September 01, 2003 (Monday)
Now Open for Business
I've done it: my very own personal web site. These things are all the rage these days (like those strange-looking shiny top things little kids carry around all the time - even in the bathroom). Everyone I know has a picture posted somewhere on the 'Net. Every grandmother has a web site dedicated to their pet cat. Second year college students with small cocks have web sites about their souped-up Honda Civics. Computer geeks have their own domain names and run web sites dedicated to showing off what they can do with computers while one of their thumbs are fingering them in the butt. The Internet is CB Radio of the New Millennium. It's either you make your presence felt (somehow - however tiny it may be) or spend the rest of your existence wishing you did.

I figured that the risk of losing my hard-earned individuality is a small price to pay for discovering what goes on in the minds of people who pull off eye-popping shit like this. Whatever their secret is, as long as it is not along the lines of not changing your underwear for three weeks and/or living in your parent's basement for the rest of your life, I have made it a personal mission of mine to find out how they do it and do it myself. Hopefully, one of these days (unless, as with everything else in my life, I end up losing interest and ditch this little "project" in no time flat) I'll get cute little spheres to spin around my site, as well. At this point, I am definite that I will be getting groupies within the first few months of operation. If FM radio is any indication, handsome web sites, like handsome voices, make you appear more attractive (and sexy) than you actually are.

Once I do accomplish what I sought out to discover, the next step will be to simply eliminate the competition (which shouldn't be very hard - I have the feeling that computer wizards' line of defense are limited to whether or not you are using a computer at the moment. What else are they going to do? Threaten to e-mail a Trojan to your nervous system?) and I will be the undisputed King of Personal Web Sites!

And then, the WORLD!