Here are some great pranks that you can pull.  They are all legal, cheap, and mostly safe.  So have fun with these and be a hooligan!

If you have any pranks, email them to me at

The Greatest Prank in the World


The setup is very simple. You don't need anything except what I listed above. You don't need an accomplice, although these adventures are often more fun when pulled off with a comrade. Whether or not you act alone, here are...

The Instructions:

What happens? The sponge expands as it gets wet. But it is getting wet as the current goes down the pipes. The effect is a well-clogged pipe because the sponge will not fully expand until it is a good distance down the pipe.

Important: You must not drop in the sponge and then flush the toilet, as the sponge will just expand and bob around in the bowl. Flush then drop.

Keep in mind that you could carry around a good number of these little bombs in a jacket. If you use a backpack, forget about it. You could easily tote around a few hundred and really party ass. A big company will have several bathrooms and it takes seconds to run down a line of toilets, bombing each one. You can really hit several toilets in less than one minute.

The other nice thing about this prank is that the required materials are cheap and totally legal. Plus, the prank doesn't hurt anyone. Ignore anyone who says that this type of mischief costs money to fix and will ultimately hurt the consumer. If you hit a credit card company, oil company, or something along those lines, you should not feel an ounce of guilt. They are already screwing you.

A nice variant of this trick is to soak the sponge in a simple cement mixture of cornstarch and water. The mixture will set slowly in the pipes, making removal a colossal pain in the ass.

Light bulb Go Boom!

Exercise more than average care when doping this one. It involves electricity, which we know is the enemy of alcohol. You won't be messing with live wires, but it is still a little dicey.


Dismantle a light bulb so that the filament is still intact and insert a firecracker fuse into the filament. Carefully tape the firecracker to the light bulb's base so it doesn't pull out the fuse. Place the bulb in a lamp, ceiling fixture, etc. Then all you do is wait until the victim turns on the light. Confusion is followed by fright as the person hears the fuse burning and then hears a loud pop.

Another word about this prank: Be careful with the light socket. If you're a bozo and shock yourself, don't complain to us. It's a bit dangerous and unless you know what you're doing skip it in favor of something simpler.

The Wild World of Petroleum Jelly

The are so many good Vaseline pranks I don't know where to start. For brevity's sake I will just cover three of my favorites, all simple and all very effective. Consider these the ultimate in beginner's pranks. It's hard to screw them up and nobody can get hurt.

Scenario #1

Spread Vaseline all over someone's windshield. That's it. The trick part is that Vaseline is extremely difficult to remove from a slick surface. It's also disgusting.

Should you become a victim of this prank, there is one thing that takes it off the windshield with ease: newspaper. It is very oil absorbent and is the fastest way to clean up the slippery stuff. (Or am I just playing a prank on you by suggesting this?)

Scenario #2

Take some Vaseline and spread it around the earpiece on a telephone. Make sure not to get it in the holes of the earpiece. Make sure it is a thin layer so the victim won't feel the Vaseline as they are talking. They will find the Vaseline later and wonder where it came from.

Ho ho. It's so funny watching someone wrestle with Vaseline.

Scenario #3

This one is sort of an old standby. Smear Vaseline on a toilet seat. Gross. The victim will have the junk all over his/her ass and will have a hell of a time removing it.

Bomb the Suburbs

Here are two good ones for you young suburbanites. I know, I know, you hate it out there. But why not take out all that angst and release it through some creative subversion? This should get you started...

Plastic life

Go to local K mart or whatever and buy a giant bag of plastic picnic forks. Go to target's house, preferably at night so you don't get caught. Proceed to put the little white forks in their lawn, in their flowerbed, anywhere where they stick up. It looks really damn funny in the morning. Most people just won't know what to think.


And Then There Were None

Fill up a super-soaker water gun with a 24-hour weed and grass killer. Late at night you do a drive by on your enemy's lawn. It's as simple as that. Afterwards you could take a stroll by the baffled law manicurist and ask what happened to his/her prize lawn.

This is a great prank for the suburbs. Nothing upsets your average, law-abiding homeowner like an attack on his/her lawn.


I expect that there are some stone cold brats out there looking for something a little more... devious. This one should fit the bill. What it lacks in wacky slapstick appeal it makes up for in psychological damage.

A vacationing neighbor is a great victim for this number. It works even better if said neighbors are leaving the kids behind. Get yourself a bigass roll of "Police Line - Do Not Cross" tape. Then get yourself some dark red paint. All you have to do is put up the tape across the front of the house and drip some of the fake blood on the front steps and around the doorknob.

When seen by your average person, this should instantly throw the person into a very... uncomfortable... state.


here is the most simple prank of all. All you need is"


yes, bologna. All you do is throw is on your victim's car, wait twenty minutes, and bwammo!! Their paint is instantly removed!!

The Upper Deck

Perhaps the best and most disgusting prank to pull on someone. The title basically says it all. When the urge arises and if you can remember, just take off the tank lid of said victim's toilet and "throw down some brown" into the tank. It will take a while for the effects to be noticed, but it's well worth it. Besides, you'll be long gone by then.

You all getting this? The idea is to crap in the large tank behind the actual toilet. The smell of doodie will seem natural, if repellent, to the homeowner. So it will most likely be a good while before s/he checks what's happening.

Toilet Trouble

Needed: Gelatin (the clear stuff)

All you have to do is find a toilet - one that you don't use - and wait for the cover of night. Timing is very important, as you will see. Once you have found the perfect toilet just pour the gelatin into the toilet. After that it just has to have enough time to set and harden. The next morning the unsuspecting person will use the toilet just to find that it won't flush because they basically have a clear Jell-O mold of their toilet.

Very imaginative prank. This is also a relatively harmless caper. I mean, the vic only has to break up the gelatin with a stick or plunger. But still, it is very funny, especially if the prankee does a #2 before they see what's up.

Office Fun

At the win95/98 desktop open any program and restore it to its smaller window. Everything else on the desktop should look as normal. Now hit Print Screen. Open Paint, Paste, and Save. Now set the image as wallpaper. The application will look like it's still open. If you're feeling real nasty you can take a screenshot of the desktop as normal and after setting as wallpaper remove all icons and the taskbar.

Now this is good fun. Pranks that cause disorientation or confusion in the office are great because people usually try to keep their cool about them. To dismantle that is a bit cruel but can be very funny. Good luck

***!!!Trier Beware!!!***

Warning - illegal and possibly life threatening.

Take an empty two-liter bottle and fill one fifth with dry ice. Insert some warm water, screw on cap tight, insert into mailbox (the weaker type) and run like god-damned hell. Mailbox will explode.

Firstly, you probably shouldn't try this one. I mean, you probably couldn't - just because of the relative scarcity of dry ice - but you may want to leave this one to the experts.

But this prank reminds me of the scads of mailbox antics, the most popular being shattering it with a bat. It's not the most sophisticated or subtle work, but it seems to be pretty satisfying to countless suburban kids. But beware of explosions.

Mmm... Mmm... Good

One of the better pranks to do is take an Oreo cookie - or some other cookie with a filling in between it - and scrape all the filling out. Then get some toothpaste and make this the filling. Serve to the masses, and watch them cringe with horror. Please note that aquafresh toothpaste doesn't do as well, considering there are three different colors in it. Unless, if you can pass it off as a party Oreo to unsuspecting parents/children.

Brilliant - simple and effective. This is a good prank for beginners because there is no chance of anyone getting hurt, except perhaps the prankster. I would suggest that you all try it immediately.


Hi There. Wanna Puke?

First, get some sucker to bet some good money, because you're guaranteed to win the bet. Then, bet them that they can't drink a gallon of whole milk (it's gotta be whole, not skim or 2%) in an hour or less. Then, they have to keep it down for 20 minutes after they've finished it off. Guaranteed, in less than 20, they'll be puking harder and faster and with more volume than they will ever puke in their life. It's just not humanly possible to keep that much milk in your system. Be careful, this is full-powered projection vomiting, so make sure they do it outside or near a big toilet. Now go and collect your money.

I don't know why it's so funny to watch people vomit, but it is. The only tweak I would add to this little stunt is taking the vic out for a burrito before the challenge. Rice comes up real easy like.


You Cheap Bastard

Here is a prank for anywhere. Just superglue coins to the pavement. You'll need to find a spot that is both heavily trafficked and suitable for gluing - a front sidewalk or driveway works well, though you may need to clean the surface to get the coins to stick.

Another simple antic. The funny part is watching people try to pick up the coins. The only downside is that this prank gets old quick. It really isn't that exciting to watch after the first few times.

Hardcore Wrappers

Saran wrap someone's car. I know, it takes a long time, but my dad's a college professor, and somehow, his students managed to saran wrap most of the faculty's cars. Let me tell you, it's the funniest sight, and a bitch to get off. Another prank... saran wrap everything inside a house or office. This takes a lot of time, but when done, it's very satisfying (again, happened to my dad and some of the faculty).

This is a classic along the lines of TPing someone's property. (TPing something means covering it with TP, toilet paper.) The most basic saran wrap prank is putting it over someone's toilet and then setting with a hairdryer. Then when they squirt it goes all over the place. Of course, if they are visiting the WC for a more substantial evacuation, then the scene can get seriously ugly.

Anyway, this car prank is good. It's funny looking and relatively harmless.

Bad Computer!

(In order to contextualize this suggestion you should visit LizardWorks immediately. They are several computer pranks that are brilliant but require a bit of hardware savvy - at least more than yours truly possesses.)

My favorite is the Rude CD Tray (2nd from top). Every 20 seconds or so, the CD tray will open, and at the same time making a farting sound. It's hilarious when the people who use it didn't even know you can open a CD tray through software and think that their computer is possessed!

It would also be funny if you logged onto some porn site with the browser not covering any icons, and the pointer off of the screen, and then set it as the background. Could you imagine that?!?! Do it to someone at work, and when their boss walks by, and sees him frantically trying to close the browser! HA! Great column!

Well, I don't know if anyone would actually think their computer was possessed, but they would most likely be pretty damn confused. Remember, check out LizardWorks; they have some funny-as-hell stuff posted.

Wet Works

You know the nozzle on the kitchen sink, the one that scours the dishes but only sprays if the handle is pressed? Well simply put a rubber band around the handle and point it toward the front of the sink so that it sprays the person turning the water on. If mom and dad catch on after a while you can always color the rubber band black, as long as that is the color of the nozzle.

Brilliant - simple and effective. This is a good prank for beginners because there is no chance of anyone getting hurt, unless your parents/housemates are prone to violence. I would suggest that you all try it immediately.

Don't Answer That!!!

Call up the enemy's house pretending to be a telephone company employee. Tell them you are doing some maintenance work on the lines in the area, which may cause the telephone to ring. But you then proceed to warn them not to pick up the phone for the next hour because there could be a risk of electrocution, because the ringing is triggered by power surges. Tell them to let everyone in the house know of the risk and to keep away from the phone no matter how much it rings.

Now, you wait about 15 minutes and then call the people back. If they have taken you seriously then they shouldn't pick up the phone. Keep calling, over and over again - until eventually curiosity overcomes them and they pick it up. When they do, just start making a loud buzzing electrical noise. There's nothing funnier than that little shriek and the sound of the handset being thrown at the floor.

This comes from one of my readers Down Under. I am sure there are some ordinances against this type of behavior – there are for just about any fun you can have with a phone – but I would say the chances are slim that anyone would really care much, or even catch you for that matter.

In Vino Veritas

Get a spray cologne bottle and empty it out, while leaving cologne in the sprayer. Fill the bottle with some foul smelling anything (come on, be creative). Since the first spray that comes out of the bottle will be real cologne, he wont know what hit him. (please edit this as i am drunk

You might find this hard to believe, but this fellow's drunken grammar is still better than most of the mail I receive, which presumably comes from sober people. This is why I left the letter unedited. Anyway, the prank is very original and seems like it would work well. This prank is also nice because it allows for some creativity on the part of the prankster. I would try it with fish oil, but the possibilities are numerous.

Mmm… Mmm… Still Good

I tried the "Mmm… Mmm… Good" prank (It entails filling an Oreo with toothpaste. -ed.) and it worked successfully. However it worked a little better using a Twinkie. All you have to do is put a straw in the bottom whole and suck out the cream and fill it back up with toothpaste. It works better because it is a bigger mouth full of toothpaste.

Not only is that a lot of toothpaste, but also a hell of a lot of cream to suck out. Seems to me that the Twinkie would become suspiciously heavy, but I suppose it would work. This is a relatively easy gag with a fantastic payoff in either version.


Pull out a dollar bill, and take a quick trip to the toilet. When you are finished, wipe your ass with the dollar bill, preferably leaving a few decent size chunks left on the inside. Fold the dollar bill in half, leaving the soiled side unexposed. Now the fun begins.

Casually drop the dollar bill while walking down the street. In front of a store or other high traffic area where people are more likely to be looking down is best. Now walk across the street, take a seat, and get ready to watch the funniest expressions on peoples' faces you will ever see. They pick up the dollar, notice something is wrong, look inside, and BAM! are they grossed out.

Why would they be grossed out? Oh yeah… because they have crap all over their hands. Yes, this is a good prank. Given the crudeness of this prank, you might be surprised to learn that I didn't edit so much as a comma in that submission.

Something For The Holidays

Next time you go into a department store, or any store with theft alarms, take the white security tags off products and stick them onto the clothes of other customers or even put them on the bottom of a shopping cart. Then just follow your unsuspecting victim throughout the store until he/she tries to leave, and watch as they are humiliated and searched when the security alarm goes off. Even better if you do it at your own work when you get bored.

This seems like a nice way to iron a wrinkle into someone's holiday shopping trip. Hell, you could even help the clerks apprehend the "thief." Might as well make yourself a hero. You can also, as another reader suggested, pull the magnetic strips off library nooks and slip them into peoples' bags or pockets.

Anybody Seen My Hard drive?

This prank is just plain vicious - bordering on siliconicide (murder of white goods) - but particularly effective on department store computers (or pick any other large organization with unattended PCs).

Simply go into the Start menu and access the MS-DOS Prompt (within programs) then type in "FDISK". It should proceed to format their entire hard-drive yet keep the visual appearance of Windows '98 intact. Close MS-DOS box and flee the scene.

The nice thing about this trick is everything looks fine until the victim reboots the computer, only to find that everything is gone.

Computer pranks can be serious business. However, the location for this prank makes it a wonderful adventure. I mean, there's nothing personal on any of those store PCs. Hell, you could even ask the store clerk what was happening. Just make sure to have that real dumb look down pat.


Happy Holiday

Go to the web page of a local ritzy restaurant. Copy their logo, open up your favorite design program, and make a few "gift certificates." Make them out to the vic, and make them out for a good amount of money. Using a good stock paper will even make them more authentic looking. Then, give one to the vic for a present. They will go to the restaurant, order up a storm, and try to use the gift certificate for payment. They will turd their pants when the staff tells them it's a fake. I'm giving out like 5 certificates for Christmas! I'm gonna get my ass whooped! Yee-Haa!

Brilliant. Granted, this does take a bit of computer savvy. However, if you are reading this then you most likely have the skill for some simple PhotoShopping. The thing that really struck me about this letter, though, was the reader's attitude. I love the fact that he is totally excited about getting his ass whooped because of this great prank. It's the labor of love, I tell ya.


What's That Noise?

Well, you find someone's car you don't really like, take the hubcap off, put in metal balls or marbles, and put the cap back on. When the person starts the car and goes, s/he will hear a loud noise, but it will disappear once the car gets going. It will then start up again at a stop. Just some harmless fun.

This is the kind of creativity that should really be rewarded in life. Unfortunately, it goes unnoticed for the most part. A terrific prank: easy, harmless, and seriously vexing for the victim.


Yeah, When I Rented This Tape…

Have you ever heard of a "rare earth" magnet? They aren't cheap, but are the most powerful magnets in the world. Put one of these in your pocket and walk into your neighborhood video store. You won't even have to get that close to the videos, but you'll wipe them all out! Have fun!

Some words for the wise: This is straight-up illegal behavior. I recommend against it, although it is a good prank. If you do pull this stunt, DON"T do it at a neighborhood vide store. Do those mom-and-pop shops a favor and do this at Blockbuster or Hollywood Video.



For this one you will need some readily available supplies: some metal cans, some fishing string, and two trashcans (or something around that height).

First you tie a set of two cans together. Then you measure how long the road is so you know you have enough length. Then cut the string when it's the length of the road plus some slack. Then tie it together to two other cans but the cans have to be tied together also as the first. Now set it up on the trash cans on the separate sides of the road then make sure that the string is tight enough so it doesn't sag. Then watch the car take the cans down the street. You can hear them for miles. The people in the car don't even know the cans are being dragged. It's damn funny

That is a really convoluted explanation, but you get the idea. It's like a Brady Bunch burglar alarm. The car catches the string and pulls the cans down the road makes quite a ruckus. This is simple, bt time intensive. It's not that I don't think it is worth the effort, but be warned that there is a lot of prep work.



If you know anyone who looks like a druggie, then try this. Get a sandwich bag and fill it half way with dry oregano. Fold it up, toss it in their general area, and call attention to it! A face of shock and worry should sweep over them. Also works with laundry soap for the cokehead in your life.

I just threw this one in for the morons. As you all know, any self respecting "druggie" can tell the difference between bud and oregano a mile away. And if anything, I would think that a look of supreme luck would sweep over their face, not worry.


Mmm… Mmm… Good

Buy some cotton balls and semi sweet cooking chocolate. Melt the chocolate in a pan and then dip the cotton balls in it. Place the cotton balls on wax paper and allow to cool ( a freezer also works well). You may need to pour some addition chocolate from the pan on top of the cotton ball. If you do it correctly, they should look like bonbons or some other chocolate delicacy. Place faux bonbons on a plate and leave out on your coffee table, break room table at work, or whatever. Most people will figure it out before they swallow. Those with large appetites, who wolf them down, will figure it out after about the second one.

I will be doing this and videotaping it very soon. I am going to try it at work, so we should have some good footage. I would suggest that everyone with a stove try this immediately. Of course, tape it so that you can send it to me.



People with braces often sleep with their mouth wide open. All this prank requires is a nine-volt battery. When the vic falls asleep, simply place the battery on their braces. The bladder of the poor vic will flow like a river. The brain normally sends a small electrical charge to the bladder and urinate. The battery sends a large charge!

This reminded me that you can also just touch a nine-volt to a sleeper's tongue. The zap is quite minor and will not seriously hurt the vic, but they should definitely get a start. I have never heard of this quality of braces. However, they obviously conduct very well, so it seems like it could work. Go try and let me know. Just lay off anyone with a pacemaker.


Magician Seeks Helper

Tell someone you have learned a brand new magic trick that lets you float a glass on the ceiling, but to do it you need their help. Grab your equipment: a glass (preferably plastic to prevent breakage) full of water and a broom, but hint that you will need other equipment eventually.

Now for the prank. Stand up on a chair and push the open end of the glass against the ceiling. Then hold the broom against the glass so it stays there from the support of the broom alone. It's time to say that you need to get the last piece of equipment for the magic trick. Ask your assistant to hold the broom in place as you go get it.

Now just walk away, taking the chair with you. The poor gimp is now left there until someone can take pity on him enough to take the glass down.

This prank is an old bar trick, though I don't know of anyone that has actually done it. For a better prank, fill the glass up with liquid, preferably beer. Great stuff.



Go to any store and buy gelatin. Mix it up in a glass jar very weakly so it's still a bit liquidity. Then, while not wearing any deodorant, go exercise and get really sweaty. Wait a few minutes so that you really reek and then soak up some armpit sweat with a Q-tip. Smear the stank smelling sweat in the gelatin and leave it with the lid on in the sun for 3 days to a week. (This obviously works best in summer). Remove the lid and you have the most worst smelling liquid on the planet. Put it wherever for some fun.

Gosh, I really don't know what to say. How this reader figured this out is beyond me. However, I applaud the creativity.


I Got Your School Spirit Right Here

Put big sheets of white "art" paper - like the kind used in pep rallies - over the outside of a dorm room doorway. You and your friends get up a little early to stand out in the hall and clap and cheer when the roommate who's in on the prank jumps through the paper (like a football game). The next day, repeat the procedure, placing a candy or drink machine behind the paper. When the 2nd roommate, who's not in on it, tries to burst through the paper for his/her applause, BOOM! S/he will hit the back of the machine and rebound back into the room.

Clever stuff. I like the fact that this prankster is clearly not blinded by sexism. It seems like this would be a difficult prank to pull off. However, if successful, this would be hilarious, though somebody would probably get injured.


Can I Help You?

Here is a funny phone prank that requires voice acting, or more than one person. Call a random house and ask for "George." They will, in all probability, tell you that it's a wrong number and hang up. Call back with a different voice asking for that person. Do this four or five times. Then, call back in a different voice and say, "Hey, this is George. Do I have any messages?"

This is straight Jerky Boys style – not that that's bad. Nice and simple with a minimum of potential trouble. A great one for you beginners.


File Under "Advanced"

This is actually not that complicated, but your heart really has to be in it. Go to a bathroom with a plunger next to the toilet. Oh yeah, before hand, you have to eat a whole mess of burritos. Take a crap, hopefully a long ass-one, in the toilet. Then, with a sharp nail or a drill, make small holes in the plunger rubber area. Small holes - so nobody can see them. Then just leave.

When the janitor comes and tries to unclog the toilet with the plunger, the s**t juice will squirt out of the plunger and onto his shirt or worse, his face. Why? When you push the plunger, it creates a vacuum and then all the stuff in the toilet gets pushed out through the holes in the plunger.

This is some priceless shtit. However, unless you know that the janitor is a real asshole, I wouldn't make him or her the victim. They have enough shtit to deal with without poop juice shooting up at them. Why not just do it at an enemy's house, or to your parents when you're pissed?


Hey, Sexy

Take someone's e-mail address who you know to be something a prude and sign them up for free porno pictures. The more decadent and outrageous, the better! You could do this to anyone who posts their e-mail anywhere!

This is another great one beginners. However, some subscriptions require a response in order to become active. Porn sites play pretty loose with the rules, though, so good luck. In fact, I have a feeling somebody did this to me. I get so much of it; my inbox is pretty racy these days.


Is God Going Pee Pee?

In your car, turn the windshield washer jets sideways so that they shoot sideways and out from the car. Then, go to a crowded area with sidewalks, maybe a shopping center or something, and drive by people and fire away. They'll never know what hit them.

The washer jets are not adjustable on newer cars, so this might be difficult to pull off, at least logistically. However, you could probably run right up on someone, do this, and not be detected. I mean, who would expect a car next to them to be spraying them? Good stuff.


Somebody Stop That Guy!

This prank takes a little time to prepare but works great! Get yourself a wheelchair, from a flea market or wherever. Then have a friend help you put a fake cast on your leg and let it dry. (Duh.) Now just find an area filled with lots of people and happily move yourself around on the wheelchair. Have your friends pull up beside you in a van and push you over. Then have them offer to help you up - "Hey buddy, are you okay?" But really have them pretend to steal your wallet and leave the scene. Everybody will think that they robbed you.

This is right up my alley. The ones that trick crowds are always the best, especially when they screw with basic elements of right and wrong, i.e. mugging a differently-abled person. The reader prefaced this prank by saying that it was "a crude prank that works especially good in Canada!" Strange but true.


What The Hell Is That?

This one is pretty simple but can drive someone crazy. I did this to my boss at work and he was going nuts. It's a great work prank. First you get one of those stuffed animals that makes a noise when you squeeze it. I used a dog that barked. Remove the device that makes the noise when you squeeze it. Then take a desk drawer out of the victim's desk. Using double sided tape, attach the device to the back of the drawer. Make sure there is enough room between the back of the drawer and the inside of the desk that the drawer can slide back in far enough that it isn't sticking out noticeably. But also be sure that it will be striking something to set off the device. From that point on the victim will go crazy trying to figure out where the noise is coming from and/or why they hear the noise every time they close the drawer. For a bit of added fun leave the stuffed animal in the immediate area. They think it is coming from that animal but can't figure out why.

This was obviously the labor of love. It really excites me to see such industry in a prankster.