.compromise.
I'm not the one to usually write that much
but in this case, I'm dealing with feelings and such
many occasions I do all that I can
just to hear you out, to listen, to understand
and sometimes I question if what we have is real
because I know my heart's in it, but tell me, how do you feel?
I've tried to iron and clean this wrinkled shirt
but ended up straightening one side out, and leaving the other to the dirt
and everytime there's a problem, we go to our sides
waiting to approach each other, waiting to ride
to that middle line, where we can look in each other's eyes
and realize that there can be a real compromise
but far too many times, I'm the one being beat
because I'm walking too much, and I'm getting sore feet
I'm having to stand there on the middle line
and getting stood up, more and more every time
you stay in your corner, doing what you do
and I stand gazing, hoping to meet you
so then I figure that if I don't move
nothing's gonna happen, and shit won't improve
so I cross the line, and go that extra mile
because I care for you, and I miss that sweet smile
and I'm getting worried, 'cause though you say you care
it might be all words completely filled with air
and I understand that this rhyme sounds quite absurd
but I'm telling you now, actions speak louder than words
and that's why I cross that line, and fight to make things work
'cause I want you in my life, am I being a jerk?
for caring for you, for making that attempt
but nah, I don't think you see it, and my heart's feelin' spent
I'm your man at convenience, like a 7-11
but you're my angel, the girl I dream of, sent from heaven
but would heaven do this, and let my heart ache?
and tell me these feelings are real, when they could be fake?
I know there's a reason, so I don't doubt heaven
so why are you making me feel like an upside down seven?
am I loser, who's hopelessly caring?
cause I find myself waiting and constantly staring
and gazing with the hope that you tie your shoes and start walkin
to that middle line and stop all of this talkin
will you meet me at compromise, or should I buy a new map?
because maybe you don't want me here where I find myself at
and I'm sorry for spilling my heart, but I need to let you know
should I stay here at the line, or do you want me to go?
broken.
broken hearts.
shaky starts.
and I never knew
to play which part.
I gave it my all
but in the end,
I couldn’t be your boy
but only your friend
I’m broken.
all over I’m shaking.
cause the feeling inside
feels so mistaken.
and I keep asking
what could be the cause?
I keep blaming myself…
that can’t be what it was.
I’m typing this thing
cause I couldn’t finish writing.
my hand kept trembling,
emotions I kept fighting
when words would hit the page
I couldn’t stop to the think
cause I’d look down at my words
and the tears smeared the ink.
(right now I feel so lonely. I’ve broken to pieces. I’m raking up my heart just to gather myself. I let you know everything so you would know it wasn’t a game…I gave all I could….)
None of these words rhymed
‘cause I’m straight up speaking my mind
but I’ll go back now, from prose to poetry,
to help me pass the solitude, this lonely time.
I know I never told you
but these words are true
I wanted to say it
but I did love you.
but instead I didn’t tell you,
instead I stayed still
‘cause I know it’d weird you out
and I know how you’d feel.
what we had was different.
what we had was unique.
sometimes it was a pain
sometimes it was a treat
I felt like you didn’t want me
I never got feedback
I never knew if I was good
or if I was totally whack.
but I never stopped tryin’
I’d do what I could do
cause I really really cared
and I opposite of hate you.
pacman without miss pacman.
bboy without bgirl.
I feel like someone punched the air out of me
I feel a huge blow to my world.
but you’re not gone
you’re still in my heart
I’ll always have the memories
and I guess that’s somewhat of a start.
just to help me deal,
getting lost in a stare
when I look at the stars
I’ll take that walk to remember
fifty roses may wither
stems may grow thin
but God’s love will shine
and hearts will mend
you gave me so much
I can’t thank you enough
even though sometimes
the road would seem rough
but I’ll always keep you close
if not in my arms, my heart
cause loving you means having to let go
and I guess that’s where I’ll start.
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