Title:   MILD MANNERED REPORTER FROM A MINI-METROPOLITAN NEWSPAPER

 

Co-authored by:      Bill   and   PM--Suzanne

 

Date finished:     March 22,  2002

 

 

 

 

          This morning, my big old magnifying glass came out of storage, and I crawled out into the yard to see what I could find in nature's microcosms.   I saw something looking back at me.

 

          The creature seemed rather cheerful, was carrying what appeared to be a little glass tumbler, and was wobbling rather unsteadily on about ten skinny legs.  Drunk, the creature was tipsy, two sheets to the wind, inebriated, skunked and incoherent.

 

          I could see that the little guy was trying to communicate something to me by the way his tiny mouth was moving, but because of the high pitch, low volume, and way he was slurring his words it was impossible for me to decipher what he was saying.   It must have been words of amazement as my image came into focus for him as a giant eye behind the glass, enormous red hat and freckled hand.

 

          Apparently, my little friend knew he wasn't communicating well, because after a moment of jabbering, he pulled several notepads out of various pockets and began to scribble messages with as many tiny hands.   I think one of the scribbles said "friend" and I put the end of my finger within reach of the little creature. 

 

          I was too late to abort my faux pas, since our size difference did not permit shaking hands, but the critter just graciously put a few pairs of hands together and bowed in oriental style.  Thus began a relationship that was to last for many years.

 

          It turned out that my friend with all the notepads was a reporter for the humorous Indian insect newspaper, "Mini-haha", and I became his principle contact in the world of giants.  Over the years we cooperated on many experiments which could benefit both mankind and bugkind.

 

          The first of our experiments had to do with a contractual and unionized time sharing agreement for kitchen facilities.  Our method of communication consisted of scraps of paper, writings, a slow speech of sorts and lots of laughter.  To some extent I could overcome my problem hearing his squeaky little voice by using a stethoscope, which he spoke into. 

 

          Our final experiment involved getting all the varieties of bugs to get along with me and each other.  The mosquitoes refused to go vegetarian, though, and the ants didn't have the will power to stay out of my sugar bowl, so negotiations eventually broke down.

 

          My little creature has been a better friend to me than many of my human friends.  Not a bigger friend, but a better friend; one I can really see eye-to-eye with (when I'm lying on my stomach).  It just shows that friendship can happen anywhere, anytime, with anyone.

 

                            The End