all the time.
 
Mostly D's:
So you're a sociopath;  
But that doesn't mean you're a bad person.  Just keep taking the Lithium and everything'll be fine


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