I have not written a sonnet in a long time, perhaps I will take them up again some time. For now, enjoy these "old" ones.
I.
Does it surprise you that I still care,
Is it wrong that I still hope?
For with you my feelings I did not spare
As I traversed a dangerous slope.
You have touched my soul inside,
And so I gave you all of me
With you my love I did not hide
And in your eyes, your pain, I see.
You can't accept my true love,
So you turned and walked away
My dear, I thought you a gift from above
That's why I still love you yet today
Your healing will come, someday, somehow
So I set you free, right here, right now.
II.
Is it right that true love escapes me?
Is it wrong to want so much more?
It's been years since I've prayed on bended knee,
But it sure beats fetal on the floor!
I feeling so much better
Now that I'm getting it out
I've written many an unsent letter
And trying hard not to pout
I'm finally growing as a man
And feel better since I've stopped drinking
So I'll pass on that beer can
And spend my time feeling and thinking
I know in time I will succeed
But true love's glance I truly need
III.
O what cruel fate has laughed this time
My heart was ready, too long gone fallow
I rushed right in a forgivable crime
And cast my lot with a maiden callow
This fair lady was loves true light
So like a moth, drawn to her flame
I loved her truly with all my might
My heart still quickens at her name
Yet fates cruel hand, she did trick me
And so in love I stepped and stumbled
And now I sob on bended knee
Once proud, I now am humbled
As of now I walk alone
The sound I hear, sorrows moan
IV.
Time has not healed this festering wound
And lo I try to forget thy face
I find at night my thoughts consumed
With distant times and loves old place
I put up the toe ring you did give
The only token of your affection
But in my mind you still live
How could have I mistaken my selection?
A pained young maiden I did choose
And poured out my flask of hope
I had no thought I would lose
My imagined love, so now I mope
I am amazed I was so foolish
To hold her still, my heart is mulish
V.
I finally saw you yesterday,
on your stoop with a beer
my sudden nerves I strove to stay
yet I trembled with you so near
You inquired in to my well being
and I stammered my poor reply
It took my strength to keep from fleeing
I could not look you in the eye
But noticed early you've grown so thin
Are you happy now you've gone solitary
your inner battle did you yet win
do you enjoy your exile voluntary?
I thought I was stronger but proved I am weak
for in turning back your eyes I did seek
VI.
How many friends does one man need?
to walk with him on his path
Do not collect them out of greed
just a few close by to help him laugh
How many loves can one man keep?
or use his arms to tenderly hold
and nuzzle close in his sleep
to remember when he is old
there is but one he must truly treasure
one he must never neglect
the most important by any measure
and to himself give due respect
It is but a simple truth
a happy life is ample proof
VII.
What pleasure comes to finally sleep
to drift in comfort in my own bed
Memories of lovers beds I do still keep
just warm now, the passions dead
The joy I find in being alone
is comfort taken in my own self
Choosing not to sleep with the phone
an investment made in my own wealth
The stirrings of joy I do now feel
and notice my spirit growing stronger
Were I a bell, I'd surely peal
despite my life shadow growing longer
full of love, hope and trust
to push forward I think I must
VIII
It's not that I mind being alone
for that does not make me lonley
My past sins, to my self I will atone
being real now and not a phony
Not long ago I had a taste
and thought I had found my mate
and while it failed, I consider it not a waste
just a lesson at the hands of fate
I'm sure she is out there
there may even be more than one
I wonder what color will be her hair?
I hope I find her before I'm done
So I keep on, keeping on
Keep on hoping until I'm gone.
IX.
What passion time has dulled
a sodden coal, not a blaze
and selected memories are those culled
the bad ones foggy, in a haze
Funny how perceptions change
and we pick which ones to keep
and those we will estrange
to shadowy lands of our sleep
So, let us make new ones soon
and dance with frenzied joy
to the strains of joyous tune
and our hearts again employ
It is only right to look forward
for the past is far too untoward
X.
Tentative connection awkwardly met,
how long has this heart been closed to chance?
Stronger now, soft cheeks not wet,
hating to sit, but afraid to dance.
Like a seed in cold earth that may still sprout,
but from ill-timed planting it's death can catch.
Hold! Remain kind and gentle for the lessons throughout,
for new, and without pretense is this match.
Perhaps to find hope she has come to this place,
the maiden, to learn there are yet men who are kind.
To hold dear in his heart, her image, her face,
the man, to not rush things, his patience refined.
Time will tell what memories unfold,
lets hope they are fond ones, when they are both old.
